First Love (Soulmates #4)

by Hazel Kelly

  And it wasn’t just the sex I fell in love with. It was the way he looked at me before and after, his eyes drinking me in like I was a unicorn shrouded in mist.

  He was the only boy that ever made me feel that way, like my quirks and body were unique. Even I looked at my body differently after that summer, and I had him to thank for that.

  It was as if his attention woke me up to my own strength.

  But he was a man now, a man that would probably do a whole lot more than kiss me if I let him.

  And as opposed to the idea as I’d been before our date, something in me had shifted while we were out on the water.

  Maybe it was thinking about my dad and realizing how fleeting life could be. Or perhaps it was realizing that Adam was one of the good guys and that I’d be a fool to turn away the affection he wanted to show me.

  Whatever it was, my interest in getting to know him better was now outshining my desire to keep him at a distance, and the only issue I had with that development was the fact that I couldn’t wipe the goddamn smile off my face.

  What’s more, the good feelings swirling inside me, which had been awakened by a mere kiss as if I were living in a fucking fairy tale, were affecting more than just my relations with my employer.

  They were softening me, softening me so much I decided to start having coffee in the mornings with my mom again.

  “So how’s it going?” she asked, as if I hadn’t been avoiding her for weeks.

  “How’s what going?”

  She made her way over with our favorite mugs. “Work.”

  “Good,” I said, laying out two reed coasters. “We’ve been implementing some exciting changes that I think will have a positive impact on the hotel’s earning potential going forward.”

  “That’s nice to hear,” she said, sitting in the chair across the table.

  “The new furniture in the lobby looks fantastic for one thing,” I said. “It’s made the hotel feel really fresh and welcoming.”

  She nodded.

  “And we’ve been adding new activities for the guests to enjoy.”

  “Oh?” She raised her eyebrows. “Like what?”

  “Like Gia’s started teaching water aerobics three mornings a week, and it’s had an instant effect on the vibe at the pool since the mothers are getting to know each other better.”

  “Wow.”

  “And we’re going to have a sand castle contest on Fourth of July weekend followed by a barbeque so people will stay and spend money when the contest is over.”

  “That sounds wonderful.”

  I nodded and slid my mug towards me.

  “And what about Adam?” she asked.

  I swallowed.

  “Has the staff warmed to him okay?”

  “Yeah, he’s great,” I said as casually as I could. “Best of all, he’s convinced everyone to take on more responsibility while somehow convincing them that it was their idea.”

  She squinted.

  “It’s complicated,” I said. “But trust me. Whatever he’s doing is working and the staff seem happier than ever.”

  She pressed her thin lips together and blinked. “Does this mean you forgive me?”

  “There’s nothing to forgive.”

  She cocked her head. “That’s not true, honey. You were right to be upset, and I’ve been dealing with a lot of guilt over the decision I made to sell the place.”

  I looked at her bare face. It seemed to be aging so much faster since my dad’s passing. “You don’t need to feel guilty, Mom.”

  “I can’t help it.”

  I reached forward and put a hand over hers. “I understand why you made the choice that you did, and the hotel is going to be better for it.”

  Her eyes searched mine. “You really think so?”

  “I know so,” I said, squeezing her hand. “And that’s all that really matters.” I pulled my hand back and wrapped it around my mug. “I thought you were giving up on the hotel when you sold it, but I realize now that you were doing what you had to in order to save it.”

  Her eyes watered. “Thanks, Jolie. It means a lot to me that you understand.”

  “Of course.”

  She took a deep breath.

  “Sorry I can’t stay,” I said. “I have to cover for Gia during her class.”

  “Before you go-” She pushed herself back from the table and stood up. “A package came for you this morning.”

  “A package?” I furrowed my brow and downed the rest of my coffee.

  She walked to the front of the house and returned a moment later with what looked like an extra long shoe box. “You didn’t order this?”

  I shook my head as I took it from her, but deep down in my guts, I knew there was only one person it could be from. “Thanks,” I said, opening the door.

  “You’re not going to open it now?” she asked, her disappointment obvious.

  “I can’t,” I lied. “I’ll be late.” I gave her a kiss on the cheek and hurried to my car where it was parked in the street. As soon as I sat inside, I sliced the brown tape with my car key and slid the box open.

  There was a colorful kite inside, and according to the picture on the outside of the clear package, it would look like a giant seahorse when it was flying.

  When I freed it from the box, a small envelope fell onto my lap. I laid the kite on the passenger seat and turned my attention to the note.

  Inside, a card held a message printed in a mysterious little font.

  Here’s a clue

  For date number two

  If you can’t find me in the dunes,

  Use the kite & I’ll find you xx

  Chapter 26: Adam

  I was sitting on a blanket in the dugout dune looking for a flying seahorse when Jolie appeared in the path between the sea oats.

  “Well, well, well,” she said, cocking her hip. “What do we have here?”

  “You found me,” I said, sitting up.

  She was in a little black sundress that had a gold zipper running all the way up to a hint of cleavage.

  “I was starting to lose hope.”

  “I can’t believe you found this place again,” she said, dropping to her knees at the edge of the blanket and setting the kite down beside her.

  “Of course I did,” I said, moving the small cooler and takeout bag so she’d have more room.

  “Another picnic?” she asked, kicking her legs out to the side.

  “Is that okay with you?” I asked, unzipping the fabric cooler and pulling out two beers. “I get kind of sick of fancy restaurants.”

  She raised her eyebrows.

  “Okay,” I said, popping the caps off the beers. “I realize how that sounded.”

  “It’s fine,” she said. “I like picnics.”

  I passed her a bottle.

  “Thanks,” she said, clinking it against mine.

  “The menu’s not as varied as last time,” I said, passing the paper bag over to her as I took a sip of beer.

  She opened it and looked inside, her face lighting up when she saw the familiar cardboard containers. “You got Nino’s calzones?”

  “I hope that’s cool. I know you eat them all the time, but-”

  “It’s more than cool,” she said, removing one of the boxes. “It’s a wonderful surprise.”

  “I haven’t actually had one yet.”

  She furrowed her brow. “What the heck have you been eating? This is the best takeout within a hundred miles of here.”

  I shrugged. “I think I’ve had the Harmony Bay Club Sandwich seven hundred times.”

  She laughed.

  “To be honest, though, I was hoping the calzone wouldn’t be my only first of the night.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, pulling some plastic cutlery out of the bag and handing me a fork and knife.

  I pulled a small lantern from the cooler and lit the candle inside it.

  “Fancy,” she said, cutting the corner off her calzone.

  “I try,” I
said, setting it beside us. It was a bit early for candlelight, but the sky over the ocean was already getting darker, and the soft yellow glow overhead would be gone within the hour.

  “So what other first did you have in mind?” she asked, her eyes flashing up at me as she took another bite.

  “Remember the first time we were here?”

  She pulled her long hair in front of one shoulder. “I do.”

  I broke the corner off my calzone. “Remember how we were going to go skinny dipping?”

  She licked her lips. “I remember what we did instead.”

  “Well, I’ve still never done that.”

  She squinted at me. “What do you mean you’ve never done that?”

  “I’ve never been skinny dipping.”

  She took a sip of beer. “How is that even possible?”

  “It just hasn’t happened,” I said, letting my eyes follow the thin straps of her sandals from her ankle to where they were tied halfway up her tanned shins. “I almost did once.”

  “What happened?”

  “I was on a Grecian Island with some friends-”

  She nodded as she chewed.

  “And right when I was stripped down with one foot in the water, one of my friends started screaming like a banshee.”

  She covered her full mouth. “Why?”

  “He stepped on a sea urchin.”

  She scrunched her face. “Oh dear.”

  “Needless to say, I did a one eighty.”

  “Understandable.”

  “So what do you think?” I asked, popping some calzone in my mouth.

  “I’m not sure,” she said. “To be honest, I’m a little confused.”

  “Why?”

  “I thought we were starting over, but it kind of sounds like you want to relive some childhood fantasy.”

  “It’s more like I consider skinny dipping a bucket list item, and since it’s unfinished business that I had with you, I thought we might finish what we started.”

  Her eyes flashed up at me. “I think you’re just trying to get me naked.”

  My mouth curled into a smile. “Is it that obvious?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

  “And what if I say yes?” she asked. “What if I say yes and you’re disappointed because nothing is how you remembered it?”

  “Is that a joke?”

  “No. It’s a serious question.”

  “Have you gotten something pierced that you want to tell me about?” I asked.

  “No, but I did get a tattoo a few years ago.”

  “Of what?” I asked.

  “You don’t know?”

  I shook my head. “How could I?”

  “You really have no idea?”

  “Should I know?” I asked. “Is it something obvious?”

  She cocked her head.

  “Like a paddle board or the sun or a dolphin or some shit?”

  “No,” she said, fixing her eyes on mine. “It’s a seahorse.”

  “You’re joking.”

  She shook her head.

  “That’s a coincidence.”

  “You’re sure you didn’t see it that night after the party when I had my shirt off and-”

  “Should I have? Where is it?”

  “I don’t know if I should kill you or believe you.”

  “Maybe you should show it to me,” I said. “I’m sure I’ll recognize it if I’ve seen it before.”

  She laughed. “Like a police lineup? Like ‘Do you recognize any of these seahorses, sir?’”

  “I’m seriously replaying that night in my mind over and over, but-”

  “Well stop doing that,” she said.

  “So where is it?”

  She cocked an arm and pressed a finger just below the outside edge of her left breast.

  “How would I have seen it? You had a bra on.”

  “So you say,” she said. “But you could’ve peeked.”

  “Please tell me you don’t really think I would do that.”

  “I don’t,” she said. “But the kite-”

  “Was just a coincidence.”

  “In that case,” she said, slicing through another cheesy bite of calzone. “It was very thoughtful, and I appreciate it.”

  “You’re welcome. I thought you would prefer it to flowers.”

  “You were going to get me flowers?”

  “Of course,” I said. “That boat ride was the most fun I’ve had with a woman since I was seventeen.”

  She blushed. “I had fun, too.”

  “Good. Because I really like you, Jolie. I’ve liked you since the day I met you, and I know I’m supposed to stop because we work together, but I can’t.”

  She pursed her lips and set her fork down. “I don’t want you to stop. I really like you, too.”

  I slid her takeout container out of the way so I could scoot closer. “Even when I’m obviously trying to trick you into getting naked?”

  “Oh my god you’re still thinking about my tattoo.”

  “I think I’m going to go crazy if you don’t show it to me.”

  She twisted her mouth like she was considering it. “I don’t show it to very many people.”

  I grew hard at the thought of seeing it up close.

  She batted her heavy lashes. “It’s kind of a shy seahorse.”

  Chapter 27: Jolie

  It was all so surreal and romantic, and being back in that hidden dune with him was making me feel young again.

  Here was this amazing guy who was as thoughtful as he was successful and handsome, and he was acting like there was nothing he wanted more in the whole world than to see my silly little tattoo.

  What’s more, he’d bought me a kite of my favorite animal on a whim before surprising me with beer and my favorite takeout in what was hands down my favorite place on Earth.

  I stared into his dark eyes and listened to the sea oats rustling in the breeze.

  Part of me felt like it was a trap. It was too full on- the seduction, the look in his eyes, the coincidences. It all seemed too good to be true.

  But at the same time, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I should let myself be swept up in it.

  Why shouldn’t a great guy be interested in me? Why shouldn’t a great guy spoil me a little?

  Just because I’d never known the kind of gut churning feeling I felt with him didn’t mean I should run away. Not that I could possibly run. I felt too much like I was leaning into the wind over a great cliff, my arms spread as if I were flying.

  And the darker it got, the more familiar it all felt.

  I wasn’t nearly as hammered as I’d been on that first rum filled night we spent together, of course. But I had a solid buzz going and Adam was making me laugh with such frequency it was as if he’d deactivated every line of defense I had.

  “I’ve been thinking about that kiss,” he said. “The one on the boat.”

  I turned my gaze from the starry sky and looked at him.

  “It’s been driving me to distraction.”

  “Really?” I asked, crossing my ankles.

  “I tried to get in the wrong car in the parking lot twice,” he said. “And I got lost on one of my morning runs this past week.”

  “You got lost?”

  He nodded. “I was just running along- thinking about kissing you- and then bam, I was in Leopardstown.”

  I craned my neck forward. “Are you kidding? That’s so far away!”

  “I realize that,” he said. “Halfway back I hailed a taxi.”

  I laughed. “Anything else?”

  “I forgot to eat lunch on Wednesday.”

  “Shit, Adam. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It was the best week I’ve had in ages.”

  “Maybe it’s best that I don’t kiss you again,” I said, suppressing a smile. “I’d hate to make things worse for you.”

  “I was thinking the opposite,” he said. “I’m convinced the only way to find
peace again would be to kiss you a thousand times.”

  “A thousand times?!”

  “Or as many times as it takes for it to not feel like such a big deal anymore.”

  I glanced at his lips.

  “Which might only be twice. It’s hard to say.”

  “Twice?!” I smacked him in the arm.

  “All I need is your permission,” he said. “And I’ll leave no stone unturned.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “It means I’m going to kiss every inch of you until I find that damn seahorse, and I’m not going to stop there.”

  The thought of him kissing me naked in the sand again was enough to make me wet.

  “But there’s something I have to tell you first.”

  “What?” I asked, my stomach tightening.

  “I haven’t been completely honest with you.”

  I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. None of this is real. What was I thinking?

  “I lied to you,” he said. “A long time ago.”

  I furrowed my brow. “What are you talking about?”

  “It only seemed like a white lie at the time.”

  “You’re freaking me out, Adam.”

  “I was just trying to do the right thing.”

  “Spit it out already.”

  “Do you remember the first night we came here?” he asked.

  I nodded as blurry memories flashed through my mind.

  “Remember when you told me you were a virgin?” he asked. “And you asked me if I knew what I was doing?”

  I swallowed. “Yes.”

  “Well, I didn’t.”

  “What are you saying?”

  “I was a virgin, too.”

  My eyes grew wide.

  He looked back at me, his gaze so unflinching I knew in my heart he was telling the truth.

  “I was your first?” I asked.

  He nodded.

  “I don’t understand,” I said. “Why would you lie about that?”

  He shrugged. “I’ve wondered that myself over the years.”

  “And have you drawn any conclusions?”

  “I think I wanted you to feel like you were in safe hands.”

  “I did,” I said. I still do.