Changed

by Alicia Renee Kline

  He shook his head, obviously wondering what was the matter with me. No one in their right mind would navigate an icy driveway in high heels when they could have gotten curbside service. Hell, knowing him, he would have carried me to the car if I’d asked him to. But no one had ever accused me of being in my right mind.

  “So, were you as shocked as I was this morning?” I asked.

  “About Blake and Chris? No, I knew about the ring when he bought it ten years ago.”

  “Okay, that explains the engagement, but what about the rush to the courthouse? I always figured your sister to be the type to want an event. Something on a bigger scale than even your wedding.”

  “For all practical purposes, the guest list wouldn’t warrant a huge bash. The people who would show up for her will be in this car. Chris doesn’t have that many people that he would invite, either.”

  “And his invitees include?” I pressed, pretending that I didn’t already know at least one of them.

  “His mom and dad. Will. Me. I guess I’ll just stand in the middle, since I’m there for both of them.”

  Lauren came out of Regina’s door, and we both watched her walk down the driveway and to the passenger side of the car. She had no problem navigating the concrete, unlike me. Perhaps Brian had salted the sidewalk before he went to work.

  “Hi,” she said as she sat down.

  “Your driveway’s a sheet of ice,” I announced. “You almost got to come and take me to the emergency room instead of the courthouse. And good afternoon to you, too.”

  I distinctly heard a sniffle from the front seat in response.

  “Good Lord,” I asked, since Matthew was handily ignoring it, “are you crying?”

  “No,” Lauren said, even as her husband opened his mouth to tell me the truth.

  “She’s a little emotional today,” he explained. “It’s the first time that we’ve left Sadie alone with anyone else.”

  “Don’t worry about it, sweetie,” I cooed, leaning forward in my seat to touch her shoulder. “Regina has everything under control. Better you leave your newborn daughter with someone like her instead of someone like me.”

  Matthew snorted. Even Lauren cracked a smile.

  “Now stop that. You don’t want to ruin your makeup. Consider it a test run for when you actually go back to work. Regina will be babysitting then, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “So just enjoy a few hours in the company of adults and remember what it used to be like.”

  “Matthew’s an adult.”

  “Just barely.” That comment came from him, not me.

  The remainder of the ride was filled with an easy silence. We’d just spent most of the previous day together and with my best friend immersed in motherhood, it wasn’t like she had a handful of new and interesting topics to pull out of her hat. Plus, I was afraid that if I opened my mouth, I’d either say something that would make her enter ugly cry territory or I’d inadvertently spill my secret.

  Matthew pulled the Camry to a stop in a parking garage that for people with sensible shoes wouldn’t have been that far away from the courthouse. Given the kind of morning I’d already had, I envisioned myself falling down and getting splattered in the middle of the road. But I pretended that I didn’t have a care in the world as I got out of the car.

  “Leave your cell phone in here,” Lauren warned me before I shut my door. “You can’t take it in the courthouse.”

  “Whatever.” I obediently dug through my purse and extracted the contraband, tossing it into the backseat. “Guess there will be no pictures of the blessed event. They really should have considered that before deciding on the venue.”

  We trudged uneventfully over to the courthouse, walked through security, and waited just inside the checkpoint for the rest of our party. We were the first ones there, or so it seemed. As soon as we stepped inside, Matthew’s demeanor visibly changed. I wondered how many times he’d been back here since he’d sat in a courtroom on the wrong side of the law. Lauren grabbed his hand in a show of support, but nothing was said on the subject.

  “Hello, Matthew,” a friendly female voice announced.

  I’ll admit it; it made me jump. The owner of the voice came over to where we stood. She was a parental looking figure, maybe approaching sixty years old or so. Following closely behind her was a gentleman that I would describe the same way.

  Matthew’s face lit up with recognition and the unease that I’d just witnessed was replaced with his typical brand of charisma.

  “Arleen, Gary,” he greeted the couple, motioning to Lauren, “this is my wife, Lauren.” Then he directed their attention to me. “And this is Gracie, our friend. Ladies, these are Chris’s parents.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Lauren and I said in unison.

  “Thank you for the card and the wedding and baby presents,” my friend added. “I know I already have, but not in person.”

  Arleen Taylor reached out and gave her what could best be called a motherly embrace. “You’re so very welcome. Matthew’s always been like a second child to us. It’s wonderful to see how happy you make him.”

  Lauren blushed at the compliment. It struck me as odd to think that this woman was implying that Matthew was like part of their family if Lauren had never met them before, but then I remembered more of the background. Chris’s parents had practically worshipped the ground that Blake walked upon from the way Matthew told it. They’d taken the breakup nearly as hard as Chris had. They’d quietly removed themselves from the picture, relying on Chris for periodic updates on their surrogate son. Though the Taylors had been invited to Lauren and Matthew’s wedding, they’d declined, not wanting to upset either Blake or themselves by being there.

  I wondered if they knew the whole story. I didn’t have to wait very long for my answer, as Blake and Chris arrived soon after. If I had thought the hug Arleen had given Lauren was maternal, it was nothing compared with the embrace she bestowed upon Blake. Within seconds, both women were sobbing.

  “It’s so good to see you, honey,” Arleen whispered, stroking Blake’s hair as if she was a child.

  I felt like I was intruding upon a moment that I shouldn’t be privy to. I positioned myself closer to Gary, who had maintained his silence to this point. He was apparently the strong, stoic type and I felt more comfortable in his presence than in the midst of the reunion going on beside me. Awkwardly, I turned away from the scene and took in my surroundings, which didn’t do much to ease my unrest.

  The first thing I saw was a pair of green eyes that only recently I’d become intimately familiar with. Will had been scanning the crowd for us, and naturally he’d picked me out of the group to focus upon. Our eyes locked for a split second, during which I felt fire creep up into my cheeks. I diverted my attention to my shoes, the suede miraculously unspotted by my earlier cavorting in the elements.

  “Looks like we’re all here,” Will said once he was within normal speaking distance.

  He acknowledged Chris’s parents with a nod. I supposed it made sense that he’d already met them. He’d had nothing to do with the whole Blake fiasco, so it wasn’t like he had ever had to hide from them. Up until recently, he didn’t factor into our tightly knit group at all. He’d been introduced slowly, once Chris had silently gained entrance. Now the whole set up was just starting to feel incestuous.

  Blake and Arleen composed themselves enough to become functional members of society and the whole of us made our way to the portion of the building where marriage licenses were granted and unconventional people got hitched. I purposefully stayed close to Lauren, while Will purposefully took up the back of the train beside Gary. Even still, I felt his eyes burning a hole in my retreating figure. I debated how much he remembered. Was he imagining me naked?

  “What’s up with you?” Lauren breathed into my ear when I shook my head to get the mental picture of him in the buff out of my head. “You’re acting weird.”

  “I couldn’t sleep last night,” I expla
ined with a shrug. “Then somebody woke me up at the butt crack of dawn to ask me to come to a wedding.”

  My answer was sufficient for Lauren, who probably still wasn’t quite herself yet anyway. I could tell that part of her brain was back at Regina’s house, wishing she could see what Sadie was doing.

  Blake and Chris split off from the group for a few minutes to fill out whatever paperwork had to be filed. We had to wait for what felt like an extended period of time before there was someone available to marry them. I seriously doubted that many people opted to go this route, but that the delay was amplified by the fact that I was desperately trying to pretend that Will wasn’t mere feet away from me.

  I was likely as pleased as Blake and Chris when their turn was called and the attention focused on them. Short and sweet, they exchanged vows, rings and a kiss and the deed was done. The way Blake beamed as she turned back to face us, one would have thought she’d had the entire celebrity wedding experience - horse drawn carriage, elephant rides and everything. Her smile was contagious, though, and I found myself grinning right along with her. I’d never seen her happier.

  “Let’s all go to lunch,” she suggested, “we’ll buy, since we’re going cheap on the reception.”

  Arleen and Gary bowed out of the offer, parting ways with us at the exit of the building. Part of me wished that I had driven separately so I could do the same, citing my commute back home to Indianapolis as an excuse. I half expected Will to opt out, claiming he had to work or something, but he didn’t. Sure, he’d pick now to be sociable. Maybe he thought it was in keeping with the ruse, but it did nothing to put my mind at ease.

  Before the suggestion was made that I could ride with Will to keep him company on the way over to the restaurant - ironically, the same one I’d picked him up at last night - I stuck like glue to Lauren and Matthew. Not that riding in Will’s Jeep would have been a fate worse than death, but I doubted that I’d be able to forget about our coupling hours earlier if I had him to myself. I was still in the heady, blissful stages of post-fucking.

  We’d missed the lunch rush and were a couple hours too early for the dinner crowd, so our party of six didn’t have to wait for a table. The greeter led us straight to a large curved booth in the corner of the establishment. I purposefully sat at one end, Will at the other, kept apart by the two married pairs between us.

  None of us ordered anything stronger than a Coke, which was fine by me considering that I’d probably still bleed alcohol as it was. But even so, I couldn’t resist asking everyone to join me in a toast to the happy couple.

  “To Blake and Christopher,” I said with a wink, recalling how their names had been read during the vows, “may you live happily ever after.”

  Blake glowed and stayed silent, while Chris took the bait I’d set out for him like I knew he would.

  “Christopher? Really?” he asked.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lauren give me a look of warning. Clearly, she was advising me to quit while I was ahead. For whatever reason - okay, I could probably list off about ten reasons - the two of them only semi-tolerated each other. Coming from her, the teasing would have likely ended with a drink spilled on her lap. But my viewpoint confirmed that the man in question was eating this up, practically egging me on.

  “I always wondered what Chris was short for. There are so many options: Christopher, Christoph, Christian.” I let my voice trail off as I tried to think of more possibilities, but I drew a blank.

  “So naturally you find out that it’s the most common one and you ride my ass about it.”

  I shrugged, smirking as I met his brown eyes head on.

  “That’s pretty brave, coming from someone whose nickname is longer than their given name. What’s with that?” He paused for dramatic effect, raising an eyebrow. “Grace.”

  “What did you call me?” I screeched, realizing too late that I’d intimated that he’d struck a nerve.

  “Oh Lord,” Lauren muttered beside me, “here it comes.”

  It didn’t matter if her commentary was directed to me or to Matthew, I was already launching into my memorized speech. Granted, Lauren had heard it several times when we’d worked in the same bank branch. I despised when people got my name wrong.

  “Grace,” Chris said again smugly.

  “That. Is. Not. My. Name.”

  “Sure it’s not.”

  “People named Grace are seventy years old and have blue hair.” I swung my attention over to Blake, who did have a streak of blue hair amid the platinum blond and gave her a look of apology. “And not by choice.”

  “So that’s you in fifty years. I fail to see the difference.”

  “My name is not Grace. My parents named me Gracie. I’ll prove it.”

  I reached down to grab my purse off the floor and rummaged around in it, past the toothbrush, the makeup and my cell phone until I finally produced what I was looking for. Triumphantly, I pulled my driver’s license out of my wallet, slapping the plastic card down on the tabletop. I slid it past Lauren, Matthew and Blake so that it came to a rest in front of Chris. He picked it up and studied it for a second.

  “See?” I huffed. “My legal name is Gracie. Just like on my birth certificate. Or my Social Security card. Do you require another form of identification? I’ve got a credit card, too.”

  “No, this will suffice,” Chris confirmed.

  I expected him to hand it back after scanning it briefly, but it remained in his hands for an extended period of time.

  “What? I promise it’s authentic.”

  Chris shook his head as if to bring himself back to reality. “No, I believe you. It’s just that I’ve never seen anyone look this good on their driver’s license before. Not even Blake.” His wife elbowed him and he rubbed his arm before continuing. “Ow. This is practically a head shot.”

  I felt heat creep up in my cheeks. The whole point of me whipping out my government issued ID hadn’t been to fish for compliments. And because it was Chris saying the words, I knew he wasn’t trying to hook up with me. He was being sincere, and sincerity always got to me even when a line didn’t.

  “Will,” he said, drawing his friend into the conversation, “you’ve seen more driver’s licenses than anybody here. What do you think?”

  I knew what I thought. I wanted to hide under the table. But I settled for holding my breath as I watched Will take my driver’s license in his own hand. He stared at it like his green eyes were committing it to memory. One could read so much into that.

  You’re really pretty.

  His words from last night echoed in my head. I attempted to communicate with him telepathically. I didn’t want him to say that, almost as much as I didn’t want him to say something along the lines of “if you think that’s hot, you should see her naked”.

  “Yeah, that’s a pretty good picture,” he assessed noncommittally.

  The air left my lungs in a rush, though I doubted anyone else noticed. I was quiet about it. And yes, he had used the forbidden word, but in a benign context. I had to give him credit for his flippant answer. Totally believable, like he didn’t know me any better than he had twenty-four hours ago.

  The look he gave me as he slid the ID back across the table suggested anything but.

  Chapter Four

  Indianapolis was my comfort zone. It was almost like the mere view of the downtown skyline could rid me of thoughts of what had happened upstate. That and the fact that Will hadn’t made any contact since we’d left each other at the restaurant, me climbing into Matthew’s car and him leaving in his Jeep.

  Besides, December was a busy month for everyone. It seemed like most people at the bank had saved their vacation days for the end of the year. Not me. I took advantage of the opportunity to pick up extra hours, using the overtime earnings to pay for the meager lot of Christmas gifts I purchased on a yearly basis. With Sadie coming into the world, my list had grown by one, even if she wasn’t old enough to care. I still needed to butter her up and pro
ve to her mother that we could coexist peacefully.

  The holiday came and went, our traditional evening spent at Lauren’s father’s house. Doug had relished the time alone with his granddaughter while Lauren and Matthew had run off to stop by her mother’s grave. I’d stayed in his kitchen, hand washing the dishes in the sink. Not an altogether bad way of spending the day.

  And so it was New Year’s Eve and I was alone in my apartment. In years past, I might have headed up to Fort Wayne to hang out with Lauren and Blake, but this year was different. The two of them were paired off and all about doing their own things. I couldn’t blame them.

  I was content to plop down on my couch and watch the ball drop in Times Square on the television with millions of other viewers. I stripped my work clothes off as soon as I hit the door, changing into a pair of running pants and a t-shirt. I scrubbed my face clean and piled my hair up on top of my head, ready for a night in.

  I settled down in front of the television, cross-legged on the cushion, my knees resting between my remote control and my cell phone. Like most twenty-somethings, the smartphone was an extension of my arm, even when I didn’t expect it to make a peep.

  But chirp it did. I rolled my eyes, convinced it was one of the other tellers trying to coerce me into going out with them. I’d already turned down the offer to meet a group of coworkers at the bar just down the street from the bank. From previous experience I knew they could be persistent, especially when a few beers had already been consumed. If it carried on too long, I’d just power down the cell.

  My eyes still on the TV, I reached across and grabbed my phone. When I swiped the touchscreen, I froze.

  The text was definitely from one of my contacts, but not any of them I’d expected. My eyes registered the initials “WD”, how I’d entered Will into my address book. I slammed my eyes shut, prying them open slowly like I was hallucinating. But the initials were the same, leading off the simple message that filled my screen and made my hands shake.