Moving carefully, I slide down the bed until my head is just even with Audra's beautiful, larger than ever breasts. She's become so sensitive, I think it might be possible, and I lower my head, kissing the upper swell of soft, silky skin, nibbling and tasting her delicious flesh. Audra hums, cooing in her sleep as I kiss lower, opening her nightshirt to kiss around her right breast.
“Mmmm..... what are you doing?” Audra asks half sleepily. “I thought I was still dreaming.”
“I'm hungry... I think I want milk for breakfast,” I tease, licking Audra's nipple. She gasps, pressing her nipple into my mouth as I start to suck, drawing deeply and pulling until I'm rewarded with the sweet taste of her milk. I drink, relishing the taste while I squeeze and play with her left nipple, Audra moaning softly in the soft morning light.
Audra puts her right hand on the back of my head while her other hand reaches down, rubbing slowly at her sleep panties and I can smell her arousal in the air. I'm quickly hard as a rock but this is about her and the pleasure I can bring to her, not my cock. Guided by her sighs and moans, I use my hands to caress her skin, moving around to take her other nipple into my mouth as her hips start to lift off the bed, her fingers speeding up. “Tauren.... oh, yes....”
“I love you,” I whisper around her nipple, drinking deeply and looking her in the eyes. She strokes my hair, smiling at me until her breath catches and she moans, her thighs quivering as an orgasm rolls through her. I smile and keep drinking until she pushes my head away with a quaking hand, and I let go, moving up to kiss her tenderly. “Good morning.”
“You wake me up like that every morning and our son is going to be very upset with you for stealing his breakfast,” Audra says shakily, smiling softly. “I don't think I can tell you no, though. That was... thank you.”
“I'll make sure to only do that... once or twice a week,” I tease, stroking her face. “I just realized that it's been a while since I focused just on you, and not on myself too. It was nice, remembering what's the most important thing in the world is you.”
Audra nods, then looked down, seeing my tented pajama pants. “And that? Would you like me to help you with that?”
I shake my head, adjusting myself carefully. “Not yet. Maybe after breakfast, if Jensen and Kelbara don't want to shoot me. Last night was amazing, but I need to feel like I deserve it before we do that again.”
“They won't want to shoot you,” Audra says, taking my hand. “They'll understand, trust me. Let's get dressed, maybe there's time for a short walk in the garden before they get here.”
As it is, we see two hoverbikes swing over the palace walls just as Audra and I step outside, and we shrug, delaying the walk for later. Going hand in hand we approach the shuttle landing pad, waiting for Jensen and Kelbara to get off their bikes. They approach warily, Jensen's eyes still hard and hurt. “Tauren.”
“Jensen,” I reply, before stepping forward and kneeling like I did with Audra yesterday. “I beg your forgiveness, my friend, and brother. And you too, Kelbara. I beg your forgiveness for what I've done to you.”
Jensen stares at me, and I'm not sure if he's surprised or still angry with me, but Kelbara kneels in front of me, taking my hand. “Tauren... there is no need for this.”
“There is, Kelbara. I did things I'm not proud of, things that put you two in terrible positions,” I reply, looking her in the eye. If anything, bowing like this to them isn't enough, it's just a symbol, but I should start somewhere. “My beautiful sister, I hurt you. I'm sorry, and I wish I could take it all back.”
Kelbara shakes her head and stands up, urging me to my feet. “Come, Tauren. Let's have breakfast, and then we can discuss apologies and all of that.”
Jensen says nothing but goes inside, Audra staying with him, and Kelbara tugs my arm, having me stay behind to whisper in my ear. “I've had a chance to cry about this. He hasn't, he's got a lot bottled up. It'll take him longer to let it go.”
“Forgive me if you choose, but don't forget my mistakes, Kelbara. I need your help just as much as Audra does,” I say, turning to her. “I'll explain inside.”
Kelbara and I go to the dining room, where Jensen and Audra are talking together softly, Jensen shaking his head as Audra says something to him. “I know that Audra, but...”
Jensen sees me, and stops, closing his mouth and sitting down at one of the places set at the table, saying nothing as the staff brings in breakfast and lays it out in front of us, a healthy but still comforting spread that I asked the kitchen to prepare mostly for Audra and her tastes over the past few months. Still, Kelbara looks hungry, and I nod. “Please, everyone, dig in.”
Kelbara and Audra pick up their spoons to start on the yogurt I think, but Jensen looks at me, his eyes still barely readable. Finally, he folds his hands in front of him and purses his lips before speaking. “Do you think I should forgive you that quickly? A delicious breakfast for pushing me and Kelbara past the line? For lying to us and keeping secrets, for not trusting us? There isn't enough pancake syrup on the planet to make up for that.”
I set my fork down and nod, looking at Jensen. “You're right. Jensen, looking back over what I did with that lie, and then later the way I argued with you in the garden, I wouldn't be surprised if you never forgave me. But I can hope, and ask for your forgiveness, and the chance to be the man that you once embraced as a brother. Jensen, you are my brother in every way, and I abused that trust and relationship. I'm sorry.”
“Stand up,” Jensen says, getting out of his chair and coming over, standing over me. I get up, knowing what's coming even before his fist flies out, catching me square in the jaw and sending me tumbling backward and into the wall. Audra and Kelbara watch the whole thing without moving, and Jensen stands over me, his eyes glaring before he offers me his hand and helps me to my feet. “If you ever, and I mean ever, lie to me like that again, it's not going to be just one punch. You're going to need every Royal Lancer in this house to keep me from giving you a royally deserved ass kicking.”
I nod, touching my lip and hissing at the sting from where I've been cut. “If I ever do what I did to you guys again, then I deserve said ass kicking.”
Jensen nods, then grabs me, embracing me and pounding me on the back. I hug him back, and Jensen lets go, sitting down and picking up his fork. I look at Kelbara, who's looking at me with her eyes twinkling. “So, do you want to get a lick in too?”
“No, I think I'm okay with the breakfast,” Kelbara says before reaching over and taking Audra's hand. “Tell me, Audra, do you think all men only settle their differences with beating the crap out of each other?”
“In my opinion, it's why we should run the show instead of them,” Audra says with a chuckle. “More tea and pancakes, fewer punches. On the other hand, women hold grudges a lot longer than men, I've heard. Although if you want to kick Tauren's ass I totally understand.”
I sit down and pick up my fork, trying to decide what to eat before settling on the sausage, it won't make my lip sting as much as the citrus fruits. “I agree. Jensen, Kelbara, while I think my goal of ending the war quickly is still the right one, the way I went about trying to do it, that was dead wrong. I tried to be a gamesmaster like Mogar, and I forgot that first off, I'm not a gamesmaster, I'm just a man who must lead in a way that must be my own. Second, that you're my family, and I can't play you guys like a fucking game. I pledge to you now; it'll never happen again.”
“Good.... because I agree with the goal,” Kelbara says, taking a big bite of pancakes. “You want this war over quickly, and I want it over quickly too.”
“What are you saying, Kelbara?” Audra asks, and Jensen nods, concerned.
Kelbara takes a deep breath and takes Jensen's hand. “What I mean is, I'd like a few days off to rest and recover, but then... Jensen, is there still a slot in the Rangers for a Sub-Commander?”
Jensen nods, his lips twitching into a worried smile. “Of course my love. But are you sure?”
Kelbara nods, her face
serious. “I swore I would always serve you Jensen, and I intend to keep my word. I'm sure.”
I'm touched and can't say anything as breakfast continues, but when we're finished I feel it. We came into the room as two couples, but we're leaving it as one family. In the hallway, I pull Jensen aside while Kelbara and Audra talk about Audren's upcoming birth, walking with him to the foyer. “Jensen, I have another favor to ask of you.”
“What's that, Tauren?” he asks, tensing slightly.
“I need more advisors than just Mogar. He's a good planner, a wise man, but I need more than that. Would you mind if I asked you to be a bit more in the loop on decisions too?”
Jensen smiles, offering me his hand. “For my brother? Anything.”
* * *
“The guard told me a rather interesting tidbit of information when I landed,” Mogar says when he finishes settling down in the library, his scholar's tunic as rumpled as ever. “Apparently, the King of Tamaria got down on his knees and asked for forgiveness from the Commander and Sub-Commander of the Rangers. He was shocked, he'd never seen anything like that before in his life. I wondered if he was pulling my leg, but he said he was being one hundred percent honest.”
“That he was,” I reply, folding my hands on my desk. “Mogar, I realized after a much-needed yelling at from my wife that I can't be you. You've got a brain that does things I'm not sure I can ever fully understand, and I'm not an idiot. I will always owe you a debt for opening my eyes to the evils of what my father's reign was inflicting on people. But I cannot be a game player, at least not on your level. There are people that I need to deal with openly and honestly. Audra, Jensen, Kelbara... I cannot and will not treat them as pawns in some game of royal chess.”
“And the Lady Gwyndolen?” Mogar asks. “She's Kelbara's mother. Is she to be included in this circle of trust as well?”
“If she reaches that level of trust with me, then perhaps. Mogar, my father's leadership was compromised because he let himself become a sort of pawn as every member of the Noble Council schemed and stabbed each other in the back. I swear your tunics should have bloody knife holes in them still. I told you when I took over that I was going to do things differently. And instead, I engage in the same stupid shit that I hated. Well, no more. I won't lead that way again.”
Mogar considers my face for a moment, then nods, tapping his chin with his finger. “You know this will make things more difficult for you. The larger your circle of trust is, the harder it is to keep secrets, and the more vulnerable you can be. What if someone tries to reach you through Jensen or Kelbara?”
“Then they'll find that I'm strong enough to make sure that circle is protected. Mogar, this isn't up for debate. I appreciate your advice, but if you cannot respect that point, then I may need to find another advisor.”
I think about what I’ve just said, and realize it's true. I've trusted Mogar my entire life, from even before he became my teacher, and thinking about the twenty years he's helped guide me, I know I wouldn't be the man I am today without his assistance. At the same time, though, if I am going to stay true to the man that I am, I have to be willing to do this, even if Mogar is upset about it.
Instead of being surprised, though, Mogar smiles, the right side of his mouth quirking up in the expression he makes when he's surprised. “Well, well, well, I wasn't sure if you really did have it in you, Tauren.”
“What?” I ask, feeling a little flare of anger. “Don't tell me this was all just another test from you, Mogar. I'm not in the mood right now, my mouth still hurts where Jensen popped me. It wasn't even full strength, but still, the man packs a wallop.”
Mogar shakes his head, licking his lips for a moment as he considers how he wants to respond. “No, it wasn't a test. I did wonder which path you'd take once I saw that there was stress on your family relationships, but there was never a test. Tauren, that's one thing that honestly holds you back from understanding the way I think, the one preconceived notion you have about me that you still haven't let go of. You have, from the time we started and I became your tutor, seen every challenge I comment on as being some sort of test, set up by the Games master to push you in a certain direction. The truth is... I haven't given you a test in over ten years.”
“Then what do you do?” I ask, intrigued. “Because you have a way of making comments and asking questions that sure as fuck makes it seem like you're constantly testing me.”
“I merely point out possibilities, that's all. Of course, I have goals, I wanted you to be a better King than Joren was when you took the throne, and I will admit I made sure you got captured by Jensen. But the way you two gained respect for each other, you falling in love with Audra, the brotherly relationship you've started to develop with Kelbara... I've only sat back and watched you become the man you have grown into being,” Mogar says. “The tests you talk about, they're just a normal part of life. They're tests only in the sense that life is a constant series of tests, put forth not by some Games master but by the heaven and stars themselves. My only goal for this plan was to try to bring the war to an end faster. If you'll remember, I never told you or advised you to keep Jensen or Kelbara in the dark on it, just that the more people you included, the harder it would be to pull off.”
His voice has that same sort of ironic lecturing tone that he used to use when I was his dedicated student, and just like then his words piss me off, but even still I can see his point. He's right, he never did tell me not to bring Jensen and Kelbara in on the plan. That was my own insecurities and fears that did that. In fact, I can't blame Mogar for any of the problems, that weight lays firmly on my shoulders. It's a heavy fucking weight, although it's lightened a little bit by this morning's forgiveness.
“So what did you mean by saying you didn't think I had it in me?” I ask after a moment, not sure if I can take Mogar totally at his word. I trust that he has my well-being in mind, but after two decades of not being able to take him at his surface word, I can't help but wonder if he's still gaming me. Even still, I'd like to know what he wants to say.
Mogar purses his lips, then nods, as if he's talking to himself. “I wondered if you were strong enough to be willing to make yourself vulnerable. It's the sign of a true leader, Tauren. The question I have now is.... how far are you willing to extend that vulnerability?”
I go to open my mouth when there's a knock at the door, and Pretton sticks his head in. “Highness, I apologize for the interruption... but there's been another bombing.”
“Oh fuck,” I groan, my stomach sinking. “Where?”
Pretton swallows but squares his shoulders. “At Lord Jensen's estate, Sire.”
I think I knock Pretton down as I run past him on the way to my hoverbike.... but to be honest, I'm running so fast I'm not sure.
Chapter 16
Kelbara
I feel lighter when I get off my hoverbike, an invisible weight lifted off my shoulders, and I need to double check my wrists to see that I don't have exercise wrist straps attached. Jensen notices and laughs. “What're you looking for?”
“Grav pods,” I admit. “Remember when we had the Rangers go through a week of training where everyone wore them all day every day?”
Jensen nods, smirking. “We started with ten kilograms and increased by fifty percent each day. Fifteen, Twenty-two and a half, thirty-three, fifty, seventy-five, and finally a hundred and twelve. You were moving pretty slow by the end there.”
“I wasn't the only one,” I retort, remembering even Jensen looking like he was about to drop when his every movement felt like he weighed over two hundred kilograms total. Not that I could say much, I was carrying more than that percentage wise. “Remember that last march? Ten kilometers that felt like a marathon.”
Jensen nods, laughing. “What was the pace, ten minutes a kilometer by the end of everything? Yeah, I remember that. Why?”
“After it was over, we could turn off those damn pods, and it felt amazing. Right now, I feel the same way. Like a giant
weight's off my body.”
Jensen nods, taking me by the hand and pulling me in tight. “I know just what you mean. I wasn't liking who I was becoming the past few weeks.”
Jensen lifts me up into a deep, powerful kiss, my body thrilling at the contact. His hand comes down to cup my ass when there's a discreet cough from behind me, and we stop kissing long enough to see Mom standing there, a knowing smile on her face. “Well, I guess breakfast with Tauren and Audra went better than expected? Especially since it's after lunch now?”
Jensen laughs and sets me down, going over to Mom and picking her up just like me and swinging her around before giving her a big kiss on the cheek. “Gwyndolen, I can't tell you everything, but yes, it did. And have I mentioned you look beautiful today?”
Mom laughs, pushing away from Jensen with a shake of her head. “Let go you big idiot. Kelbara, take your man inside and go make sure he's properly worn out before he gets himself in trouble. I'm going to head back to the palace, I'll see you guys later.”
Mom mounts her hoverbike and lifts off, giving us a wave before she flies off, and I go over to Jensen, smacking him on the butt. “Down, buddy. You're not getting a mother-daughter three-way.”
Jensen shakes his head, smacking my ass right back and making me jump, rubbing at my right butt cheek but grinning still. “Not interested in that at all. You're all the woman I'll ever need. I was just happy because I realized something right when we were interrupted.”
“What's that?” I ask, coming back over and wrapping my arms around Jensen's waist. “That you're so going to take me to bed for the next twelve to twenty-four hours or so?”
“Mmmmm, that thought came when I smacked your ass,” Jensen growls tenderly, stroking my hair. “No, what made me happy was that, even though I was going down the wrong path, I realized that I was strong enough to stop and turn around. I could have let my anger loose against Tauren... but I'm strong enough to not have to.”
Red Planet: The Rebel War (Tamarians Book 3) Page 14
