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by Cole, Martina

  Scanlon looked around the room. ‘You all know the score. Anyway, he said that Bianca, his daughter, was never the same again. She couldn’t eat or sleep. It really affected her. At one point she had the sawn-off aimed at her head. A month later, she cut her wrists. Killed herself.’

  No one spoke, they all seemed to be holding their breath.

  ‘The girl killed herself? Over Lance?’ This from Lil. ‘Why am I not fucking surprised?’

  ‘That’s why he ain’t here, ain’t it? He knew what you were going to say. Has he fucking packed up, Annie? Has he left?’

  Patrick stared at the old woman and she was shaking her head in distress. ‘No, course not . . .’

  ‘Fuck Lance for a minute, Pat. So what happened, Mr Scanlon?’ Lil was sitting up in the chair once more and her face quieted all of them.

  ‘Sammy was distraught and went after Lance. He said he found Lance with Colleen that morning, watched them talking and, after Lance had said goodbye to Colleen, he went up to him and told him what had happened to his girl. He wanted Lance to at least acknowledge what he had done, but Lance just laughed at him and said she was better off away from him, that she was ugly and no one would ever have wanted her anyway. When Sammy pulled a weapon on him, Lance laughed, beat him up and drove off laughing. He said it was the final straw, he couldn’t make any sense out of it all. He knew that Lance had no care or interest, had simply thought it was funny. Lance had found Bianca’s death amusing. It drove him mad.’

  Scanlon sighed. ‘Sammy drove after Colleen then, to ask if she knew where Lance was going and she had said she didn’t. Before he knew what he was doing, he had talked her into getting in the car, and he tried to explain about his daughter, thinking she might be able to make Lance understand what he had done. But Colleen got frightened and tried to get away and somehow, in the tussle, he killed her. He then drove back to his house and buried her in the garden. He waited, expecting to be caught, wanting to be caught, in fact. But no one ever put two and two together. He thought Lance would have been the one to bring it all out.’

  ‘That is fucking rubbish.’ Annie was shouting now.

  ‘Donny Barker confirmed his story and he also confirmed that Lance had met him that day and bragged about seeing Sammy that morning and how he had laughed at him. He remembers it so vividly because it was the day Colleen went missing.’

  It was true. They all knew that, even Annie.

  Lil couldn’t believe what she was hearing, even though in her heart, she knew it was true. Lance had bullied the man, as he always bullied everyone, and had finally sent someone over the edge at last.

  Lil looked at her eldest son then. ‘I told you, didn’t I? I said he had something to do with it. I knew it, I just knew it . . .’

  No one spoke, it was as if a bomb had exploded among them. *

  ’All right, Lance?’

  Donny Barker was all nervous smiles and Lance walked to the bar in the corner of the room and poured himself a drink.

  ‘Bit early for you, ain’t it?’

  Lance swallowed the brandy quickly and looked at his friend.

  ‘Did you get the tickets for me?’

  Donny nodded. ‘Course. The bloke is going to deliver them in a while. Why?’

  Lance shook his head nonchalantly. ‘No reason. I just wondered, that’s all. Did you get me money out?’

  Donny poured himself a vodka and Coke and, adding ice and lemon, he sat on the edge of his desk and said quietly, ‘Is everything all right? What’s this all about? All this fucking hurrying . . .’

  Lance stood up and said in a loud voice, ‘You got my fucking money or what, Donny?’

  Donny automatically leant back; he could see the nervousness that would soon turn to violence. Lance was obviously in a state.

  ‘Calm down, Lance, for fuck’s sake. What is wrong with you?’

  Lance sighed heavily, trying to control his temper and not doing a very good job of it.

  ‘The money is all here, OK? The tickets are being delivered by Karen Hines. She booked them herself, OK? So fucking calm down.’

  Lance knew he was acting suspiciously but he was unable to relax. Once he had the cash and the tickets he would calm down.

  ‘What are you going to Northern Ireland for, anyway? Hardly a fucking holiday destination, is it?’

  ‘Who are you, Donny, the fucking holiday police?’

  Donny laughed but he knew Lance would be taking a plane somewhere else from there. The question he wanted an answer to was where. He knew he had money, they all did, and he knew that if he was going on the trot then it meant he had an inkling that something was up.

  Lance was a fucking leech and he knew that, had accepted that; his worry was whether it was something he should be worrying about.

  Lil looked around her and saw her sons sitting there, all trying to understand what they had just heard.

  Lance, the child she had never wanted, had never cared for, had destroyed everything that they had held dear. He had caused every person in the room heartbreak. Had ensured that not one of them had ever known a real day’s peace and now, she knew, thanks to him, they never would.

  And poor Patrick, he had tried to be a good brother, had tried to make up for her lack of warmth, her inability to love her own son by loving him enough for both of them. Christy was crying silently and Shamus was holding on to him, comforting him.

  Colleen and Christy had been so close. The other kids had loved them, but they were the product of Patrick Brodie; he and Colleen had been Brewster’s, a man who had not cared for them and had been the reason Patrick Brodie had died like he had. Together they had been strong, had always relied on each other for strength and love.

  ‘Go home, all of you.’ Patrick sounded so calm and so normal that they all automatically did what he asked.

  They knew what was going to happen, but no one said it, of course.

  ‘You OK, Mum?’

  Lil smiled at them all; only her little Shawn would want to stay with her when Patrick said to go. He was a brave little fucker and she loved him, as she loved them all.

  ‘I’m fine, darling, get yourselves off home and let us sort this out, eh?’

  As they were leaving, she said quietly, ‘If anyone asks, we were together tonight, right?’

  She glanced at Scanlon and he nodded.

  ‘Good. Now get off home, all of you.’

  ‘I want to stay here, Mum, can I?’

  Kathleen was looking at her with her usual sad eyes and Lil couldn’t deny her.

  ‘Course you can, darling, if that’s what you want. All right with you, Mum?’

  Annie nodded and Lil felt a moment’s sorrow for her. Her baby, her boy, was finally unmasked for the shite he really was.

  They all left without a further word, understanding the situation without needing to be told. As she watched them leave, Lil consoled herself that out of eight children, seven had turned out all right.

  At least they knew when to leave.

  ‘Mr Scanlon?’

  He didn’t say a word, just left with the others.

  Once they were alone, Lil finally broke down. ‘Take Kathleen upstairs, Mum. I need to talk to Patrick.’

  Annie stood in the room, her small body bristling with annoyance. ‘You can’t believe that, Lil. Whatever Lance is . . .’

  ‘Oh, fuck off, Annie. You know it’s true as well I do. His absence alone should fucking tell you something.’ Pat’s voice was angry and Annie knew that he had never had much time for her, but he was always respectful to her, as he was to everyone.

  ‘Come on, Kathleen, let’s get upstairs and put the TV on, eh?’

  She was determined not to cause any more upset.

  ‘Pat, can I tell you something?’

  ‘Not now, Kathy, I have a lot of things to sort out, darling . . .’

  His voice was sharper than he intended and Kathleen flinched at his tone.

  He went to her and held her hands gently in his. ‘Later,
eh? Me and you, we’ll have a big conversation, but at the moment I have to do a few things. I need to find Lance . . .’

  She smiled then. ‘I know. I want to tell you that he is going on holiday, ain’t he, Nan?’

  She looked at Annie expectantly.

  ‘What you on about, you silly girl?’

  Lil stood up then and Annie knew she had been rumbled, but she still couldn’t tell them what they wanted to know. Lance was still her boy and he had promised to send for her when the time was right. He was everything to her, no matter what he had done.

  ‘What the fuck is she on about, Mum?’

  ‘Oh, Lil, you know what she’s like. You can’t listen to what she says. She’s off her fucking tree half the time.’

  Kathleen sat down then and said, with more lucidity than anyone had ever given her credit for, ‘You helped him pack! You told him he had to go away. Like you always tell him what to do.’

  Kathleen looked at Lil. ‘I hate living there but no one stops them from making me stay there. I don’t want to go into a mental home and they want to put me in one now, so she can go with him.’

  ‘No one’s putting you in a mental home, Kathleen, I promise. Now tell us what is going on.’

  Pat was kneeling in front of Kathleen and she smiled at him sadly. ‘They will, Pat, they told me, and, if I go in a nuthouse, I’ll die. I can’t go in the nuthouse.’

  Annie sighed and tutted loudly. ‘Well, shut up then, you stupid girl . . .’

  ‘Why don’t you shut up, Mother? Come on, Kathleen, darling, tell us what is going on, yeah? I swear to you, darling, nothing will happen to you. You can stay here, you can always stay here, love, for as long as you like, but you never wanted to, did you?’

  ‘I did, but I wasn’t allowed to. But now Lance is going away and Nanny Annie is going with him when he is settled.’

  ‘She is talking out of her arse.’

  Annie was nervous and Kathleen saw that.

  ‘I am not. I am not talking out of my arse and you can’t say that to me any more. Lance is going away tonight and I don’t have to be scared any more. She took my baby you know, Mum. Her and Lance.’

  ‘What baby, Kathleen?’

  Lil’s voice was quiet and Kathleen put her head down and started to cry.

  Annie sighed heavily. ‘What fucking baby? There was no baby. Are you going to tell me you are listening to this fucking nutcase?’

  Kathleen was out of her seat and, grabbing Annie by the neck, she screamed, ‘Don’t you call me that. Don’t you dare call me that. You took my baby away and you put it in the fucking bin.’

  She looked at Patrick and said angrily, ‘You were robbing the post office, remember? Lance told me that if you knew about the baby, you would put me away, no one would believe me. He gave it to her. And she put it in the bin, Pat, my little baby. I wasn’t allowed to make any noise in case the police came and you all got arrested . . . Then Mum would have been cross and made me go away.’ She looked at Annie.

  ‘Tell them, tell them. Now they are going and putting me in the nuthouse, that’s what Lance said to me. The nuthouse, because you all hate me and don’t care about me, but you do. Promise me you won’t put me in the nuthouse, promise me! I don’t like kissing Lance, Mum, and Nanny says I am telling lies but I’m not. Colleen knew, Colleen knew because she saw him. And Colleen went away. Lance made her go away.’

  She was crying now, sobbing.

  ‘Fucking hell, Mum. Fucking hell. What the fuck is going on with this fucking family?’

  Annie was standing with her hand over her mouth and Lil’s blow knocked her to the floor.

  ‘You bitch, you fucking evil bitch. You knew all along what he was like and you made me guilty about him. And you knew, you always knew...’

  ‘Keep her here, Mum. Even if you have to fucking beat her brains out. Don’t let her near a phone, don’t let her warn him, right?’ Patrick was shouting.

  Lil nodded. ‘You go, mate, she ain’t going nowhere.’

  Lil held her daughter in her arms as she saw Patrick walk from the room.

  Lance was nervous, the small bar was filling up with people and Karen was still nowhere to be seen. The small bar was part of a private drinking club that was frequented by Donny’s main workforce and some of the clientele were civilians who liked to feel they were on the borders of the criminal fraternity. It was a nice little place, men brought their birds here, never their wives, and they knew they were safe enough from prying eyes. Donny prided himself on his business acumen; he had taken the bar in lieu of a debt. It had earned him ten times the original amount and also earned him the goodwill of many a Face who needed somewhere to rest a weary head without Old Bill on their backs. He was watching the door with as much interest as Lance and he knew that this was going to be a hard old night, but he would survive it.

  ‘How much longer is she going to take?’

  Donny shrugged, his ugly face screwed up in irritation. ‘I don’t know, she’s doing us a fucking favour. Hang on and I’ll ring her again.’ He walked away, dialling a number on his mobile.

  ‘You’ve rung her twice already. What is she, fucking thick?’

  As he spoke, the door opened, and Lance knew then that Donny had sold him out. The man put his phone away and said sadly, ‘You’re scum, Lance, and I always knew that, but this time you went too far.’ The bar was cleared within minutes of Patrick attacking Lance with a baseball bat. The police were called in when a passerby heard the screams. By then, Lance was unrecognisable as a human being.

  Epilogue

  ‘You all right, Mum?’

  Lil sighed heavily and her laughter had a painful edge. ‘No, actually, I’m not, but you knew that, right?’

  She was so jolly, so full of life, it was hard to believe she was dying. ‘Oh, Mum, what will we all do without you?’

  Lil yawned. It was a deliberate ploy to annoy her sons.

  ‘You’ll all survive, shit floats, remember, just look after your sisters for me, OK? Especially Kathleen. She will always need to be cared for, and no matter how much she annoys you, or gets on your nerves, you remember me now, as I am, on me death-bed, asking you for this one favour, right?’

  Christy laughed, and Patrick saw how much he looked like their mother, whereas he, on the other hand, was like his father, the spit of him apparently, as everyone seemed intent on reminding him at every available opportunity.

  ‘Guilt is a great tool when you need something done.’

  Patrick grinned. ‘Death-bed promises are like pie crusts, meant to be broken.’

  Lil laughed feebly. ‘I mean it, boys, this isn’t a joke. Eileen’s got Paulie, but Kathleen has no one, remember that. Remember what she’s been through.’

  ‘Mum, I’ll take care of them all, don’t worry.’

  Lil knew he would, but it didn’t help her. She wasn’t really happy about knowing her life was almost over, even though she was ready to go. But she knew she had to convince them; even though she was desperate to let it all go, was ready for the big sleep, she was still not sure that they were.

  ‘I am ready, you know, ready to go. The pain is taking over now, and I need to know you are settled, happy in your own ways.’ They sighed together, and she could feel their pain as they were all feeling hers. She lay back on the pillows and watched them. She loved to see them together; they were close, all of them. Really close.

  ‘Mum, we are as sweet as a nut, so stop worrying about us.’ Her Christy, her boy. Shawn, Shamus and Eileen. They all loved each other, in their own ways.

  ‘Patrick, are you there, mate?’

  ‘Course I am, Mum. What do you want?’

  She sighed heavily, then she took his hand in hers, and he felt the weakness and the fragility of her. She was so ill, and so tiny it made him want to cry. She was as small as a child, the weight had dropped from her, not that she had ever been that big in the first place.

  ‘Patrick, tell me the truth, yeah?’

  ‘Oh, M
um, course I’ll tell you the truth. What do you want to know?’

  ‘What happened to Lance in the end? Did me mother claim him?’ She looked at Ivana who she knew would tell her the truth even if Pat wouldn’t. And she nodded almost imperceptibly.

  ‘She took him, Mum, as far as we all know.’

  Eileen blew her lips out noisily in disgust. ‘Fucking old cow! She’s only been asking if she can see you.’

  Everyone rolled their eyes in annoyance. Trust Eileen to open her big trap.

  Lil smiled then, knowing what they were all thinking, and grateful to Eileen for being so honest. Lil looked like her old self, as she had looked years before, when they were small and she was still strong enough to care for them all.

  ‘I’d like to see her one last time, on me own. I need to talk to her, make my peace before I go.’ She looked around the room at her children. Her hearts.

  Jambo was there too, and she pulled him towards her, grabbing his hand and letting him know how pleased she was that he was there for her. ‘You made me so happy, you gave me my youngest child, and for that I will always be grateful. Me and you understood each other, didn’t we?’

  He nodded and she kissed his hand.

  ‘Make them bring me mum, will you? I won’t rest otherwise.’

  No one said a word, and she knew they wouldn’t, had no intention of discussing it, so she changed the subject. ‘Have you heard any more about the court case, Pat?’

  He shrugged. ‘They can’t prove I done it; the evidence mysteriously got burned in that fire they had a while ago. Apparently, me and three drug dealers are all in the clear, no evidence, no fucking court case.’ Pat laughed heartily.

  ‘Here, Mum, I also heard through the grapevine that the cocaine that was supposedly burned in the aforementioned fire had actually been removed beforehand. The British judicial system, eh, Mum? Best in the world, or so they say.’