To Catch a Groom

by Rebecca Winters

  “You watch too many American movies, Greer.”

  “No—that was our mother,” she snapped.

  “We’d still like to see your ID,” Piper insisted.

  Without hesitation the men pulled out their wallets and passed them around. Greer was still staring the shark down when Olivia handed her the first one.

  Nicolas de Pastrana, Marbella, Spain: six-three. Brown hair, brown eyes. Age thirty-four. Gorgeous photo.

  The next one came around. Lucien de Falcon, Monacoville, Monaco. Whoa: six-two. Black hair, gray eyes. Age thirty-three. Another gorgeous photo.

  Greer’s hand trembled when Olivia handed her the third wallet. Maximilliano di Varona, Colorno, Italy. Maximilliano— Hah! He’s six-three. Black hair, black eyes. Age thirty-four. No photo of him could be as breathtaking as the real thing.

  The way European names were put together could be misleading. All of the men had a “de” or a “di” following their first names, which could mean nothing more than the fact that they were the son of so and so. Or it could be a sign they were part of an important family. Take your pick.

  No doubt these exceptional male hunks had handpicked their fake names for a reason. One she and her sisters would never know about. She lifted her head and handed him back his wallet.

  “I still don’t believe a single word you say.”

  He chewed on his lower lip. “Would it help if I told you I’m chief counsel for the House of Parma-Bourbon?”

  “You mean you’re the one who had a long talk with my father’s attorney? The one who affected our release from the prison?” Greer let out an angry laugh. “And would it help if I told you Piper is really the Duchess of Guasfalla, Olivia is really the Duchess of Piacenza, and I’m really the Duchess of Parma?”

  “Come on, Greer,” he said in a thick toned voice. “Let us put the jokes aside.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  “YOU know who I am.”

  She blinked her eyes with great exaggeration. “I do?”

  “You as much as admitted it in your jail cell.”

  “I did?”

  “You did, mademoiselle,” Luc asserted. “Max told me and Nic all about the Husband Fund, so there’s no use denying it.”

  Nic nodded. “The calendars are the proof, señorita. To be more specific, the scene in the pastry shop in Parma?”

  “You mean where Violetta didn’t give Luigio any of her chocolate biscotti? What does that have to do with anything?”

  “They weren’t the only two characters in that picture,” the first mate inserted. “There was a third character recognizable due to the ducal corona emblem.”

  “Oh that— He was just the local pompous peacock strutting about town in his fancy duds trying to impress everyone with his family title. You know…the symbolic, typical, flamboyant Italian male, all puffed up with self-importance.

  “If you took careful notice, Violetta was only toying with him to make Luigio jealous. She really adores Luigio who suffers from a private tragedy he keeps to himself. She’s determined to find out what it is. Deep inside she really admires his humility. But we’ve gotten off the subject again.”

  “That’s another touching story, Greer,” Max said, sounding oddly violent. “I’m surprised you’re not a writer.”

  He moved closer to her, invading that circle of space she needed to think clearly. “But you’re right. We’ve strayed from the main line of questioning. Are you going to tell me you didn’t admit to using the Husband Fund to go spouse hunting?”

  “I admit it, but I still don’t have a clue who you are.”

  “You mean you just picked me out of a group of candidates?”

  “I might have done if you’d been lined up on the stage at a bachelor auction. For a guy who’s been over the hill for thirteen years, you’re still not half bad.”

  His hands were no longer clasped in front of him. They’d formed fists at his side. “Over the hill?”

  “Yeah. After twenty-one all men go downhill, but as I said, you’re still pretty well preserved even if you have some gray hairs at the temple. However getting back to the point I was trying to make before you interrupted me, I thought I saw a shark in the pool of the Splendido.

  “No one could have been more surprised when I discovered it had legs and had started walking toward moi. If you recall, I waited until I was asked before joining you for a swim.”

  His features took on a chiseled cast. “So what you’re saying is, you were so desperate to find a husband, you were willing to go after the first male who approached you, not knowing one thing about him? Not his name? Not his background?”

  “Wow!” Her eyebrows lifted. “You sound just like Daddy. I wouldn’t be surprised if you faked your age along with your name on your driver’s license. Are you sure you don’t have a daughter tucked away somewhere? You know—do as I say, not as I do?”

  There was an uncomfortable moment of quiet before he said, “Positive.”

  Puzzled by his brief, quiet answer she said the next thing that came into her head. “I knew you were a good swimmer. Does that help”

  “That’s important to Greer,” Piper interjected. “That’s how Don got her to go out with him in the first place.”

  “Larry had a phobic reaction to water. That’s why he could never get to first base with her,” Olivia explained.

  “Guys— Signore Maximilliano doesn’t want to hear about my love life any more than I want to hear about his.”

  “Then you admit that a man over the hill can still have one,” he insinuated. It was a borderline sneer.

  “Of course. And you’ve already told me about yours. It’s the one thing to come out of your mouth I believe with all my heart.”

  His lips suddenly twitched. “When did I tell you about it?”

  “You said, and I quote, ‘If there’s one thing I know about women, they don’t feel dressed without their purse.’ You certainly couldn’t have made a statement like that unless you’d had prior knowledge.

  “But if we could possibly tear ourselves from the riveting subject of your frantic love life, I’d like to know how you thought up such an amazing name for yourself. Obviously it was coined from the bloody days of the Circus Maximus.

  “But it truly is fantastic. I mean, if there is an honest to goodness Maximilliano who’s a duc or something equally pretentious running around Parma, does everyone really have to call him by his whole name?”

  To her surprise, all three men exploded with laughter. The full-bodied kind that brought tears to their eyes.

  “Very well, Greer,” he said as soon as quiet reigned once more. “It’s clear we’ve reached a stalemate, a term you as an American will recognize from your own courts of law. In the case of Duchess v Varano, trust is lacking on both sides of the Atlantic.”

  “That was brilliant, signore. I couldn’t have said it better myself.”

  He gave an almost imperceptible aristocratic bow that to her surprise seemed instinctive. “Knowing and accepting that fact, I’d like to offer a plea bargain.”

  “Plea away, signore.”

  The corner of his compelling male mouth lifted. “We really are trying to catch a jewel thief.”

  She squinted up at him. “I can believe that. A collection of jewels falling into your hands might not make you as rich as the Count of Monte Cristo with Nic and Luc here impersonating the Count of Cabalconti and company. But you’d at least have enough to cover taxes on all the money you make under the table so to speak.”

  His smile broadened. “Good. We’re making progress.”

  “Are we. How nice.”

  “Come to Monaco with us on the Piccione,” he urged, his eyes focused on her mouth. “A handful of people we’ve considered prime suspects will be there for the Grand Prix. With your help we might be able to flush them out.”

  “We need your help,” the captain spoke up.

  “No way, Jose,” Piper responded. “The next thing we know we’ll end up at the mercy of so
me potentate from outer Mongolia! Greer’s right. You’d sell us to the highest bidder for profit.”

  “Then I have another suggestion,” Luc interjected. His gaze had traveled to Olivia. “Since you are such an excellent driver, you take your sisters to Monaco in the Fiat.

  “We’ll sail the Piccione to the Port d’Hercules and join you at my apartment. That way you won’t have to fear we’ve pirated you away to some distant shore, never to be seen or heard of again. I have to admit that would be a great tragedie.”

  One look at Olivia’s eyes and Greer could tell her sister was tempted. She’d dreamed of seeing the Grand Prix for years.

  “It’s a good plan, signorine.” The so-called Max had spoken again. “Give us tonight and tomorrow. Then we’ll put you on the plane home from Nice.”

  “What exactly do we have to do?” Greer demanded.

  “Just be the people you were when you came to the Riviera. We’ll introduce you as the Duchesses of Kingston. There is no such English title anymore, but most people wouldn’t know that, so don’t change one iota of your story.” His eyes flamed like black fires, reminding her of the first time she’d seen him at the pool. “Wear one of those filmy, floaty concoctions I hung up in your closet.”

  Her legs almost buckled from the sensuality in his tone and look. “And the Duchesse pendants of course,” she added.

  “Of course.”

  “And when we’re not being used for bait, what other plans do you have for us?”

  His elegant shrug fascinated her. “Whatever your heart desires. A private dinner and dancing on a palace patio dripping with bougainvillea, followed by a swim in a secluded lagoon.”

  Goose bumps broke out on Greer’s skin. As for Olivia, her eyes were glowing a hot blue.

  “Instead of swimming, I’d rather go on to a club where some of the Formula I drivers are partying and get their autographs.”

  “That could be arranged Mademoiselle Olivier.”

  “What about you, señorita?” Nic asked Piper.

  “I’d rather go to bed early, then get up at dawn and walk around making sketches of everything for a new line of calendars I have in mind.”

  “I’ll prepare a picnic for us. While you draw, I’ll feed you.”

  “Just no olives, Spanish or otherwise.”

  He threw his head back and laughed. “I promise. Only chocolate truffles and pastries. I happen to be a chocoholic myself.”

  For once Greer’s sisters wouldn’t look at her.

  They were caving. But who could blame them? Whoever these men really were, Greer and her sisters had no business being around them.

  “Where exactly is this supposed apartment of yours, Monsieur Luc?”

  He flashed Greer a silvery glance. “I will draw you and your sisters a map.” For a man needing a cane, he got around with amazing speed and returned from the cockpit with paper and pencil in hand.

  Greer could just imagine where his diabolical map would lead. Probably straight to the island castle where poor Edmond Dantes had been imprisoned.

  “Don’t worry, Greer,” the dark stranger interjected. “You won’t have to drive as far as Marseilles. In any case, the Château D’If is now a museum.”

  Flame scorched her cheeks. He was doing it again. Reading her mind.

  Luc handed Olivia the paper.

  Greer smirked at Max. “X marks the spot.”

  His heart-stopping smile was in evidence once more. “You may even find your ultimate treasure there.”

  Her eyelids narrowed. “It’s always about the treasure, isn’t it, signore.” She wheeled around. “Come on, guys. Let’s go.”

  She picked up her suitcase and started walking toward the parking area. By the time she’d reached the car, her sisters had caught up to her. Olivia opened the trunk and they stashed their bags.

  “Are you mad at us?” Piper asked after they’d driven off.

  “No.”

  “Yes, you are,” Olivia gainsayed her.

  “Maybe a little. But after you caught me kissing Maximus the Great in the stateroom, I have no right to point a finger.”

  “Even if they are a bunch of liars, we weren’t exactly telling the truth ourselves when we pretended to be real duchesses. It won’t hurt us to try to find Luc’s house and enjoy ourselves a little before we go home.”

  “Come on, Olivia,” Greer complained. “Do you honestly think they’re going to let us near an airport before the nine days are over? Because if you do, I have a pendant in my jewelry box worth a million dollars I could sell for double that depending on the right buyer.”

  “Greer! What’s happened to you?” Piper cried.

  “Not a thing.”

  Olivia gave an emphatic nod of her blond head. “Yes, it has. You’re different. You’ve been different since the night you jumped into the Splendido pool with the splendid Maximilliano. Let’s face it. You finally met a man who caused you to lose your inhibitions,” she reasoned.

  “Now you’re angry because he’s the one man on earth you don’t know if you can trust. Worse, after we go home, you know no other man is ever going to make you feel the same way again.”

  Her sisters stared at her in that pitying way she couldn’t abide.

  “I’m not feeling that bad!”

  “Yes, you are.”

  “For someone who gets your directions confused when you drive, it was very clever of you to notice we were sailing in the wrong direction yesterday.”

  “We know how much you’d love to visit Elba and Monte Cristo.”

  “Your sacrifice was heroic.”

  Greer took a steadying breath. “So was yours. I know how much you were looking forward to telling Fred and Tom you skied on the Italian and Spanish Riviera.”

  “So we’ll water ski some more with the guys when we get back home.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Yeah.”

  “It’ll be fun.”

  “Sure it will. The Hudson Riviera.”

  “At least it’s safe.”

  “Yeah.”

  “The guys never pull any surprises. They just ski.”

  “Yup.”

  “They don’t try to be something they’re not.”

  “Nope.”

  “They wouldn’t know how.”

  “Nope.”

  “They speak one language.”

  “Football.”

  “Yup.”

  “I bet Tom doesn’t know Pope Gregory was Greek.”

  “He isn’t Catholic.”

  “Nope.”

  “Fred hates Italian food. He says olive oil makes him sick.”

  “Yup.”

  “I bet Don’s never heard of Spanish olive oil.”

  “Nope.”

  “It’s for sure he doesn’t have a clue Venus rose from the sea. He thinks it’s a planet.”

  “Yup.”

  “They’re sweet.”

  “Yup.”

  “They’re boring.”

  “Yup.”

  “They’re looking for a wife.”

  “And the crew of Piccione are looking for a one-night stand,” Greer reminded them. “I for one don’t plan to give in when I don’t know one thing about Maximilliano, even if that is his real name, which it probably isn’t.”

  “But you know the chemistry’s there,” Olivia stated. “That’s something neither of you can fake.”

  “So now I’m supposed to let desire take over?”

  “Not completely. Just enough to wangle a marriage proposal out of him. That was the whole purpose of the Husband Fund. If you hang in there, then you won’t have to pay back the $5,000 after we get home.”

  “Is that what you’re going to do with Luc?”

  “I’m thinking about it. I could always grab his cane and beat him over the head if he tries to force himself on me.”

  “They don’t need to force themselves on women,” Piper muttered. “If anything, I would imagine it’s the other way around. We’re probably such an ano
maly, it has made them chase after us.

  “But I know this momentary thrill they’re feeling won’t last. The second we let them catch us long enough to wangle a proposal out of them, they’ll run so fast we won’t have to dump them.”

  “Piper has a point,” Olivia said over her shoulder. “Before we left Kingston, you were the one who reminded us we had to try hard to find a husband, Greer.

  “To be honest, at this point I’d rather be wined and dined for the next twenty-four hours than have to go home and work my head off for another $5,000 only to have to give it back to Mr. Carlson.”

  Greer stared blindly out the back window. “Mr. Carlson’s an idiot. Can you believe he actually bought all that gobbledygook about some attorney for the House of Parma-Bourbon clearing us?”

  “Still, he was Daddy’s attorney,” Piper reminded her. “And Daddy did stipulate what the money was to be used for.”

  Yup. There was no way getting around that salient fact. Greer frowned to see that her sisters were ninety-nine percent won over to the idea of carrying out their original plan.

  “Has it occurred to you the crew might sail off into the sunset and never be seen again?”

  “No—” they both said at once.

  It was a dumb question since it would never occur to Greer either. “Okay, but don’t cry foul to me if we discover them waiting for us at some disreputable bar on the waterfront where they hang out with the handiest female upstairs.”

  “Greer!”

  “Don’t be so touchy, Olivia. I’m only thinking of the movies I’ve seen about undercover agents and their sleazy apartments.”

  “I think we all recognize these playboys aren’t secret agents,” Piper declared. “So where do we go from here?”

  Olivia smiled. “Let’s leave the car and the keys at the rental place. Since the crew enjoys undercover work, let them figure out where to find it.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Yeah.”

  Once again they found themselves driving on the outskirts of Genoa. After making several inquiries they spotted the sporting goods store pointed out to them. However there wasn’t a rental bike to be had at any price.

  “So we’ll buy the cheapest ones they have and take them home on the plane with us.”