Here Skies Surround Us

by Melanie Mcfarlane

  “Crimes are not tolerated,” Caroline yells, bringing the whip down hard on Mack’s back. The end of the whip slices through the air with a loud crack, followed by an ear-wrenching scream from Mack as it cuts through his white shirt and leaves a trail of red where the skin has broken.

  I withdraw into the crowd, my skin crawling with disgust. My stomach churns at the next whip crack, and I try to hold in whatever remnants are in my stomach from breakfast.

  The crowd cheers, and then continues chanting, “Make them pay!”

  Every word they shout hammers at my skull. I glance back up at Caroline, my head pounding, and her eyes manage to catch mine. She smiles wildly at me, her eyes narrowed, and I drop my notebook. I tear away from her gaze and bend over to retrieve it, jumping as another crack slices through the air, followed by another scream. The crowd cheers again. I need to get out of here.

  Keeping my head down, I weave through the crowd until I’m running toward the dome. Before I reach it, I slip between two houses and hurl up my breakfast. Sweat breaks out over my skin.

  “Not yer cup of tea?” Ray’s voice follows me into the alley. I straighten myself up quickly, recalling our last awkward meeting.

  “No, not really.”

  “I saw you running from the square,” Ray says sympathetically. “There’s no room here for crime. Director Carmichael runs a tight ship for that.”

  “She’s not the Director,” I say. “Your dome abandoned those labels when you moved outside.

  “A Director is still a Director without the official title.” Ray smiles a toothless grin. “You tell me what the difference is. Director? Tyrant? Dictator?” He leans over and I can smell the moonshine on his sour breath.

  “I see your point,” I say, moving past Ray back out into the street.

  “And I see you, Brown Eyes,” Ray yells after me. “I see you watching us and I’m watching you. Don’t let them change you! You’re different.”

  I run the rest of the way to the Axis, forcing myself not to look back and not to think about those screams. I ignore the girl at the desk, holding my badge out to her as I run past. She’s new. What happened to the skittish girl? Did she finally get a day off, or did they move her to some new torturous job? When the elevator doors finally open, I burst into the lab, breathless.

  “Whoa there,” Minton says, smiling, “you look like you saw a ghost or something.”

  “She would believe in something as puerile as the afterlife,” Cabri grumbles. I shoot him a dirty look and he shrugs, and then goes back to his work.

  “I ran here,” I say, half-explaining. “I’m just out of breath.”

  “Well, come over here and catch your breath,” Minton says excitedly. “I think I have a working prototype of the water-filtration system ready to test.”

  I walk over and prop myself against the table. “How did you get it done?”

  “Oh, it’s not done,” Minton says, turning on a tap and running a paper strip under it before hooking up a tube. “This is just to test the water quality. Once that is confirmed then we need to check the filter for the serum enhancer.”

  Minton flips on the system. It doesn’t make a sound, and for a minute I think nothing’s working, until a small trickle of water comes out the tap on the other end. She runs another paper strip through that side and then lays both down on the table. I look at her quizzically and she smiles.

  “Just watch,” she says, pointing at the papers.

  I lean onto the table with my elbows and watch as the papers change colors before my eyes. The two strips are similar hues but different shades. “What does this mean?” I ask.

  “It means it works!” Minton squeals. Cabri looks over at us with disapproval, but she ignores him.

  “Now what?”

  “My assistant takes it for reproduction,” she says. “Then I start testing the last filter. Here she is.”

  “Your assistant?” I ask surprised, turning toward the door. Remy’s friend Shell walks in.

  “Sorry I’m late,” she says. “I was at the square for the sentencing.”

  “Oh right,” Minton says, glancing awkwardly at me. “I forgot about that.” She turns around and boxes up the filtration system.

  “I didn’t know you worked here too,” I say, turning to Shell.

  “A girl has got to pay her bills,” Shell says, grabbing the box from Minton. “I’m not taken care of like Remy, Jess, Nico, and Evan. I have to earn my own way.” She starts walking out of the lab and I follow.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well, Jess has her other half to support her,” Shell explains, stepping into the elevator. “Remy is looked after by Evan’s family because he’s like a nanny for Quinn. And Evan and Nico have their families to support them.”

  “Poor Quinn,” I say. “It seems he’s passed around a lot.”

  “Between you and me,” Shell whispers as the doors begin to slide shut, “I think Caroline would be happy if he just disappeared.”

  “Wait!” I call out, as the elevator doors close. Disappear? That’s harsh, even for Caroline.

  I go back into the lab. Minton has offered Cabri a hand with some cataloging, so she’ll know exactly which variations of the immune serum will be tested in her filtration system. Truthfully, I think she has a little crush on him, but he’s so full of himself he’ll never see it. Ah, poor Minton.

  “With any luck, we can start testing tomorrow.” Minton looks up at me excitedly.

  “Who’s going to be that daring soul?”

  A scratchy voice interrupts on the intercom before I get an answer. “Please send Miss Greyes to Mrs. Carmichael’s office.”

  I slowly walk to the elevator. Inside, I look up and remember the first time I rode in one with Evan. He warned me about the cameras. He must have known from experience. Did Caroline hear Shell and me talking about her? A shudder runs down my spine.

  Caroline is working at her desk. I stop in the doorway, preparing myself for an onslaught of questioning and unfaltering stare-down. I knit my fingers together to stop my hands from shaking as I remember the vicious look in her eyes as she whipped Jeb, Karl, and Mack this morning. What will she do to me?

  “Excuse me,” I interrupt her. Even my voice is shaking.

  “Ah.” Caroline looks up at me, a thin smile on her lips. “Come in, Natalia. Please shut the door behind you and have a seat.”

  I manage to complete her request without falling all over myself. I sit on my hands so as not to reveal my discomfort, but I can still feel them vibrating beneath me.

  “I’ve heard some things about you in your short time here,” Caroline says. She comes around to the front of her desk and leans against it, facing my chair.

  “I can explain—” I begin. Caroline holds her hand up.

  “I have to say, at first I wasn’t sure you’d be able to accustom yourself to our ways. I mean, there was your outward defiance at us testing you for the virus to make sure you weren’t infected. Then there was the placement in Laundry. I apologize for that, but I had to be sure you were a worker, not just some Delegate.”

  “I was never a Delegate,” I say, my hands squirming under my legs.

  “Yes, but you fraternized with them, did you not?” Caroline says, bringing up a finger to her mouth. She taps it against her lips before continuing. “There was also the incident with the baker and the boy, but Alec advised me that was from your lack of knowledge of our rules and Evan assures me you have learned those now. I will take partial blame for that, as well. I should have made sure you knew those before letting you be left alone.

  “Then there’s what you did in the lab yesterday,” she adds.

  “I’m sorry,” I say quickly.

  “Why? Minton advises me that you were highly beneficial in explaining to her how your plumbing systems work back home. So helpful, I am pleased enough to send extras of our filtration systems back home to your dome as an act of good faith.”<
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  “You will?” I ask, surprised. “That’s kind of you, but my dome is immunized already.”

  “We’re adding a little kick to it,” Caroline says. “In case other domes have samples like yours did. We want it to be extra effective.”

  “They’ll be grateful,” I say. Maybe it will be enough to appease Jak. “Evan and I can take them back with us in a couple weeks.”

  “Evan?” Caroline asks, her voice slightly faltering. “No, Evan is needed here. Now, more than ever. Of course, if you’d like to take them yourself to your friends back home, you’re more than welcome to leave when they’re ready.”

  I stare at Caroline wide-eyed. “Evan hasn’t told you?”

  She pauses, looking up at me with one eyebrow raised. “Apparently, when it comes to you, Evan likes to leave me out of his decisions,” Caroline says through gritted teeth, staring down at me. I sink into my chair. Her hand twitches where it rests on her desk, no doubt wishing she had something to whip me with right now.

  “We haven’t had much time to talk about things since we got here,” I say quietly. “But the intention was always to go back together. I thought he told you that.”

  Caroline’s fingers grip the edge of the desk behind her. “Evan needs to think about his future with Nico. They’ve been promised to each other since birth. You and I both know this thing you have together is just a phase.”

  “Evan told me that Nico has … moved on.”

  “They can’t be blamed for wanting to experiment before settling down together,” Caroline says. I let out a tiny breath and blink back my tears.

  “Evan’s a big boy,” I say, feeling a heat surge up from within my chest. I cross my arms before proceeding. “I think he can make his own decisions.”

  Caroline laughs and turns to go back to her chair. “I will never let Evan be with you,” she says. “He may think he can do what he wishes, but ultimately, you’re an outsider. Here, outsiders are never fully trusted.”

  How funny. Not long ago my dome was saying the same thing about Evan.

  My hands are hot and throbbing from being constricted. “Maybe that’s why we don’t plan to stay here.”

  “Listen, little girl,” Caroline says, standing above me. “I make the rules around here. If you think you’re going to step in and sway my son, you’re mistaken. Now, feel free to leave. We’re done here.”

  “I don’t need to sway Evan,” I say, jumping out of my chair. The quick movement shocks Caroline and she steps back, bumping against her chair. “As I said, he’s a big boy.”

  I turn on my heel, feeling my entire body vibrate as I walk to the elevator. I hit the button numerous times. Why is it taking so long!

  “Oh, Natalia?” Caroline calls out from the doorway of her office. The elevator opens, and I jump inside before turning to face her. “Did you enjoy the show this morning? Don’t forget, I don’t approve of rules being broken. Especially the ones I make.”

  Her face disappears as the elevator doors close, taking me to the main floor so I can get as far away from Caroline as possible.

  When I get out of the elevator, I run. I don’t know where I’m going—I don’t have a plan. I simply run out of the lobby, out of the Axis, out of the dome, and through the Outer Colony.

  When I reach the perimeter, two members of the New Order greet me. Well, less greet than yell.

  “Hey!” they call out to me as I approach. I slow down my run into a light jog.

  “Are you trying to leave without a pass?” a hard-looking woman asks me.

  “I wasn’t aware I needed a pass,” I say, coming to a stop about ten feet away.

  “Everyone needs a pass,” the man says, coming up beside her.

  “So, you’re telling me I’m not allowed to leave?” I throw my hands up in the air. “I’m not even from here.”

  Something catches my eye, outside the perimeter, far off in the distance. The trees there are thin, but too far to see clearly. Then I see it again, and I’m positive it’s not just a figment of my imagination.

  Someone is hiding out there, watching us.

  “Hey, aren’t you the one—”

  “Thanks anyway,” I say, turning and running in the opposite direction. The last thing I need is for them to recognize me as the girl who got three of their friends whipped in public. Or maybe they know I’m Evan’s girlfriend. Either way I suddenly don’t feel safe.

  I have no idea where I’m going so I just keep running. I think back to the times in my life I blindly ran away. When I was nine, I ran to the Outer Forest after finding out my parents were killed. When I was hauled off from the Axis, after Evan was taken to B3, I ran back to save him, unsure of what I was going to do. I sense a pattern in my life: when I feel completely out of control, I run.

  When I reach exhaustion, I slow down. I’m in the north quarter and up ahead I see the hostel. Only a little farther, legs. I push on.

  When I stumble inside Remy spots me. “Hey, Nat! What’s wrong?”

  I see my reflection in a rusty old mirror by the entrance. Disheveled hair and eyes red with unshed tears. Sweat drips from my brow. I have no idea how long I’ve been running. “Remy,” I say, before collapsing to my knees.

  “Jess,” Remy calls out, “get Nat some water.” He turns back toward me. I can’t find the strength in my knees to stand any longer, so he helps me up. “Nat, what happened? I need to know, are you okay?”

  “No,” I say, and then break into tears. “No, I don’t think I am. I haven’t slept. I haven’t seen Evan. I just got into a fight with Caroline.”

  “Hey,” Remy says, “it’s okay. You can rest on my bed. Take a nap. You’ll feel better when you wake up. And trust me, we’ve all fought with Caroline at one point or another.”

  Remy helps me to his room and leaves me to rest. I stretch out on the mattress and curl up in an old quilt, my mind jumping from thought to thought. Everything is falling apart; this isn’t how it was supposed to be. I was supposed to come here and Caroline was going to like me, and Evan and I were going to be together. Now Evan’s gone, Caroline is in control, and people are hiding outside the colony.

  I pull the quilt up to my face to cover my tears. It shouldn’t be this hard. Maybe it’s time I backed off and left Evan to the life planned for him before he met me. Before this dome is attacked by another, because God knows they’ve done their share of damage.

  I roll over in the quilt and disappear into my dreams. I’m running in them. Running away, lost in the forest, searching for my parents. Everywhere I look, I see the infected. Their faces are swollen, their eyes are faint, and their skin is peeling away, as if it’s allergic to bones. The dismembered figures reach out to me and I realize they’ve been looking for me. I look closer and I see they’re my parents. They want me. They miss me. I reach out to them and they grab my shoulders, pulling me tightly toward them.

  “Nat,” Remy’s voice calls out. “Wake up, Nat. You’re having a nightmare.” I open my eyes and see him shaking me by the shoulders.

  “Oh, sorry,” I say. “Was it bad?”

  “You tell me.” Remy sits on the edge of the bed. “You were screaming, and the kids were getting scared. Are you going to be okay?”

  I lift my hands and run them through my hair. For a moment, I forgot about today. “I don’t know. Really. I just don’t know.”

  “Promise you won’t go do anything crazy,” he says, lying back on the bed with his arms behind his head.

  “I learned my lesson,” I say, shivering at the memory of the lashings that morning.

  “Good,” he says. “You know, you should talk to Evan about his mother. Trust me, he’d understand.”

  “I don’t know what to do about Evan,” I say. “On one hand, I want to beg him to leave with me. On the other, I don’t know that I have a right to ask that of him. This is where he’s from. Caroline made it clear that he’s meant to stay.”

  “Don’t listen to her,�
� Remy says. “She doesn’t have a right to demand things of him.”

  “But she’s his mother.”

  “In name, maybe,” Remy says. “After Evan’s dad, Jase, died, he raised himself. Caroline went AWOL for a while and she never returned the same.”

  “She abandoned Evan?”

  “Not physically,” Remy explains, “but she may as well have. She just sat around mute for months, until Quinn was born. Then she handed that baby off to Evan and buried herself in her work. He was only a teenager. A baby wasn’t his responsibility.”

  “I don’t know if I’m right for Evan,” I say. “I’m not strong and beautiful like Nico. I’m not prim and proper like Caroline. I just get into trouble and worry him most of the time. I think I need to leave without Evan and go back home.”

  “Nat,” Evan says from Remy’s bedroom door, “what are you talking about?”

  “Evan!” I say, sitting up in surprise. Remy gets off the bed.

  “What’s going on in here?” Evan asks.

  “It’s not what it looks like, buddy,” Remy says, stepping toward Evan.

  “Really? Because I get back from two days scouting and can’t find my girlfriend anywhere. I’m worried sick that something has happened to her, and here I find her in bed with my best friend, talking about leaving me.”

  “No, Evan,” I say, standing up. “We were just talking. I came here because I had nowhere else to go.”

  “To my friend’s bed?” he asks, scrunching his eyebrows until the lines in his forehead are all I can look at.

  “Well, yes,” I say. “Remy let me sleep here and I just woke up. He came in to check on me.” My palms are sweating, and I rub them on my pant legs as I clear my throat. Evan’s starting to remind me of his mother.

  “I don’t want to think about what might have happened if I didn’t show up when I did,” Evan says dejectedly. Remy reaches a hand out to his shoulder. “Don’t touch me.” Evan jerks back, pushing Remy away.

  “I’m going to leave you two alone,” Remy says, walking out of the bedroom. “I think you have some things to talk about.

  “Well?” Evan asks. “You can share things with Remy but not me?”