Double Obsessions

by Charlotte Sloan

  “When my mom died, I just…I don’t know. I fell apart, I guess. I was sleeping less, drinking more. I even started experimenting with drugs, but that didn’t last long. Still…by the time I kind of came back to myself everyone had started expecting an asshole.”

  Jazmin didn’t speak. She just nodded in sympathy and let Caleb continue.

  “It was like the whole world was watching, waiting to see how I would screw up this time…so I gave them what they expected. Eventually I started seeing myself the same way they did, and eventually there was nothing left of who I used to be. I’d become the man created in the lowest point of my life, and there was no way to climb out.”

  “I can still see a good man, Caleb.”

  “Can you?” He smiled without humor, and Jazmin could see genuine pain in his eyes.

  “A good man is sitting here with me right now, trying to find his way back to himself. It’s never too late, Caleb.”

  “I know. I’m just not sure I can stop acting like everyone expects me to…”

  “Sure you can. Just remember that this is your life. To them you’re nothing more than an occasional headline, or a clip on the evening news. You’re important, sure…but it isn’t their life. It’s yours.”

  “You’re a wise woman, Jazmin.” The words were said with humor, but there was a vein of truth in the statement.

  “I try, Caleb.” She smiled warmly at the man across the table from her.

  Yes, she was definitely in trouble. The Caleb O’Connell she’d met before inspired her lust…this new one, though…he had broken through her defenses in one evening without ever even touching her. She ought to cut her losses now, before he could break her heart. Instead she found herself flirting, touching him lightly as she laughed at something he’d said.

  Chapter Seven

  When he kissed her lightly, it was as natural as breathing to open to him, to let him in. The kiss gentled in slow degrees until she wasn’t sure where Caleb ended and she began.

  Then he broke the contact to gently pepper her mouth with kisses. He pulled the shirt off her head and explored her stomach with his lips and tongue before moving on to her bra.

  He removed the thin lace garment and pressed kisses to the undersides of her breasts before using his tongue to lightly circle her small, dark nipples. When he finally took one into his mouth and suckled it gently she thought she might cry from relief. He guided her hands to her breasts and she pinched her nipples lightly, rolled them between her fingers as he gently removed the rest of her clothes.

  She reached for his shirt then but he moved back and softly lowered her hands.

  “Not this time, Jazz. Tonight is about you, the woman who helped me remember what it is to feel.

  He carried her to the bedroom and laid her gently on her bed. She didn’t have a stitch of clothing on, while he was still fully dressed. Somehow it heightened the pleasure as he leaned over her to kiss her mouth, her neck, her collarbone.

  If the last time they made love was a thunderstorm, this was a calm spring rain. It was slower, and softer…and it reached farther than pounding rains that run off too quickly ever could.

  He tasted every inch of her skin. He encouraged her to touch her clit, her breasts, while he tasted her and watched her with lustful eyes.

  Then, finally, his mouth found her pussy. He licked in soft, broad strokes before he plunged into her again and again with his skilled tongue. Then he moved up to her clit. When she was so close that she felt like she had to move her hips or die he sucked gently on the swollen nub again and again, prolonging her climax until she couldn’t remember her own name.

  Only then did he finish disrobing and slip inside her. His lovemaking was as gentle as the foreplay had been. He moved slowly against her g-spot until she came in the hardest, longest orgasm of her entire life. Only then did he find the rhythm that would bring him release.

  He didn’t withdraw once they were done making love—this couldn’t be called anything else but that. He stayed inside her, moving his hips slowly in a way that made her passion sensitized body shudder as he kissed her slow and deep.

  Finally he withdrew. He turned her so that he could spoon her from behind, and she fell asleep to the feel of his fingers running gently through her hair.

  The morning after was a completely different experience than their last one. She woke up to Caleb wrapped around her, stroking his hand up and down her arm. They stayed in bed like that for a while, content to just be next to each other without speaking. Then they finally made their way to the kitchen for coffee and conversation.

  “So, a bachelor’s degree in journalism, huh?”

  Jazmin couldn’t help but smile. “Yep. Summa Cum Laude.”

  “So why just go to a state college if you’re capable of a GPA like that?”

  Yesterday morning she’d have lit into him for the comment, but she sensed he was asking out of honest curiosity, so she answered.

  “I was accepted to Stanford, but I didn’t have anywhere near enough money to attend. I was able to get some scholarships for a local school, though. It was enough combined with the two jobs I worked. Ivy League would have been nice, but I’m a firm believer in dealing the hand I’ve been dealt…unfortunately that hand didn’t include a full-ride scholarship or parents who could afford to pay my way.”

  “That must have seemed selfish of me. I’m sorry, Jazz.”

  She was secretly thrilled at the intimacy of the nickname. “Don’t be. It landed me the job of my dreams, after all. In the end the diploma is just a piece of paper on the wall. I have what I need.”

  “No, come on. Let me have the ass chewing I deserve.”

  “I don’t think you deserve that, Caleb. I do think that you’ve been dealt a damn fine hand. You have too much talent to waste it just because you think everyone expects you to behave like a spoiled shit of a jock.”

  “You’re right.” The words shocked Jazmin. She’d been braced for the same sullen silence she’d received the other day. Instead he was looking at her like her word meant something. “I’m turning over a new leaf, starting today.”

  He moved toward her then. He ran his fingers through her hair as he claimed her lips with his own. She couldn’t take this tenderness after last night. She could not fall for this man. There was no way he’d stay with a no one like her.

  “You need to go, Caleb. I’ll give you a call later, but…you need to go.”

  He looked like he wanted to argue as his gaze searched hers. Whatever he saw in her eyes, though, had him agreeing to leave after giving her one last, lingering kiss.

  Chapter Eight

  As usual, Vince’s malice filled gaze locked on Caleb the moment that he and Jazmin stepped onto the court. Vince’s hatred of Caleb had only grown with each passing day since he’d been laid out by him in the parking lot. It was disturbing and funny all at once to watch him seething at a man who had probably forgotten Vince existed the moment they’d parted ways. She’d come to expect anything and everything when it came to Vince’s opinion of Caleb, but his next words still surprised her.

  “I bet he’s pussy whipped.”

  “Excuse me?” Jazmin tried to pretend she didn’t have any idea what her squirrely cameraman was talking about.

  “O’Connell. He’s been quiet as a damn church mouse for weeks now. I bet he’s getting some that’s so good that it’s keeping him home and sober at night.”

  “Right. Because the only way a man can change is through good sex. Maybe he’s just ready to turn over a new leaf.”

  “Whatever. Whether he’s getting some new pussy or not, the guy’s still an asshole.” Vince turned his attention toward the court and away from Jazmin. She almost enjoyed the tense silence that settled between them, although she didn’t like the speculative looks that Vince kept throwing her way when he thought she wasn’t looking.

  She had to admit that Caleb was playing amazingly well. He was more aware of the other players around him, and more of his shots s
ank into the basket. He even treated his teammates with genuine warmth that made Jazmin smile. If he kept it up like this he could easily become one of the best point guards in the pro league. Though she didn’t care for Vince, she couldn’t help but wonder if he was right. Could it be that making love to her every night was the very thing that was keeping him out of trouble? She wanted him to change for himself and no one else, but the thought that his feelings for her could keep him in line was a bit heady.

  The Spurs won—their third consecutive win—and Caleb had caught her eye and given her a sexy little wink on his way to the locker room. Heat filled her stomach as she saw the warmth in his eyes and it made her remember their last night together. Jazmin thought that nothing could spoil her lighthearted mood as she and Vince made their way to the van with their equipment after the game…She’d thought wrong.

  “So I know why you’ve been puking at half the games we cover, Jazmin.”

  “Excuse me?” Alarm shot through her like ice and electricity all at once.

  “I know you’re knocked up.”

  She couldn’t think of a reply. He only smiled at the silence that confirmed his statement.

  “I’ve been thinking to myself…what would the network do if they found out that their reporter had a bun in the oven?”

  Jazmin’s blood ran cold. You couldn’t just fire someone because they were pregnant in this day and age…but the station didn’t need to. She was a contract employee, so firing her was as simple as saying that she just wasn’t needed any more when her term was up, and she would be out of a job. She felt confident that she’d be offered a longer contract within the next month or so, though. She just needed to hold out until then. She’d felt sure she could hide her secret until she’d secured steady work. She had to hide it. No one wanted a pregnant sports reporter.

  Maybe in a perfect world things would be different, but the truth was that her viewers were primarily male. And with men…with anyone, really…sex was what sold. The pressure to be pretty, to be slim and sexy was great. Things couldn’t fall apart now. She might not ever break into the pro reporting circuit again if she had to take a break for too long. She was lucky to have gotten this far in the first place.

  “What do you want, Vince?”

  He smiled and looked her up and down.

  “Just something that you’ve given lots of other men for free. Why don’t you let me back over to your place after I turn in the footage to the station tonight, and we can…talk…about what it will take for me to keep quiet and not tell anyone at the station.”

  “Jesus, Vince. Surely there’s something else.” She felt vaguely nauseous just thinking about his hands on her skin, and she was sure it had nothing to do with morning sickness.

  “Oh, no. There is only one thing you have that I need.”

  She regretted the words even as they left her lips. This, she realized, was a whole new low. It was one thing to know that your career was, at least in part, founded on your sex appeal. It was another thing entirely to trade sex for a job. If she went through with this she would be nothing more than a well-educated prostitute with several thousand dollars in student loans.

  She thought about the unborn child inside her, and about how she would be able to support him or her if she lost her job. She might not sell her body for her career…for her child though? There was no question. Nausea churned in her gut as she looked in his eyes and tried to let him see all the hatred and loathing that she felt for the entire situation.

  “Come on over, Vince. I’m sure we can work something out.”

  Jazmin really couldn’t be sure who she hated more in that moment: Vince or herself.

  Chapter Nine

  Caleb smiled in anticipation as he remembered the sexy little smile that Jazmin had given him after the game. He dialed her number and waited to hear her voice when she picked up the phone.

  “Hey Caleb.”

  “Hey yourself. So is it safe to assume that I can come over tonight?”

  “I don’t know, Caleb…”

  “Why not? We’re good together, Jazmin. You know we are. Let me bring dinner to your place. Say, nine o’clock?”

  “I just…I just can’t tonight, Caleb. I’m sorry.”

  “Why not…was it something I did, something I said?”

  “No, it wasn’t. I just…I have plans. I have to go, Caleb. I’m sorry. Call me tomorrow, and maybe we can work out something for tomorrow night, okay?”

  “Yeah, sure Jazmin. If that is what you want, it sounds good to me.”

  He was lying through his teeth, of course. It didn’t sound good to him at all, and it was obvious that Jazmin was hiding something. Still, he resolved to give her space.

  One hour later, though, when he was pacing back and forth in his apartment, he decided that he could give her space after he went to confront her and to see why the space was needed in the first place. Surely after she’d blown him off after two of the best weeks of his life she owed him at least that much.

  He headed to the car before he could talk himself out of it and drove across town to her door. He was surprised to see her slimy camera man leaving the news van and making his way up to her door. He trailed behind him though. He could just wait until the cameraman finished his business with Jazmin and left. He was surprised to see Jazmin open the door and let the little weasel into her apartment. He strode forward and knocked on the door.

  Jazmin’s pretty face froze for a second when she saw him before he watched all emotion fade from her normally expressive features.

  “I think you need to go, Caleb. I told you tonight wasn’t a good night.”

  “I know you did, but we need to talk, Jazmin. I just wanted to know why you were pulling away from me, but now…why is your cameraman here, Jazz?” He couldn’t keep the hurt suspicion from his voice, and he hated it.

  “It doesn’t matter, Caleb. You really need to go. Please, please go.”

  She tried to close the door in his face then, but he forced it open. He had seen the way the cameraman treated her, and the animosity between them. Something was wrong with this situation, and he wasn’t leaving until he figured out what it was.

  “The bitch told you to leave, man.”

  “Shut up, Vince.” The antipathy was thick in her voice, but she still didn’t change her tune. “He’s right, though. You need to leave.”

  “Why, Jazz? Isn’t what we have worth more than whatever your business is with this little jerk?”

  Hope and hurt warred in her expressive mocha eyes, and he somehow felt like he was in the wrong even when her insistence on spending the evening with another man was like someone tearing the heart from his chest and kneeing his balls all in one fell swoop.

  “Holy shit! You’re the pussy that’s keeping him in check? Oh, this is too good.” Vince turned to him with an empty smile. “You need to leave, pretty boy. Jazz here wants to fuck a real man tonight.”

  Caleb tried to remember the reasons that he was keeping clean and calm. With Jazmin insisting on throwing him out for this little shit, not a one of them could come to mind. So he walked up to him.

  And punched him.

  Again, and again, and again.

  He stopped, though, when Jazmin cried out for him to. Even though she’d been about to have sex with another man, he stopped simply because she asked him to. He wasn’t sure if that made him sensitive or just plain pathetic.

  “I’m making sure this hits the papers, man. I heard that you’re one bad decision away from throwing away your career, and this was it, man. This was it. I’m headed for the newspaper office right damn now.” Vince continued to rant as he left the building.

  Caleb couldn’t bring himself to care. He ignored him and looked at Jazmin, silently begging her to explain why she’d wanted someone else over him. Even without a single thing resolved, she shuddered in relief when she came forward and wrapped her arms around him. He returned the embrace and led her gently to the couch, where he sat and pulled her
onto his lap.

  “Talk to me, baby.”

  She took a deep, shaky breath. “It was blackmail. Vince was trying to blackmail me to…to sleep with him. And I almost did. I think if you hadn’t shown up I really might have gone through with it.”

  “What does he have on you, Jazz?” He would make it go away, whatever it was. He would fix it for her.

  “I…I’m pregnant.” Oh. Well. He couldn’t make that go away.

  “Why is that blackmail material? Is the father married or something?” They’d only been together a few short weeks, so it couldn’t be him. He wasn’t sure what it said for his sanity that he almost wished it was.

  “The father isn’t even in the picture, and he wasn’t married. It’s the station. I’m up for a contract renewal soon, and there’s no way that they’ll renew it if they find out I’m pregnant. It’s like you said, a pretty face and a nice body are required for this job. If I can’t deliver those every time my contract is up for renewal then I’m out of a job…there aren’t many people who find a fat pregnant woman sexy…and I understand that you probably want to leave now, and that’s okay. You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

  She was so sweet and pretty and vulnerable…Caleb would have been running, even a week ago. Today though? Today he just wanted to hold her, kiss her…make her problems go away.

  “Oh I think there will be plenty provided that the pregnant woman is you…I’ll do whatever I can to help you know…an exclusive interview maybe? I might be able to get some of the guys to promise the same.”

  She didn’t even comment on the interviews. “You’re…you’re not going to leave?”

  Caleb couldn’t stop himself from kissing the lips that held that surprised little smile, even if he’d tried. He didn’t.

  Chapter Ten

  Everyone was in an uproar. It was the second quarter, and Caleb O’Connell was on the bench after playing some of the best games of his career in the preceding weeks. Jazmin had been tasked with finding out why. It soured her stomach to think that she was betraying both her employer and the man she cared about deeply with her silence. Vince hadn’t gone to the media, but Caleb had told his coach preemptively that he’d beaten up a cameraman for one of the local stations, and now he was sitting on the bench.