Wanted_Undead or Alive

by Kerrelyn Sparks

  It was true what he’d said earlier. Her father would never accept him. A poor guy from the Bronx. A vampire.

  Brynley could have any man she wanted. A rich rancher. An Alpha wolf. She could have wealth, land, and security. Why would she give all that up for him?

  “Thank you for coming to the rescue,” she said quietly.

  “Huh?” The pain in his rear was rapidly becoming unbearable. Maybe he should walk the rest of the way. “What rescue?”

  “You rescued me from Digger’s advances.”

  “Oh. No big deal.”

  “You’re a sweet—”

  “Don’t say it!”

  Her eyes widened. “Are you angry?”

  Yes! Digger could tell I’m in love with you, and you can’t! “It’s nothing. I . . . I need to get off this damned horse.”

  “Okay.” She pulled the horses to a stop. When he dismounted, she gave him a sympathetic look. “It’s normal to feel sore the first few times.”

  “I’m fine.” He gritted his teeth and walked stiffly beside her. “I’m just annoyed that we’re not finding anything about Corky. I don’t think she would hide out here. It’s too primitive. She’d use her vampire mind control to take over a ranch or ski lodge.”

  “You may be right,” Brynley murmured.

  “And I’m wondering about those dead cows. Digger said they were drained of blood. We should check that out.”

  “You think Corky would feed off cows?”

  “If she was desperate enough, yeah.”

  “But why mutilate them?”

  “To hide what she did. When Malcontents feed off humans, they slit the throats to conceal the teeth marks.”

  Brynley nodded slowly. “Okay. I’ll have Trudy help me bring the horses back to the cabin during the day, and then tomorrow night, we can go to the Carson ranch and ask Nate about the cows.”

  He glanced up at her. “Nate?”

  “Nathan Carson.” She smiled. “He’s an old friend. And a mortal. A really sweet guy.”

  Phineas ground his teeth. Sweet Nate was probably rich. “Did he want you, too? Like Digger?”

  “No.” She gave him an exasperated look. “Not every man who sees me wants me.”

  “Some men are fools.”

  She shook her head. “Nate is plenty smart. His brother’s a problem though. If we’re lucky we won’t run into Kyle.”

  “What’s wrong with Kyle?”

  She was silent a moment. “He did want me.”

  “Shit,” Phineas muttered. She could have her pick of a million men. Why would she ever choose him?

  Chapter Eleven

  “Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf?” Brynley sang to herself as she rolled out her sleeping bag.

  He’d run away again.

  Over an hour had passed since they’d arrived at the trailhead campsite where Trudy would meet her in the morning. After helping Brynley take care of the horses, Phineas had teleported her to her brother’s cabin so she could shower and change. He’d returned to the camp to babysit the horses, and then, thirty minutes later, he’d teleported to the cabin to bring her back here.

  He didn’t stay. He claimed he needed to shower, too, and he needed to drop by Romatech for some bottled blood and to see how his brother was faring. He also wanted to see if Angus was sending anyone back to the States to help them with their search. She suspected he didn’t want to continue the mission alone with her.

  I ain’t never seen two people so in love. Digger’s words had haunted Brynley ever since they’d left his campsite.

  The old man was crazy as a loon, so maybe she shouldn’t read too much into it. Still, she wondered how strong Phineas’s feelings were for her. He’d been quick to pretend they were married when Digger had shown interest in her. He’d held on to her and kissed her brow. Last night he’d admitted he was physically attracted to her. And tonight he’d said that he liked her.

  But love? Could he ever love her? She didn’t know.

  And she sure didn’t know how she felt about him. Yeah, she wanted to jump his bones, but that wasn’t love. That wasn’t something you based a long-term commitment on. And yet, when Phineas had claimed they were married, her heart had nearly leaped out her throat. Shock. Then a tingly spark of excitement. And then . . . an odd sense of contentment.

  Dammit, she wanted to be loved. She wanted to be cherished and treasured. For herself. Not for being a werewolf, or for being her father’s daughter.

  Her dad had been trying to marry her off for years, but she’d never felt a need to rush into anything. As a werewolf, she could live another five hundred years. Why saddle herself with a husband now?

  But if a husband truly loved her, wouldn’t it be wonderful? Why couldn’t she be as happy as Vanda? Or Toni or Caitlyn? Any day now, Caitlyn would be giving birth to twins. Why couldn’t she do that? Why couldn’t she make her own family that was based on love instead of power and manipulation?

  She stretched out on her sleeping bag in the bare cabin. She was wearing a clean pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt to sleep in, and she had a flashlight and her shotgun on the floor beside her. It was a quiet and peaceful place, and she was exhausted, but still she couldn’t sleep.

  I ain’t never seen two people so in love. Could Phineas fall in love with her? Did she want him to? What did she really know about him?

  You’re just scared, she told herself. You’ve been burned and abused too many times before. Phineas was sweet, smart, and respectful. He made her laugh. He made her horny. He made her want to jump—

  She jumped when a man’s form materialized in the dark cabin. “Phineas?”

  “You’re still awake?” He wandered over to her with a plastic bag in one hand and a Styrofoam cup in the other.

  A delicious smell wafted toward her. “You brought food?”

  “Yes.” He handed her the cup topped with a plastic lid and straw. “A chocolate shake.”

  “Oh, I love chocolate!” She took a long sip, then moaned. “That’s good. I was really getting tired of water and beef jerky.”

  He pulled a Styrofoam box out of the bag. “This is a hamburger and French fries from the Romatech cafeteria.”

  “You’re so sweet.” She grabbed the box and wondered why he suddenly looked pissed. “Is something wrong? Is your brother all right?”

  “He’s good.” Phineas dug a ketchup packet out of the bag and handed it to her. “Angus is sending some guys to help us out. Since Jason said the lady who attacked him insisted on being called his queen, it’s one of the best leads we’ve had. So as soon as it gets dark over there, Zoltan, Jack, and Lara will start teleporting our way.”

  “Who’s Zoltan?” Brynley asked as she squeezed ketchup over the French fries.

  “He’s Coven Master for Eastern Europe. He doesn’t work for Angus, but he’s always helpful when it comes to fighting Malcontents.”

  Brynley nodded and took a bite out of her hamburger.

  “Is there anything else I can bring you?” Phineas asked. “Some pillows or blankets?”

  She gave him a wry look. “In a hurry to run off again?”

  “I just want to make sure you’re comfortable. Since you’re stuck here with the horses.”

  “I’m good. More than good.” She stuffed a French fry into her mouth. “Nothing like home delivery.”

  “Well. If you don’t need anything else . . .”

  He was going to run off again, dammit. “Why don’t you stay for a while? I’m tired of being alone.” Boy, was that an understatement. She’d felt alone for twelve years, ever since her mom died and Phil ran off. “We could talk. Until I fall asleep.”

  He gave a wary look. “What do you want to talk about?”

  “Anything. Why don’t you tell me your life story?” She smirked. “That would probably put me to sleep.”

  “Very funny.”

  “Come on. Talk. I want to know more about you.” Her wolfish instincts told her she could trust him, but the human part of
her wanted to make sure.

  He eased slowly into a sitting position beside her. Even though he kept his face blank, it was obvious he was sore.

  “You’ll feel better after your death-sleep, right?”

  “I’m okay.” He scooted back to lean against the wall.

  “So?” She turned toward him, sitting cross-legged. “Tell me about yourself.”

  “There’s not much to tell.”

  “I doubt that. You don’t get a warrant for your arrest doing nothing.”

  He winced. “I’ve done a few things I’m not proud of.”

  “Haven’t we all?” She ate a few fries, and when he remained quiet, she prompted him. “You were born in the Bronx?”

  “Yes. I grew up in my grandmother’s house with her, my great-aunt, and my mom.”

  “No dad?”

  “He went to jail when I was a baby. Armed robbery.”

  “Oh wow. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. I had a great childhood.” He smiled with a faraway look in his eyes. “I had my gran, my aunt Ruth, and my mom, all taking care of me, making sure I always felt loved and cared for.”

  “That sounds wonderful.” She ate another fry. “Three women spoiling you rotten. No wonder you became a ladies’ man.”

  “I did learn how to sweet-talk them.” His smile faded. “It didn’t last. Gran passed away when I was eight, and soon after that, my dad got out of prison.”

  “Oh.” She had a bad feeling his dad was as domineering as her own father.

  “He moved in with us, and about a year later, my mom had a baby. My little brother. She wanted to name him Lamont, but my dad wanted to name him Freedom to commemorate his getting out of jail. They ended up naming him Freemont.”

  “And he’s working at Romatech now?” Brynley took another bite of hamburger.

  “Yeah. He’s nineteen years old now. Going to college. He’s real smart.”

  She smiled at the obvious pride in Phineas’s voice when he talked about his brother.

  “Two years after Freemont, my little sister, Felicia, was born. I was about eleven then, and I started to notice things. Like my mom would walk with a limp sometimes, or her arms would be bruised.”

  Brynley winced. “Your dad was abusing her?”

  Phineas nodded. “I could hear him yelling at her late at night, but I kept telling myself that was all he was doing. I couldn’t admit what was really happening.”

  “You were just a kid,” Brynley murmured. “Denial can be the safest way to go.” She knew that all too well.

  “One morning when I was twelve, my mom had a black eye, and my aunt Ruth started fussing at my dad, and he threatened to shut her up for good. That’s when it finally hit me. Something snapped in me that day, and I told him if he ever hurt my mother or Aunt Ruth again, I’d kill him.”

  “Oh my gosh, Phineas.” She set the box of food down and moved closer to him. “What happened?”

  “He beat the crap out of me.”

  She gasped and touched his shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It changed my life. I’d been a little kid before that with no purpose or direction. I was a lousy student and a lazy athlete, but that day, I woke up. I realized I needed to man up. I started working hard in school, so I could get a good job to support the family. And I started going to a gym every afternoon to learn how to box.”

  Man up? Brynley’s heart ached for the twelve-year-old boy who’d tried to become a man overnight so he could provide for his family and protect them.

  “By the time I was fourteen, I was a pretty good boxer. I won a few local bouts. And I was as tall as my dad, so he started being more careful.”

  “That’s good.”

  He shook his head. “It didn’t last. He came home drunk one night and started in on my mom. That time, I beat the crap out of him.”

  “Wow,” Brynley breathed. He’d stood up to his dad. Something she’d never had the nerve to do with her own dad.

  “Then I told him to leave and never come back.”

  “Did he?”

  “Yeah.” Phineas shrugged. “Turned out he had another woman on the side, so he just moved in with her.”

  “What a pig.”

  “He got what he deserved. His girlfriend had cheated on him and passed the AIDS virus to him.” Phineas sighed. “He’d passed it on to my mom.”

  “Oh no.”

  Phineas was silent for a moment with his eyes closed. When he opened his eyes, they glinted with unshed tears. “She died of AIDS when I was nineteen.”

  “Oh, Phineas.” Brynley leaned her head against his shoulder and rested a hand against his chest. “I’m so sorry. I know how it feels.”

  “Do you?” He placed his hand on top of hers.

  “Yes.” Tears filled her eyes. “I lost my mom when I was eighteen.”

  “Really?” He squeezed her hand. “I thought werewolves could live for centuries.”

  “Not with lung cancer.” Or a broken spirit. She’d always suspected her mother hadn’t fought to survive.

  “I’m sorry.” He laced his fingers with hers.

  “Do you still have your aunt?” she asked.

  “Yes.” He leaned his head back against the wall. “She worked hard to support us. And I won some money in boxing matches, so we managed all right. But toward the end when Mom was really sick, we ran up some bad medical bills. And then there was the cost of the funeral.” He grimaced. “I did something really stupid.”

  “What?”

  “I agreed to throw a fight for a lot of money. I thought it would solve all our problems. It did pay everything off, but . . .”

  “It screwed up your career?”

  He nodded.

  “Oh, Phineas.” Tears crowded her eyes once again. He’d destroyed his boxing career in order to bury his mother.

  “I couldn’t get a decent fight after that. Or when I did, they expected me to throw it, and I refused. They didn’t want me around anymore.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “I tried getting a regular job, but it wasn’t enough to support everyone, especially when Aunt Ruth had to retire. She has diabetes really bad. I felt responsible for my younger brother and sister. I was the one who’d chased off their father. So I . . . I made another stupid mistake.”

  “That’s when you sold drugs?”

  “Please don’t ever tell my family. It would kill them. It . . . well, it did kill me. The Malcontents attacked and transformed me so they would have a drug connection.” He heaved a long sigh. “So now you know what a screwed-up, miserable excuse for a mortal I was. And why I didn’t want to tell you. You’ll probably hate me now.”

  She blinked away the tears in her eyes. She could never hate him. “Why did you tell me, then?”

  “Remember how I said I like you just the way you are? I guess . . . I want you to like me the way I am. And so—”

  “You told me everything,” she finished his sentence. She’d been right. He was a survivor. Like her. He’d lost his mother like her. He’d tried to take care of his younger siblings like she had. All this time she’d thought they had nothing in common, when in truth they were very much alike. Their wounded souls were reaching out to each other.

  And she was falling for him. A tear rolled down her cheek. God, no. She didn’t want to feel this strongly for him. Not when there was no future for them.

  “I know you hate vampires, Brynley, but it’s really the best thing that ever happened to me. It gave me a second chance. I have a good job now, and I provide for my family. And I’m doing something important, helping to keep the world safe from Malcontents.”

  She wiped her cheek. “You’re able to be a hero now?”

  “I try to be. Angus and the other guys have given me some good examples to follow. I want to be . . . honorable like them.”

  “Phineas.” She touched his cheek. “How can you be so dense?”

  He blinked. “What?”

  “You were always honora
ble.”

  He scoffed. “I was a damned drug dealer.”

  “You were a young man, desperate to take care of his family. You threw away a promising career to get the money to bury your mother. You were brave and selfless.” Another tear fell down her cheek. “You were always a hero.”

  He regarded her with a stunned look. “You don’t think badly of me then?”

  “I think you’re wonderful.” Desire swelled up inside her. She wanted him so bad. But she didn’t want to love him. It would hurt something awful if she lost him. And she would definitely lose him if her father and his minions found out about him.

  Then don’t love him, her inner wolf whispered. Just screw him.

  She drew in a sharp breath, and her inner wolf latched on to Phineas’s scent. Animal lust flooded her, overwhelming her womanly desire. Take him. You know you want him.

  Her heart raced. She couldn’t do this. She was just distraught, and that always made her wolf aggressive. Give in to me. Trust the wolf. The wolf knows best.

  Moisture seeped between her legs, and she stifled a groan. It would kill her if she got close to Phineas, only to lose him. Don’t think about the future. Take him now!

  Phineas stiffened when she suddenly straddled his lap. “Brynley? What are you doing?”

  Her hands trembled as they skimmed over his shoulders. “I have a sudden, insatiable hunger—”

  “I brought you a hamburger—” He inhaled sharply when she popped the snaps open on his shirt. “What—”

  “Oh my gosh.” She smoothed her hands under his shirt. “You were right. Your chest is pure, hard muscle.”

  He gave her a dubious look. “What happened to last night’s ‘you’re so easy to resist’ strategy?”

  “Why fight it? You want me. I want you.” She brushed her hand over his jaw, and the prickle of his whiskers made her all fluttery inside. Just like his voice did. “Say it for me.”

  “Say what?”

  “You know. The line you say in the commercial. ‘Hello, ladies.’ I love it when you say that.”

  He frowned. “I don’t know why women like that.”

  “Don’t you know how sexy your voice is?” She skimmed her hand down his neck to his chest. “You’re sexy all over.” She leaned closer, pressing her hands against his chest. “Say it. Say the words.”