Silent Love (Historical Christian Romance)

by Barbara Goss

  She smiled. “Could we ride Daisy and catch the train that just passed?”

  Simon rubbed his forehead. “Wait a minute! Maybe if we can go back and ask Ned how far it is to a town…”

  “Or," Caroline interjected, “buy another horse from the Indians. I noticed they had quite a few.”

  “I knew I had a good reason to marry you,” he winked.

  7

  Simon drove the nearly empty wagon, and Caroline rode Daisy into the Indian camp. A few Indian women worked at cleaning skins, but dashed into their wigwams when they saw them drive up. The big Indian came out again.

  Simon greeted him with a curt nod, “Ned!” he said indicated to the Indian that he wanted Ned.

  The Indian turned and spoke loudly in his language, and after a slight wait, Ned appeared.

  “Looking for more wives?” Ned asked, again spitting tobacco.

  Simon smiled. “No. One’s enough for me. We, Simon indicated Caroline who sat on Daisy, need your help.”

  Ned looked at him curiously.

  “We seem to be stranded and our wagon was ransacked. All our supplies are nearly gone. Jake and another man stole our supply wagons. Where’s the nearest civilized town?”

  Ned scratched his head. “There’s Laramie. It’s a railroad town. It’s the closest, and about eighty miles as the crow flies.”

  “Would there be any horses here for sale?” Caroline asked.

  Ned spoke with the big Indian. They went back and forth for a bit before answering, “For a price.”

  Simon rolled his eyes. “Caroline, can I have a word with you? In private?”

  She turned Daisy closer to where Simon was standing, and he whispered, “We’ll need money if we go to a town to buy things. They’ll want a ridiculous price for a horse. Heck, they charged me seventy greenbacks for you.”

  Hands on her hips, she whispered, “That’s all I’m worth?”

  “I would’ve paid more for you, but not for a darned horse.”

  Simon and Caroline whispered for quite some time, trying to come to a decision, when Ned interrupted them, obviously impatient to be done with this business.

  “Look, it’s almost sundown. Why don’t you two stay here with us tonight, and decide what you’re going to do? You can park your wagon over there,” he pointed. “Or you’re welcome to share my wigwam.”

  Simon looked at Caroline for an answer.

  “We’ll stay in our wagon. We need to sort through what little supplies we have left, anyway.” She bit her lower lip and addressed Ned while looking at the big Indian. “Are we… um, safe, here?” she asked coyly.

  Ned laughed. “Very safe. These aren’t killing Indians. These Indians work hard, grow their own food, and hunt. They have no use for the white man, but they wouldn't harm them, either.”

  Caroline smiled in relief, and they pulled their wagon off to the side and climbed inside. “Now what?” she asked Simon.

  “We should have borrowed another blanket.”

  “At least we have plenty of room,” she said, trying to lighten the mood.

  Simon held his head in his hands and groaned. “I’ve lost my freight!”

  “I’m sorry, Simon. It’s all my fault for wandering so far from the train.”

  He smiled slightly. “No. It's my fault. I’m the one who sent you off. If I hadn’t found you, I would never have forgiven myself. Those wagons were my future, but they are just things. You're a person, and have become… well, just as valuable to me. ”

  She reached over and gave Simon a hug. Simon squeezed her back, tightly.

  “All right. Where and how do we sleep?” she asked, pulling away from him.

  It’s a warm night. I think we’ll be fine,” he replied. “We still have our bundles of clothes. We can bunch them up for pillows and sleep on the wagon bed. It’s hard, but so are we."

  “I’m game,” Caroline said. It had felt so wonderful to be in Simon’s arms. She kept telling herself that his squeeze was just him expressing his relief at having found her, and nothing more. It took all of her willpower to end the hug. If she hadn’t, she’d have come close to letting her feelings show, and she worried that might scare him away. It seemed everyone in her life tended to shy away from her neediness.

  “Yo! White man!” a masculine voice yelled shortly after dawn. Whoever it was, he was pounding on the side of the wagon with his fist.

  Simon jerked awake and found himself surprised to discover that his arm was stretch out over Caroline's sleeping form in a protective gesture. He pulled his arm away the moment Caroline began to stir.

  “Yes!” Simon yelled, jumping up and looking out the back of the wagon. “Oh, good morning, Ned.” His sleepy eyes focused beyond Ned to see the big Indian with another white man standing by his horse.

  “Good news,” Ned said. He spit out a chewed wad of tobacco.

  Caroline peeked her head out from the wagon.

  Ned nodded to her and touched his hat.

  “This gentleman,” Ned pointed to the man with him, "is from your wagon train. He’d like a word with you.”

  “Frank Gibson,” the man said, shaking Simon’s hand. “I’m a scout from the train. Jesse sent me to check on you. I saw your wagon as I searched the trail. As you know, we broke off into three trains, and your wagons were in the first. We couldn’t help but notice your two supply wagons barreling past us, and then the scout for the second train reported seeing your wagon on the side of the road—”

  “And ransacked our wagons,” added Simon.

  “Not by our trains. They all rode by thinking you were making repairs and would catch up with one of the other trains. When you didn’t show by nightfall, Jesse sent me to check.”

  “Jake and Henry must have grabbed all they could before they left, then,” Simon thought aloud.

  “So what will we do now?” Caroline asked, running her fingers through her sleep-tangled hair.

  “Well…“ Frank scratched his bearded chin. “You’ll never catch up by wagon. I see you have a horse. Any chance of buying another from these Indians?” He pointed to a nearby corral.

  Ned nodded when Simon looked to him for help.

  “How will we carry our remaining supplies? ” Simon asked.

  Ned answered, “You leave us the wagon, and I’ll give you a horse as fair trade. We can use it for our small farm. I’ll also supply you with a couple flour sacks to carry your supplies.”

  “Thank you,” both Simon and Caroline said at the same time.

  “I don’t have a saddle, so I hope one of you can ride without one,” Ned added. He pointed to the barrel in Simon’s wagon. “Don’t suppose you can tote that on a horse. What’s in it?”

  “Wheat flour. It’s nearly full.”

  “Tell you what— you leave the whole barrel, and I’ll have the wife pack you plenty of dried buffalo meat and a few ripe tomatoes. We can put the barrel and the wheat to good use here.”

  Caroline and Simon cleared whatever they could salvage from the wagon, including several tins of sardines, a few tins of fruit, some soda crackers, and their clothing, bedding, buckets, tools, and Simon’s tent.

  Frank, the scout, offered to ride the Pinto without a saddle. Caroline and Simon followed on the other two horses, their sacks of possessions tied to the saddles. Before the sun went down, they'd rejoined their wagon train. Simon thanked God out loud, for the horses were sweaty and tired. He doubted they could have kept the pace much longer. He left Caroline to talk to her friend, while he rubbed down and settled the horses.

  Caroline sat upon a log with Ella and told her the whole story. When Simon joined them, Ella offered to lend them blankets, and invited them to put their tent within the shelter of their wagon. Ella and her husband, Charles, shared their meager supper of beans and biscuits with them. Their teenage son—also named Charles, but called "Chuck"—helped Simon erect the tent.

  “You two make such a handsome couple. How long have you been married?” Ella asked.

 
Caroline hesitated in order to give Simon a chance to answer in case they'd both answered at once with a different number of years. Rather than answering, Simon just looked to her and raised his eyebrows.

  “Just a year,” offered Caroline. Then she realized why Simon hadn’t answered. Being an honest man, she remembered he'd said he hated telling lies. This whole fake marriage thing couldn't help but wear on his conscience. She heard Simon praying each night before going to bed. He seemed to rely heavily on his prayers and Bible reading. Caroline wondered if it was God and the Bible that made him such a good man.

  “Newlyweds, practically,” Ella replied. “Well, goodnight, and if you need anything, give us a yell. We sleep under the wagon, now that the nights are warmer." They each waved, and crawled under their wagon.

  Simon motioned for Caroline to enter the tent first. They resumed their distance, but not as distant as the last time they lay inside the tent. They remained silent, and soon Caroline heard Simon’s rhythmic breathing, and knew he was asleep.

  Caroline lay awake, sorting out her thoughts and feelings. She felt closer to Simon than she had to anyone else in her life. Could it be love, admiration, gratefulness, or simply loneliness? Oh, how she loved whenever he touched her, even though she always pulled away, because she didn’t want to show him how much she cared. If she did, she felt sure that her desperation for companionship would scare him away.

  He had already told her his plans for the future. He didn’t want to settle down until he was financially secure, and now that he’d lost everything…

  She looked over at him, sleeping so soundly on his back, his arms under his head, and she yearned to huddle against him and lay her head on his chest. She sighed, inched closer to him, and then she inched even closer. He was sound asleep. He’d never know. She’d done it last night in the wagon. Sometime last night she’d felt his arm go around her and she'd felt so secure

  Once Caroline’s back was resting against his side, she felt warm and content, and fell asleep quickly.

  When Simon awoke he knew he was in trouble, even before he'd opened his eyes. He feel Caroline pressing up against his side, and he could feel her soft breath against his cheek, so he knew she lay facing him. Her right arm was extended across his chest, almost wrapped around his neck. Simon said a silent prayer for strength. He knew right from wrong, but he was a virile, young man, and he needed all the help he could to pry himself away from her.

  He prayed like never before, and even made a slight move to get up and leave the tent, but when he moved, she sighed, and held him tighter. With no other options, he slowly, and regretfully, untangled himself from her grasp, and slid, silently, out of the tent.

  Caroline moaned. Half awake, she felt as though she’d recently lost something. She opened her eyes, to see that she had, as Simon had gone.

  Since they no longer had a wagon, they rode, side by side, on horseback, in front of the train. Simon managed to buy a saddle from a man who'd broken his arm in a river crossing and couldn’t ride. It felt good to be ahead of the dust instead of behind it, for a change.

  Two days after Caroline's kidnapping, before they nooned, Frank, the scout, rode up and began to converse excitedly with Jesse. When he was done, Jesse approached Simon.

  “We found your wagons. They're up ahead about two miles, with dead and dying oxen."

  “And the men?” Simon asked eagerly.

  “Walking about a mile up the road. I’m sending some men to capture them and take them over to Laramie. There’s not much law in that town, but it’s the closest, and they do have a jail.”

  Simon nodded. “And the wagons? Do they look unharmed?”

  “Frank didn’t say, but we’ll soon be there, and you can see for yourself.”

  Simon smiled at Caroline, hopefully.

  As they rode, Caroline heard Simon praying out loud, in the same way he did, each night at bedtime.

  A sad sight greeted them when they finally caught up to Simon’s wagons. With the wagon were three dead oxen, and one wounded so badly, it had to be shot.

  “Look at their backs,” he said, pointing to the oxen. “Whipped raw.”

  Caroline turned her head.

  Frank and another man pushed Henry and Jake toward Simon. “Here they are. Is there anything you want to say to them before I have them locked up?”

  Simon rubbed his forehead. “Just take Jake.”

  Caroline swung around and gaped at Simon in surprise.

  “Are you certain?” Jesse asked.

  “Yes,” he answered with assuredness. “I’ll need someone to drive my wagon, and I have a feeling Jake did most of the dirty work. Am I right, Henry?”

  Henry’s mouth hung open in surprise, but he managed a nod.

  “Take Jake away,” Simon said with a wave of his hand. “Henry, I want a word with you in private.”

  After Henry explained his part in the kidnapping and theft, Simon nodded. “As I thought. You will drive the wagon, and make no more trouble. You will hunt for food if you want to eat, because we're running low now. Do you understand?”

  “When will I have time to hunt if I’m driving?” Henry asked.

  “You will do it instead of eating at nooning. Now get your backside up on that wagon, and never, ever treat an animal like you two treated these poor creatures. And if there's any further trouble from you, you’ll be off this train, one way or another. Understood?”

  Henry nodded. “Yes, sir…and thank you.”

  Jesse and Frank helped Simon discard the dead oxen and replace them with fresh teams.

  “So you’re running low on food?” Jesse asked.

  “Yes, sir. They took nearly all we had, and I don’t see much left.”

  “We have some mountainous country ahead, but when we reach Fort Hall, if you have money, you can buy supplies. There may also be some Indian villages along the way where you can purchase or barter for items, as well. But rest assured—I won’t let you two starve. Don't care much if Henry does, though.” He tipped his hat and left them.

  After the train had traversed the steep mountains, losing wheels and axles, and a man who'd suffered a fatal heart attack, pushing his heavy wagon up a steep rocky ridge, they reached a flat plateau on which to camp for the night. Both Simon and Caroline were exhausted. She was helping him unhitch the oxen when Jesse approached them.

  “Bad news, I’m afraid, Simon.”

  Simon stared at him for a moment and then asked, “Now what?”

  “I’ve heard the Shoshone are not doing well, and have little to nothing to offer settlers, and with the area rife with antagonism, I vote we stay as far away from Fort Hall as possible.”

  Caroline saw Simon’s face drop in disappointment, but he said nothing.

  The brutal mountain terrain had been rough on the wagons, the animals, and their own backs. It slowed their progress down, as well. They passed many ox skeletons, and still more graves. They were tired and achy all over. This had definitely been the worst day since they'd started the long trek.

  Caroline was too exhausted to even to think about cuddling up with Simon that night. They both fell asleep in the tent as soon as they laid down their heads. Since both of the wagons were full of stock, they had to sleep in the tent, together, at night.

  After breakfast, Simon and Caroline took inventory of their food. If they were lucky, they'd have enough food to last them four or five more days. Henry had given them a few rabbits and a prairie dog, but the hunting had grown scarce in the mountains, so unless they spotted some mountain goats, they were out of luck. If they couldn’t stop at Fort Hall, they might very well run out of food.

  “At first I thought these purple mountains beautiful.” Caroline sighed. “Now, I think them ugly as sin. I hope I never see another, the rest of my days.”

  Simon cuffed her chin in jest. “You’ve been a wonder, Carrie, never complaining, and always ready to help. There’s only been one day since we left Independence that I felt sorry I signed you on.”
<
br />   Hands on her hips, she frowned. “And when was that, Simon Miller?”

  He smiled mischievously. “The first day. When I ate those horrible pancakes.”

  Caroline prepared to swat him playfully, but then she noticed Jesse approaching their wagon again.

  “Almost ready? We’re really going to push hard the next few days. I've some good news, too. In about six or seven days we'll reach Fort Boise, and you'll be able to buy whatever you need there.”

  “Jesse, so far we’ve only been able to accomplish ten miles a day, if that. We’ll be out of food in five days, tops.”

  “Don’t worry. We’ll be traveling along the Snake River all the way to Oregon. There'll be plenty of fish to be caught. Make a fishing pole for Henry and set him to the task.”

  Simon sighed with relief, and shook hands with Jesse, thanking him.

  When they reached the Fort Hall area, the men watched carefully for the rebellious Shoshones. They'd also lost about half of their wagons since the point at which the people going to California had broken off and headed southwest.

  Henry caught fish and Caroline cooked them over the fire. They had run out of everything else, hours before they reached Fort Boise. Once there, Simon and Caroline shopped for necessities. They were pleasantly surprised to discover that the prices weren’t as high as they would have thought, being out there in the wilderness, and he'd been able to hold onto most of his money.

  Some wagon trains didn't travel on Sunday, but Jesse made it clear it was life-or-death that they reach the mountain passes into Oregon before the snow fell. Many families complained, but were grateful when Jesse conceded a bit, and allowed the families an extra hour to worship, and Simon always joined them. Caroline usually stayed back to mend clothing and straighten the wagon. Sometimes she went down to the river and washed herself and their clothes.

  She vowed that the first thing she was going to do when she reached Hattie’s was to take a hot bath!