by Mann, Marni
“I think he does, and I’m holding her hand right now.”
I squeezed his fingers. “If keeping him alive means having him far away, then I can live the rest of my life talking to him over the phone. No more death, Cameron. I can’t handle it.”
He nodded. “You know you’re going to make him as happy as you make me. How do you feel about that?”
The waiter returned to our table with a large plate of bread and a bowl of oil and fresh garlic that he set between us. He uncorked the bottle of red and poured a sample for Cameron to try. He humbly swallowed the small serving that was in his glass and nodded. He would have accepted the wine even if he hadn’t liked it as much as something he’d had in the past. That was just the type of person he was: genuine, unpretentious. True.
“If Victoria is truly who he wants, then I guess I’m glad that I’m the one who gets to reunite them.” I rubbed my palms over my thighs to dry the sweat before I reached for the glass the waiter had poured for me. “He deserves to be happy, to feel what we do, even if it’s with her.”
“How fucked up is that? Even when you’re not in the mansion, she’s still telling you what to do.”
I shook my head. Cameron had never met her; he didn’t understand her powers of manipulation. “I made the choice, but I didn’t do it for her; I did it for my father. I’m more relieved that he’ll have a chance to be happy. If it pleases him that she came here, then it was all worth it.” I took another long sip of my wine. “I honestly still can’t make any sense of it. She’s beautiful, she’s younger than him, she’s sexy…but I just expected him to be with someone else—anyone but her, I guess.”
Cameron ripped a small chunk of bread off the loaf and dipped it into the oil. Then he reached across the table again and fed it to me. I kept my eyes on him as I spread my lips to take it into my mouth. My tongue danced around the soft, white cloud of the center and the rough skin of the crust. His eyes told me how much my mouth had aroused him.
“Do you think you’ll ever be able to accept her?” he asked.
“I’m in no position to judge her, and I’ll never be okay with her. But I won’t have to spend any time with her. It’s not like she’s going to be my stepmom or anything.”
“I wouldn’t rule that out.”
“No more moms for me. I had one…it didn’t go well.”
I waited for Lilly to crawl into my head, like I’d summoned her somehow by mentioning the word “mom.” She’d been rather quiet lately. I braced for her response, but nothing came.
Maybe she was finally gone for good.
He squeezed my hand. “I think what you’ve done for them is more than enough. I’m proud of you for being okay with that much.”
“Thank you.” I squeezed back and met his stunning stare. “What do you have planned for the next few days?”
“You know I won’t tell you that.”
I laughed. He was the one chewing on his lip now. “Oh no? What if I kept something from you…withheld something I know you really want?”
His eyes opened wide. “You wouldn’t do that.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “Try me, Mr. Hardy.”
His mouth spread into a grin and he glanced in both directions, checking the faces of the people nearby. I wasn’t sure what he was doing until his eyes landed on me again…and his arm dipped under the table, hid by the long cloth. His fingers marched up my thigh. They stopped when they reached the sensitive spot right against my zipper. “It goes both ways, Ms. Williams. Don’t forget that…or how much you begged for my mouth back in that shower. You know how much I love giving it to you. Don’t make me keep that from you.”
Wetness began to pool under the spot that he rubbed. He knew that’s all it took to turn me on. He was that strong, that seductive. My nipples began to ache for his touch. My mouth wanted to bite his skin.
I lifted the wine glass off the table and finished the small amount that was left. “I think maybe I’m ready to take that swim with you.”
“In the ocean?”
I nodded.
“Now,” he insisted.
“Now?” He caught me by surprise. “But what about our food…and our wine?”
“They can keep it,” he said as he downed the rest of the wine in his glass. He reached into his wallet and threw several bills on the table. “I’ll be eating out.”
That made me laugh out loud. “We’re not very good at this withholding thing, are we?”
“Nope,” he said, “not at all.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me from the table, leading us back in the direction of our villa. “In my whole life, I’ve never been so fucking happy to be so bad at something.”
CHAPTER THIRTY
CAMERON AND I ARRIVED AT THE CAFÉ thirty minutes early. We wanted a chance to relax before my father and Victoria showed up, and maybe order a drink or two. I knew I was going to need something to help me through it. My father had chosen this spot; he wanted it to be a fairly public place in an open market while one of his security guards swept the villa we had rented. I didn’t question his choices; I just agreed to whatever he had requested on the phone and passed the information on to Victoria. I was nothing but their messenger in all of this.
We took our seats and quickly realized we wouldn’t get the chance to lighten the edge with a glass of wine…not without a little unwanted company. Before the waiter even appeared, Victoria had sat down at our table. She wore a low-cut sundress that hugged her waist and emphasized her breasts. Her makeup was subdued, her hair simple in a low ponytail. Her flat sandals made her about three inches shorter. It was as casual as I had ever seen her. I had almost expected her to be in disguise—a hat and sunglasses, at least, though it only would have drawn unwanted attention. This outfit—one that didn’t include a mask—was much more revealing; it showed me how real she was, how small she could be. She looked almost vulnerable.
And familiar…too familiar. Maybe it was her more natural look that was really emphasizing the contours and characteristics of her face.
I glanced at her as I made the introductions. “This is”
“I already know,” she said, extending her hand in his direction. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Cameron.” Her tone and smile were just a bit flirtatious. “You’re very talented…I love your work.”
He blushed and looked away.
“I assume you had a good flight?” I asked.
She fidgeted with her bracelets. “It was long…and tiring. I’m glad to be back on solid ground.” I didn’t really mean for her to give a full explanation about how she felt. I should have known better than to ask, even if it was just to be polite.
A waiter came to our table and poured water in each of our glasses.
“Victoria, do you have a wine preference?” Cameron asked.
She used the menu to fan her face. It was hot outside, but it wasn’t scorching. Even so, there was a thin layer of sweat above her lip and across her forehead. “I’d rather have a Bellini,” she said to the waiter. “And make it a strong one.”
Cameron ordered a bottle of pinot noir for us. I hoped the wine would help settle the knots in my stomach. My belly had been tight all morning and I couldn’t get rid of the feeling. It was more than being anxious to see my father again; it was Victoria’s presence causing these emotions inside me. I still didn’t know what to make of her. But I wouldn’t let my guard down for a minute.
She leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs as the waiter left. Rather than making polite conversation or pretending to be interested in us, she reached inside her purse and removed a tissue, blotting it over her face. “This heat is just too much.”
Cameron and I just looked at each other.
“Do you plan on staying in Italy, Victoria?” Cameron asked. “Or is this just a stop in your travels?”
Her toes bounced on the ground, shaking her legs and rocking her body. “That depends entirely on what happens with Marvin. I’m hoping he’ll want me to stay.”
“Yo
u came all this way not knowing if he would?” I asked.
Her eyes slowly moved to me. I had always wilted a little under the intensity of her stare. It was even deeper now, more intimate and more revealing. But this time, I kept my eyes locked on hers without flinching.
“Your father is a peculiar man,” she replied. “I couldn’t begin to predict his reaction to seeing me here.” She should have thought about that before she flew across an entire ocean to get to him.
The waiter returned and began opening our bottle. My phone rang just as the cork popped. It wasn’t my personal cell; it was the one my father had given me. My stomach instantly tightened even more and my hands began to shake. I could even feel my forehead start to sweat like Victoria’s. There were still twenty minutes before he was supposed to meet us.
I could only hope nothing had gone wrong.
“Hello?”
“Change of plans,” my father said. “Do you see the black Mercedes parked to the left of where you’re sitting?”
I leaned forward, scanning the sidewalk and the cars parked all along. “Yes.”
“I want the three of you to slowly leave the table and get into the car. The driver will bring you to me.”
I made eye contact with Cameron as he glanced between the waiter and me. “Okay. We just need to—”
“The bill is already taken care of. Don’t worry about anything; just make your way to the car.”
“Are you far from here?”
“I’ll see you soon,” he said as he ended the call.
He was always so cryptic on the phone. I could never tell if there was trouble brewing or if he was just taking extra precaution. This time, I had a feeling it was the latter. I had actually been surprised when he’d suggested we meet in a public place and come back to our villa. He was the type of man who would want us to come to him and something told me that had been the plan all along.
“Is he coming?” Victoria asked. “Is he here somewhere?”
“We have to go,” I said as I placed the phone back in my purse. “There’s a car waiting for us over there.” I nodded toward the curb. Victoria’s scheming smile wasn’t lost on me. It was uncomfortably familiar. Cameron reached for his wallet. “He already paid the bill,” I told him.
The three of us stood from our chairs and moved nonchalantly toward the Mercedes. As we approached, the driver got out of the front seat and slid the back door open. It was something of a luxury van, a model I hadn’t ever seen in the States. There were two rows of seats behind the driver. Victoria sat in the middle; Cameron and I took the back. We rode in complete silence.
During the ride, I tried to play out in my mind what would happen when I was finally in my father’s presence, how we would act around each other. I wondered if he would hug me, or if there’d be a distance between us that couldn’t be bridged by physical closeness. Or would we pick up where we’d left off, as if we’d never been apart? Our letters and phone conversations were wonderful, but face-to-face contact again might be awkward. We hadn’t exactly had a traditional start; I didn’t know why I would have expected a traditional reunion. I knew he would never be dad to me in the normal sense, but could we still share the warmth that was typical between fathers and daughters? Would his arms take me in the same way they had the morning he’d left for Europe?
The warning of his departure had come the night before he left, when he told me it would be his last in the city. He wouldn’t tell me where he was going or how he was going to get there. He didn’t promise he would ever return, either. All I knew was that he’d be gone when I woke up. I was to stay in his apartment until his attorney contacted me to let me know it was safe to finally reenter society.
I had a hard time falling asleep that night. At some ridiculous hour in the early morning, I heard a soft noise from somewhere inside my room. The feeling then came over me that someone was closely hovering. I sat up in bed and saw him standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest and his feet gently tapping the floor. I could feel his anxiety in the air, his nervous hesitation.
“Is it time for you to go?” I asked.
He nodded.
“I don’t know when I’ll see you again, but please be safe.”
“I’ll be fine…but I’ll always worry about you,” he said.
He knew I wasn’t going to leave his apartment until it was safe for me to do so. If for some reason my name were brought up in the legal morass surrounding the mansion, his attorney would help me get out of Boston. Somehow I knew it wasn’t just the mansion that would worry him. He had begun worrying about me simply because I was his daughter, like any other parent would.
“I’ll take care of myself,” I said. “I promise.” By that point, Cameron knew the truth about everything. “And I have Cameron. He’s very protective.”
“But you’re not going to have me.”
I shook my head. “No, I won’t. But just because you’re gone doesn’t mean we have to lose each other entirely…does it?”
His arms opened and, quickly leaving the bed, I fell into them. I didn’t take him for a hugger; he hadn’t been big on that sort of contact the whole time I’d been in his apartment. But resting against him then, I noticed the stiffness lessening, the awkwardness passing. I had just felt my father’s hands squeezing into my back, giving me as much comfort and reassurance as he could. And I had given him the same. That was as new for us as everything else.
Seconds later, he disappeared.
I walked toward my father with Victoria beside me. Cameron was on the other side, his hand clasped in mine. The feeling was much different from the good-bye we’d had in his apartment all those months ago. We were different; we had slowly started to learn so much more about each other in the letters we’d exchanged. We’d gradually let each other peek in on some of our darkness, and it had led us to this moment. An understanding had grown between us during every step that brought me closer to him.
And now, I saw him again.
His eyes followed as I moved up the path to the house he stood before.
I wasn’t sure how long the ride had taken, and I had no idea what part of Italy we were in now. The house had been painted bright peach; I could hear waves splashing behind me. The scent of flowers wafted to my nose—unidentified, but strongly perfumed. It all drifted by; my eyes and my attention were focused solely on my father. I hardly recognized him. His hair had been dyed black, and his irises were unlike mine anymore; he was wearing contacts. His eyes were now rich brown. His body appeared fitter, with more muscle pushing out of the sleeves of his shirt. The buttons rested over a flatter stomach. What captivated me more than anything was his smile. And it was just for me. I was within reach when his arms opened. My pace quickened to close the gap between us.
Cameron let go of my hand as I ran, and Victoria’s sandals stopped clacking on the pavement. Everything else went silent, except for his heart. It beat against my cheek.
It was like music to me.
“I’ve missed you,” he whispered. His words surprised me. As much as I wanted to hear them, I was afraid to let myself believe he’d ever say them to me.
“I’ve missed you, too,” I told him, holding back tears.
“You look so happy, so beautiful,” he said. “He’s treating you right, isn’t he?”
I nodded. “He really is.”
“I can tell.”
“There’s nobody like him. I am so lucky that he…loves me.” I’d heard him say it; I’d said it to him in return. But I’d never considered it in those terms before: Cameron loves me.
It was overwhelming.
He nodded. “And you?”
“I love him, too,” I replied.
“I’m so glad you have this—both of you.” We fell silent again, and I knew our embrace was coming to an end. “I know you just arrived, but…would you be okay if I sent you inside to get a cold drink and to make yourself comfortable? I’m afraid I haven’t given Victoria a proper hello.” His eyes wer
e suddenly on her.
I released him, the smile never leaving my face. “Sure. I’ll see you in there.”
Cameron was at my side again. I looped my arm through his as he led us up the rest of the driveway to the main entrance of the house. I glanced down the small hill and saw my father hug Victoria. Her arms were in the same place mine had been, but her hands were resting more intimately; her lips were on his, and there was suddenly more color in her cheeks, more desire in her posture. His form had changed in a similar manner.
I sighed.
It wasn’t what I would have wanted for him. But at least it seemed to make him happy.
That was all that mattered to me.
***
We sat around the dining room table, Cameron and my father at each end and Victoria and me on the sides. My father had hired a private chef for the evening, and a butler to set each plated course in front of us. There had been three rounds so far; I didn’t think I could eat another bite. But there was no other place I would rather have been than at this table.
I realized the affection between my father and Victoria wasn’t just for show, and it didn’t stop once they’d entered the house. It continued as we sat in the living room chatting and during the walk we’d taken on the beach. It was even more evident now that we’d finished a few glasses of wine. They continuously stole glances at each other—short, intimate moments that Cameron and I had noticed. We’d had a few moments like that of our own. My father had seen us together before he left, but things between Cameron and me were much deeper now, much more evolved. All of that emotion had existed months ago; it was what drove me to want to leave the mansion in the first place, before I knew the dark truth about what was really happening there. I just wasn’t strong enough to allow myself to feel the emotions, to acknowledge them.
Was this what it was like to have a family…one where everyone loved each other?
There hadn’t been any warmth at the table I had eaten at with Lilly. The Hunt’s dining room had been so formal, so sterile. We were expected to finish all our food without putting our elbows on the table, and to wipe our mouths in between bites before we could be excused. It was safe, but it was far from warm. In our apartment, Cameron and I sat at the bar and quickly finished whatever we had ordered in, so we could go back to the studio and continue working…or back to the bedroom to enjoy each other’s company in the way we loved best. We were in a house that wasn’t ours, surrounded by someone else’s belongings, in an environment that was completely foreign, and yet it felt like we belonged there. There was no rush, no rules or expectations. The conversation flowed organically—even between me and Victoria—and we didn’t drill each other with questions or make demands for answers. We weren’t here out of obligation; we were here because we wanted to be. And despite the situation and what had brought us here, we belonged here…together.
