A Family Like Hannah's

by Carol Ross

  Last night, her parents had purchased the tree Snowy Sky had donated to the auction. But Hannah’s mom, Margaret, already had a tree decorated with the traditional assortment of family ornaments. Even though they were all grown, Margaret insisted on hanging every ornament her children had ever made over the years. With six kids, there were enough Popsicle-stick, cotton-ball and canning-jar-lid creations to fill nearly every inch of the nine-foot tree.

  Her triplet siblings, Hazel, Iris, and Seth, were home from college for the holidays and also helping to finish the decorating. Later, her mom, Hazel and Iris were going to do some baking. She planned to do some sampling. Shay was coming over to hang out, too, and they were going to plan the menu for the Christmas Eve bash her parents held every year.

  Margaret gestured at the volunteer crew, Ian, who worked at Bradbury’s, and Nick, a part-time busboy from the Faraway Inn. “We’re going to put this tree in the family room. Your father and Seth just moved the foosball table downstairs for the holidays. They’ve got a space all ready for it.”

  “Nice. Okay, guys, this way.” Hannah motioned at the two teenagers.

  She followed. They passed the stairway where Hazel and Iris were now busy giggling and hanging lighted garland along the rail of the landing that stretched across the second floor. Ian nearly ran into the wall, he was so busy gawking at her sisters.

  “Careful there, Romeo,” she muttered as she reached out and snagged him by the back of the shirt, righting his path before he fell over. Clearly embarrassed, he slipped her a grateful grin.

  They continued to their destination where Hannah noticed a mound of boxes piled high, a looming symbol of her next task.

  “Do you want the entire village set up, Mom?” She calculated her mom’s miniature Christmas village took up roughly two acres of space. Her dad and Tag had constructed special tables for the village years ago.

  “Yes, your dad and Seth are getting the tables out of the storage room right now.”

  “How about just the core of the downtown area this year? The cute shops and town square?”

  “Hannah, you know it doesn’t look right without the country church, the school and all the houses. Not to mention the farm and the ice-skating pond.”

  “Okeydokey, farm it is,” she muttered. She steeled herself for a very long day. Sometimes her mother’s decorations felt a bit excessive, sometimes Christmas festivities in general felt a little over the top to her. But it meant a lot to her mom and really, she couldn’t imagine Christmas without her mom’s enthusiasm. She made Christmas special for everyone, especially Christmas Eve.

  She watched the boys setting up the new tree and smiled to herself as she thought about the tree Tate had won. He’d set a record with his purchase. The “mystery bidder” had sure kept things interesting.

  Hannah had been texting Piper the entire time, encouraging her to keep bidding no matter how high it got. Hannah knew Tate would bid whatever it took, so it was a win-win as far as she was concerned. Lucas would have an awesome Christmas tree, the hospital would have the added windfall and Hannah had a bit of satisfaction. In fact, she thought with a grin, that technically made it a win-win-win.

  CHAPTER TEN

  IN THE END Hannah couldn’t bring herself to cancel dinner at Tate’s. Each time she had picked up her phone, Lucas’s hope-filled expression flashed through her mind. She couldn’t do that to Lucas, or to Viktor for that matter. She’d seen Lucas in the atrium several mornings in a row. Tate had joined them a few times, but they hadn’t spoken about anything business related. She was fine with that.

  The special board meeting had been scheduled for two days after Christmas. With the ease of teleconferencing, the general consensus had been to hold the meeting as soon as possible after the holiday. She couldn’t shake the sense of foreboding as she suspected this meant board members were eager to begin initiating Tate’s “new direction.”

  She’d been spending extra hours coming up with a response to counter the proposal she predicted Tate and Park were going to present. She wasn’t sure exactly how they would structure it, but as Tate had pointed out their intentions weren’t really a secret.

  The biggest, most expensive changes concerned adding the half-pipe and the snowboarding terrain. After speaking with their accountant, she believed she had stumbled on the avenue with the most promise to shut them down.

  Pulling into the driveway of Edith’s house—she still couldn’t quite think of it as Tate’s—she gave herself a quick pep talk. After gathering up the shopping bag from the backseat, she headed for the porch where a beaming Lucas opened the door before she could even knock.

  Tate stood behind him, all gorgeous male in a pair of worn jeans and a blue flannel button-down shirt that made his eyes shine like cobalt glass. She loved cobalt glass. And the hopeful, somewhat repentant look on his face that seemed to be asking her not to be mad at him made it difficult to retain that emotion.

  She was terrible at holding a grudge. Also, the striking child with black hair that matched his uncle’s, who was quickly stealing her heart, didn’t help matters either. Especially when he was standing in front of her, bouncing excitedly on his toes like a tiny boxer before a fight.

  He reached for her hand. “Hannah, come and see our Christmas tree. You’re not going to believe it. It’s so great.”

  “Perfect, because I have a gift for you to put under your tree.”

  “For me?” His tone held surprise, and his shy, hope-filled expression had her wondering if he was not used to getting gifts? How could that possibly be the case with Tate as his uncle? The love he felt for his nephew was obvious and his generosity evident.

  “Yes, my young sir, for you.”

  Lucas led her straight to the tree and she pretended as though she didn’t already know that Tate had won the tree at the auction. She exclaimed about its beauty and then spent several minutes examining the toy decorations and quizzing Lucas about the various pieces of equipment hanging from the branches.

  “When I get done playing with them, I put them back on the tree. But after Christmas is over, then I get to put them all in my room. It’s a lot of toys, but Uncle Tate says I can keep them.”

  His eyes darted toward his uncle. Something about that serious tone with the hint of disbelief and that wide-eyed, searching look at his uncle filled her with concern.

  Viktor walked into the room. “Dinner is ready. What can I get you for beverage, Hannah?”

  She asked Lucas, “What are you having?”

  He grinned. “I like milk. And you know what? We always have lots of milk here. I got milk sometimes before my mom died, but not much after.”

  Viktor reached out and tweaked Lucas’s ear. “Big glass of milk for you, Lukie, already on table.”

  From the corner of her eye she saw Tate squeeze his eyes shut as he tipped his head to one side. He opened them on a nod as if to reassure himself, and a picture began to form in her mind. There was a story here with this little guy and she suddenly desperately wanted to know it.

  “Milk for me, too,” she said enthusiastically.

  The grin Lucas turned on her felt brighter than the sun. He reached out, tucked his hand inside hers and led her to the table. Where she proceeded to stuff herself on delicious pierogi, spicy sausage, a flavorful beet dish she was surprised she liked and the best stuffed cabbage she’d ever eaten.

  After dinner she played with Lucas and his fleet. There were backhoes, various trucks, a forklift, a track hoe and many other assorted pieces of equipment. He was impressed that she knew their uses and how to “drive” them properly.

  Picking up a shiny yellow bulldozer she said, “This guy reminds me of your uncle.”

  Tate appeared puzzled while Lucas grinned and asked, “Why?”

  “Because it runs over everything in its path to get to where it
wants to go.”

  Tate narrowed his eyes, opened his mouth to respond and then quickly shut it again. Then he grinned at her.

  Lucas popped to his feet. “Hey, I’ll be right back.” He briefly disappeared up to his room and returned with a plastic bin full of Legos, whereupon they assembled a “building site” and put the equipment to proper use, including “bulldozing” a ten-inch high Lego wall.

  Another hour passed quickly before Tate informed Lucas it was time to stow his toys so he could get ready for bed. Hannah helped him tidy up and handed him the toys one at a time so he could position them just so on the tree.

  After he’d put the last one in place, he stood a few feet away from her where she was seated on the floor. He pinned his gaze on her the way she’d noticed he did when there was something he wanted to say. She waited, wishing she could lighten this child’s heart somehow.

  She smiled and impulsively opened her arms.

  He lunged toward her and threw his arms around her neck. “Good night, Hannah. I’ll miss you.”

  She hugged him tight. “Good night, sweet Lucas. I’ll miss you, too, but we’ll see each other soon.” She kissed him on the top of his head. “Yum, you smell good—like bubble gum.”

  He nodded as he pulled away. “It’s special soap Uncle Tate bought me just for kids. And it won’t sting my eyes if I accidentally get it in there. I don’t like soap in my eyes.”

  “Me either,” she said. “That’s the worst. Then you have to go like this.” She squinted and made a funny show of rubbing her face. He doubled over laughing. Then he stilled and gave her another sideways glance. “Can you babysit me soon?”

  “I sure can.” She smiled and added a kiss on his cheek. “I’ll talk to your uncle about it.”

  He skipped over toward Tate and they headed for the stairs.

  Tate returned to the living room several minutes later as Viktor excused himself to take a phone call. Tate removed something from his back pocket and lowered himself onto the sofa a few feet away from her. Leaning forward he placed a red-and-black walkie-talkie on the coffee table in front of him.

  “Are we part of a covert operation?” she joked.

  A gentle smile softened his features. “It’s so I can hear Lucas if he gets scared. I wanted to put one of those baby monitors in his room, but he said it made him feel like a baby, so we settled on these. He has nightmares and my room is right next to his so I can hear him then, but we have these for when I’m not in my room.”

  Sympathy made her wince, but she took his comment as an opening to ask, “What happened to him, Tate?”

  He placed his hands on his thighs, splaying his long fingers over his knees. “I’m not sure exactly. I have a pretty good idea, though, and he’s...he’s had it pretty rough.”

  “I’ve picked up on that. He told me his mom died. That would be your sister?”

  He shifted in his seat and Hannah could see the sorrow in his eyes. “Yes, my sister, Lexie. She was quite a bit younger than me and a drug addict. She overdosed a year and a half ago. I was granted custody of Lucas last month.”

  “I’m so sorry about your sister. Custody from his father?”

  “No, his dad is dead. From his grandmother—our mother. She’s an addict, too, and treated him much worse than Lexie did. At least Lexie loved him, and before she relapsed I had thought—I’d hoped...”

  “Oh, Tate.” Hannah couldn’t imagine a mother—a grandmother, an aunt, or any family member for that matter—that didn’t love the children in her life with all of her being. “I can only imagine how difficult this has been for you, for Lucas. Poor little guy.”

  “Lucas really likes you. You don’t know how much that means because for some reason he took to you right away, but he’s very distrustful of new people. The fact that he held your hand was amazing, and then when he hugged you...” He looked up at the ceiling as if searching for words. When he met her gaze again his eyes were shining brightly.

  Running a hand over his jaw, he seemed to be gathering his emotions. “It’s unusual to say the least. He’s shy and he doesn’t trust people. For good reason. I’ve taken him to two different psychologists and neither one of them could get him to open up. Eight sessions and he barely said a word.”

  A spike of concern flowed through her. “He’s obviously a great kid in spite of everything. Of course, I can see the sadness in him, and there’s this hesitancy about him, too, as if he’s afraid to just jump in and be a kid.”

  He nodded his agreement. “That’s it exactly.”

  “Do you want to tell me about it?”

  “I do, but I don’t want you to think I’m trying to win you over with sympathy where Snowy Sky is concerned.”

  “Please don’t insult me. That’s business. We’re talking about an innocent child here. I adore him. You know that’s genuine.”

  He appeared relieved and satisfied with that response.

  “He got into trouble a lot with his grandmother. I’m sure for normal things kids do. She did the same with me, but then other times she would be way too lax. That kind of inconsistency makes you wary. I’m sure she used any excuse to lock him in his room, to get him out of her hair—whenever she was hungover, or so she could party with her buddies.”

  He continued talking and by the time he was finished, she could feel unshed tears burning behind her eyes along with a deep simmering anger. He shared Lucas’s experiences peppered with his own firsthand knowledge, the latter relayed very matter-of-factly.

  “Bits and pieces are still trickling out... His life with Lexie was better. At least she looked after him properly and kept him fed, and for the first few years when she was still sober I think things were okay. But then, gradually Lexie was pulled back into that life. At first I didn’t recognize it because I was away competing. When I talked to her she would lie and tell me everything was fine. Then I quit hearing from her. That’s when I found out she left Lucas with Penny. A few months later she was dead. Lucas was stuck with her for almost two years.”

  He brought his hands up and linked them behind his neck. He grimaced and she felt herself softening toward him yet again.

  He was obviously trying very hard to give Lucas the best life he possibly could. Hannah didn’t believe he was attempting to “win her over” with sympathy, but she felt it nonetheless. She was going to have to be very, very careful to keep her feelings for Lucas separate from her feelings for Tate.

  “He’s terrified of the dark. I know a lot of kids are, but his fear is extreme. Penny’s neighbor at the tenement they were living in told me that one night Penny told Lucas she’d be right back. Went out to buy some Cocoa Puffs... She hadn’t paid the power bill, ended up taking off on a bender, and Lucas was left alone in the dark and cold for three days. The neighbor knew this because on the fourth day Penny called and asked her to check on Lucas.”

  Hannah squeezed her eyes shut as a burst of rage shot through her bloodstream and left her hands shaking. “Why didn’t the neighbor call the police?”

  Tate brought his shoulders up into a helpless shrug, but she could see the angry tension radiating from him, as well. “I have no idea. The woman said she didn’t feel like it was any of her business, although she had plenty to say about that episode and a few others.”

  She knew it wouldn’t do any good to rehash the hows and whys. All that mattered was that it wouldn’t happen again. “What are you doing now? To...to heal? To...” To what? Move on? She didn’t even know for sure.

  “Even though it was pretty much a bust as far as the one-on-one sessions for Lucas went, I consulted a few doctors in Colorado before we came here to get some ideas on how to proceed. We have a recommendation for a child psychologist in Glacier City, too, if we need one. And a couple names in Anchorage. For now we’re just doing the best we can.”

  She nodded.

/>   “And Christmas—I want him to have a Christmas. He’s never had one. Gifts...” He gestured at the tree. “A home with a tree, Christmas movies and music, food, and a family. He’s never had any of that. I sent him stuff of course, but she...”

  Gifts. A horrible, unfathomable thought filtered through her brain. “She sold them, didn’t she?”

  “Yes. I sent her a check every month even while we were fighting for custody. I sent Lucas boxes of gifts and school stuff and clothing...” He trailed off with a disgusted shake of his head. “He barely saw any of it. The pawnshop owner she frequented told me sometimes she didn’t even open the packages until she brought them into his shop.”

  He kept his head down for a few long seconds before meeting her eyes again. “He said she would walk out the door with the money she got from Lucas’s packages and buy alcohol next door or meet her dealer across the street. The guy would watch her out the window.”

  “I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine.” But, in a sense, she could imagine. The anger she had felt for the drunk driver who’d caused her accident had been so intense, so consuming, she had believed she’d never be able to forgive.

  Eventually, with Dr. Voss’s help she’d come to understand the cruel, iron-clad hold of addiction. And she’d realized forgiveness was the only way she would ever truly heal and be able to move on. So she’d forgiven the alcoholic who’d nearly killed her and then left her for dead—as much as she could anyway. But she’d not forgotten.

  No, she’d never forget.

  But how could a grandmother choose her addiction over her own grandchild? How could she not treasure that precious child? How could anyone not want to see happiness shining in his eyes instead of that heart-wrenching trepidation that was so often reflected there?

  She suddenly felt guilty for taking even one millimeter of her mom’s Christmas spirit for granted.

  Impulsively, she found herself asking, “Why don’t you guys come over for Christmas Eve? To my parents’ house? My mom does Christmas like you’ve never seen before—games, food, baking, a white elephant gift exchange. Lucas would love it. You would all love it.”