Last Man Standing

by Vance Huxley

  “Patty, round up enough guards to deter any idiot thinking of stopping a convoy. Maximum weaponry with the minimum guards. I want as much space as possible available for the wounded. Line up the biggest SUVs Caddi brought with him because they’ll have the best suspension, and minibuses for the stretcher cases.” Harold started stripping weapons from a dead Hot Rod. “Collect Hot Rod weapons, armoured vests and helmets. We’re going shopping.”

  “Beth’s?” Patty looked around at the shambles, at people still carrying in or helping the walking wounded. “Antibiotics?”

  “Everything we need, I hope, but I’m also taking the worst of the wounded who can be moved. If not, by the time Lenny gets to them they could be dead anyway.” He paused at Patty’s doubtful look. “You don’t think the Barbies will go for it?”

  “Make the bribe big, very, very big. I’ll make sure they understand the other part, about how we’ll react if they don’t let the patients come home.” She turned away, calling out for help in rounding up as many Hot Rod weapons as possible, everything but firearms. Another group set into stripping clothes from the bodies, especially boots, helmets and anything reinforced or padded.

  Lenny didn’t hesitate when Harold spoke to him. “I’ve got at least ten I can’t move, maybe more. I might save half the worst of the wounded, but doing so will mean a dozen others might die. Don’t worry, I’ll pick the worst wounded who’ll survive the trip. At least they’ll get a real doctor.”

  “You’ve done pretty well, Lenny.” Harold looked around the hospital, at the wounded on mattresses on the floor and at Patricia and her helpers rushing from one to another. “There’s plenty of us owe you a life.”

  “But I’m still only a barely trained paramedic, when all’s said and done.” Lenny called Patricia and they started making a list.

  * * *

  Ten vehicles set off in the end, led by Harold in Caddi’s personal vehicle, a Cadillac Escalade. Everyone knew the vehicle and who usually drove it, which should prove most of Harold’s story. That would be handy, but more importantly the big vehicle carried a lot of wounded.

  The gangster wouldn’t have appreciated the blood on the seats, or in the back, but the wounded appreciated the smooth suspension. Caddi was past caring, just a well-scrubbed stain on Harold’s bedroom floor. The rest had been thrown on the heap of bodies along with the whole bed and mattress, because Caddi pissed and shat and bled all over it while Mercedes beat his head to pulp with the butt of the .38. The brains over the pillow and her shoulder showed that the Killer Queen had been in charge, and hadn’t stopped until she was sure.

  Alfie followed Harold in a big SUV full of more wounded. There were six more of the biggest vehicles behind him including two minibuses, followed by the pickup. The Barbies would like the rearguard, Cooper’s GTi with Patty at the wheel. Even bewigged maniacs should respect the sheer firepower the convoy carried, once it drove out of sight of the Army and the rifles and shotguns came out.

  The GOFS sentries spotted the slow convoy entering the road leading to the Barbies, so by the time the cars reached the other end, Gofannon waited with a dozen men. All were carefully pointing what they carried somewhere else, because this road belonged to Orchard Close. The slow perusal of the vehicles, especially the one Harold stepped out of, stopped at the end. All the GOFS stared, followed by a round of low, reverent swearing.

  Patty had declared she’d done with hiding weapons, because some arses didn’t understand subtlety. The Demon wore her sabre, a Rambo, a lovely inlaid Glock handgun in a Tomb Raider thigh holster, two more pistols on her belt, a cut-down pump action shotgun slung over her shoulder and crossed bandoliers of shotgun and 30-30 ammo. Although her baby’s custom tasselled sheath hung over her other shoulder, Patty didn’t need to hide the actual weapon now that Caddi was dead. She held the beautifully engraved 30-30 Winchester underlever across her chest, finger on the trigger. Her three passengers all carried two handguns, Rambos, sabres, and pump action shotguns to underline Patty’s message.

  “The Barbies will wet themselves.” Gofannon stared in admiration. “Vulcan will be pissed off that he missed her.”

  “Caddi was pissed off at her, among others. It was fatal.”

  The GOFS boss nodded towards the Cadillac. “So I assume. Did you start a war? Without inviting friends?”

  “No. Caddi wanted Mercedes back.” Harold pointed to the vehicles and the obviously injured people clearly visible inside. “He was very insistent.”

  Gofannon pursed his lips. “She was that good? I thought she wasn’t screwing Caddi?”

  “Wasn’t, isn’t, and if they poured his brains back into the skull he hasn’t got, the equipment isn’t there now. Caddi went for the rape option.” Harold gestured back towards Orchard Close. “The Hot Rods managed to get over a hundred men inside my walls. We’ve got the man who let them in, and no Hot Rods are going home, but it hurt us. We need a medic.”

  “Wish I’d got one, with what you must have to trade. You’ve brought a lot of very nice guns.” There was a hint of avarice in Gofannon’s inspection of the weaponry.

  “Caddi brought a lot but it didn’t help him. We’ll buy medical supplies at top prices, with coupons or weapons, but come in daylight and in peace.” Harold rubbed it in a little, because Gofannon might get greedy. “Remember, most of the firearms we are carrying are ours. The rest of ours and most of what Caddi’s men brought are still back there, fully loaded and the survivors are really, really angry.”

  The quick glance at Harold acknowledged the message. “Don’t worry, we’ll play very nice. Hang on, you killed all of them? How many?” Gofannon waved a hand. “Never mind, just curious. So Caddi is dead, and that’s Cooper’s motor. Did you get him as well?”

  “Yes, and the GTi isn’t Cooper’s, it’s Patty’s, though she reckons it’s only fit for rearguard.” Harold looked up the road, in the direction the vehicles were pointing. “We’ll be passing the news on to the Barbies so you might want a chat with them. About all that lovely territory that the Hot Rods will be fighting over? Or they will once they know they mislaid their boss and half their army.”

  “Oh yes! You want a piece?” The GOFS leader glanced back towards Orchard Close and swore. “When they find out? The Hot Rods don’t know?”

  “Maybe, if any got away, though we did our best to kill them all. Orchard Close don’t need much territory so we’ve already taken what we want.” True because Harold had sent a small armed party out to nearest Hot Rod estate. They’d killed both Hot Rod guards, from cover without warning. Harold had trained his fighters well. “The new Orchard Close border is now two and a half miles towards the Mansion, about halfway. That gives us a bit of a buffer. We’re marking it with bodies. The bypass access road is still neutral. Done?” He held out a hand.

  “Done.” Gofannon shook, grinned, then chuckled. “After all, none of that was mine anyway.” He stepped back and gave a flamboyant bow as he waved the convoy through, probably a signal to whoever was hanging back. Harold, Ru and the other drivers climbed back aboard, but Patty waited until the front vehicle started moving. The Demon really wasn’t taking any more chances.

  Half a mile up the road the convoy met the Barbie sentry. She nearly wet herself in fright when she first saw the Cadillac, thinking Caddi had launched a surprise raid through the back door. A few minutes later the woman spent some time screaming into the radio to reverse the alarm, or correct it, while another Barbie went off on a trail bike to confirm the real message.

  The remaining border sentries abandoned guarding to laugh or lust, especially when Patty and her girls strutted their stuff. The excitement wasn’t just the Demon, because some of the women recognised Patty’s new wheels. Some just wanted a closer look at the Winchester. By the time Patty had confirmed Caddi and Cooper were both history, while refusing numerous requests to handle her baby, Harold had started worrying about all the delays. The afternoon was passing too quickly. The line of vehicles roaring up the road from Beth�
��s, mostly empty, came as a huge relief. All three top Barbies were aboard, so at least they’d taken his request seriously.

  * * *

  Malibu, Ken and Christie would have liked to celebrate, once they knew about Caddi, but were worried about Soldier Boy bringing all this firepower to their border.

  “Not much total firepower, even if some of us are heavily armed. Twenty-six of those passengers are wounded, too badly to fight. Three of them aren’t even fighters, and the rest aren’t armed. They need a real doctor. I hoped you’d do the same as you did for Doll.” Harold tried to shrug but was too tense to make it look casual. “After all, we’ve already been inside Beth’s once.”

  “Doc is expensive. Sorry, but that’s how it is. Last time we didn’t charge, because your Lenny saved Barbie lives.” Ken actually looked and sounded genuinely sorry. “We’ll take as many as you can pay for, and let them go home once they’re fixed?” That was a big concession in itself.

  “Look in the pickup. I brought my credit card.” Ken looked the question, but Harold just waved her that way. A short period of fluent obscenity followed the big Barbie’s look over the tailgate. The vehicle held a heap of machetes, maces, knives, crossbows, armoured jackets and jeans, boots and helmets. The blades were GOFS, Liz’s or the Murphy smith’s work, top quality steel because Caddi bought the best. Ken turned, shouting to the Barbies with the empty vehicles. “Hurry up, load up those wounded heroes as fast as possible and get them to Doc.” She looked at the vehicles that had come from Beth’s, estimating numbers. “Twenty-six? We can’t take them all in one load, not if they’re badly hurt. We can’t lay anyone down in most of the cars we brought.”

  “Take some of the vehicles, either minibuses or SUVs.” Harold waved a negligent hand. “Scrub off the blood and keep them as part payment.”

  “The weapons will probably cover Doc, for all of them.” Ken beckoned to Malibu and Christie, the other two leaders. “If we take three SUVs we can carry everyone, and you’ll have credit if you need any dressings.”

  Harold took a deep breath and went for it. “Orchard Close needs a visit, from your Doc.”

  Ken sighed, waiting as both Malibu and Christie inspected the heap in the pickup. All three looked truly sorry when Malibu gave Harold the bad news. “I’m sorry, Soldier Boy. Doc doesn’t leave the Mart.”

  “Doesn’t or can’t?” Because Harold wasn’t giving up that easy.

  Malibu gave a short laugh. “It was can’t to start with, but she’s happy in there now. It’s the only place Doc feels safe. Not only that, but we daren’t give anyone the slightest chance to take her. Doc is a lifesaver, literally, so there are gangs out there who would bury any escort in bodies to get to her.” The Barbie looked back at the pickup, hesitating, but shook her head. “We can give you medicines, bandages, and a shitload of dressings and plasters, because Doc won’t cost you what’s in the truck. Most of it maybe, because your wounded look pretty bad, but you’ll have change.” She nodded when Ken told her about the three vehicles. “Lots of change.”

  “Those are the worst hit that can travel. Some of them haven’t come round since they went down, but Lenny sent a couple of phones with his best guess. There’s a dozen more badly wounded back home, all of them even worse but we daren’t move them.” Harold asked again, trying to keep the pleading out of his voice. “Just one visit from your Doc, to tell Lenny what to do. You haven’t seen everything in the pick-up. There’s firearms under the sharp stuff, shotguns and pistols, and those armoured vests are good quality. Most of them only have a couple of holes, or none at all because the Riot Squad used knives and spears. Look at them. Move the top stuff and really look. Some of my people are going to die if they don’t get a real doctor, including the woman who beat Caddi’s head into pulp.”

  “Mercedes?” Harold nodded, hopeful just for a moment. “Sorry, though I’d like her to live. Anyone who can do that deserves to live and crow about it.” Ken shook her head decisively.

  “No, sorry, Doc can’t come.”

  “I’ll join up as a Barbie, or your girlfriend?” She spoke quietly, so only two of the Riot Squad, Ru, Harold and Ken turned to Patty. She stared right back, with a bit of pink in her cheeks, gesturing towards her bandaged forearm. “I’m slightly used but still in full working order. That must be worth something?”

  “Ah shit. Now I won’t sleep at nights thinking about it.” Ken smiled sadly, shaking her head very slowly. “I don’t buy sex, but I’d take you up on the offer to join us. The trouble is, this pair still wouldn’t let Doc go. Christ, I feel like a complete bitch now.” Ken turned away, almost snarling the next words. “Bloody hell Soldier Boy, your lot go the whole nine yards, don’t they?”

  “Yeah, they’ll do what it takes to get the job done. Thank you Patty but I couldn’t let you do that, and neither would those back there.”

  “Had to offer.” Patty turned and walked back to her car.

  Harold gave up on Doc, reluctantly, handing over three phones. “The third one has a list of the serious injuries back in Orchard Close, the ones who worry Lenny the most. There’s also a shopping list. Just add anything your Doc thinks we’ve missed and any advice she can offer. You keep all the weapons except for the firearms, and the helmets and phones but not the vests. In return you send one of those cars back stuffed with medicine and dressings. I want enough to cover the injuries on the list. If you send extra you might get some firearms or armoured clothing. That’s on top of your Doc fixing my people, the ones I’ve brought. I expect them all back if they live.”

  The three Barbies moved off to talk it over, but wounded were still being carried across into Barbie vehicles. They were discussing the price, not the actual healing, a big relief for Harold. A hand-held radio came out while the three of them consulted their doctor, until a little later all three agreed on something.

  Meanwhile Harold had a word with Ru and the two guards. “What Patty said was never heard. Forget it happened. If I hear that it’s leaked I’ll be truly annoyed.”

  “If I hear about it I’ll come looking with a pair of Wamil’s knives.” Ru glared at the other two. “Especially since one of those Patty was trying to save was Wamil.”

  “Christ, I won’t talk.”

  “I wouldn’t do that.”

  Ru relaxed but tensed up again, just a little, because the Barbies were coming back.

  “Done, but we might want armoured vests or a couple of pistols or a shotgun as well once Doc has finished. We had to check to see if she had enough whatever to deal with your wounded and still send some to Orchard Close. She says there’ll be a big list of instructions for your wounded back home. Follow them and the gear will work a lot better.” Malibu shook her head as the other two chuckled. “Doc always tells us that as well, and bitter experience has proved she’s right. Can we take the pickup to save off-loading here?”

  “Yes, you can borrow it once we’ve removed the firearms. You can still have them all?” Harold had to try, just one more time.

  “Yeah, I hear you, but sorry. Get your man to take another look. If any of your people decide to take the chance on surviving the trip, send word. We’ll make sure they aren’t held up at the border, and we’ll have Doc’s squad ready for them.” Malibu looked up the road towards the GOFS, grimacing. “I’m not sure when your stuff will arrive because we’ll have to clear it with the GOFS. Even if we’re driving down your road it’s along the edge of their territory. That’ll be a very inviting target.”

  “You might bump into Gofannon selling the same sort of supplies. I doubt he’ll want to upset us by delaying you, not just now, because he’ll want all his men fighting fit. The GOFS are interested in all that territory the Hot Rods are trying to look after. The defenders are a bit short-handed right now, so if you’re quick the pair of you can be halfway to the Mansion before the Hot Rods know Caddi’s dead.” Harold lifted his lip in a snarl. “You might even collect a couple of really flash motors.”

  “How come they d
on’t know?” All three had brightened at the news, but Christie was cautious.

  “Caddi did some bragging. He reckoned he brought a hundred into Orchard Close, then about forty hit the Annex. The body count is getting close to that and still rising, including a dozen prisoners. That doesn’t include the twenty drivers we caught later. There’ll probably be a few more bodies out in the rubble. It was night, and those chasing Hot Rods didn’t bother to mark where the bastards died.” Harold smiled because he really did like the next idea. “If any made it they’re on foot. They’ll probably still be in hiding, or they could be crawling home with brown stains on their jeans.” None of the laughter sounded even slightly sympathetic.

  Ken caught the real gem in there. “A hundred and fifty at least? That’s got to be half the Hot Rod troops, maybe more than half. From those armoured vests and the weapons in the pickup, he brought his best fighters. How many did you lose?”

  “A hundred so far but about half of them weren’t fighters. Most of the civvie casualties were sitting ducks, new refugees in tents in the enclosed garden.” Harold explained briefly, very briefly because the memory of those tents would haunt him.

  Ken looked at the battered guards on Harold’s vehicles, all bearing the marks of combat. “Bloody hell. He got right inside and still got beat?” She whistled, glancing back at Patty’s motor and Caddi’s. “How many fighters have you really got?”

  “It wasn’t just fighters. Everyone who could just grabbed a weapon and went for it. Caddi tried to snatch lots of people first so his fighters were all spread out in penny packets, and we’re pretty sure he didn’t realise how many people took a gun home. Even so it was close so we’ve got a lot of wounded, some who should be in beds but won’t give up. They’re a bit twitchy so come in slow.” The Barbies nodded in understanding. They were the epitome of twitchy around here, so they understood the shoot first philosophy.

  “We will. The wounded are loaded so we’ll get them to Doc. See you soonest.” Ken went to speak quietly to Patty before leaving with the other two top Barbies. By the time the Barbies were out of sight, Harold’s depleted convoy had already started for home.