Where Mercy Is Shown, Mercy Is Given (2010)

by Chapman, Duane Dog

I was a little embarrassed to admit I didn’t even know how to spell the word I’d uttered that brought us together that day. Roy was stunned by my innocence. He looked at his son and said, “He doesn’t even know how to spell it, how could he be a racist?” Perhaps that moment helped him to understand how naïve I really was. Whatever the reasons, Roy got to know me that day.

  “You don’t fit any criteria for a racist, Dog,” he told me.

  Thank God I found an ally. I was looking for a leader to help me and found a friend. I began crying tears of joy and screaming “Hallelujah” at the top of my lungs. I wanted to shout from the highest mountaintop that I had been forgiven. I turned to Roy and Niger and said, “The Lord is on the mountain,” quoting the great Martin Luther King. All they could say was “Amen!”

  After hearing my side of the story, Roy realized that the controversy had unjustly spiraled out of control after the tapes were released out of context. He agreed to mentor me in my efforts to seek reconciliation and atonement for my careless language.

  Before I left his office that day, I noticed that Roy’s son was wearing a pin that had the letter “N” on it in a circle with a slash through it. I asked if I could have one.

  Niger said, “Yeah, but I don’t think you should pass them out!”

  I wore that pin on every show and at every appearance I made after our meeting. Even today, I carry the pin Niger gave me in my pocket when I’m out on bounty hunts. Something about having it with me makes me feel protected.

  One of the fights CORE was involved in that intrigued me was the belief that the “N” word is being abused by the entertainment industry. Niger, in particular, voiced his concerns about the industry’s double standards, which allow comedians such as David Alan Grier or Dave Chappelle to be given a pass when doing skits using the “N” word, without public outcry. Rappers are also given a pass to use it with far more consistency and stereotyping. To some degree, my use of the word fell into the pass/no pass system being used in today’s pop culture. David Alan Grier did a short monologue about my use of the word and used it over and over again to make his point. There were no headlines, no fallout for his show, Chocolate News, and no public outcry against his tirade. I wanted to do whatever I could to help CORE resolve this issue within the entertainment industry.

  After our first meeting in New York, Roy Innis had a change of heart about old Doggie. Beth and I attended a luncheon hosted by Mr. Innis at the CORE headquarters in New York, where we posed for photos and got to know his predominately African-American staff, none of whom seemed reluctant to pose with us. It had become pretty clear to most everyone there that the papers had made me out to be something I wasn’t. In fact, Roy Innis came out and publicly made a statement about the matter, saying, “Like many that heard the comments made by Duane ‘the Dog’ Chapman without the proper context, I was offended and outraged. After meeting with him and his wife Beth, and hearing his side of the story, we realized that the controversy had unjustly spiraled out of control without context.”

  His public statement vindicated me in the eyes of his organization, and I believe it started me down the path of recovery and reconnecting with the African-American community. After that luncheon, Roy invited me to attend a CORE dinner in late January 2008 honoring Martin Luther King. I was told I’d be attending with Senator John McCain and a host of other high-profile politicians and celebrities. I was deeply honored by the request and gladly accepted the offer to attend.

  I have never forgotten a rebroadcast speech I heard Martin Luther King give on television when I was in Huntsville prison. He said, “The Bible says an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.” At the time, I remember thinking, Right on. And then he said something like “America would be blind and toothless if we lived like that.” I couldn’t get his words out of my mind. I walked around the rest of the day thinking how great this man was. He made an unforgettable impression on me and gave me the gift of realizing that revenge has its price too.

  CORE had asked me to speak at the Martin Luther King dinner. As I prepared for the evening, I wanted to find a connection to Dr. King that would make my presence relevant that night. And then it occurred to me that James Earl Ray had been wanted for breaking out of jail by hiding out in a bread truck, making him a flat-out fugitive when he shot and killed Martin Luther King. If I had been bounty hunting back then, he was just the type of guy I would have gone after. Knowing this fact gave me a purpose for being there and an inspiration to speak to the crowd. As I spoke, I thought I did a good job capturing the audience, but someone later told me that T. D. Jakes refused to listen to what I had to say and walked out before I was done.

  After I spoke, an African-American woman approached me with her young daughter, a beautiful child wearing a pretty red dress. The little girl couldn’t have been more than ten years old. The mother explained that her daughter was a huge fan of my show and wanted to meet me after she heard that I had said a very bad word. She said they saved up for three weeks to buy the young girl’s dress so she’d have something pretty to wear when she met me. Later that night, someone told me they had actually saved up for months. I said hello to the little girl and told her how sorry I was for what I had said. She looked up at me, with a big ol’ smile and simply said, “I love you and forgive you, Dog.”

  My heart melted on the spot and tears streamed down my cheeks. I was so worried I had disappointed this child—that she wouldn’t understand why Uncle Dog used the bad word he did. I was ready to explain myself to her if need be, but she never asked for explanations. Her innocence, love, and acceptance showed me the great power in forgiveness—especially from a child. I will take her love and acceptance with me for the rest of my days.

  After my positive experiences with Roy Innis and CORE, I spent the next several months going on what Beth and I dubbed my “Apology Tour.” I knew I could change people’s minds if I was given the chance. I was being horribly misrepresented in the press, and it didn’t look like things were going to turn around unless I could convince people to give me a shot at redemption. If they could give me that, I was positive I would be in their hearts forever.

  I attended several events, including holiday toy drives and drug awareness symposiums and town hall meetings, where I could give back to the community. I enjoyed getting out and talking with people at all of those events, but there was one local toy drive in Los Angeles I’ll never forget. I met a father and son who touched my heart. The father, who was not more than just a kid himself, told me he’d never been able to save enough money to buy his son a toy for Christmas. Of course, I thought back to my struggle in buying Tucker his My Buddy doll and remembered how I felt. The young dad went on to tell me his son had no toys at home.

  “I don’t know why I’m here. I can’t believe I’m doing this, Dog. I’m reaching out to you, of all people,” he said.

  All I could say was “Thank you.”

  I hugged the father and then knelt down and put my hands out for his son. He was the real reason I was there that day. I wanted to show how much love I have in my heart for all people, but especially for those who are less fortunate, because I have been there myself. I will never forget those hungry years and I am reminded so often, now more than ever, that we are all the same.

  I made a big spectacle out of the three us hanging out the rest of the day. I gave the young boy a toy truck I’d saved for one special kid. His face lit up with excitement as soon as he saw it. It was rewarding to be able to do something to brighten that young boy’s day. There’s nothing like the love you get from a child. It’s pure, authentic, and real. If enduring the difficult experiences that got me to the toy drive that day was the price I had to pay in order to meet a family like that father and son, then it was all worth it. I’d sit through a grilling on national television every day for a month just to get one smile, one hug, and one “thank you” like I did that day.

  My new association with CORE allowed me to affect change in some very unexpected areas. I eve
n found myself in a roundtable discussion with members of CORE, the NAACP, and the ACLU, defending a Hassidic Jewish police officer’s right to keep his beard because of his religious beliefs. I was stunned to hear that a police department was trying to force a good cop off the squad because of his facial hair, which is against department policy. After the ACLU applied enough pressure and threatened to go to court over the officer’s civil rights, the police chief agreed to let him stay on the force if he only worked undercover duty. In the end, the officer called me to say thank you because he could keep on doing what he loved—being a cop.

  It wasn’t until I helped the ACLU and CORE to allow that cop to keep his job that I truly realized my mishap could allow me to help others who were suffering. Though I wouldn’t have asked for the attention that was brought upon me after the National Enquirer tapes were released, I believe that much more good than harm has resulted from it. The controversy surrounding me was just another mountain I was forced to climb in my life.

  In the beginning, my heart was bursting with tears of pain, but now I am filled with tears of joy for the opportunities I’ve had and the changes I’ve been able to make since the story broke. My new role gave me the responsibility of being a racial healer for our country. I was a changed man with a higher purpose.

  The strangest part of the Apology Tour was that of all the people I shook hands with and met along the way, I found myself constantly surprised at how merciful the African-American community was, while the white community remained angry and unforgiving for what I had said. There was even a white supremacy group that was angry with me for apologizing for my careless slip.

  In early 2008, I received a call from a well-known member of the KKK asking me to come to Texas to give a speech for their group at an upcoming meeting. I told the man who called me that I couldn’t do it.

  “You know me, bro. I’m not like that,” I said.

  He pleaded with me that I had an opportunity to use the situation to help lots of people who feel the way the Klan does.

  “A lot of us are sick of it, Dog. We are sick of the crime, the assaults, all of it.”

  I was getting angry listening to him talk. I said, “You think white men don’t commit the same crimes? I see it every day, brother.”

  Not long after that call I read an article on the Internet that said there was a $75,000 bounty on my head because I didn’t promote white pride. I have spent my entire life knowing there is always going to be the presence of good and evil in this world. Evil can come in many forms, such as negativity, discontent, or plain stupidity. Believe me, those forces are almost as strong as the good. There were a lot of thoughts going through my mind when I read that article.

  I said, “Come and get me!” after I finished reading the last word. I dared anyone to try to get my badge. I wasn’t raised to give evil forces the power to win. I learned to go with the good because it always prevails. Some people will never understand that. They never gamble on doing the right thing. They see a crime going down and think, If I get out to help that person, the bad guys will come after me, too. Or If I get involved in this robbery, they’re going to shoot me.

  Me…I say, “Me and you, right now. Let’s go.” That’s the old fighter in me.

  So when I was confronted by a white supremacist from the Aryan Nations after a public appearance, about why I didn’t stand up for what I’d said, the first thing I thought was I could rip this guy in half.

  I remembered the Aryan guys I knew in the joint. I couldn’t go around with them for two reasons: first, because of my friendship with Whitaker, and second, because I didn’t support their way of thinking.

  I looked the muscle-bound, tatted Aryan thug up and down while he was spewing his racist thoughts and knew I could take him for sure. Because I am in the public eye, physical confrontations are no longer my thing. But you can believe I got pretty vocal with that guy. He could tell he was going down the wrong path with me. I got right in his face and told him I didn’t care what his homies thought, I was not a racist and I didn’t think he should say the hateful things that were coming out of his mouth either. By the end of our twenty-minute dialogue, this poor fool was apologizing to me and asking for free Dog the Bounty Hunter T-shirts.

  I started bawling after he walked away. I was stunned that I was able to turn his twisted thoughts around. I raised my hands in the air and said, “Thank you, Lord.”

  One down and, sadly, too many left to go.

  CHAPTER 13

  (credit: Chaz)

  Although I was slowly mending fences in the African-American community, I wasn’t sure all of my efforts would be enough to convince A&E to give me back my show. I was hopeful that I’d be given the opportunity to prove I wasn’t the bad guy the media had made me out to be, but I wasn’t 100 percent sure the network would give me that chance. I’d seen plenty of guys bounce back from drugs or alcohol, but there aren’t many who came back after racial tirades. If the network didn’t believe in me, I would be done in Hollywood. I didn’t care about the celebrity aspect so much as the platform, which allowed me to reach and help a great many people. Helping my brothers and sisters has always been the thrust behind my desire to be in the spotlight.

  I worried about the network’s decision day and night. Lots of people told me I had nothing to be concerned about, that after the dust settled everything would turn around. I still wasn’t sure. And then one night I went to sleep and had a dream where I was standing over my own grave. I looked at the headstone and noticed the initials A&E in the bottom right corner. They had made sure I had a headstone. God was showing me everything was going to be all right, that I would get my show back and would soon be doing what I loved most. I woke up the next morning and told Beth about my premonition.

  “We’re getting the show back, Beth. I promise you, we will be on the air again soon.”

  Sure enough, through the efforts of many supporters and the mercy shown by the network, on February 20, 2008, A&E announced that our show was headed back to television. The executives told me their reason for bringing Dog the Bounty Hunter back was plain and simple: Since my show is predicated on second chances, they decided to give me one too. I was in Las Vegas working on a case when I got the good word. In an ironic twist, on the very same day the network gave me back my show, Jesse Jackson accidently used the “N” word during an interview with Bill O’Reilly. I hadn’t been able to figure out why he was in my dream a few months earlier until I heard that news. But when I did, it all made sense. Of course, there was virtually no fallout for Jesse Jackson’s error. In fact, it was all but buried in the press. The upside was that from that day on, my name was no longer uttered every time someone made the same mistake.

  The news of our return to television made worldwide headlines. I remember reading the scroll at the bottom of the CNN ticker with tears in my eyes. I was so happy and relieved that I broke down and cried. Everything I had worked for had hung in television purgatory for months. I knew I’d always be able to make a living, but without my show I couldn’t reach the millions of viewers who tuned in every week, with my singular message to help them get a second chance at life. If just one viewer decides to get clean, give up crime, go back to school, or be a better parent because of something on my show, then I am satisfied. Now more than ever, I dedicated myself to reaching out to those folks in any way I could, so I could spread the word that I was there to help them take that first step.

  I was looking forward to getting back to work and doing what I love most. Even though the network announced the return of Dog the Bounty Hunter in February, we didn’t actually go back into production until April. We shot the new shows in Denver, where each capture we made became headlines in the local papers. Every news story written about me started out with a sentence that read something like this: “Dog, who used the ‘N’ word, captured another fugitive…” Once the show was back on the air, however, the tide began to turn toward the way things used to be before the National Enquirer story. Fo
r the first time in months I felt like people were once again judging me for the good things I was doing and were no longer just pointing the racist finger in my direction.

  It felt great to be back in the saddle. I will always be grateful to A&E for their belief in me and the work I do. Everyone at the network assured me that they knew I wasn’t a racist or the kind of person who stood for intolerance. Their kind words meant the world to me. Beth and I sent the president of the network flowers for thirty days in a row as a small token of our appreciation, but they could never convey just how grateful I was to have them in my corner. The card read, “Abbey: Have I thanked you today?”

  When they told me they were putting the show back into production, the executives from the network said they had all the confidence in the world that our audience would be there for us when we hit the air—and boy were they right. Our premiere episode debuted with 30 percent more viewers than we had had when we were taken off the air. The Dog was back and bigger than ever.

  By the time the show aired, I finally felt free. I was back on television, it felt like I had been forgiven for my ignorance, I was back to bounty hunting, and I was finally out of the federal government’s hold. I no longer had to ask for permission to travel in the United States, as I had while my Mexican extradition case was still open. There were no more restrictions placed on what I could or couldn’t do, and I felt totally and completely emancipated from the hell I’d been living since capturing Andrew Luster. It was as if the slate had been wiped clean—sort of. Despite my being able to travel in the United States, because of my felony conviction I still have to get permission to travel outside the country. I was recently contacted by people in London to go over and help Parliament create a plan to clean up the massive problem they have with violent gangs in and around the city. I was all set to make the trip when I was told England would not grant me a visa to enter the country because of my criminal history, even claiming that I had been convicted of the same crimes as Jack the Ripper! I was devastated because I was eager to get over there and help clean up their cities and streets.