Forbidden Addiction (Forbidden, Book #4)

by R. L. Kenderson

  “Our vampires in the St. Paul Police have heard about the SUV,” Dante said. “And we always knew it was a group, but it might be hard to catch all of them at once. Hopefully, when we catch one of them, they’ll start ratting each other out.”

  Phoenix’s agitation didn’t stem just from the fuckers out there, hurting their people. Or from all the commotion back at her alpha’s home. A big part of it had to do with the pure maleness of the vampire standing at the front of the room.

  “And the elderly woman who was hurt yesterday didn’t hear, see, or smell anything?” Quentin asked.

  Dante shook his head. “She scared off whoever was out there before she could see anything. And her sense of smell isn’t what it used to be. She couldn’t tell how many there were or if they were human, shifter, or vampire. And they must have parked a ways away. They took off on foot, and she didn’t hear or see a vehicle besides her son’s. Although her hearing and eyesight aren’t great either.”

  “Shit,” Quentin said.

  Damien barked out a humorless laugh. “Shit is right.”

  Dante nodded his head in agreement as he licked his bottom lip and then sucked on it, slowly pulling it out between his teeth, the white of his fangs prominent against the deep color of his mouth. She knew he did it because he was frustrated, but it made her think of something else entirely.

  Phoenix remembered when Dante had rescued her from Gerald.

  Gerald was Vance’s cousin who’d had big dreams of killing off the alpha and his family. During an attempt to capture Gerald, he’d escaped, shooting Saxon and Zane in the process and kidnapping Phoenix as he fled. Gerald had planned to rape her but stopped when he smelled Dante on her. He’d taken his anger out on her breasts by biting her nipples, drawing blood. Most females would have been happy that this was all that had happened to them. And Phoenix was grateful that he hadn’t raped her, but her past issues made Gerald’s punishment seem almost as bad as if he had.

  Phoenix shuddered at the memories. The memory of Gerald and the memories of others who’d come before him.

  But, after Dante had rescued her and discovered that she’d been injured, he’d healed her. With his mouth. Just thinking about it gave her hot flashes. It was the first time ever that anything had felt good when it came to her breasts. She’d had issues with them for as long as she could remember. She’d developed early, especially for a shifter, and they had brought unwanted attention to her body. But Dante had seemed to sense that she wasn’t like other women, that she needed more care, which she was thankful for and embarrassed about at the same time. She sincerely hoped it was something he had just guessed about her rather than something he knew to be true. Because the thought of Dante knowing her past bothered her.

  Saxon shifted beside her. Not many knew her past, but he did. Phoenix looked from Saxon to Dante and back to Saxon.

  Oh God. She felt panic rise in her chest.

  Saxon wouldn’t have told Dante what had happened to her, would he? The two of them had managed to become friends, and Saxon knew she had this weird…thing…with Dante. Would he have warned Dante about her past and her issues?

  She sat forward in her seat. Was that why Dante never tried to have sex with her?

  But she didn’t want to have sex with Dante. Right?

  She slumped back down in her seat and stared at her hands. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I thinking these things? She was not normally like this.

  It had to be seeing Saxon’s happy family along with the two pregnant females and all the dumb, blissful couples in her life. It was messing with her head. She had decided a long time ago that she would never be able to mate and have a family. She’d thought she had actually made peace with it.

  So, why am I acting like a stupid schoolgirl?

  She looked up and right into Dante’s handsome face, and she pictured the way he had looked at her last night with heat in his eyes.

  “Come here, Red.”

  And she had. She’d walked right over to him and let him pull her down onto his lap. She’d let him sink his beautiful fangs into her neck and take her blood. He didn’t even have to touch her anymore for the ache to settle between her legs. He’d just stuck his thumb, which he’d cut with his incisor right before he pulled her down, in her mouth, so she could take his blood, and she’d gone off like a rocket at the first taste.

  Phoenix looked away. How pathetic. She was pathetic.

  It was no wonder that Dante didn’t pressure her to have sex. He didn’t need a simple creature like her.

  He had to know she didn’t have much experience. She didn’t know why he continued to feed from her because, way back when she’d first met him, he’d told her that he fucked when he fed. And, even though she knew he’d had orgasms in the past when he fed from her, they never came close to having sex. That meant, whatever they had going on between them wouldn’t last. Couldn’t last. For all she knew, Dante was feeding from someone else. And fucking that someone.

  A light bulb went off in her head.

  Of course.

  Of course, Dante hadn’t given up his sex life to, what? Have some weird relationship with her where they didn’t even get to first base, much less go all the way.

  She felt sick.

  So, why did he continue to let her come to his home and feed from her?

  She looked up into his eyes again as she felt the room closing in on her.

  Of course.

  He felt sorry for her.

  That was why he let her feed him and why he fed her his blood, knowing she’d climax.

  Poor little damaged she-cat. She was lonely and fixated on the big, strong alpha vampire. The big, bad alpha vampire who was also kind and didn’t have the heart to tell her to get lost.

  Loser. The word taunted her. That was the word her second boyfriend had called her.

  “I’m having sex with Sheena because you’re a loser who can’t even pretend to like sex.”

  Make that pathetic loser because, when she’d been with her ex, she’d known she wasn’t doing anything for him in bed.

  But, with Dante, she’d thought he was actually getting something out of their feeding sessions.

  Phoenix stood so fast that the chair rolled out from under her and hit the wall behind her.

  “Phoenix?” Vance said, concern in his eyes. Concern she didn’t deserve.

  Vance had been disappointed that she had gone after Gerald without the rest of her pride, injuring both herself and Dante in the process. Something that could have been avoided had she asked for help. Vance hadn’t said it, but Phoenix knew she had to earn back his trust because the pride and the sentinels were a team, and she had temporarily gone rogue.

  “I have to use the restroom,” she told her alpha.

  It was a lame excuse, and she was pretty sure everyone could tell she was making it up. But it was better than staying there. And, even though they couldn’t hear what she was thinking, the thought of them all knowing her humiliation made her scramble out of there even faster.

  She practically slammed the door of the conference room open as she hurried out to rush down the hall, bypassing the first set of restrooms that stood right outside. She didn’t know how long she was going to be in there, and she didn’t need to run into anyone when she came back out.

  She’d been to L & L Construction many times and even picked up odd jobs now and then, so she knew her way around the building. The conference room was on the main floor since that was where they would bring clients to show them presentations and have meetings. Phoenix skipped the elevators and headed toward the back to enter the stairwell, taking the steps two at a time until she made it to the second floor.

  Several offices and cubicles were up there along with more than one set of restrooms. Thankfully, at that time of night, they were all empty, and everything was mostly dark, except for a few desk lamps that had been left on and the streetlights shining through the windows.

  Phoenix walked past an empty office th
at was used for excess storage and almost went in there, but she needed to go to the ladies’ room. She needed to look at herself in the mirror. She needed to face herself.

  Phoenix entered the dark restroom and leaned against the door for a minute. The silent darkness seemed creepy but didn’t scare her. She almost wished there were someone in there for her to fight because she was in the mood to kick some ass. It would be an easy way for her to vent her frustration and shame. But she was alone.

  She reached out and felt along the side of the wall until she flipped the light switch. The bright fluorescent bulbs flickered on, hurting her eyes. She let her pupils adjust and then walked further into the big room and over to the sinks, taking in her appearance in the mirror.

  Her face was pale, and her green eyes looked huge. Her hair had come loose from her ponytail, and her baggy clothes were twisted. She fixed her hair and straightened her clothes. She pinched her cheeks to give herself some color and blinked a few times to take away the deer-in-the-headlights look.

  She narrowed her eyes and told herself with conviction, “You are not that little girl anymore. You are a grown woman. You are a sentinel. You have trained to fight and to not let anyone take advantage of you again. You’re strong. You don’t need a man. And you certainly don’t need sex. You have yourself. You have your friends. You have the other sentinels, and you have your pride.”

  She paused and took in a deep breath, but this time, when she spoke, her voice lost the force behind it. “You don’t need him,” she practically whispered. “He’s just another guy. He’s nothing special. You. Don’t. Need. Him.”

  She wasn’t sure she believed her words, but she felt a little better. She had needed that reminder of how far she’d come. She’d needed to tell herself that it was okay to be alone.

  She made herself look into her eyes for a few more seconds. Then, she stuck up her chin and forced out a wobbly smile. It wasn’t the most confident, but it would do for now. She nodded in agreement and turned around to leave the restroom.

  She stopped when she saw someone by the door. She hadn’t even heard it open.

  “I’m nothing special, huh?” Dante asked.

  PHOENIX STUCK HER nose in the air and crossed her arms. “What are you doing in here?”

  Just like this female to go on the offensive and avoid his question.

  Dante stood from where he was leaning in the doorway and walked toward her. “I came to see if you were okay. You left the conference room in a hurry.”

  She dropped her arms and tried to look relaxed. “I’m fine.”

  Right. And I’m the Queen of England.

  She must have read the skepticism on his face because she added, “Well, I will be anyway. Nothing that hasn’t happened before.”

  Dante had already sensed her…sadness? No, that wasn’t right. It seemed almost like despair. He could sense it through her blood, and to hear her depressing words on top of it concerned him. It was no way to live, and his heart ached for Phoenix. For the prison she and the villains of her past had put her in.

  Dante glided closer to her until they were a foot apart. He knew he shouldn’t mess with her dignity, but he had to know. “Who were you talking about right before you turned around?”

  It was a horrible idea, asking whom she’d been referring to, and one that would likely not end with anything good, but Dante so very much wanted it to be him. He’d only been guessing when he called her out on it earlier.

  His blood link to her filled with panic. Not a scared panic but a nervous panic—to the point that he would swear that she’d let her guard slip. He smelled it in the air, too.

  He doubted she would have been nervous had she been speaking about someone other than him. And, when she didn’t answer his question, it basically confirmed his assumption.

  He was so pleased to know that he affected her, and it wasn’t just one-sided, so he let his own guard down. Phoenix’s eyes widened with confusion as, for a split second, he let his own feelings pass back through the blood she’d consumed from him.

  He shouldn’t have been too shocked at this turn of events. She had been letting him consume her blood once a month, and she’d let him make her come. But it always seemed like, before and after, she was a cold, reserved being. She would momentarily come alive in his arms, but once it was over, she always went back to being the same female he’d met months ago. If he wasn’t in the same room with her when she orgasmed, he would never believe it actually happened. All this time, part of him had assumed that she let him drink her blood because she owed him for rescuing her from Gerald and for telling her about Gerald’s whereabouts.

  To know that she continued to feed him because she wanted to changed the whole ballgame.

  But, at the same time, could anything come from it? Phoenix had some deep issues that Dante feared would never let her open up to anyone completely.

  Phoenix always seemed so strong and indifferent to many things around her. She was very loyal to her pride and obviously cared about them, but it seemed that her devotion was reserved to only them. Could Dante have penetrated the wall she’d built around herself?

  Dante studied Phoenix and tentatively lifted his hand to touch her. When she didn’t shy away, he lightly touched her hair. “You know you can trust me.” With your body. Your heart. Your mind. But he didn’t say any of that aloud because a part of him knew she would balk at his words. “I would never hurt you.” More than anything, he wanted her to know that he would die protecting her if he needed to.

  Phoenix looked up into his eyes and opened her mouth, but the words didn’t come out because both of their phones beeped, breaking whatever spell had been cast around them.

  Dante stepped away from her and pulled his mobile out of his pocket.

  Before he finished reading the message, Phoenix said, “Naya’s in labor.”

  Hunter and his fellow sentinels had been summoned to the vampire clinic. With the impending birth of Princess Naya and her mate, Vaughn’s, babies, their meeting at L & L Construction had been postponed. However, over forty-eight hours later, Naya was still in labor. The vampires’ and shifters’ fearless leaders knew they still needed to take care of the matter at hand, so they commandeered an empty room for them to finish their meeting.

  Basically, they all showed to get their assignments, which was good because they barely all fit in the much smaller space. It was not made to fit the almost twenty people who were currently crammed inside.

  Hunter was beginning to feel claustrophobic, but that could be due to the male next to him. Despite someone being behind him, in front of him, and on the other side, Hunter only seemed to be aware of Quentin.

  The wolf-shifter was shorter than Hunter but wider, and the male smelled incredible, like evergreens at Christmas, like the outdoors and raw sexuality. And he put off so much heat that Hunter was starting to sweat. The worst part was that Hunter could feel himself getting hard.

  What the fuck is going on? he silently asked his dick.

  His dick’s only response was to become a full-fledged erection, and soon, Hunter had to adjust himself in his pants. Why in the hell was he getting turned on now? This was not the time or the place.

  Thankfully, no one, not even Quentin, seemed to notice, as their attention was focused on Dante, Vance, and Damien in the front of the room.

  “So, we are going to start placing assignments. We have the city marked off in sections,” Vance said. “We’re going to have you pair up, and we’ll get to that in a minute. First, because of the threats to our communities, we’ve decided that our mates need protection, especially when some of them are in a delicate position. Vaughn will stay with Naya, of course, since he will already be home with the babies. My mate and my daughter will stay with me, freeing up Damien to go on patrol. That leaves Kenzie, and she will be assigned to Phoenix and Sawyer, of course. The two of you can decide your schedules.”

  Phoenix was only a few people away from Hunter, so he heard her gasp. He leaned
forward to get a look at her face. She looked pissed, but she didn’t utter a word. Hunter wondered what Dante thought of her assignment and if he wanted to be with her. On their last job, Hunter had been paired with Dante, and he’d been the one to help Dante rescue Phoenix.

  Hunter’s mind had wandered so much that he missed the rest of the assignments, but since Phoenix was with Kenzie, he figured he was with Dante again. Due to the overcrowding, Hunter decided to wait for some of them to leave the room before he went and spoke with Dante. He didn’t get far though.

  “Looks like you and I are together,” a deep baritone said beside him.

  Hunter’s head whipped around to look at Quentin. “Huh?”

  “You and I are together.”

  Others were leaving the room, yet it seemed as if it were getting smaller.

  “I’m sorry. I missed that.”

  Quentin smiled at Hunter like the vampire was a simpleton and needed an extra explanation. “You”—he pointed to Hunter—“and me”—he pointed to himself—“are assigned to patrol together.” He held out his hand. “I’m Quentin. We weren’t formally introduced.”

  Hunter, still in a daze, raised his hand for Quentin to shake. As their skin touched, Hunter felt like a spark had lit inside his body, traveling all around, bouncing off his bones and organs until it settled in his groin. It was then that Hunter realized he was shaking the shifter’s hand with the same hand he’d adjusted himself with less than fifteen minutes ago.

  Ashamed, Hunter yanked his arm away and out of Quentin’s grip, but it was too late.

  Hunter was hard again.

  Quentin, however, didn’t seem to notice. He looked at Hunter and slowly lowered his own arm. He frowned at Hunter with what looked like hurt and disappointment in his eyes. “Maybe you should go and ask your leader for a new partner,” the wolf said, his voice clipped.

  Hunter was confused. Quentin was obviously mad, but he didn’t understand why. Then, Hunter looked down to where he was clutching the hand he’d used to shake Quentin’s, as if the shifter had the plague.