8
When I got on campus Monday morning, Logan wasn’t around. It was more disappointing than I expected. Kim and I sat in the library and I told her all about the movie with Logan. She was absolutely giddy when I told her we were officially together. She wanted every detail but I couldn’t bring myself to say any more than ‘we made out.’ Thankfully, that was enough for her.
“I’m so happy for you, Beth—Liz. Whatever. You totally deserve a hot guy like Logan. And he’s so sweet. I wouldn’t have guessed he’d be so awesome.” She pulled out a light pink lip gloss and gestured for me to pucker up while she dabbed some on my lips. “The way Becky talked about him, I assumed he’d be totally arrogant and kind of an ass.”
Ugh, Becky. The ex. I hated thinking about her. She was exactly the opposite of me in every way with her blonde hair and giant boobs. She was one of those cheerleaders that wore her uniform practically every day, as if she needed to constantly remind the rest of us of how superior she was. If she was his type, I had no idea how long he’d stay interested in me.
“Yeah, I can’t imagine him being an ass to her. But then again, he was kinda rude when he was talking to Amanda.” That brought up my other source of frustration.
“When was he talking to Amanda?” Kim was finishing some homework before first period.
How could I have left out that part?
“Oh, you’re not gonna believe this. Apparently, Amanda lives with him most of the time. Her parents are friends with his parents or something and she’s always at his house.”
The look on Kim’s face was priceless. Her jaw hung open and her eyes were about to pop out of her head.
“Shut. Up.” She leaned in to whisper her fury. “That bitch does not live with your man!”
Between her words and her expression, I couldn’t help but laugh. She was adorable when she was being protective. She relaxed a little but was still furious.
“You know she’s like in love with him, right? She’s been following him like a puppy since he dumped Becky. It’s pretty pathetic actually.” Kim pulled an insulated mug from her bag and took a drink of the coffee concoction Maddie made for her every morning. It smelled delicious.
“Yeah, I know.” The uneasy feeling was back. “But, there isn’t much I can do about it. They’re family friends. And he swears he’s not into her.”
“Well, obviously not. But still. I wouldn’t trust her around my man.” She looked deep in thought when her eyes bugged out again. “Where does she sleep?”
Excellent question. “No idea. I’m sure not with him...probably a guest room or something. I don’t know if I should ask.” I was doodling on the back of my geometry notebook. “I don’t want to seem insecure.”
Just then, my phone buzzed from my bag.
Where are you?
It was Logan.
In the library.
Thirty seconds later, the heavy doors burst open and Logan was there. His eyes scanned the room until they met mine. The quick grin that took over his face made me sigh, even from across the room. He came straight to me and lifted me out of the chair by my elbows. Holding me tightly, he inhaled into my neck.
“Mmm, I missed you. I wanted to drive you to school this morning.”
I froze. What did that mean?
He noticed my reaction and pulled back.
“What’s wrong, love?” He searched my face then looked me over from head to toe. “Is everything okay?”
I took a deep breath and tried to control my voice, completely ignoring that he called me love. “What do you mean you wanted to drive me to school?”
“I waited at the corner where I dropped you off.” He sat in the chair I’d been in and pulled me onto his lap. “I got there at six forty-five but you must have already left.”
Shit. This is why it would never work. I shouldn’t have let him drive me anywhere. “Logan, you promised.”
I hated to sound whiny but I was ready to cry and didn’t want to do that either. “I told you not to go anywhere near my house. Please respect that.”
“I just hate the idea of you alone on a bus full of strangers.” He rubbed my back until I relaxed against his chest.
“I know but I’ll be fine. I’ve been doing this for years. Please don’t go out there again.”
I felt his chest rise as he held his breath. The bell rang before he had the chance to respond. “We better get going.”
He lifted my chin with his finger and gave me a sweet kiss. It was quick but sent the message that he wasn’t agreeing to anything.
Kim and I went to P.E. and debated the pros and cons of asking more questions about Amanda. I knew I’d get the details eventually but my curiosity made me think it needed to be sooner rather than later.
Logan was waiting for me outside the locker room when we walked out. I waved to Kim as he pulled me to his chest and backed me up against the wall. I was completely surrounded by his tall frame as he hovered over me. “Now I can give you a proper hello.”
I took a breath that sounded like a gasp as Logan lowered his mouth to mine. He held my neck with one of his strong hands and wrapped the other around my waist. My body arched into his as he devoured me. He was an amazing kisser. I didn’t have much experience but I couldn’t imagine anything being better than Logan’s moist lips smashed to mine. His tongue caressing mine. His heartbeats synching up with mine. Logan being mine.
When he finally pulled away, we were both breathless. Our foreheads were pressed together as we tried to slow our breathing. “I want to show you something at lunch.”
It took me a second to form words to respond to him. “What is it?”
He kissed my nose then pulled back. “It’s a surprise.”
We started walking to humanities.
I hate surprises. I’d had very few good surprises in my life. I knew Logan wouldn’t intentionally do something bad but he had no idea what I was dealing with. I could have given him some warning but anything I revealed would just lead to more questions that I couldn’t answer. I had to play along or end it and I definitely wasn’t ready to end it.
“Should I be worried?” I teased. Part of me was a little excited about what it could be.
“Nope. I’m worried you won’t like it but you have nothing to worry about. If you hate it, I’ll...take care of it.”
What the hell did that mean? It sounded so ominous. “Now I’m really worried.”
He smiled down at me. “It’s just a silly project I worked on over the weekend. It’s not a big deal.”
Project? “Your sketch?” Did he make something for me?
“You’ll see.” He squeezed me then dropped his arm from my shoulder as we walked into class.
The anticipation was killing me. Once I knew it was something he made, I couldn’t wait to see it.
We watched a movie about the renaissance period and Logan twirled my hair the entire time. It was such an intimate gesture that I felt myself falling for him harder with every brush of his finger over my spine. He pulled my desk up against the side of his and my head moved to his shoulder without my knowledge. It was like I was just drawn to him. I couldn’t get close enough. I never felt as safe and protected as I did with Logan.
By the time the bell rang for break, I’d forgotten all about Amanda. We were heading to my locker when she fell into step beside Logan.
“Hey, hun. You left early this morning. I wanted to see what you’re doing for lunch.” She didn’t even acknowledge me but that was okay. I didn’t have anything to say to her either.
Logan turned to her but kept walking, pulling me tighter to his side.
“Yeah, I wanted to pick up Liz.” He leaned down to place a light kiss on the top of my head. When I looked up, he had an adoring smile on his face. “And we’re busy at lunch. Sorry.”
“You went to her house?” She seemed shocked. I don’t know why she would think it was a big deal. She didn’t have any idea why I kept my home life so private.
“Kinda. Why
?” Logan stopped walking and looked at her with the same confusion I was feeling.
“I’m just surprised she would want you to see what she’s got hiding there.”
What the fuck was that all about? “Excuse me?” I said, pulling out of Logan’s arm and rounding on her. If she had something to say, she needed to say it to my face. I wasn’t about to let her start any rumors about me.
“Don’t play dumb, Beth. It’s not as cute as you probably think it is.” She pulled her phone out of her purse and started swiping at it like she was bored with our conversation. “We all know why you gained so much weight and then had to “disappear” for a few years.”
I’ve never been a violent person but I wanted to beat the shit out of that bitch. Was she actually suggesting I left school to have a baby? I was speechless.
“What the hell are you talking about, Mandy?” Logan said, pulling me back against his chest and rubbing his palms over my arms to soothe me.
“Just be careful with this one, Lo.” She gave me a look that oozed disgust. “She comes from trash and I wouldn’t want you to get dirty.”
Logan let go of my arms and grabbed the back of Amanda’s cardigan, dragging her about ten feet away from where we stood. I could see her cowering under his glare. Whatever he said to her wasn’t nice. She looked like she was about to cry. When he released her roughly, she turned to me and quickly composed herself. If looks could kill, I would have dropped dead on the spot. There was no question how Amanda felt about me. It was exactly the same way I felt about her.
Logan blocked my view of her and pulled me into his arms. “I’m so sorry about that. She can be a total bitch sometimes.”
I didn’t say anything. I just took slow breaths into his chest and tried to calm my pounding heart. He gently nudged my shoulders back to make sure I was okay. When I didn’t meet his gaze, he ducked down and forced me to look at him. “You don’t have a baby at home, right?” He was teasing me but I could hear the crack in his voice that told me he wasn’t sure.
It was so ridiculous, I had to laugh. Finally releasing some of the tension in my body, I looked him square in the eye.
“No, of course not. I had no idea people thought that. It’s actually pretty funny.” Really funny when you considered I was only thirteen when most people saw me last. “I haven’t even—”
Oops, TMI.
“You haven’t what?” He waited for me to finish but I just shook my head. “Don’t worry about her. I think she still has a thing for me but it doesn’t matter.”
“It would matter a lot less if she didn’t live with you.” We started walking to the front where everyone hung out.
Logan laughed and kissed my cheek. “She doesn’t live with me. She stays at my house but I barely see her.”
Right.
Kim was at my side as soon as we approached the flag pole. “What happened?” She tried to pull me away from Logan but he didn’t let me get far. I felt his finger hook into my belt loop, holding me within his reach.
I looked over my shoulder to swat at him but his dorky grin was too cute for me to argue with. I turned to Kim with a dorky grin of my own. “What are you talking about?”
Allie and Jen were beside her.
“I saw Amanda yelling at you and Logan dragging her away,” Allie said. “Are you okay?”
I’d already forgotten about Amanda’s tantrum. I was just glad Logan took my side and didn’t question her further.
“I’m fine. She’s just pissy because she likes Logan.” I glanced back again and saw that he was talking to the guys so I unhooked his finger from my jeans and walked a few feet away from them.
Kim, Allie and Jen huddled around me. “She said the rumor was that I got pregnant and left school to have a baby or something. Can you believe that?”
I waited for everyone to laugh or be as appalled as I was but they just looked uncomfortable.
“What?” I waited for someone to speak. When no one did, I turned to Kim. “Tell me.”
“Well, I might have heard something about that but I didn’t think anyone actually believed it. I thought it was a lame joke.” She hugged me. “I’m sorry she said that. She’s just jealous.”
“It’s fine.” It wasn’t Kim’s fault for not telling me. It would have just hurt my feelings and I was in a pretty dark place when we moved. I probably couldn’t have handled that kind of humiliation.
“Are you girls coming with us at lunch?” Logan was at my back. He crossed his arms over my chest as I leaned on him. He wasn’t feeling me up but he could definitely feel me. I think I stopped breathing for a few seconds.
Kim perked right up. “Sure. Are we going off campus?” Her eyes flitted from his forearms, which were resting over my breasts, to my face. She was probably wondering if I was going to pass out or run.
“Yeah, I want to show Liz something.”
“Oooh, a surprise!” Kim clapped her hands real fast and bounced.
“I don’t usually like surprises so this better be good,” I said, turning my face up to Logan’s.
He kissed me lightly, smiling against my mouth. “If you don’t like it, I’ll make you something else.”
“Promise?” I had images of iced cookies or a friendship bracelet in mind. Although, neither would require a trip off campus for him to give it to me.
“Promise.” He turned me around by my shoulders and pulled me into a deep kiss. Everyone around us faded away as my world honed in on Logan Cooper and the things he did to my insides. If he wasn’t holding me in those thickly muscled arms of his, I would’ve melted into a puddle at his feet. I was so screwed!
Austin grabbed a huge camera from the trunk of his car as we all piled out into a field of brown weeds. “Ladies, first.” He waved Kim, Allie and Jen ahead while Logan held my arm to stop me.
“I don’t want you to freak out or anything.” He was more nervous than I’d ever seen him.
“Well, now I’m starting to.” I looked in the direction that everyone was heading but didn’t see anything to worry about. The field was just open space that backed up to the highway with a huge sound wall stretched out in both directions.
Logan tugged a piece of my hair and I looked back into his eyes. “I just couldn’t stop thinking about you and I wanted you to know how much I like you.”
“Okay.” More than being nervous, I was starting to get really self-conscious. What if he made some weird sculpture of me out of mud or something? I would be mortified for myself and for him. I groaned. “Let’s just get this over with.”
“Well, when you put it like that...” He laughed and pulled me forward, pointing out random plants to our right as we crossed the barren land.
As we got closer to the group, I felt everyone staring at me. I looked to them and saw that Austin had his camera pointed at me. Kim looked like a proud mama watching her baby walk down the aisle. I had no idea what they were doing so I turned to Logan for direction. He stood behind me and turned my shoulders so I was facing the sound wall.
It took me a second to figure out where to look but when I finally saw it, I gasped. With my hand over my mouth, I stood in shock.
In pink and white bubble letters that had to be at least four feet tall was my name, spray-painted on the wall. This wasn’t something you’d see a gangster tag with a sharpie just to be rebellious. This was art. Each letter was perfectly aligned and outlined in black with shading that looked like light was glimmering off the edges.
I’d never really paid attention to graffiti, and certainly wouldn’t have expected Logan to be the type of guy to do it, but as I tried to wrap my mind around it, I realized how beautiful it was.
“You did this?” I could barely choke out the words through the lump in my throat.
“I know it’s silly but I just wanted to do something...big.” He chuckled and moved to my side.
“But how?”
“With a big ladder and a lot of paint.”
Randy snorted. “And a friend that went to
three different Home Depots for more of that paint.”
“But, I thought you didn’t show people your artwork.” I looked Logan in the eye. Every time I tried to sneak a peek, he distracted me with his mouth. “I don’t.” His eyes dropped to my lips and I could see them change from shy to lustful. “But this seemed like a worthy exception.”
It might not have been the right reaction but it was the sweetest gesture anyone had ever made to or for me and I was completely blown away. To see my name so large and in public was surreal. I couldn’t hold back my tears.
“Hey, don’t cry.” Logan pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
“Why me?” I wiped my nose with the inside of my sleeve and pulled back, patting my eyes to keep the puffiness down.
“Do you hate it?” His tan face had an unhealthy pallor to it. It broke my heart to see him vulnerable.
“I love it.” I did. It must have taken hours to create something so precise. I couldn’t imagine doing something like that for anyone and I never would have expected him to do that for me. No one had ever made me feel memorable or worthy of taking risks. Risks were made in spite of my well being and happiness every day but never for me.
As I looked back at my friends, I saw they were just as blown away as I was. I realized that I did matter to some people. There were people that did go out of their way to do things for me and that truly cared.
I smiled and turned toward my wall again. That’s what it was from that point forward. My wall.
“Really?” His relieved grin was adorable.
“Really.” I pulled Logan down by his shirt and kissed him loudly on the lips. “When did you have time to do this?”
“We came out here on Saturday night. It didn’t take too long.” He shrugged.
“Isn’t this illegal?” He probably thought I was appalled by the idea of him doing something against the law. Maybe a part of me was but a much bigger part was thrilled that he was publicly announcing his feelings for me.
The Outside Series - Complete Trilogy: Books 1-3 Page 7
