First lessons (Medieval Tale Book 1)

by Lina J. Potter

“Let me see it.”

  Aliya examined the weapon and nodded. “This will do for now. We’ll get you a better weapon later. There must be some weapons left in the castle. He can’t have taken them all!”

  Judging by the looks on the men’s faces, they knew exactly what she wanted and didn’t mind doing it.

  ***

  Aliya didn’t get home until late evening. She was mad as a hornet, tired, and hungry, but she decided she wouldn’t eat until she had finished cleaning out the corruption in her household.

  The castle was quiet. She smelled burned porridge and saw dirty streaks on the floor. She snorted and headed for the kitchen. Her instincts were correct. All the servants, the Comptroller, and his wife were sitting in the kitchen. They didn’t look as cheerful as they had that morning.

  Aliya sailed right in. “I see you’re having a nice break. Is the stable sparkling clean, or does it look as bad as the castle? If you gentlemen, and I can’t remember all your names, threw some straw on the floors and thought that was good enough, then I’m here to disappoint you. You’ll wish you’d never seen that straw when I’m done whipping you. Is that clear?”

  Judging by the color of the grooms’ faces, they understood her perfectly. Aliya smiled and added a few more expressions she had picked up from her days as an army brat. She had read somewhere that what was called foul language actually used to be magical incantations, and that would explain the magical effect her words had on the grooms, who jumped up and ran off to finish their jobs.

  She turned her bright eyes to the chambermaids, who didn’t even wait for her to speak before flying from the room. Last, she turned to the Comptroller with a friendly grin that bared her teeth. “I think it’s time for the two of us to have a chat.”

  Etor’s face went pale. He swallowed. Then he followed her from the kitchen.

  Aliya already knew where his office was. She sat down at his desk and smiled at him again.

  “Well? Let’s see your reports.”

  “But My Lady, why would you—”

  “The reports!” she growled. Her tone was so convincing that Etor gave in and opened the chest where he kept his books. Aliya suspected that it wasn’t just her voice that won him over. The four young men who had come in with her—two of Emma’s sons, the village elder’s son, and the older brother of the boy she had stitched up, all of whom held axes in their long arms—played their role as well, as they eyed the Comptroller.

  It had taken her all day to find the men she needed, agree on payment with them, get transportation back to the castle for them, and have the blacksmith fix her horses’ shoes. She was looking at more long hours back in the village the next day. Aliya was too tired to be angry at that point in the evening, but she still had plenty of choice words left in her vocabulary.

  However, when the Comptroller laid six big books on the table in front of her, even her favorite swear words left her.

  “Tell me what this book is.”

  “It’s a list of revenue.”

  “What about this one?”

  “Expenses.”

  Aliya thumbed through the books, which were nothing but columns of numbers. “Wonderful. Now, I want you to stand over here next to me and read down each column with me—how much the estate made and on what. Give me some paper and a quill. While you read out loud, I’m going to take notes and do some adding. Then we’ll look at expenses.”

  She had hit just the right tone with him. She could have waded through the accounts on her own, but it would have taken twice as long. Time was money, and Aliya didn’t want to waste either.

  Etor did his best to weasel out of the position he was in. He wheedled and pleaded and tried to confuse her with complicated terms and irrelevant information, but he was out of luck. Aliya had been raised on 21st-century television news channels, the champion liars of all time; Etor never stood a chance. Once she wrote everything out, added it up and made some comparisons, the truth was clear.

  The estate Comptroller had been ripping her off. He was stealing excessively, stupidly, and far above his pay grade. She had three options, the way she saw it: she could fire him, drag him into court, or have him whipped. A man couldn’t walk very far after a hundred lashes, and he couldn’t very well complain to the King while holding his head in one hand. She could do whatever she wanted with the Comptroller.

  On second thought, it was her husband who could do whatever he wanted. Aliya wasn’t sure exactly where her authority ended, so she decided to be creative. Turning to Etor, she suggested that he return three-quarters of what he’d stolen and take the remaining one-quarter to tide him over while he looked for another job. If he didn’t like that option, he could always have his head chopped off, and Aliya would hold his wife’s feet to the fire to find out where he kept all his money.

  Etor’s opening offer was one hundred gold coins. When she countered by threatening to hang him on the spot, that amount doubled. Aliya had no intention of letting him go easily. Hold a genie over a hot frying pan, and he will give you ten times more wishes. Etor quickly doubled his offer again. After lengthy negotiations (the young men did all the negotiating, with Aliya telling them where to hit him), he doubled it once again.

  In the end, Aliya got about eight hundred gold coins out of him. She had a strong suspicion that this was only half of what he had stolen, but it was plenty for what she intended to do.

  She should have had him disemboweled, or at least drag him in front of a judge. Execution was too good for him, but she didn’t think she could hand down a death sentence, even if she had the authority.

  Etor sensed her changing mood. He crawled in front of her and whined like a puppy, nearly licking her shoes, and begged to be allowed to care for his small children and elderly parents. Aliya knew he was lying and that she would lose face by letting him go. On the other hand, she thought, no one in this world respects me anyway. She wouldn’t tell anyone that she’d let him go, and she suspected that she could make the village men hold their tongues, as well.

  There was always more than one way to shear a sheep. Instead of a judge and public hanging (where she suspected she’d make a fool of herself), she asked Emma’s son to ride through all the villages and tell people that the Comptroller had been thrown out and would be leaving Earton in the morning with his wife. If Emma’s son didn’t wish to go on this errand, he could send boys to carry the news.

  Then she caught the young man’s eye and, smiling broadly, added, “Let the people sell him a horse if they think he deserves it.”

  The young man gave a wolfish grin that made Aliya shiver. She wouldn’t use her own hands, but the Comptroller would get what he had coming to him. Let the people you robbed be your judges.

  ***

  Morning came early the next day. She had left the curtains open on purpose, and the sun’s first rays made it impossible to sleep. Lilian Earton’s body protested, and its sore muscles whined, but Aliya was ruthless.

  Time to get up! Don’t like it? That’s your problem. I’ve got exercises to do. Squats, push-ups, sit-ups, jumping jacks, lunges.

  She grabbed the first dress she saw in the closet. Aliya decided she would ask Martha to sew her a couple of simple dresses for every day. She would have preferred to wear nothing but an undershirt, which in 21st-century terms, was a plain shift dress that went to her ankles, but people would be shocked. She did, however, refuse the myriad petticoats and cotton pants as too much fabric for one woman to wear.

  Martha appeared after Aliya had already managed to pull a dress over her head and was swearing at whoever decided that women’s clothes should lace up the back. Without the bulky underclothes, Aliya no longer felt so huge.

  “Good morning, Lily. How did you sleep?”

  “Wonderful, Nanny. Could you help me with this?”

  “But why were you doing it alone? I always help you.” Aliya barely listened as her nanny went off on her favorite topic. “It doesn’t fit for a lady… I can do everything for you… You sho
uldn’t have to lift a finger…”

  Good grief! Next thing I know, Martha will try to help me on and off the toilet.

  She interrupted the old woman with a question. “Nanny, has Etor left?”

  “Yes, he and his wife left as soon as it got light.”

  Aliya smirked to herself. “Did the people sell him a horse?”

  “The boys from the village came back to see them off. I believe they knocked him around a little bit before they let him go.”

  “I hope it was more than a little bit.”

  “Lily!”

  “He had it coming. But that’s enough of that. Back to cleaning. I won’t live in this sty!”

  “Lily, surely you exaggerate?”

  “Can’t you see it? This place is knee-deep in dirt everywhere I look! We’ve got some hard work ahead of us. At least ten days. Shall we get started?”

  “But what about your breakfast?”

  “I thought I fired the cook.”

  “You did, but you can always order…”

  “None of that. Isn’t Emma here yet? I’ll send a carriage for her.”

  “Lily! You want to send your carriage for a peasant woman?”

  “So what?”

  “Even the doctor has never ridden in your carriage.”

  “Emma is much more intelligent than the doctor. I hope she found the people I asked her for.”

  The day before, Aliya had asked Emma to find two dozen women for the dirty job of cleaning the castle properly. She had no money for real repairs yet, but even a good cleaning would help.

  “Who around here knows how to cook?” Aliya was perfectly capable of cooking for herself, but she didn’t know how to use a wood-burning stove, and she was afraid she would look silly trying to learn.

  “I suppose anyone can…”

  “Perfect. Then have one of the girls cook something simple.”

  “But…”

  “I don’t want any more fancy breakfasts with eight different dishes. Just a big pot of buckwheat with meat, and maybe some bread and cheese. Is that clear?”

  “Lily, I don’t think…”

  “I can live on porridge. It won’t kill me. Nanny, please just do as I ask. And have all the servants who are still here wait for me downstairs in the kitchen.”

  Martha nodded and hurried from the room.

  Aliya sighed. She opened the wardrobe and looked at herself in the polished metal mirror again.

  “What do you say, Lilian Earton? We aren’t from around here, but we can shape this place up. I hope. Are you scared? Just take a deep breath and hold on. Nobody dies twice, right?”

  Her reflection shook all three of its chins. It was not happy.

  Aliya laughed out loud when she thought about what she had just said. She’d already died once. She wondered if it were possible that she had become immortal. In any case, she wasn’t Aliya. She was Lily—Lilian, the Countess of Earton.

  Anyone who doesn’t like my new ways will get a mop upside the head!

  ***

  The woman who went downstairs was in a good mood and feeling sure of herself; the inexperienced girl left farther in the past. Her servants met her with foreboding, but the young men she had hired the day before were pleased with the turn of events thus far—especially the estate Comptroller’s ouster.

  “That’s just the start,” Lilian said to herself, grinning.

  “More cleaning today,” she said briefly. “The grooms get another day to finish the stable. The horses are in terrible condition, and so are the carriages. If you let things get that bad again, I’ll have you all whipped. Get going! Breakfast will be later, once I see that you know how to do something other than eat.”

  One of the grooms opened his mouth to say something, but Lilian brought her fist down on the table. The table groaned. Sometimes, being a large woman comes in handy.

  “Quiet! Do as I say! All of you, march!”

  The grooms obeyed in silence. Aliya slowly lets her breath out. When she turned around, she almost fell over Emma’s son. He had been standing behind her the whole time without saying a word, but his eyes spoke clearly. She sighed. Apparently, she wasn’t as convincing as she had hoped. She realized she needed her own guards. It was the Middle Ages, and people would only listen to her if they thought they could get something out of her or if she had proper firepower. Sad but true.

  Lilian turned to the chambermaids. “Ladies, let’s see your hands.” The girls stared at her, but obediently held out their hands for inspection.

  Their hands looked good. There wasn’t a single callous among them. These girls have been hired to clean, but they’re sitting around eating and drinking at my expense without doing any work in return!

  Aliya knew how much hard work went into cleaning even a small medical office. She and her mother had often suffered from cracked skin caused by harsh cleaners. Her chambermaids’ hands looked like they had never touched a floor, much less washed it.

  Aliya’s eyes flashed. “You listen to me; there will be no breakfast today. Mary and Ilona, take the sheets you stripped off the beds yesterday and go wash them. If I see a single spot on them when you’re done, I’ll have you whipped alongside the grooms. Sarah, go help Martha in the kitchen. Make enough food for about twenty people. Just buckwheat with beef, nothing else. Jean, Peter and Claus, you follow me.”

  She started in the library. The drapes came down, and the furniture was moved out so that the chambermaid could clean the entire floor. Servants with huge rags wiped the dust and dirt off of everything in the room. Jean climbed up a dangerous-looking contraption that he called a ladder to sweep the spider webs off the twelve-foot-high ceilings. Aliya emptied out desk drawers while she watched them work and issued orders. It was no easy feat to keep three full-grown men working on the task. As soon as she took her eyes off them, one would start daydreaming about his lady friend, Mary, the second would accidentally knock the moldings off the ceiling, and the third would begin tossing books as if they were bricks. She was lucky to stop him before he ruined any of them.

  They don’t scare me. I’ve done harder jobs!

  ***

  Anna slowly combed out her hair. Things were going well so far. Mila had made her try on dresses all day, which, when she thought about it, was a good thing. If I want to catch a big fish, I need to use good bait. Help me, Aldonai.

  The door creaked.

  “Lons! Have you lost your mind?”

  The man slipped into the room. He took the comb from her hands and began to run it through her thick hair.

  “You know I lost my mind over you a long time ago.”

  “I told you not to come near me while my father’s here.”

  Lons put down the comb and pressed his lips against the back of her head. “Anna, I can’t live without you. You’re my whole life.”

  “This is interesting. Have you two known each other long?” the voice slashed the lovers like a whip. Anna would have screamed, but she clapped her hand over her mouth in time. Lons turned. The King’s Jester stood in the doorway holding a crossbow, and the arrow was pointed straight at Anna’s husband.

  “I can’t hear you.”

  To Lons’ credit, he didn’t fall on his knees. “I’ve loved Anna for a long time. She is my wife in God’s eyes.”

  “How sweet. Who heard your vows?”

  “The priest here at the castle.”

  “Father Linder?”

  “No, Father Zemin.”

  “I see. The one that died this spring?”

  Anna nodded. There was something of her father in her, so she knew what was coming.

  “Then tell him he made a mistake.” The bow twanged. If Lons hadn’t made a dodge for the window, he would have been dead on the floor. As it was, the arrow, grazed his right side. An instant later the paper covering the window tore, and Lons disappeared into the night.

  Anna pressed her hand to her mouth as hard as she could. The Jester noticed. He took a flask from his pocket and held
it out to her. “Drink this.”

  She shook her head, but he insisted. She took a sip, and then another.

  “It isn’t poison. It’s just strong wine. Drink.”

  Obediently, Anna swallowed some more of the heady drink. A warm, liquid flame ran through her body. She coughed but stayed standing.

  “Good girl. I’m glad you know enough to stay quiet.”

  Anna nodded. She didn’t know what this little man in bright clothes wanted, but she knew she’d have to go along with it, whatever it was. If he let a word slip, she’d be up on the scaffold in no time. Gardwig didn’t play games. People called him the Lion of Wellster and, like a lion, he didn’t care who he ripped into.

  “Now talk. Who was that?”

  “My teacher.”

  “I always said that education is no good for girls. Breasts are enough. How long have you been with him?”

  “Two years.”

  “Fool. Do you have children with him?”

  “N-no.”

  “That’s bad. Are you barren?”

  Anna shook her head. “Lons always brought a potion with him.”

  “I see.”

  “He wanted to ask Father for my hand.”

  The Jester sneered. He knew what the king would say about giving his daughter to a teacher who, although he was a member of the nobility, had no estate of his own.[8] Just hilarious!

  “Here’s what’s going to happen. Tomorrow, I’ll let everyone know that he stole some jewels and ran off. We will keep the story simple.”

  Anna stared at the Jester. She was feeling the effects of the wine. “And you won’t…”

  “No, I won’t. Hurting you isn’t in my interests. If you keep your mouth shut, I will, too. Gardwig doesn’t need a scandal right now, but he does need a closer friendship with Edward. I don’t want to catch you with anyone else. Is that clear?”

  She nodded. “Why would I bother with trifles when I can have a crown?”

  “I see there’s hope for you…and a little of your father in you.”

  Anna nodded again. “I won’t say anything. But what about Lons?”

  “Other than you and the priest, does anyone know?”

  “No, just the priest.”