Secrets and Lies

by Annie Jocoby

So, I wasn’t at all sure that I was pregnant, and I hoped and prayed that I wasn’t. Not that I didn’t want Luke’s child. Of course I did, even though both of us were still very young and neither of us was established. I still had faith that everything would work out for Luke and his career, and that this criminal charge would be resolved as soon as Luke and I could prove that Nottingham is a freak who essentially got somebody to beat the crap out of him just so that he could frame Luke. I also had faith that I would be able to get my own career on track. I had started up with my painting when I was on vacation with Luke, and I was finding, once again, that I was getting my voice back. I could envision my future with Luke, and it would be filled with commercial success for both of us. So, supporting a child wouldn’t be a problem, soon.

  But the specter of Nottingham, and how much crap he was going to put me through if I were pregnant, made me pause. It would break my heart, absolutely break it in two, if I had to surreptitiously terminate my pregnancy, especially since the baby probably would be Luke’s, not Nottingham’s. If it were Nottingham’s, I would be far enough along that it would show up on a pregnancy test. So, that gave me comfort. But terminating Luke’s baby...I didn’t know if I could go through with it. I didn’t know if I could live with myself if I did that. But, then again, could I live with myself if I brought a child into this world who would be claimed by Nottingham? The baby would legally be Nottingham’s, after all, as the conception was during the marriage. A DNA test would certainly prove that Nottingham wasn’t the father, but I knew that Nottingham would still have rights to the baby, and would fight it every day in court if he had to.

  I shivered, thinking about my choices, and said a silent prayer that I was only coming down with something. I wanted a baby with Luke, but not until I was officially divorced from Nottingham, so that there could be zero question that Nottingham could never be a part of the child’s life.

  You can’t think about this right now, Dalilah. You have to think about the more immediate situation of making sure Luke stays out of prison. As crappy as I felt, I knew that I was going to have to get ahold of Serena and see what she could do to help us in finding out information about Nottingham. So, this was next – after I got up from my rest, I would give her a call.

  After just a few minutes, though, I started to feel better. Less queasy, less fatigued. I realized that I really just needed to lie down, and that a nap wasn’t even in order. So, I got out my phone, where I had entered Serena’s contact information, and looked it up and dialed.

  “Dalilah,” Serena said on the second ring. “I was hoping you’d call.”

  “Yes,” I said, feeling guilty that I was calling her for a favor. She obviously sounded like she was eager to talk to me. “Listen, I don’t want you to think that I’m only calling you because I need something. It just so happens that I do, though.”

  “Sure,” she said. “What do you need, Dalilah?”

  “Um, can we meet for a drink somewhere? I don’t think that I’m going to bring Luke just yet, though. I know that you guys have to mend fences.”

  “Yeah,” she said. “Where?”

  “In your neck of the woods,” I said, thinking, accurately, that it would be more than rude to have her come to Brooklyn, when she was the one who was going to do us the favor. “How about Gotham’s tomorrow at 6?”

  “Gotham’s it is,” she said. “I’m happy to hear from you, Dalilah.”

  “Well, I’m glad to be calling. Although you might not be so thrilled when I ask you what I need.”

  “I’m on pins and needles to find out,” she said. “See you tomorrow.”

  I went out into the kitchen, where Luke was sketching in his book while sitting on the floor. I knew that he did that to relax, and his painting came better when he was already under less stress. He stood up when he saw me. “You feeling okay, honey?” At that, he got up and poured some hot water into a cup. “Here’s some tea with honey and ginger. My mom always made this for me when I was feeling crappy.”

  I smiled and took the proffered cup. “I’m fine, really. Just have a little bug, I guess. Hope I don’t give it to you.”

  “Well, if you do, you do. Anyhow....”

  “I got ahold of Serena. We’re meeting at Gotham’s tomorrow evening.”

  Luke nodded. “As much as I don’t like the idea of my sister getting involved in this, I suppose you’re right. Serena might be valuable to us in this investigation. Sorry for giving you a hard time about her earlier.”

  “Not a problem. All that I ask is that you have an open mind about her.”

  “I’ll try. It’s going to be difficult to overcome a lifetime of her disappointing and hurting me and the entire family, but, at the same time, I really would like to think the best about her. If you found her good side, then I’m all for trying to get to know her in a new light.”

  I was a bit taken aback by Luke’s change of attitude, but I realized that he seemed a great deal calmer than he earlier did. I supposed that he had the chance to really think things through, and realized that, with his freedom on the line, he probably shouldn’t look any gift horse in the mouth.

  “Okay, then, I’m glad to hear that. I do want to talk to her alone, though. I hope that’s not a problem.”

  “No, I understand. I mean, we aren’t the best of friends just yet. As stupid as it sounds, as this is my case, I probably would be the in the way right now.”

  I sipped my tea, and found that I did feel better. I looked at Luke, wanting so bad to tell him my suspicions about the fact that I felt like I could be pregnant. But I really needed to see a family law attorney first. Lay everything on the table, and see what I could expect. See if there was any way for me to cleanly divorce Nottingham if I was expecting a child, although I knew in my gut, and intellectually as well, that that would be asking way too much.

  “Ah, well,” Luke said. “I think that it’s time for bed. Let’s pull out the futon and hit the hay. I have to work early tomorrow a double shift.”

  The two of us then got naked, and got under the covers. Luke stroked my body gently, and my minor queasiness was forgotten. His touch was still so magical to me, and I kissed him eagerly. He took a deep breath and got on top of me and entered me. I threw back my head in ecstasy, not wanting it to end. I put my hands behind his head and brought his face down to mine. His soft lips were gently brushing mine as I felt him stroking in and out. Then he groaned softly and rolled over. “Sorry that was a quickie,” he said. “I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise.”

  I didn’t care. I orgasmed as usual. That was one thing about Luke – he could make me orgasm with just the slightest gentle touch. I didn’t think that I could ever be as captivated by another person. And I knew how much stress he was under. Everything was hitting him at once – the felony charges, the fact that nobody from his show would return his calls, and going back to work. I really looked forward to the day when everything was resolved and we could get our lives back on track.

  But would it be resolved? If I were pregnant, that would definitely put a huge wrench into the entire thing. So, as I lay there in Luke’s strong arms, I looked up to the sky and silently said a prayer to the one that I believed in sometimes, other times not, that I wasn’t pregnant. I figured it couldn’t hurt to pray, even if I didn’t necessarily believe, because there was always the off-chance that there was something there who would hear me and make sure that my wishes were answered.

  Chapter 46

  While Luke worked his shifts at the bar, I caught the subway into the city and met Serena at Gotham’s Bar and Grill in the Village. This was not a typical bar and grill, at least what I used to always think of when I thought of bars and grills. Rather, it was more like a nice restaurant, with white tablecloths, and a gorgeous tiled floor. The enormous windows looked out into the city life, and the ceilings, like so many other finer restaurants and drinking establishments, were a good 20 feet high.

  Serena was already there, and stood up when I cam
e through the door. She was dressed casually in black pants and a green sweater, with an Hermés bag that matched her red fingernails. I went over to her, and she gave me a hug. I wondered, as I sat down across from her, how it was that everybody was so wrong about this woman. I saw her as beautiful woman with a hard shell, and, behind this hard shell, was this innocent and hurt child. Everybody else in her life only saw the shell, I guessed.

  I took a deep breath as the waiter came around for my drink order. “I’d like a glass of sparkling water,” I said, handing him back his menu.

  Serena narrowed her eyes. “I knew it. How far along are you?”

  I sighed. “I have no idea. I mean, not far along enough that it shows up on a pregnancy stick. And how did you know?”

  She put her hand to mouth. “You mean, aside from the fact that you looked like a sheet at my old man’s house, and puked your guts out when I first met you?”

  I smiled. “Touché.”

  “No, seriously. I’m sensitive. I can sense things. See things that others can’t. You used to have that ability, too, when you were a kid. But you don’t use that so much anymore, do you?”

  I thought about her words. When I was very small, I did know things that others didn’t. But that was a normal thing with kids, and it was something that I thought that I outgrew. Maybe I didn’t, though, which was why I was always able to see behind a person’s eyes and façade and understand what was going on underneath. And I wondered if that was the real reason why Serena took to me so quickly. She recognized somebody who was “sensitive” like herself, even if I didn’t necessarily still acknowledge it in my own self.

  I smiled. “I guess you’re right. As you know, I used to make quite a lot of money as a portraitist. I did that when I was a kid, but my other passion was in the genre of urban expressionism. But I was very good at the portraits because I was able to paint their inner soul. At least, that’s what they always said. No matter how they seemed on the outside, I saw what was roiling beneath, and that was what I painted. I was unique in that way.”

  She nodded her head and sipped her wine. “You really should tap into that more, Dalilah. I can help you do that. It would be a shame if you went through the rest of your life ignoring your god-given abilities.”

  I felt uncomfortable hearing her talk like that, but I had no idea why that was. I guess because I didn’t want to feel like a freak, and acknowledging that maybe I did have another sense that was underdeveloped would do just that. “Yes, Serena, maybe you can help me with that.”

  She looked skeptical. “Alright, I won’t push. But you wanted to talk to me about Luke, I guess. He’s in trouble, isn’t he?”

  I blinked my eyes, knowing that I didn’t specify why I wanted to see her. How did she know that I wanted to see her about Luke’s troubles? “How did your entire family never know about your abilities?”

  She shrugged. “My dad always shunned me because of what I could see and sense. So, I kept quiet about it. My family hated me, anyhow, for good reason. I always was a brat. Acting out, though, but nobody could ever hear me. They didn’t want to, so I had no use for any of them.”

  I took her hands. “Serena, this might all be fate. My meeting you, and you helping us. It might be the way that you and your brother can mend fences, and maybe he can talk to the rest of the family about doing the same.”

  I saw tears forming in her eyes, and she swallowed hard and took a sip of her wine. Then she took a deep breath and said “so, beautiful lady, what is it that you need from me?”

  “Augh. Well, I hope that this isn’t inappropriate. But, desperate times call for desperate measures.” I then told her the entire story about Nottingham, from the beginning until the very latest developments. She followed along silently, nodding from time to time.

  “Wow,” she said, after I finished. By that time, she was on her second glass of wine, and we had decided to go ahead and order dinner. “You guys certainly have gone through a lot. I can’t believe that you would put yourself out there with that creeper, just to help Luke. I hope he appreciates you.”

  “He does. I appreciate him, too.”

  She nodded. “Well, let’s see. You said that you have a good feeling that he belongs to the Rose Club?”

  “Not positive, but I think so. At least, that was what I understood from people in the know.”

  She flattened her mouth and took another drink of her wine. “I’m afraid that I would be of little use, there. That’s a very exclusive club, and you have to be invited to be a member. Which I’m not. I go to Eve’s myself. Little bit less hardcore.”

  I felt deflated, thinking that this entire idea wasn’t going to pan out. I didn’t quite know what to do, except maybe talk to James and see if he had any ideas about issuing subpoenas or something of the sort. But I didn’t know if that were even possible, because this entire thing was based upon a hunch to begin with.

  She patted my hands. “All isn’t lost. Don’t look like that.” She smiled. “Listen, if you don’t mind doing something slightly illegal....no, sorry, very illegal. But, anyhow, I happen to have some fake police badges that we could all use. We go in there like we own the place – that’s the key to getting the information you want, you gotta be confident and not back down – and we start shaking everybody down. We’ll find the dom who roughed up that creeper in no time. Listen, that place is underground – they don’t want any trouble. Once we find who we’re looking for, it’s just a matter of threatening subpoenas and legal action, and they’ll give us what we need. An authorized statement would probably do, wouldn’t it?”

  I brightened. “Yes. That would certainly be a start. I don’t know what James, Luke’s attorney, would need to present to the prosecutor’s office, but I would imagine that a notarized statement would probably be some pretty good evidence.” I cocked my head at her while I sipped my water. “You sound like you’ve done this kind of thing before.”

  “You’d be surprised at the things I’ve done. Let’s just say that if you need something done, and you don’t mind doing things extra-legally, I’m probably your girl. And, in your case, I would think that extra-legal would be the way to go.”

  I knew that. I had consumed enough legal books in my life to know that a subpoena of this place, without some kind of probable cause, would be quashed. And a hunch, which is what I was working with, wasn’t probable cause for such a search, so I doubted that James would be able to get the information that we needed in this case. And, as secretive as a place like this was, it was going to be exceedingly difficult to do things above-board.

  I felt reasonably confident that Serena was going to be able to get what we needed.

  “Okay,” I said. “So, let’s do it. I don’t want to ask where you got those badges, though.”

  “No, you probably shouldn’t. Just know that they look really authentic, and they work every time.”

  “Is it going to look okay that there’s three of us going in there?”

  She shook her head. “Actually, no. I was going to tell you that. Probably just Luke and I should do it. Sorry about that, but these places are used to seeing one or two cops at a time. But three would be overkill, and I don’t think that we need to draw attention needlessly.”

  “Agreed,” I said, feeling a little bit disappointed that I wouldn’t be able to come along, but I understood, at the same time. “I hope that you guys can do this together without wanting to kill each other.”

  Serena smiled. “I know what you mean. But his ass is on the line, and, besides, I feel that I probably owe him this much. It’s time to make amends, and this will probably help that along.”

  “Of course, Luke is going to have to wear some kind of disguise. I mean, he can’t be recognized. You never know, the case might come to trial, so we certainly can’t have the people from that club looking at him and saying ‘say, you look like that cop who came in here investigating us.’ I imagine that wouldn’t be such a good idea.”

  Serena nodded her he
ad. “He’ll wear a cap, thick glasses and a beard and moustache. That should be good enough. Good thinking, there, Dalilah. You probably are going to end up saving his ass, too.”

  We clinked our glasses and ate our food, which had just arrived. I knew that Luke probably wasn’t going to be entirely comfortable doing this with his sister, but he was just going to have to get over it.

  Chapter 47

  Luke

  I was sitting in the front seat of Serena’s Porsche, in my disguise, feeling like a total idiot for going to this Rose Club in the West Village. That morning, Dalilah broke the news to me that Serena and I would be going to this place, and I was apprehensive, to say the least. Not just because I was going to do something that was clearly illegal – impersonating a police officer – but also because I had to spend the evening with Serena.

  “She doesn’t bite,” Dalilah said, as she put the beard and moustache on me, not to mention makeup. She gave me some enormous glasses and baseball cap with a large brim, and smiled, satisfied. “Now put on your big boy pants and do it.”

  Which was how I found myself in the car with Serena, heading to this fetish club. “Now,” I said. “We’re agreed that if this Nottingham happens to be there, we leave immediately, right?”

  “Well, I’m thinking about that one,” she said. “He doesn’t know me, so maybe I just keep on going and you high-tail it out.” She looked at me. “Don’t be so nervous, kid. It’s going to be fine.”

  “Easy for you to say. You’re not the one who’s out on bail. I’m sure that impersonating a police officer would probably be one of those things that would get my bond revoked. Call me crazy.”

  She sighed. “You know, you always called Mark the cop, but I think that you have more than a little cop in you, too. Lighten up. As I said to Dalilah, you have to walk in there like you own the place. You can’t be intimidated and embarrassed. You have to act like a real undercover detective would. No shaking, and you have to look everybody in the eye.”