7 Lessons From Heaven

by Mary C Neal

  Joy is not something you can chase, and unlike happiness, joy is not found within the world. David expresses the link between trust and joy. Take, for example, this joy-filled declaration in Psalm 92:4–5: “For you make me glad by your deeds, Lord; I sing for joy at what your hands have done. How great are your works, Lord, how profound your thoughts!” Even Solomon discovered that the happiness found in the world’s pleasures is ultimately hollow, while the joy found in trusting God is rich and abundant (Ecclesiastes 2).

  Joy is not just about one’s own happiness, but comes from something bigger. It is not fleeting or based on one’s momentary circumstances. It comes from your inner self rather than from something outside of you.

  Joy is a state of being that blossoms from this trust in God’s promises. It allows us to transcend our circumstances and find beauty, even in suffering and struggle.

  Choosing to live with absolute trust is, indeed, the doorway to living a joy-filled life. But, in my experience, even joy takes tending. Its foundation can begin to weaken if we stop keeping the reality of heaven and God’s amazing promises at the forefront of our minds. In this closing chapter, I want to share encouragements from my own life that can help you tend what is beginning to flourish in your life.

  KEEP LOOKING UP

  Mine is a family of Nordic skiers. Depending on where you live, that pastime might sound exotic, but Bill and I have raised our family beneath the towering peaks of the Grand Tetons. Nordic skiers tend to ski over hills instead of riding a lift or skiing around them, which makes the sport grueling and demands perfect technique. Sticky wax on the bottom of “classic” skis helps the skier propel himself or herself forward when he or she properly weights the ski and kicks backward. The more difficult and steep the conditions, the more important it is to center your weight over the waxed part of the ski.

  Toward the end of a long race, exhausted skiers often begin to crumble and look down, but that spells trouble. Their shoulders sag, their weight shifts, and the ski loses traction. The resulting struggle and frustration can be eased by one simple action—looking up. This action automatically repositions a skier’s weight and gives them the “kick” they need to propel themselves up and over the hill.

  You can see where I’m going with this. When we face challenges, don’t we tend to look down, feeling crushed by the weight of our concerns, sadness, and anxiety? I do. But without looking up, we miss the beauty. We don’t notice the miracles, or sense God’s nudge in critical moments. We wonder where God is and may not feel His presence as He walks next to us or begins to carry us.

  We may forget that when God is for us, no one can be against us (Romans 8:31), and that He uses ordinary people to accomplish great things. We may lose the confidence to step out in faith and ignore those who say we are not good enough, talented enough, or smart enough to reach our dreams. We may forget that God does not call qualified people, but qualifies the ones He calls.

  Without looking up, we forget that we are beloved children of God. We easily focus on our flaws instead of celebrating our unique combination of attributes and gifts. In questioning God’s miracles, we feel discouraged instead of celebrating our intellectual curiosity and desire for experiential learning.

  We forget that God’s love is for all people—even the ones we don’t like or those who have hurt us. We forget that everyone carries a heavy burden and needs compassion rather than judgment, and we forget that we are meant to be agents of God’s peace, love, and joy.

  We will surely have seasons of happiness as well as heartache and without looking up we may overlook the opportunity to recognize that each experience is helping to shape us into the fullness of who we are intended to be. Even in the midst of chronic illness we need not lose heart, for as written in 2 Corinthians 4:16, we may be outwardly wasting away but inwardly renewed day by day. We can be assured that “our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all” (2 Corinthians 4:17). As we form an unshakable trust in His promises, the path before us becomes smooth, and we can rise above our circumstances.

  When we stop looking up, we miss seeing the heaven that is within each day.

  PRACTICING TO REMEMBER

  To keep the reality of heaven and God’s amazing promises at the forefront of our minds, I recommend creating memory markers throughout your day. I think of them as the stones the people of Israel used to build a reminder of God’s faithfulness (Joshua 4) which, in the time of the prophet Samuel, became known as Ebenezers (1 Samuel 7:12). The Ebenezers we incorporate into our daily lives help us remember our journey of trust.

  Of course, everyone has different routines and will respond to different types of Ebenezers, but I will share some of the ones that have worked for me.

  Prayer always seems to bring my focus back to the trustworthiness of God and His promises. For me, prayer is primarily an act of praise, submission, and gratitude, knowing that God provides what we need, even if it is not necessarily what we want. In the midst of struggle, gratitude can feel in short supply. But even during such times, we can be grateful for the ways in which the struggle is molding us and producing an opportunity to grow into the person God would like us to be. While we might only see the next few steps ahead, God sees the entire path of our life. Making a gratitude list each day, even a short one, provides a reminder of God’s love and helps us to remember to keep looking up.

  Prayer also helps with discernment, and perhaps just as importantly, it helps to live with uncertainty. As we pray about our worries, joys, confusion, or decisions, God comforts us, and the Holy Spirit can direct our feelings, thoughts, and actions.

  What prayer Ebenezer works best for you? You might like to pray while you’re exercising or commuting. Or like me, you might start your day with prayer—before opening my eyes each morning, I silently recite the Lord’s Prayer, and say “yes” to God.

  Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name,

  thy kingdom come, thy will be done,

  on earth as it is in heaven.

  Give us this day, our daily bread,

  forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us,

  and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil,

  for yours is the kingdom and the power

  and the glory, forever.

  I know that when I say yes to God, I say yes to the power of the Holy Spirit to show me God’s will and provide wisdom, knowledge, faith, healing, and discernment.

  SMALL BUT POWERFUL

  I’m not sure how big those stone reminders were that Samuel and Joshua raised in ancient times, but I’ve found that “small” works for me just fine. Here’s my list:

  I have a daily devotional next to my bed that I read as I am brushing my teeth in the morning, giving my thoughts direction as I finish my morning routine.

  As I walk outside, I take in a full breath of mountain air and feel gratitude for my ability to do so.

  On my morning commute, I usually see the sun beginning to rise over the mountains on the other side of the valley. I never fail to be awed and I never fail to be grateful for where I live. I use that drive time to think about God’s presence in my life and thank Him for His presence, grace, and love. I always ask that God helps me that day to see where He is leading me and how I can be of service to His kingdom.

  Sometimes I will listen to contemporary Christian music.

  I look for synchronicities—happenings from God. I try to be aware of angels and miracles. I strive to always have an open heart and spirit in every situation, considering if an event or encounter may have more significance than it seems on the surface.

  I try to be aware of the inner prompts—those nagging thoughts and feelings that won’t go away, even if I don’t understand them. If I feel prompted to call someone, go somewhere, or say something, I make an effort to follow through. I often have no idea why I am being prompted, but I try to respond anyway.

  I wear a cross on a necklace ben
eath my shirt. Whenever I feel it on my skin, I’m reminded of who I am, whose I am, and in whom I trust. I am reminded to keep looking up.

  A decorative cross hangs in my office to remind me how I want to treat other people. Next to it, a wall hanging shows the words of Psalm 19:14: “May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

  I place wall hangings and sticky notes of my favorite sayings, quotes, and verses that remind me of God’s promises in places where I am sure to see them: at my bedside, next to my bathroom sink, on the microwave oven, and on the wall behind my computer at work. In the Jewish tradition, this is the function of a mezuzah case, which contains a message from the Torah and is attached to doorways as a reminder of God’s covenant.

  Make your Ebenezers personal, even if they seem silly—why not? Each time I find a coin on the ground, I pick it up and read its imprint of “In God We Trust.” I use these times to ask myself, In this very moment, is my trust entirely in God’s promises? When I can answer affirmatively, I put the coin in my pocket and proceed with my day.

  Think of your journal as your memory book, your personal collection of Ebenezer stones. And in the future, if you find yourself questioning God’s nearness, you can always look back in your own memory book for reminders of his loving presence.

  And finally, join a faith community that provides a regular reminder of the realities of heaven, as well as education and growth. Get involved in sharing yourself with others. Be a window through which God’s light can illuminate the path for others. You may feel that your efforts are but a drop in the ocean of need, but the ocean would be less without your drop.

  THE SWEETEST FRUIT—A JOY-FILLED LIFE

  Unfailing. Unshakable. Trust offers a taste of heaven each day as our eyes and hearts are open to God’s abundant love, grace, and miraculous presence in our world. As we keep God’s promises foremost in our thoughts and choose to trust, life begins to change. With change, we begin to experience the fruits of this transformation—greater love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self-control.

  Each of these is valuable and worthy but, for me, the very sweetest fruit produced from living with absolute trust is that of living with joy—joy in success and joy in failure; joy in unbridled happiness as well as joy in the midst of crushing sorrow. Where there is joy, there is God’s presence. The joy of heaven is God’s enduring gift to each of us, whatever our circumstances. Living a joy-filled life is the natural outcome of choosing to live in the truth of God’s promises and offers a taste of what our loving God has in mind for our future…right now.

  May the sweetest fruit of heaven be yours today, and every day of your life.

  Acknowledgments

  The writing of a book always involves the support and encouragement of many, and I am grateful to all who are, or have been, a part of my life. I would like to specifically thank:

  Bill Neal, for your unwavering love, humor, and steadfastness. I could not walk this road without you.

  Willie, Eliot, Betsy, and Peter Neal, without whom life would be very dull.

  David Kopp, for believing I had something to say and helping me say it beautifully.

  Elizabeth Gerdts, for always being a source of sunshine and laughter.

  Keith Wall, for your way with words.

  Betty Thum, for always showing how to love unconditionally.

  Ann Bayer, Julie Connors, Susan Farquhar, Kelly Kiburis, Becky Patrias, and Linda Purdy, for more than fifty years of unconditional friendship.

  Merle Long, for reminding me that big ideas do not need to be complicated.

  Tom, Debbi, Jean, Kenneth, Anne, Rachel, Kayla, Isabel, Chad, Krista, Kyler, Bryson, Jenna, Tren, Linzie, Merle, Olivia, and Isaac Long for your love and for being such beautiful examples of what it means to live in one’s faith.

  Mel Berger, for perpetually offering cheerful encouragement.

  Marta Lozano, Robin Steinmann, Heidi Anderson, and Alisha Keyworth, for keeping the wheels on the bus.

  David Pfeifer, for being steadfast in your humor and friendship.

  Father Ubald Rugirangoga, Rev. Dr. Paul Hayden, Rev. Mike Atkins, and Katsey Long, for your friendship, nurturing, and for being such great examples of joyful living.

  Gil Malinkrodt, for your stories.

  Joe, from California, and everyone like him, whose self-made barriers must crack before God’s light can enter in.

  READING GROUP GUIDE

  You’d be hard-pressed to find a more fascinating, yet more far-reaching conversation than the one Dr. Mary Neal presents in this book! Take just some of her topics: What happens when we die? What is heaven like? Is there an angel near me right now? Do miracles happen? And what difference should our answers on such topics make in our life today? Happily, the scope and significance of such questions is more than matched by their promise. As Mary says, the truths that heaven reveals are intended to change how we live on Earth, and for the better. She writes, “My goal in this book is to help others live every day with absolute trust that God is good and his promises are true. Living in absolute trust is not just for people who’ve visited heaven. It’s meant for everyone, changing what we feel, think, and believe.”

  We have created the Reading Group Guide to help you get the most from 7 Lessons from Heaven. When you gather with others who bring similar interests to a reading experience, you greatly enhance your ability to process and apply what you’ve read. Use the guide as a starting point rather than as a final exam. The best discussion groups don’t insist on agreement, but invite and respect a range of thoughts and reactions to the materials. Listen carefully, share honestly, and open your heart to new insights. And most of all, enjoy!

  —THE EDITORS

  Introduction, This Changes Everything

  1. Dr. Neal writes that as a surgeon, she had been conditioned by many years of medical training to be skeptical of anything beyond the scientific realm. “If it couldn’t be measured, probed, x-rayed, and reproduced, then I couldn’t rationally accept it.” How would you describe the attitude or predisposition you bring to reading 7 Lessons from Heaven?

  2. She also admits that putting personal spiritual experiences into words is difficult. Based on your own life, do you agree or disagree? Do you think a person’s spiritual experience might actually be diminished when it is neatly wrapped up in approved religious language? Why or why not?

  3. Have you or someone close to you had a near-death experience? If you’re willing to talk about it—or at least try—please share it; others will be grateful.

  4. If you had to identify one personal need or question that you most want this book to help you with, what would it be? Write it down or talk about it.

  Chapter 1, River of Death, River of Life

  1. This chapter begins with a fast-paced retelling of the accident that led to Mary’s drowning and the experiences that followed. Were you able to relate to Mary’s description of actually feeling quite peaceful in the moment of crisis? She says, for example, “I experienced no air hunger, no panic, and no fear.” Share your reaction to Mary’s account or a similar experience from your own life.

  2. Have you ever felt the physical sensation of being held and comforted by Jesus or God? If so, describe.

  3. As Mary describes what she saw in heaven, what thoughts, feelings, or questions occurred to you?

  4. In heaven, Mary received heartbreaking news about the future death of her oldest son. Have you ever had a foresight or premonition that later proved accurate? If so, what was that like for you? How did it affect your understandings or your actions?

  Chapter 2, Seeing My Life from Outside Time

  1. The Bible says that, with God, one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years is like one day (2 Peter 3:8). Do you ever feel that God’s clock and yours run on wildly different rates? If so, discuss.

  2. When you lose track of time, what are you likely to be doing?


  3. Most people, even longtime believers, feel some anxiety about how Jesus will evaluate their lives. If this is true for you, would you say it’s mostly a function of how you understand scripture, or mostly a function of being your own worst critic?

  4. Mary writes that when her childhood prayers for her parents’ marital reconciliation went unanswered, she felt betrayed and abandoned by God, and thereafter “discarded my childhood notions of a loving heavenly Father.” Comment on that based on your experience? Do you sometimes think of prayer as presenting your wish list?

  5. Talk about your perspective on what Mary calls the First Lesson That Heaven Reveals: When we look at circumstances through the lens of heaven, understanding prevails, and the grace we receive from God is the same grace we can freely offer others. Can you see how understanding another person’s history changes your perspective of them? Is this easy to do? Does your understanding of grace coincide with Mary’s? Can you think of a time when your perspective of someone changed once you understood their personal history?

  Chapter 3, We Are Both Physical and Spiritual Beings

  1. Mary writes, “What I discovered when I stopped being a ‘physical being’ was that my capacity for experiencing everything around me—including and especially the profound love of God for me—radically expanded. Actually, I have never felt more alive than when I left my body far behind.” What thoughts or feelings did you have as you read that?

  2. “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience,” wrote philosopher and priest Pierre Teilhard de Chardin. “We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” Mary’s version of the same insight is that we are mostly spirit encased in an “earth suit.” Do you agree with this perspective? How might this insight affect your decisions and emotions today?