The Unfailing Light (The Katerina Trilogy 2)

by Robin Bridges

  I wondered just how much magic was required for maintaining the spell around Smolny. The empress must have been more powerful than anyone suspected. Or she had someone or something helping her.

  We were coming to the end of the path and Grand Duchess Miechen’s carriage was waiting for Dariya. I embraced her when we got to the carriage. “Thank you so much for coming to visit. It would not have been the same if I’d had to spend my birthday here alone.”

  “We’ve been celebrating your birthday together out here in the courtyard for six years. Under this same birch tree! Since you would not leave Smolny, I had to come to you.” Dariya smiled. “The grand duchess sends her birthday wishes for you as well. As does my stepmaman.”

  “Give them both my thanks,” I said.

  She turned around to look at me. “What are you going to do about your grand duke?”

  “Worry.” I could think of nothing else. It was not proper for me to write to him. And whom could I trust to send a message for me? Not Dariya.

  Dariya sighed. “Then I wish I hadn’t distressed you with the news. I would not have told you if I did not think you could do something about it. I thought you and the grand duke had an understanding.”

  I shook my head. “The only understanding we have is that he has his path to follow and I have mine.”

  My cousin crushed me in her arms. “I’m so sorry, Katiya. Perhaps it is for the best. You belong in the Dark Court, after all. With us. You deserve a proper Dark Court marriage.”

  I shivered at her words. Why was she so ready to claim her alliance with Miechen? Of course, it was the court we’d both grown up in, whether we were aware of it as children or not. I pulled away and stared at her. “What if I don’t want a marriage at all?”

  “That’s ridiculous. You can study medicine if you wish and still be married. I’ve learned that there are girls who marry male students just so they can attend the university. Without their father’s or guardian’s permission, they simply find husbands of convenience. Usually for a large amount of money, of course.”

  “That is not what I want at all,” I said. I remembered Dr. Bokova, the woman I’d met on the train. Did she have to marry a stranger in order to get her education? No wonder she thought I was privileged and spoiled.

  Dariya smiled. “I believe you can create the life you want, Katiya. You are strong enough to make all of your dreams come true.”

  “And what about you? What about your dreams?”

  My cousin shrugged. “I want the rich and handsome husband and the grand palace. That is enough for me, I think.” She glanced around and, seeing we were still alone, she smiled. “And there are several rich and handsome young men that attend Miechen’s court. Being a lady-in-waiting has its advantages. The grand duchess has been so kind to me. She’s pointed out several eligible young princes.”

  I wondered if Miechen kept Dariya close because of her relationship with me. Was the grand duchess spying on me through my cousin? Surely she had other methods. “Don’t be in such a hurry to get married,” I said. “Enjoy your time at Miechen’s court. Within reason, of course.”

  Dariya grinned. “It would be so much more enjoyable if you were there too. Perhaps I will see you at one of the balls soon?” Her eyes lit up. “The Smolny Ball is coming up!”

  I brightened up at the thought, remembering my dance with the grand duke. Would the empress allow me to leave the school for the ball? Surely the Winter Palace would be protected from Konstantin and his magic.

  I stood there at the gate and watched the horses pull Dariya’s carriage away, taking my cousin with them. The carriage passed through the spell barrier easily. I hadn’t felt lonely before, but now I felt incredibly alone. And cold.

  The wind had picked up as the sun had begun to sink behind the birch trees. Shivering, I made my way back inside the institute. I had a nice bowl of borscht for supper, and a fruit tart. After dinner, Elena brought out a deck of cards she kept hidden underneath her pillow.

  Erzsebet threw herself down on Elena’s cot. “Are you going to tell Katiya’s fortune?” she asked.

  Elena looked up at me and smiled. It made my blood run cold. “I’d rather you did not,” I began, but she interrupted me.

  “Katerina, it is your birthday! Don’t you want to know what the next year holds for you?” She shuffled the cards in her deck delicately before handing the pack to me. “You only have to pick one card.”

  Erzsebet and Augusta were looking up at me expectantly. Even Aurora, who was writing a letter on her own cot, glanced over at us with curiosity. Elena sighed sadly. “What if the cards can warn you of something before it’s too late? Or prepare you for something exciting?”

  I sighed and took the cards from her hand. I shuffled them again, knowing from watching Maman all these years that the cards would not read properly unless I’d touched them myself. I closed my eyes, willing the cards to say something benign about my future. Please, no Death card or Hanged Man, or anything else that would frighten the Bavarian princesses or cause them to whisper about me in the halls. And Aurora would be sure to tell Princess Alix if my cards foretold of evil and misery.

  I held my breath as I handed the cards back to Elena. I pulled the card on the top of the deck and laid it down, faceup, on her quilt. The Queen of Swords. An elegant but unsmiling woman riding a horse, her sword held up like Joan of Arc. It was the same card the Montenegrins had sent me last year at Christmas. Fear made my stomach clench into knots.

  “Oooh, how pretty!” Erzsebet said, shoving her sister aside to get a better look.

  “Is she going to win a lot of money gambling, like the old woman in that Pushkin story?” Aurora asked.

  Elena’s face showed no surprise. “No.” She picked the card up and examined it more closely. “But she will be taking dangerous risks, just the same.” She looked up at me. “Every queen has her king. And Danilo is waiting for you to realize fate wants the two of you together.”

  I rolled my eyes, pretending the card had not spooked me. “Fate has nothing to do with it. Your ambitious mother wants the two of us together. But it’s not going to happen.”

  She sighed as she wrapped her cards up in a silk cloth and tucked them back under her pillow. “Sometimes I do not understand you, Katerina Alexandrovna. You throw away happiness at every chance you get.”

  I went to sleep that night a little sad that I had not received any card or birthday token from the grand duke. Of course, it would not have been appropriate for him to send me anything, but social propriety had not stopped Danilo. I closed my eyes, wondering if George Alexandrovich even knew when my birthday was. Everyone knew the birth dates and saint days of the imperial family, for all of Russia prayed for each and every one of them. So all my life I’d been saying prayers for His Imperial Highness Grand Duke George Alexandrovich Romanov of Russia. Every April and every May, long before I’d ever met him.

  I thought of his arms around me in the Crimea, his soft lips on mine, and hugged myself in the dark. The recently full moon was shining through our tiny window, illuminating the sleeping bodies of Elena and Aurora. I wiped the silent tears off my face, and made an attempt to quit feeling sorry for myself. Somehow, I did not think my blue-eyed grand duke, somewhere in the moonlit streets of Paris with his secret wizards, was saying any prayers for me. But I could still pray for him. I prayed that he would return safely to me soon.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  The fall days grew chillier and shorter, the nights longer. Alix had returned to Smolny the day after my birthday, looking much healthier than before. But she remained as shy and aloof as ever. Elena and Aurora ignored her, but the Bavarian princesses and I still tried to draw her out of her shell.

  Soon it was almost time for the annual Smolny Ball, where the eldest students were invited to dance at the Winter Palace. One Monday morning, the empress herself arrived at the institute with her oldest daughter, Grand Duchess Xenia, to issue our invitations. It seemed she was planning to lift the c
harm and allow us to go to the ball.

  All the students of the White Form, the eldest class, assembled in the dining room to see the empress. In the room hung a large portrait of the empress’s predecessor, Marie Feodorovna, who was Tsar Alexander the Second’s wife and our present tsar’s mother. I was only ten when she died, but I remembered the scandal caused when the tsar married his longtime mistress and tried to make her the new empress. It had shocked and horrified the rest of the imperial family. Marie Feodorovna had been a sweet and kind, but sickly, woman. When Alexander the Second was assassinated only a few months later, his widow took their children and moved to Paris.

  The current empress was wearing a pale-rose gown with a cameo at her neck. Grand Duchess Xenia followed behind her in a dress of pink and white stripes, carrying a matching parasol. She smiled shyly and winked as soon as she spotted me in the line of students.

  Elena stood at one side of me, and Princess Alix on the other. We curtsied low, as we’d over and over again been taught. The empress slowly walked down the line, nodding at each girl as she passed her. She stopped as she came to the three of us. I felt the familiar shimmering feeling, as her faerie sight washed over me. I did not know if she was looking for anything specific, or if she was trying to intimidate me, her husband’s Dark Court necromancer. The girl who loved her son.

  “Katerina Alexandrovna.” The empress was addressing me. I was allowed to raise my head.

  “Yes, Your Imperial Majesty.”

  “How is your mother?” she asked. “Does she still have that atrocious-looking old cat?”

  “She is well, from the last letter I received from her. It has been several months since I saw her. And her cat, Sasha, is the same, Your Imperial Majesty.” Was this some sort of test? Surely she did not really care about my mother, or her unfortunate and undead cat. The empress had not exchanged any such pleasantries with anyone else.

  “That is good to hear. And how do your studies go?”

  “Very well, Your Imperial Majesty.”

  “That is also good to hear.” Suddenly the shimmering feeling was gone and the empress continued her progress down the line of students. Why had she chosen to speak with me? Did she know the truth about Sasha? That I had raised the poor cat from the dead when I was little just so my mother would not be sad?

  Princess Alix looked pale. Perhaps she was sensing the empress’s power for the first time. The empress frowned a little as she looked at Alix with the faerie sight as well. What did she see in the Hessian princess? Had she looked at Elena too?

  When the empress had made her way to the end of our line, she turned to us all and said, “Madame Tomilov has told me how proud she is of everyone. I’m looking forward to seeing you at the Winter Palace next week. I hope it will be a night to remember.”

  We all curtsied in unison. The grand duchess did not say anything, but instead presented us with a box of medical supplies for our small infirmary. She gave us all a shy wave before turning to follow her mother out.

  As soon as the empress and the grand duchess left, we had to return to our classes. Madame Orbellani handed me the box of medical supplies and asked me to take them to Sister Anna.

  On my way to the nurse’s office, I passed the headmistress’s parlor and overheard two women’s voices.

  “See to it that she does not leave the school grounds again, not even when the spell is lifted for the ball next week.”

  “Of course, Your Imperial Majesty.”

  The empress spotted me. “Katerina Alexandrovna, I wish to speak to you. Madame Tomilov, you may leave us.”

  The headmistress’s voice shook slightly. “Yes, Your Imperial Majesty.”

  Willing myself not to show any fear, I entered the parlor and curtsied. The empress was a short woman, but there was nothing petite about her. Her power radiated off of her, filling the whole room with her presence. Her dark-brown eyes bore into me before she spoke. “My wish is that every student here at Smolny remains safe.”

  “Of course, Your Imperial Majesty.”

  “The spell was tried severely when Ella took her foolish sister Alix through with only the protection of a family heirloom. If she thinks she can pull that stunt every full moon, she is very much mistaken.”

  Before I could even begin to wonder what she meant by “every full moon,” she continued. “I will be lifting the spell for the Smolny Ball, but you are to remain here, Katerina. The Order of St. Lazarus has requested that you stay.”

  I felt like I’d been kicked in the chest. “The Order?”

  “Your creatures are here to protect you, of course. From the lich tsar. Their commander feels they can keep you safer here than anywhere else in St. Petersburg.”

  “They are not my creatures, Your Imperial Majesty.” I was shocked at myself for speaking in such a way to my empress, but all I could think of was not being able to see George.

  “They serve the tsar, of course,” she replied with a hint of disdain in her voice. “But they protect you because you are the rightful owner of the talisman.”

  I’d surrendered the Talisman of Isis to the tsar at Peterhof. I wanted nothing more to do with it or its dark powers of necromancy. “I cannot attend the Smolny Ball?” I asked. I could not believe the Order of St. Lazarus had anything to do with her decision.

  “Not this year,” the empress said, her face softening only a little. “You must agree that it’s for the best. You are a danger to him, as well as to yourself.”

  George. She would do everything she could to keep us apart. And she was right. I was a danger to him. But I wasn’t the only danger. “Your Imperial Majesty, I’ve heard alarming stories about the grand duke in Paris. Is he safe?”

  The empress narrowed her eyes at my familiarity. “The grand duke is doing important work for the tsar,” she said. “The Light Court has allies guarding him closely while he finishes his work there.”

  I was able to breathe a little easier, knowing this. Even if I would not be able to see him. Perhaps it was for the best. But I hated it all the same.

  The empress swiftly dismissed me, and I was allowed to return to my errand. I delivered my package to Sister Anna and hurried back to class.

  As I slid into my seat next to Elena in Madame Orbellani’s room, the Montenegrin princess whispered, “I hope the tsarevitch dances with me again. Do you know he has not answered any of my letters since the first one?”

  I could not believe Elena would do something so foolish. “You wrote to the tsarevitch? How could you be sure the letter would reach him? The imperial guard has probably given your letters to the tsar. Or the empress.”

  “She does not like me,” Elena muttered. “But she will. I know she will, once she sees how happy I can make Nicholas Alexandrovich.”

  “Ecoutez, mesdemoiselles,” Madame Orbellani warned.

  I wanted to tell Elena she was deluding herself, but what could I say? I’d been deluding myself as well. The empress had no love for me either. Neither of us would ever be welcome in the Light Court. I grasped her hand and gave it a friendly squeeze. “I think one day soon you will find someone else that suits you better.”

  “But my parents have been hoping for a match between me and the tsarevitch for years. I have dreamed about my wedding for so long I cannot imagine anyone else as my groom.”

  I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t sure if Elena loved Nicholas because she wanted to be the next empress or because it would please her parents. Elena was a romantic who believed in the power of true love, but she was also the daughter of a blood drinker, and a shape-shifting witch. I was scared of her, but couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for her at the same time.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  I was summoned into the headmistress’s parlor that evening. Madame Tomilov looked up at me sternly. “Katerina Alexandrovna, I have heard some troublesome news, young lady. One of the staff has told me that you tried to leave the institute grounds last night.”

  Mon Dieu! Who on earth would lie
to the headmistress about me? “Of course not, Madame. Any of my roommates can tell you the truth. I was asleep all night.”

  “And why wouldn’t this person speak the truth?” Madame Tomilov glared at me. I had never seen her mad before. Especially not at me. “Katerina, I know you were having some difficulty adjusting at the beginning of the school term, but you cannot break the Smolny rules. These rules have been put in place for your safety. I have decided your punishment will be forbidding you from attending the Smolny Ball.”

  This was part of the empress’s plan. She had told the headmistress to punish me, and this is what my classmates would be told when they found out I was not going to the ball. I clasped my hands in defeat. “Of course, Madame,” I whispered, trying very hard not to cry in front of her. I was too old for such displays of emotion. No matter how upset I was.

  “Very well.” Madame Tomilov picked up a pen and began writing in her ledger. “You may return to your class now.”

  I stood up, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.

  Madame Tomilov glanced up at me. “It’s for your own protection, Katerina.”

  I nodded and turned to go. She knew the empress had forbidden me to leave the institute. Madame also knew I had not tried to leave the grounds last night. That was small comfort. I still felt as if I’d been betrayed.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  It was humiliating when Elena and the others found out I was not attending the ball. I could not tell anyone the truth, so I shrugged and scowled and pouted a lot. I hoped I would be able to spend the evening looking for the ghost again. I sat on my bed and pretended to read my Greek poetry while Alix, Elena, and Aurora got dressed.

  “And where did you think you needed to sneak out to?” Elena hadn’t stopped fussing at me all day. “Of all the stupid things to do, Katerina! Missing the ball!”

  “Perhaps she does not enjoy parading around in front of thousands of strangers,” Alix said. She was calmly pinning up her hair, but I could see she looked a little pale. I knew she was nervous about her first Smolny Ball.