Spliced

by Robin Leigh Miller

  “I’m not talking about her,” Stone growled in his face. “I’m talking about you. Is this your mode of operation? Fuck ‘em and then dangle ‘em while you sit back and get your ego boost? You either take her for good or walk the fuck away for good.”

  Ridge grabbed Stone by the front of his uniform shirt and cocked his fist, ready to drive it straight down the man’s throat.

  “Go ahead, Gates. Give me a reason to throw your ass in jail. With you locked up maybe she’ll have a chance to put her head on straight so she can see who treats her like a woman and not a fucking play toy.”

  Ridge froze. Stone would lock him up too. It would give the man a chance to wedge himself in tight with Avery. Behind bars, he couldn’t keep an eye on her, couldn’t find out who wanted to hurt her. Ridge lowered his fist.

  “You lock me up and I can’t keep her safe.”

  “I’ll keep her safe,” Stone snarled as he pulled away from Ridge. “Damn you, Gates. I’m not going to fight you today. You’re hurting. You just buried your best friend. I can see this is tearing you apart and damn it, I feel for you.”

  “I don’t want your sympathy,” Ridge shot back. He didn’t want pity, not from the man trying to work his way into Avery’s life.

  “Too fucking bad, you have it anyway.” Stone pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m really sorry about Cale Easton’s death. I get the feeling him and Avery were closer than usual, that something in their life held them tighter than most siblings and without him she’ll flounder for a while.”

  “So you think you can step in and make it all better for her while grabbing some personal gratification at the same time. Who’s jerking her around, Stone? Maybe you need to step back and take a good long look at yourself.”

  “If that’s what it takes for you to sleep better at night, you keep believing that. Here’s a question for you. Why do you even care? Answer that question and then maybe you can pull your head out of your ass and do the right thing.”

  Ridge had to refrain from grabbing the man again. He knew why he cared so fucking much. He didn’t need to think about it. It still didn’t make the situation right.

  “Oh, by the way. The gun used to shoot out her car windows,” Stone said halfway back to his truck, “was used in a shooting back in your old stomping grounds—Afghanistan. Some big wheel meeting with a tribal elder was gunned down. There’s something for you to think about.”

  The ground dropped out from under Ridge. The earth spun at warp speed and he had to brace himself so he wouldn’t fall. God, no. Had Cale’s demons come looking for Avery? He watched Stone pull away with her in his truck and for the second time in his life knew what helplessness was. Was this why Cale was so insistent he watch out for his sister? Ridge vowed from now until whoever it was gunning for her was behind bars, Avery wouldn’t leave his sight no matter what he had to do.

  * * * * *

  “I wish you’d reconsider staying with me tonight,” Kevin grumbled as he pulled up in front of her house. “I’d sleep better knowing you were safe.”

  Avery opened the truck door and jumped out. All of a sudden everyone wanted her staying in their home. How ridiculous. “Thank you, but I need to be in my own home.”

  Together they gathered her bags and lugged them to the door. Kevin put out his arm and halted her progress into the house. Avery bit her tongue to keep from snapping at him.

  “Punch in your alarm code and then step back out. I want to check out the house before you go in.”

  “Is this necessary?”

  “Humor me, please.”

  Fine. If it got him out of her hair she’d do it. Stepping in the house, she punched in her code, stepped back out on the porch and swept her arm through the air. “It’s all yours.”

  Kevin pulled his gun and entered the house in half a crouch. While he did the cop thing, she leaned against the banister and wondered just when her life had become the center of other people’s interests. She could walk into a room with exactly three people in it and never be noticed. Now, two men nearly came to blows over her and someone was getting their jollies destroying her possessions.

  A large box truck pulled up in front of her house and two men emerged. Kevin came out and waved to the strangers.

  “That would be your new mattress,” he said, picking up her bags.

  At least she’d have something to sleep on tonight. Hell, she didn’t even care if she had sheets or a pillow. All she wanted right now was someplace to lie down, a clean glass and two bottles of wine.

  “Show us where you want it and we’ll be outta here in under fifteen,” one of the men said to Kevin.

  Kevin seemed to be running the show at the moment and quite frankly, she was willing to let him. With every tick of the clock her stamina faded until she wasn’t sure she’d even be able to walk up the stairs to her bedroom.

  “Am I clear to enter my home?” she asked Kevin.

  “All clear,” he answered, nodding and giving her a smile.

  Avery stepped inside, dropped her bags and went straight to her fridge. Two bottles of wine were all that survived the destruction. That was all she needed. Pulling one out, she rummaged through her drawers and glory be, she found a corkscrew. As she fought to uncork her liquid salvation, Kevin and the two delivery men hauled her new mattress up the stairs and into her bedroom.

  Once the cork popped free Avery held the bottle under her nose and breathed in its sweet, fruity aroma. Yeah, she needed this. Next she opened every single cupboard looking for a glass. Finally, when she realized none existed, she simply put the bottle to her lips, tipped it back and took one healthy gulp.

  “You should eat something.” Kevin stood in the entranceway with his arms folded across his wide chest.

  “Don’t want to,” she said, taking another long gulp. “Did they need my credit card number to pay for the mattress?” As unladylike as she could be, Avery wiped her lips with the back of her hand.

  “You’ll get a bill in the mail. I assume you have insurance?”

  “Yep.” Thank the heavens because it was going to cost her an arm and a leg to replace everything she’d lost. She didn’t even have a dish to eat off. The thought of having to go out and buy all the odds and ends she’d need to get her life back in order had her gulping down more wine.

  “Have you eaten at all today?”

  “No, and I’m not interested in eating. Leave me alone.” She kicked off her shoes and leaned her butt against the counter.

  “You’ll get drunk faster if you don’t have anything else in your system.”

  Avery rolled her eyes and glared at him. “I appreciate your concern and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. I can’t even begin to thank you for sweeping in and taking care of things for me, but I’ve had one hell of a day and I think I earned the right to get drunk.”

  “Getting drunk won’t bring him back.”

  “No shit,” she growled, jerking away from the counter to pace the floor. Did he honestly think she was that stupid?

  “Okay. Maybe you did earn the right to get drunk. You shouldn’t be alone if you are. At least let me stay.”

  Snorting, she turned to him. “I’m a big girl, Lieutenant. I can handle getting drunk all on my own and I might as well get used to being alone. This,” she said, swinging the bottle through the air, “is my life now. Empty. The sooner I deal with it the sooner I can move on.”

  Kevin took two long strides toward her, gripped her arms and pulled her hard against his body. “You don’t have to be alone,” he snapped into her face. “You choose to be alone. I’m right here. I’m offering what you need but you won’t take it. Why?”

  Avery pulled out of his grip and turned her back as she guzzled more wine. The alcohol already buzzed through her system and made her head light and her limbs tingle. She didn’t want to discuss this with him.

  “I’ll tell you why,” he snarled behind her. “Because you’re waiting around hoping Gates comes running to you. Wake up, Aver
y. It isn’t going to happen. You gave yourself to him once and how did he repay you? He left you. Walked the fuck out on you after he got what he wanted.”

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about. It wasn’t like that.” Ridge had come that night expecting—wanting—her to blame him for Cale’s death, she reminded herself. She’d thrown herself at him, practically begged him to take her and God, she’d had to force him to with her thoughts.

  Shame. What she’d done to him was shameful and degrading. She’d even told him to pretend she was someone else if he had to. How much lower could she sink? Did she really believe he’d want her after all these years of him basically ignoring her? What a pathetic dope she was.

  “He used you, Avery.”

  “No,” she said, swinging around and stumbling. “I used him, Kevin. You don’t know the first thing about me, or him. I used him. I used my brother’s death to get what I wanted. Do you think I don’t know that I’m not pretty enough, sexy enough or sophisticated enough for him? I’ve always known that so I used his grief and pain to my own advantage.” And Ridge, acting on a promise he’d made to his best friend, had let himself be used.

  How disgusted he had to have been. No wonder he didn’t want her knowing where he lived. Humiliated and ashamed, she turned away from Kevin and tried to drown her crimes in a bottle.

  Kevin wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled the wine bottle from her hand. “If he can’t see how beautiful and sexy you are then he’s a bigger fool than I thought. You have a perfect mixture of sophistication and down-to-earth qualities that would make any man proud to have you. I don’t ever want to hear you put yourself down like that again.”

  His lips brushed against her neck as he nuzzled and whispered to her. Avery closed her eyes and fought the hysteria that wanted to break free. If she could just let go and free her mind to take what Kevin wanted so badly to give her everything would be perfect.

  “You are the sexiest woman I’ve seen, honey. Every time I see you I want to touch you. I dreamt about holding your soft body close to mine last night.” His hand smoothed over her tummy, around her hips and then up her sides until he lightly brushed against her breast.

  She craved the contact, the sensation of male hands touching her. Was it so wrong to want to be loved and comforted? Was it wrong to want to be needed by someone? God, she’d needed for so long.

  Kevin brushed her hair away, nipped the junction between her neck and shoulder before sweeping his tongue across her flesh to soothe the sting. Avery heard herself gasp from the sheer pleasure of male contact. As he nibbled and kissed her tender flesh he cupped her breast and stroked her nipple with his thumb. Her body reacted, a slight tingle but nothing more.

  “Don’t stop,” she whispered, hoping he would stroke her into a mindless frenzy that would allow her to escape for a while and see reason clearly. The man she wanted didn’t want her but here, now, this man wanted her. She could give this to herself, to him. “More.”

  “I’ll give you anything you want,” he groaned, turning her around in his arms and pressing his lips to her collarbone.

  Avery tipped her head back as he kissed his way up and down her neck. He pulled her dress until her butt was free and the material bunched at her hips. Squeezing her eyes closed she fought for the pleasure that should be heating her insides, grasped for it and came up empty.

  “More,” she cried desperately. She could do this. If she could let Kevin take her it might free her from the bonds holding her to Ridge. Then, maybe she could give all of herself to Kevin, her heart and soul.

  Frantic, Avery lifted her head and crushed her lips against his, plunging her tongue deep inside his mouth. His tongue stroked against hers before he pulled back and nipped at her lips. His hands gripped her ass, flexed and then smoothed over her plump globes.

  It wasn’t enough. Her body wasn’t on fire for him. She didn’t crave more of his touch but she wanted to. She wanted to go up in flames in his arms. Why wasn’t it happening?

  Shaking, she reached between them, cupped his hard erection through the fabric of his uniform pants and squeezed. He wanted her. It was obvious he wanted her. His hard cock strained at the material. She could do this.

  As she stroked her hand up and down his steel rod she pulled away from the kiss and attacked his neck, licking, biting and kissing his flesh. His erection jerked against her hand as he gripped her ass and lifted her. Avery wrapped her legs around his waist as he moved. She didn’t look to see where he was taking her. It didn’t matter.

  She was going to do this. Kevin would break the hold Ridge had on her, if she could only get her body to respond. When her ass hit the cold countertop she gasped. Kevin held onto her, his arms wrapped tightly around her as she tried to press her nonresponsive clit against his erection.

  “Avery,” he grimaced, trying to pull her away from her.

  She fought against his pulls, desperate for—what? Something. She could do this. It would free her.

  “Avery!” he snapped.

  Frustrated, once again humiliated and embarrassed, she laid her forehead on his shoulder and sobbed. “I can’t do this.”

  Kevin sighed and rubbed his hand up and down her back. He should be shouting at her in frustration. He should be calling her every foul name he could think of. Instead, he let her cry.

  “I’m so sorry. I can’t do this.” The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. He’d been so good to her. Why couldn’t she give him this?

  “I know you can’t,” he said in a thick, husky voice. “I know. It’s okay, honey, I understand.”

  Lifting her head she looked at him through her tears. “How can you understand when I don’t?”

  “Because I care enough to.” He cupped her cheek in his hand. “You would have let me take you even though you didn’t want it, wouldn’t you?”

  “I do want it,” she whined.

  “No, you don’t. I’m not a virgin, honey. I know when a woman wants sex and when she’s going through the motions. I appreciate the try,” he said with a smile.

  A half laugh, half sob erupted from her throat. “You’re so perfect. What’s wrong with me?”

  “I’m not perfect,” he chuckled, wiping away her tears.

  “Well, no, you’re little too pushy but besides that, you’re the perfect man. I must be screwed up in the head.”

  “I’m not pushy,” he protested, chucking her under the chin. “I just have strong opinions on matters and you aren’t screwed up in the head.”

  “I have to be,” she countered. “I’m hung up on a man who wants nothing to do with me and I can’t let him go. Maybe I’m one of those women that gets off on being hurt.” Maybe her mother’s mental illness had passed along to her. Oh joy, she could look forward to wandering around town muttering to herself and threatening kids with her purse.

  “In my line of work I’ve seen dozens of those kinds of women,” Kevin told her. “You are not one of them. You have a history with Gates and somewhere along the line he gave you the reason to hold on.”

  Rolling her eyes, she rested her forehead against his. “After what I pulled in Dover, I wouldn’t blame him if he packed up and left town and I never heard from him again.” Would she ever get over that humiliation? Cale would kick her ass for doing such a thing.

  “Here’s a newsflash for ya, honey. He wouldn’t have been able to go through with it if it turned him off so bad. Unlike you, we can’t go through the motions, if ya know what I mean. Certain vital parts have to be in working order. His obviously were.”

  Oh, his vital parts were working fine that night. Too fine. What did that mean? Did it mean anything? And what about Kevin? His vitals had been ready to rock and roll moments ago.

  “Kevin,” she said hesitantly. “I feel awful about getting you all—” Avery waved her hands around. “And then leaving you hanging.”

  He frowned and then smiled. “You mean this record-breaking hard-on I’ve got going? Lady, if I didn’t know
any better I’d swear you were a witch, ‘cause I’ve never gotten this turned on before. You must have cast a spell on me.”

  “It’s not funny,” she whispered. Doing this to him was cruel and here he was trying to make light of it.

  “I’m okay, Avery,” Kevin said, lifting her face so she could see how serious he was. “Talking about another man with the woman you want is about as effective as a bucket of ice water. The fact that you were trying really, really hard helps stroke the ego a bit. Don’t worry about it. It isn’t the first time I’ve gone home like this.”

  Avery’s mouth dropped open.

  “I remember sneaking up to my bedroom, locking the door and turning up the radio so my sisters and parents couldn’t hear me after several dates with one particular girl. I know how to deal with it.”

  He made her laugh. She could see him as a gawky teenager in his room jerking off into a sock or something. “What happened to this girl?”

  “Oh, she went off to college, met another guy and married him. Last time I saw her she had three kids tagging along and looked happier than I ever saw her. Don’t look so sad,” he warned her. “She deserves to be happy. She had a pretty crappy childhood.”

  Kevin reached around behind her, cupped her bare ass and lifted her off the counter. When her feet hit the floor he stood there, his hands firmly on her butt and holding her against his erection. Guilt flowed through her.

  “I guess I should be going,” he said, resting his chin on top of her head.

  She really didn’t want him to now. Since they cleared the air and neither expected anything more than friendship, she kind of wanted him to stick around and talk.

  “When will I see you again?”

  “Oh, you’ll be seeing plenty of me, honey. I don’t usually give up so easily. I still hold out hope you’ll see the light and cross over to the right side.” His hands smoothed over her ass as he spoke.

  “Kevin, you’re still holding my butt.” She couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face. It seemed strange to smile in the midst of everything happening.

  “Yep, I sure am. A little consolation prize for the loser?” he asked with a sheepish grin on his face.