I grinned and kissed the top of his nose. I stared into his beautiful eyes. "Oh, I love you Diablo. I love you to death. I don't know where I would be if I hadn't met you. In a way it's like you saved me."
He wiped my tears away and planted a tender kiss of my forehead. "You already wifee. I just wanna make the shit official."
I cuddled up next to him and fitted my face comfortably in his warm, good smelling neck. I inhaled the familiar scent of his Cartier cologne and sighed. I was so attached to him. I didn't know if I could breathe without Diablo. That was a scary ass feeling.
"Whenever you ready sweetie, go and see your sister. A'ight?"
"Mmm hmm. I will when I'm ready."
I felt him nod, but he didn't say anything. How could I have ever even thought of El that way? It was wrong as hell. I loved Ablo, and I didn't doubt that one bit. After all those years I knew that I was still deeply in love with him, and I'd never mess up what we had.
* * *
Diablo had been holding it in. He couldn't believe Carmen had confronted Yanna like that. He was furious because he'd always kept his bitches in check. Most of them didn't fuck with Yanna because Yanna was known for throwing some serious hands. Some didn't fuck with her because they wanted to keep things cool with Ablo. They didn't want to fuck up their chance to be with him, even if it was only long enough to bust a quick nut. He hadn't fucked with Carmen since Yanna caught them, and that's what had pissed her off. Yanna was also known for not fighting fair, so he was surprised that Carmen had stepped to her. She'd cut a bitch, and it was never because she was losing the fight. Yanna just did shit out of spite. Or as she would say "because I can mufucka."
He pulled up to Carmen's apartment complex. For a minute he thought he saw a dude through the broken space in one of the blinds. Two or three seconds later he only saw Carmen. Maybe he was just seeing shit. "Damn!" He said as he dropped ashes on his dark blue, starched to a crease IceBerg Jeans. He opened the door and stood up shaking the ashes onto the ground. He closed the door, activated the alarm, and made his way up the steps to the second floor. He stood in front of apartment 2E and knocked. He looked at his watch. It was 11:15 p.m. He knocked again, but harder this time.
Carmen opened the door. "Fuck you mufucka! Fuck you and your bitch!" Her eye was black and half closed. Her bottom lip was swollen and she had some scratches on her face and neck.
Diablo's face broke out into an amused grin. "Oh you wanna do me and my girl now? I'll see if she down. Yo', I don't mean no harm 'cause I don't like for my girl to fight, but damn," he laughed. "My baby fucked you up!"
"You ain't shit! I don't want you anyway. I was using your ass for your paper!" She yelled.
"What the fuck you get bitch? Huh?" He had a look on his face that shut Carmen up. "You used me to be wit' a nigga who got paper 'cause you ain't get shit but some good dick and a light bill paid here and there. Your stank ass ain't shit! Your stank ass pussy ain't worth a damn. Why the fuck you step to my lady? I warned your stupid ass, but nol, you had to catch feelings. Couldn't take that shit for what it was. Maybe I fucked you too good. I don't know, but you knew 'bout my woman. See, let me tell you sumthin'. I give Yanna platinum, gold, pay all her bills, keep her in minks and chinchillas in the winter, keep Gucci and Prada on her feet, keep the hottest designers in her closet, pedicures, manicures, the whole nine. I keep Louis, Coach and Fendi on her shoulder wit' enough cash to shop 'till she dizzy. On top of all that she got three whips to choose from. You can only imagine the first class trips, the cruises, the spas and expensive salons, tailor made shit to fit her and only her, dining at the finest eateries." He cleared his throat. "Oh yeah, what you get again? Nothin' but played 'cause you deep throated my dick thirty minutes after I hit my girl raw. I didn't even bother to wash my dick 'cause you a dirty bitch. Now you know what good pussy taste like. Stupid bitch." He turned and walked to his Mercedes. He got in and looked up. She was still standing there staring at him with anger and revenge in her eyes. He started the car up and drove off. "Fuck her. That bitch scared to do shit," he said trying to convince himself that it was the truth.
* * *
After almost a whole month without talking to my sister I decided to pay Maya a visit. I wanted her to go with me to see ma. We didn't go to see daddy together anymore, but I needed her for this trip. Daddy was worried about us, and had practically given the same speech that Diablo had given me. I was convinced that it was time for me to let it go. I agreed with the two men in my life. I knocked on the door and waited. For some reason I was nervous as hell.
Maya opened the door and a smile replaced the strained look on her face. She hugged me. "Yanna, I'm so sorry," she cried. I knew that she was crying without even looking at her. She wasn't crying all loud, but I knew my sister.
"Can I come in Maya?" I asked laughing.
"Oh, yeah," she pulled away, wiped her eyes, and stepped aside for me to walk in.
"Look Maya I was really upset with you for not tellin' me about Ju bein' Lexus' daddy," I started but Maya stopped me.
"Mel's in there," she whispered. She'd been trying to seduce him all day, but like always he ignored her and played with Lexus.
"You still haven't told him yet?" I asked lowering my voice. "I saw Ju a lil' while after that day and we had our words. I told him that I was through wit' you and ya'll had to work this shit out between you two. I see ain't shit changed. I'm through wit' it after I say this. You need to come out with the truth. If not for you, Ju and Mel do it for my niece."
"You came to preach didn't you Yanna?" She said accusingly.
"No. I came to ask you to got wit' me to see ma."
She smiled. "Of course. We can take Lex. She ain't seen her in a while. She'll be so happy."
She ran off to get ready and I sat down on the couch. A few minutes later Mel walked into the room and sat down. "All of a sudden she look just like that nigga," he said with a miserable look on his face. My boy Mel was in pain. He rested his head in his hands. "Man, this shit is killin' me. Yanna, I love baby girl though, that won't change. I been there wit' Maya since the day she found out. I went with' her to her doctor appointments. We was a'ight and then boom! This shit here. I ain't have a doubt in my mind about her bein' mine." He shook his head.
I didn't know what to say. I could neither condemn nor defend Maya. "You gotta try and keep the peace in this situation for that little girl. She's the most important thing. You the only daddy she know. You gotta remember that this ain't her fault," I said offering some of my own wisdom.
Mel stood up and looked at me. He smiled a half smile. "True," he nodded walking to the door. "A'ight Yanna." He closed the door softly.
Maya came in the room about ten minutes later with a yawning Lexus. I took my niece and sat down on the sofa.
"Hey Pooh Bear," I kissed her chubby, brown cheeks. She smiled and made soft baby sounds. "We goin' to see grandma," I said tickling her neck. Lexus giggled and blew spit bubbles. I loved her sweet baby smell. I loved my niece and I made peace with Maya for the sake of family. They were my family.
"I'm ready," Maya said and grabbed the diaper bag.
* * *
Ma's eyes lit up when she saw us. She looked good. "Ma, how are you doin'?" I asked and kissed her cheek.
"I'm doin' good," she said.
Maya hugged her tightly. "Hey ma."
"Hi baby. Oh, my grandbaby. Give me my grandbaby," she begged.
Her and sang to her. Lexus stopped whining and cooed softly. Maya smiled at me knowingly.
Ma used to sing to me when I was a little girl. She had a beautiful voice. This was way before she'd gotten strung out. Maya didn't have the chance to meet the good mother I had.
"She's so sweet Maya. She look just like you when you were a baby. Head full of pretty, curly hair, and huge cheeks," ma laughed. "You both were beautiful babies. Now you're beautiful young women. Just like I used to be. Your daddy and me did real good when we made ya'll. We sure did. I remember when I was you
ng, and beautiful," she looked like she was seeing it all over again. "I just had to have him. He was fine and powerful, and he had lots of money. You know mama don't keep no secrets. Ya'll can learn from my mistakes. You know that I used to be an exotic dancer. Not a stripper honey, shit, I was a high priced bitch. I had to get paid. They called me the Seductress. I had white business men paying top dollar for me to give them a lap dance. That's how I met ya'll daddy. He was the finest man I'd ever seen in my life, and I'd seen some fine ass men. On top of that he had enough money to make me stop dancin'. He did everything for me. He even made sure that I had my endless supply of drugs. Now, was that love or what?" She asked sarcastically.
"Ma...please," I said.
She put her hand up. "Let me finish," she said.
I shut up.
"Even after I stopped dancin' I still got attention from men. I carried myself wit' so much class and sophistication that I attracted all types of men with money. They all offered to take care of me. I took their gifts, because I loved material things. It was an addiction for me, among other things. I hadn't done anything but smoke weed and sniff a little coke back then. I was still on top of my game. I was a female player. I loved your daddy, but I had to have other men. He gave me alot, but I was greedy. I would leave for days at a time, and visit other men out of town. Your daddy found out about one of them. His name was Abdul and he lived in Miami, Florida. I'd met him at a restaurant down there. He was so sexy, and smart. I was falling for him, and I'd planned to take you both and leave your daddy for him. Ya'll were both babies. Maya you was one and a half, and Yanna you were four. Somehow your daddy found out about us. When I got back home from my last weekend with Abdul your daddy whooped my ass. I had to have my jaw wired shut. I didn't hear from Abdul again. I always suspected that your dad had done something to him. I didn't press charges. I was scared. I cut all the men I was dealing wit' loose. I couldn't chance him doin' that to somebody else. A couple months later he gave me a rolled up joint. That joint changed my life because it was weed mixed with crack. I was gone after that. He had me right where he wanted me, and his revenge took away my dignity and my beauty. The two things he despised about me after I cheated. All I'm tryin' to say is a man will either make you or break you. Your daddy loved me, but he broke me. True, I'd hurt him by cheatin' but he did the worst thing he could've ever done to the mother of his kids. I loved ya'll, but I couldn't be a good mother. The drugs took over. He regret what he did now, but it's too late. I'm already torn down. He love ya'll though and I'll never dispute that. Just don't let a man drag you in the dirt and bring you down. If it gets that bad leave, before it's too late."
We listened attentively knowing that mama wouldn't tell us anything wrong.
Chapter 10
It was four nineteen in the morning and the sound of Diablo's Mercedes pulling up tugged me out of my already restless sleep. I opened my eyes and looked at the clock. "This nigga," I sighed.
I heard his footsteps a few minutes later and waited patiently for him to enter the room. I had some words for him. I knew he had certain street duties, but he needed to be put in check. Four in the mornin' on a Tuesday? He was pushing it. He opened the bedroom door and stepped inside. He was trying to walk lightly, but he couldn’t. I heard every step. I even heard the door latch catch as he closed it.
I sat up in the bed. "Where the fuck you been?" I asked. I was still groggy, but I had enough energy to fuck with him.
"Chillin', drinkin' wit' my niggas. What you been doin'?" He asked.
"Don't turn this shit around. I asked you a question."
He didn't say anything.
"You full of shit nigga!" I yelled.
"Chill Yanna. You got fuckin' issues. You know that?" He asked.
"Hell yeah, and it's your fault! You make me like this mufucka!" I was up now and all up in his face.
He pushed me away. "Why you always gotta be thinkin' a nigga foolin' around on your ass. I told you what's up. I been faithful to your ass and you still trippin'. I'm a grown ass man. I can stay out 'till four in the fuckin' mornin' if I feel like it. I done told you already. I was at the bar wit' the fellas. We was poppin' bottles of Chandon and Petron. It was some broads in there, but none of them ain't have shit on you. Mmm, a nigga drunk, but I'd be foolish to keep dippin' out on you. I ain't goin' fuck up again and lose my world. You my baby girl, and I love you. All I wanted to do is get to this mufucka and crawl in the bed and push up on that juicy, fat ass." He leaned over and kissed my pouting lips.
"So I'm trippin' for nothin'?" I asked. He'd reacted totally different from what I'd expected.
"Hell yeah you trippin' for nothin'. I love you to death baby. How many times I gotta say that shit. What? You want me to yell it from the fuckin' roof?" He asked.
"You so silly. Hell no, I don't need you to yell it to prove it. I want you to show me Ablo. Stop comin' in late on fuckin' week nights. Have some respect for me. We engaged now. We don't just go together no more. If we takin' this to the next level it's time you act like it and get your shit together. You hear me?" I asked. "You make me think shit Ablo. I don't wanna think you cheatin'. I wanna believe you, but you make it hard," I whined.
"I'll start respectin' you more baby. No more comin' home late on weekdays. I promise. You right. I should be actin' like I got a fiancé at home now. He kissed my neck as I stretched out on the bed. He rubbed my nipples through the soft fabric of my nightie. His hand traveled down and reached under my little baby blue, silk nightie from my favorite Dior boutique. I didn't have any panties on and now he knew it.
"Damn girl, did I almost miss out on this just to get drunk. You wet as hell," he said licking his fingers. He reached under my nightie again and rubbed his pointer and middle fingers against my clit in a circular motion. He then went down and put my clit in his warm, moist mouth. He teased it with his tongue and softly put two fingers, and then three inside of me. My body jerked and my back arched. A soft, sensual moan rushed from my lips. He'd found my spot.
"Ablo, damn," I said breathlessly as he sucked, licked, and wrapped his thick lips around my pearl. He pulled me into his mouth and sucked and licked until my clit swelled beyond its limit.
"Mmmm, Yanna, you taste so good," he said leaving my clit for a while and concentrating on my pussy as a whole. He licked, and sucked and kissed. I grabbed his head and clutched it with my thighs when he stuck his tongue inside of me. "Ohhh, shit," I gasped. His tongue started stroking my swollen clit again and I was so close to orgasm. That's when I heard the gun shots. I didn't think he heard them because he kept slurping my clit into his mouth, using his tongue and his lips until my juices soaked the sheets. The orgasm felt so good I didn't hear the gun shots again until the window shattered and the bullets hit the wall.
Diablo grabbed me and pulled me under him onto the floor. Gunshots tore through the apartment. He pushed me under the bed and grabbed his sawed off from under the mattress. "Stay here," he whispered.
"Nigga, hell no. I'm goin' have your back papi, you know that. Give me a piece. For real Ablo. Them niggas ain't just shootin' at you. They shootin' at me too."
There were a few more shots.
"Stay here woman. I protect you. Not the other way around. You goin' be my wife," he kissed me. He pulled away and walked out of the apartment. I heard him shooting and then I heard the sound of the other gun. Suddenly the shots stopped.
I heard Ablo reenter the bedroom; at least I hoped it was him. When I saw him I exhaled.
"They drove away all fast and shit," he said taking my hand. It was trembling. Not because I was scared of them niggas that were shooting. I didn't want my baby to get shot, or killed. I knew that what he did was dangerous, but I often saw him as invincible. I knew the thought wasn't realistic, but it kept me from worrying myself to death.
"Baby, did you see the car?" I asked.
"Nol, it was too dark, and the car was a dark color. Maybe black, or dark blue. Could be anybody. We both got enemies," he sighed.
"I'm just glad you okay," I kissed him deeply. He still had my essence on his moustache, and I could taste my salty juices on his tongue.
"Your man a'ight love. I ain't tryin' to leave you yet."
We hugged for a few minutes and then he abruptly pulled away. "We can't stay here. I know somebody done called the cops. Besides, I gotta make sure nothin' happens to you. If it was just me I'd stay here and wait till them mufuckas come back. We goin' go to the 'burbs till shit calm the fuck down."
Forbidden Fruit Page 13
