Don't Tell

by Violet Paige

  “Hey, you owe us forty bucks!”

  I was jerked out of the cloud of lust by a fist slamming a drink bill on the table. I looked up and recognized the guys who sent drinks over when Greer was here.

  Vaughn stood up. I saw his chest rise and just how imposing his frame was. The guys were dwarfed by his broad shoulders and the expanse of his chest.

  “Who the hell are you?” he growled at them.

  “She owes us money.” They pointed at me in unison. I could smell the beer on their breath.

  I shrank in my chair, shaking my head. “I-I didn’t ask for the drinks.”

  Vaughn wedged himself between the angry assholes and my chair. “Take your bill and fucking pay it.” He grabbed it from the table and shoved it the closest one’s hands.

  I swallowed. What was happening?

  “I can pay it,” I whispered.

  He looked down at me. “I’ve got this.” His voice was rough and commanding. Holy shit.

  I nodded.

  “We’ll pay it with your credit card.” The idiot didn’t seem to realize who he was facing. I knew enough to put my wager on Vaughn.

  Vaughn straightened his shoulders. “Let’s make things very clear here.” He looked at each of them. “Take your check. Take your fucking attitudes. Take your asses back to where you came from. She’s not paying.” With each word his voice grew lower and by the time he was finished speaking the jerks had leaned forward to listen intently.

  I waited for them to retaliate, but instead they backed up and returned to the bar, exchanging dirty looks at us over their shoulders.

  Vaughn cleared his throat and sat down.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “You didn’t have to do that,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure who around us had seen the exchange.

  “I did have to do that. You didn’t deserve it. And I wasn’t going to put up with those dicks treating you like shit.”

  I needed to steady my breath. The adrenaline was pumping through me. I’d never had someone stand up for me like that. It had to be the sexiest thing I’d ever experienced. Was he real?

  I saw his shoulders relax.

  “And I thought you had given up bar fights.”

  There was a naughty gleam in his eye. “That wasn’t a fight, sweetheart. You should really see me fight.”

  The shiver running through me was wicked. He was right. He hadn’t laid a finger on either of them, yet the testosterone was dripping from his posture, his voice, his eyes.

  “You wouldn’t have let it get that far though, right?” I didn’t know why I was questioning him. Would I have walked away if he had decked one of them? Would I be any less turned on by how he defended me? Was I worried that maybe he had once been involved in something illegal?

  “I take things as far as I want.” His voice was low and even. “I set the limits. Always.”

  There was an edge to Vaughn. On the outside he was calm, but there was a barrier he was willing to break through.

  “Thank you.” I grinned.

  “Not a problem.” He winked. “Anytime.” He checked over his shoulders and smiled when he saw the douchebags paying the tab.

  “All right. So back to you. You were telling me about your move here.”

  “Was I?” I couldn’t think of anything before Vaughn stood in front of me like a protective wall. The moment I actually enjoyed being the rescued damsel.

  “Yes. Boxes and a new job,” he reminded me. His eyebrows rose playfully.

  “Can you believe I haven’t made it to the White House yet for a tour?”

  “Sounds like you’re a busy woman right now.”

  I placed my empty glass on the table. “I’m trying to get my bearings.”

  He leaned forward and I inhaled deeply, trying to memorize the way he smelled. It might be the last time I inhaled a man so intoxicating.

  “Maybe when you get settled in, I’ll give you a call. Dinner sometime? Maybe I can take you to the White House.”

  I met his eyes head on. His question sounded like a promise, but he was giving me an out. A chance to postpone things. There was something about Vaughn that excited me. He was gorgeous as hell, but there was more to him than that. I didn’t think I could define it, especially not this close to him. Words were jumbled and fuzzy.

  “I-I…” I scolded myself for not getting it together more quickly. “Yes. I’m free this weekend. I’d love to see the city.”

  Truth was I was always free. My calendar was wide open. Greer was my only lifeline here and she didn’t have time to give me between the demands of her job and Preston. I wasn’t anxious to have another night of being the third wheel, or pretending like I wanted to know Preston any better than I did.

  He looked down at the solid watch on his wrist, it glinted under the lights. “It’s getting late.” He didn’t use his phone to check the time.

  He stood from the table. “Let me walk you outside and make sure you get a cab.”

  I wasn’t ready to go, but I had clinic in the morning, and something about his words made it seem as if I was supposed to follow him outside.

  I found myself being led through the bar with his palm on the small of my back. His hands were wide and firm, pressing his fingertips into my skin with a possessive touch. We stepped outside and I heard the noises of Georgetown filter around us. Somewhere in the distance a dog barked. A car honked as it rolled past us, setting off a chain reaction.

  Vaughn whistled as one of the taxis slowed in front of the bar. I stepped toward the curb.

  For the first time all day it didn’t feel sweltering outside. There was a warm breeze that wisped over my skin. The city felt different at night—there was an air of romance in the history of the buildings surrounding us. A couple walked by holding hands. I scooted closer to Vaughn.

  “Thank you for the drink.” I was close enough to smell the juniper on his skin. God, he smelled incredible.

  “Thank you for plowing into me.” He winked.

  He opened the door to the car, but I hesitated.

  “And thank you for earlier. For handling that situation.” I wanted to tell him how hot and heroic I thought it was, but he didn’t seem like the kind of guy who wanted it to be a big deal.

  “Oh wait. You need my number.” I felt silly giving it to him, but there was no way I was riding off without a way to hear from him again.

  He pulled the phone from my hands and typed his digits into my messages and hit send. His phone beeped.

  “Got it.” He smiled, returning the phone to me. I dropped it into the straw bag.

  “Okay. So…” I wanted to say something cute and flirty. Something memorable. Something that wouldn’t let him forget me, but before I had a chance his hands slid to the side of my face.

  I stopped trying to talk or think.

  His eyes locked on mine and I saw the glimpse of a smile as his mouth lowered to mine. My eyes closed as I surrendered to his kiss.

  His warm lips moved over mine with tender firmness. Vaughn wasn’t hesitant or shy. He was in control as his thumb stroked my cheek. I forgot we were standing on the sidewalk in front of a cab. I forgot about the guys in the bar. I forgot about the loneliness from the day.

  My body yielded to the rush of pleasure from this stranger’s lips, blistering my mouth with passion. I sighed lightly as his tongue twirled against mine. My hands cupped the back of his neck, lingering in the kiss. Losing myself in the moment.

  The wind picked up the edge of my skirt and I heard a group of girls giggle as they walked by. I didn’t care. I didn’t want anything to spoil the magic of this sliver of happiness. Somehow my feet didn’t hurt anymore. I didn’t care that I didn’t know my way home. The day suddenly wasn’t so crappy anymore.

  The world fell away while we stood next to the cab, breathing each other in.

  Vaughn’s hands slipped from my face. He stole another kiss before breaking away completely.

  I fought to catch my breath as he shuttled me into the b
ackseat. My lips were reeling. My head. My chest. I was on fire.

  “Nice to meet you, Emily.” He smiled wickedly and closed the door.

  The cab pulled away from the sidewalk and I finally exhaled as I watched Vaughn fade from view.

  3

  The next morning the alarm on my phone buzzed incessantly until I knocked it to the floor.

  I ran my fingers over my lips and smiled. It was an epic kiss. The kiss to beat all kisses. Maybe it was the romance of the city lights, or because Vaughn had defended me when we barely knew each other. Maybe it was just because he was hot as hell and anything from his lips was going to be amazing.

  I shuffled to the bathroom to start the shower.

  It didn’t appear as if Greer had come home last night. I peeked my head into the living room. Preston had been right. Things must have been serious at the capitol and she ended up staying at his place.

  We hadn’t come up with a system like we had in college. It wasn’t as if I had anywhere else to go, but maybe we could at least start texting each other if we weren’t going to sleep in the apartment.

  I brushed my teeth before stepping into the rush of hot water. I looked at my feet as the water trickled down to the drain. There was no way I could wear a pair of heels today even if I wanted to.

  I thought more about last night. I thought about meeting Vaughn. I wanted to talk to Greer. I didn’t know how I would describe him to her. Hot, cocky, mysterious, and … I tried to think of something that would explain the effect he had on me over a drink.

  There was an instant attraction I felt. The whole dizzy, reckless, trembling rush was there. I could picture his face. The way he stared into my eyes.

  This was crazy. One drink. One kiss. That was it and he was already taking up head space.

  I dried off and got dressed for work. I slid my feet into a pair of Keds and tucked my patent ballet flats into my messenger bag. I smiled, feeling as if I had accomplished a small victory before I even left the apartment. I swore to myself today was not going to suck.

  I searched the kitchen cabinets for a coffee cylinder and lid. I tested a few to make sure they didn’t leak. After I made a pot of coffee I poured it inside, sealing it tightly.

  I already felt better as I descended the stairs to the street. It was a quick walk to the Metro and only one stop to Tenleytown. The jitters from yesterday were gone. The helpless feeling of being lost had evaporated.

  I climbed onto the Metro, knowing I should stand close to the door.

  As soon as the train slowed I exited and headed for the escalators. The noise didn’t seem quite as deafening in the tunnel. I held my ground and secured a place on the steps. Today I wasn’t going to be knocked to the side.

  A few minutes later I was on campus and walking toward the clinic.

  I paused in front of the double doors as soon as I heard my phone buzz.

  I reached into the messenger bag. My stomach dropped.

  “Mom?”

  “Emily, thank God.” I could hear the crack in her voice as if she had been crying.

  “What’s wrong? What happened?” I looked for a place to sit as people walked into the building.

  “I can’t find Garrett.”

  “Can’t find him? What do you mean? It’s early.”

  “Have you heard from him?” she asked. “Did he call you this morning?”

  I hadn’t spoken to my brother since I arrived in D.C. He was still angry I had left. He had threatened not to speak to me again.

  “No. Mom, tell me what’s going on? Why isn’t he at the house?” I pressed.

  She sighed. “We had an argument last night about his treatment. It ended when he locked himself in his room. When I knocked on the door this morning he wasn’t there.”

  “Maybe he went out for a run,” I suggested.

  My brother used to be an amazing runner. He’d won all-state in track when he was in high school. But now he used running as an escape from the constant therapy. It was his self-prescribed medication. This wasn’t the first time my mom hadn’t been able to find him.

  “He isn’t out for a run,” she snapped.

  “Did you call dad?”

  She sighed. “He doesn’t know anything. He never helps. Worthless.”

  I closed my eyes. The instinct was there. I could feel it tugging at me, urging me to do something. To jump back into the cycle that was my brother’s toxic pattern.

  He’d take his medication for a month or two and then think he was better and stop without telling anyone. That’s when he started doing erratic things. Hanging out with his ex-girlfriend again. Blowing through my mom’s money.

  I couldn’t stay and watch it happen over and over. I had been sucked into my brother’s problems our entire life. He needed more than weekly counseling and a doctor who doled out prescriptions every time one ran out.

  But my mom refused to do anything more proactive. My dad didn’t give a shit anymore. And I was emotionally exhausted watching his illness tear my family in half.

  I heard the bells chime from the clock tower. I had to get inside.

  “Mom, I’ll call him later. When I get a break at lunch I’ll check online and see if he’s posted anything. Okay?”

  “That’s it?” I could hear the hurt in her voice.

  I sighed. “I’m walking into a client meeting. It’s my first one. I can’t drop everything and try to help you find him. He’s okay. He always is.” But in the back of my head I knew there was no way to be sure. It’s what I told myself. It’s what I told Mom every time Garrett did this.

  “And what if he’s not?” she pleaded.

  “Then, there isn’t anything I can do.” I spoke quietly. I hated saying it, but it was true. What could I do to force my brother to take his meds? How could I make him keep his therapy appointments? How did I convince him that he had to face his illness?

  “Fine.” Her voice was clipped. The crying had stopped. “I’ll talk to you at lunch.”

  “I’m sorry, Mom. I hope you hear something. He’ll be back soon. Try not to worry.”

  I hung up the phone and took a deep breath. I walked inside, pausing at the doors to change shoes. My office was at the end of the hall. I had a few steps to collect myself and try not to think about what kind of trouble my brother had gotten into this time.

  I pushed open the wooden door. There was a woman sitting in the waiting room.

  “Hi.” I smiled at her.

  The clerk waved at me. “Your first appointment is here.”

  “Oh. All right. I need just a minute.” I shared an office with another resident. She hadn’t arrived.

  Yesterday during the orientation I received her name, but we hadn’t met.

  I walked through the waiting area and into my office. I settled behind one of the desks and turned on the laptop the university had given me. The fan churned inside and I felt the warm air blow over my fingers.

  I needed these few stolen seconds to remind myself why I was here. In the waiting room was a woman who needed my help. A woman who couldn’t afford legal help, but needed it. I was here to do something meaningful and rich with my life. I could help people. I couldn’t help Garrett, or my mom to see what he did to everyone, but there were people here who needed me. People who would listen. People who would respect my advice. Who sought it.

  I could do something here my family had stolen from me. Garrett had ruined too many things. My parents were divorced. They still argued. They couldn’t be in the same room together. There was no peace or calm.

  This was my chance to find something centered on my own. I needed this to work in a way they couldn’t understand. They thrived in chaos. It was drowning me.

  I used to panic like my mother. I’d comb the streets. I’d call all his friends. I wouldn’t sleep. Sometimes I didn’t eat. If he was gone more than a day, I didn’t go to work. I was the only one who accepted the offer for family counseling sessions.

  Her name was Beth. My counselor was the same ag
e I was. She said I didn’t have to call her Dr. Lane. I knew she didn’t have much experience, but I was desperate for a way to breathe. For a way out of the dark spiral that sucked me in to Garrett’s choices.

  I didn’t need sage wisdom, or years of advanced degrees. All I needed was someone to listen. Someone to steer my ship out of the storm. Beth encouraged me to pursue American and Greer’s offer.

  During our last session I sat across from her while she scribbled something on a clipboard.

  Beth looked at me. “Is there anything you want to discuss before you leave?”

  It was more open-ended than her usual questions. “No.”

  She smiled. “Are you sure? You seemed to hesitate.”

  “I-I don’t know if I’ll ever stop feeling guilty,” I admitted.

  “Guilty? Because you’re moving and have accepted a job?”

  I shook my head. “No. Because I’m leaving them.”

  She let her pen drop to the paper and leaned forward. “You have the right to be happy, Emily. You deserve to be fulfilled in your life.” She paused. “And you can always come home to visit. You can call and text.” She eyed me. “But not too much.”

  I sighed. That was the catch. How did I set boundaries? How did I find balance when no one else but me wanted it?

  “And when that doesn’t work?” I asked.

  “I think it will. I think you’ll be surprised how a little distance will free you.”

  Beth had been partly right. I tried to use all of the relaxation techniques she taught me. I closed my eyes, expecting to see a picture of the beach, or a sunny green field, but instead I saw the sexy lust-filled smirk on Vaughn’s face.

  My eyes popped open. That was not a meditative thought. I scolded myself. What the hell? I returned to my breathing, but my focus was gone. Vaughn had invaded my quiet space.

  “Meg, send her in,” I called through the door to the clerk. I needed more than a distraction from my family drama.

  I dove into the one thing that always made my mind focus—the law.

  As promised I used my lunch break to check in with Garret. My call went to his voicemail. He hadn’t bothered to set up a message.