Intertwined Hearts Series (4 book collection): (Intertwined Hearts, An Exceptional Twist, Tangled Paths & Grafted Vines)

by Kimi Flores

  “Really? So, what did you learn?” He tossed the magazine and it landed with a big slap on the table top.

  “Ummm…basically all that shit I just rambled off to you about this glass of wine.” I laughed, holding my glass up, then took another sip. “And that I’m better off to let my best friend continue to cook for me because his talent exceeds any celebrity chef on some magazine.”

  He narrowed his eyes playfully. “Nice try, but are you telling me you haven’t learned anything about wine from me? You had to read it in a magazine?”

  “No, I’ve learned a lot from you, too, but the article kind of reiterated what you’ve said, and don’t forget I did just give you a compliment,” I reminded him, narrowing my eyes right back at him.

  “The article about Nat?” Recognition flashed in his eyes, and I had a feeling I was in trouble. “Wait a minute.” He picked it up again and flipped the pages until he found the editorial spread. “That was his recipe for herb gnocchi you made for dinner last night? Which, I might add, just denounces the ‘save your ass’ compliment.”

  I began twirling a piece of my hair around my finger and did my best impression of the innocent charmer that I often see coming onto him in the tasting room. I knew it bugged him. “Maybe.”

  He pulled my hand away, letting me know he was aware of what I was doing. “All this time I thought you were an amazing cook, and you were just ripping off another man’s recipes,” he joked. “Now I know what deceit tastes like.”

  I smacked his leg, but let my fingers linger a second to feel the warmth beneath his jeans. “Hey, I am a good cook. Remember that albondigas soup I made last week? And the zucchini fritters, the beef and black bean stew? Those were all mine. Oh, and the asparagus, cream cheese rice—wait, no that was my abuelita's. Anyway, I have plenty of my own recipes, thank you very much, mister culinary master.”

  I raised my chin in faux indignation, and he just laughed at me. I loved this playful side of our relationship. We could sit and joke like this the entire night.

  Tossing the magazine back on the table, he went back sipping from his wine. When he placed his hand on top of my thigh, I almost jumped. I’d just done a similar thing to him, but he hadn’t responded. The warmth of his palm lit a fuse inside of me.

  My nerves had woken from their long sleep. They knew what it was like to be sent into ecstasy from his mere touch. I took a long sip from my glass, but all that did was warm my entire body. Holy shit, I was getting carried away.

  His eyes became tender, switching the mood. “Dani, I can’t thank you enough for everything you do for Dad and me. Those new nighttime meds and the essential oil diffuser in his room are working like a charm. I can’t believe how much sleep we’re both getting.”

  And, now my heart was added to the whole mix. This poor guy was still trying to work everything out, and here I was, ready to climb on his lap just because he touched me.

  Refocus, Dani.

  I glanced at the audio monitor next to the TV. The base was in Joel’s room, and he wasn’t making a peep. Depending on which days I worked, Zachary and I took turns with the receiver.

  Zachary picked up his hand and draped his arm across the top of the couch. His fingertips caressed my cheeks as he asked, “We haven't really talked about what’s going on with you.” He glanced around. “It looks like you’ve settled in, but how are you doing?”

  I relaxed further into the couch. It was so nice to be this comfortable with him again. And I loved when he touched me while we talked. I just had to remember that it wasn’t leading anywhere intimate.

  “For the most part, everything’s going well.” I bit the side of my lip and lowered my head a little. There was one thing I’d avoided talking about because of everything that was going on with Joel. I know we’d encouraged each other to be open, but this was not the time to bring it up.

  He frowned at me, instantly noticing my slip. “Hey, why did you just shut down?”

  I shook my head. “It’s nothing. My mind is just running a million miles an hour.”

  He didn’t look convinced. “Dani, you can talk to me about your dad, if that’s what's going on.”

  “What?” I blinked, scared of the immediate emotion that brought. “Why did you bring that up?”

  “I talked to Leah the other day, and she wondered how you were doing. She mentioned it was your dad’s anniversary on Tuesday and it’s a tough time of year for you. You don’t have to keep your feelings from me.” I melted at the compassion he showed me with his eyes. “Remember, we are focusing on the quality of Dad’s life, not on what’s to come in the future.”

  I felt all the tension leave my muscles, and I wanted to just crawl into a ball, covered with the most comfortable blanket. I pulled my legs up, tucking them under my body in an attempt to capture some of that feeling. “I normally try to think about all the good times we had, but lately all my thoughts of him have been about the actual day of his death. It was a bad time all around.”

  His voice was soft. “Tell me about it.” The warmth in his eyes wordlessly told me he really did want to know. And that he wanted to be here for me. I couldn’t remember ever going into the details with him before.

  Trying to blink back my emotions, I looked down at the space between us on the couch. “It was a really tough time in my life, even before Dad died. I was a teenager, making stupid mistakes and paying the consequences.”

  Zachary swiped my hair off my shoulder and rubbed his thumb gently up and down the side of my neck.

  I grimaced a little. “Part of this is an embarrassing story, but I’ll tell you anyway. You see, fifteen-year-old me thought it would be a good idea to follow our star quarterback behind the bleachers after school one day and, let's just say, I willingly handed over my V-card. Matt had been flirting with me for weeks. And since he was the school's golden child, he got away with everything. He’d sneak us off-campus so we could secretly make-out in his car. He said he didn't want anyone to see us because I was special and if all the guys knew he wanted me, then they’d be after me, too.”

  I shook my head at how stupid I’d been. “There was nothing sweet or special about it, just wham bam, thank you ma’am, except he didn’t even bother to thank me. I was so disappointed and still fixing my clothes after he was done, when his friends came barreling out from behind the concession stand, cackling like a pack of hyenas. They were high-fiving Matt, shouting that they couldn’t believe he’d actually went through with the bet.”

  My chest tightened as I remembered the humiliation like it was yesterday. “I stood there, staring at Matt, trying to make sense of what was going on. His buddy clued me in that my father had busted them for underage drinking the month before. Apparently, Matt had drawn the short straw, so he was the lucky bastard who got revenge by nailing ‘that pig’s’ fat, virgin daughter.”

  Zachary’s tender touch never stopped or changed in its rhythm, but he turned his head and stared out in space behind me. His jaw that had once been set while I was telling him my story had begun to flex back and forth.

  I’d seen him do that other times when he was trying to tamp down his anger. It touched me that he never took the physical contact from me and was working to restrain his temper because I had been hurt.

  Blinking back my tears, I kept going. “They harassed and groped me that entire week. I didn’t let them see me crumble once. I’d wait until I was in bed at night to cry. Leah and I shared a bedroom, and she was the only other person who knew what I was going through. She’d beg me to talk to someone about it, but who was I going to talk to?” I held myself with my crossed arms, remembering that it sometimes helped keep me grounded in the present.

  “Like I said, he was the golden child so school officials would’ve swept it under the rug and somehow blamed me. And there was no way in hell I was going to tell my parents. Not only would they be disappointed in me, because I let Matt screw me that day, but I knew my dad would feel guilty. It wasn't his fault, and there was no way I
’d let him take responsibility when all he’d done was his job. Besides, how do you tell your parents that their daughter was seen as a bet and a fat pig? No thanks, I had enough shame. I didn’t need the added consequence of breaking their hearts, too.”

  Blinking hard, Zachary shook his head as though he was trying to comprehend my story. “I don’t understand why anyone would say that about you. Kids are cruel and grab onto the stupidest shit just to feel better about themselves, but it still doesn't make sense.”

  I gave him a sad smile. “Well, let me explain how things were.” With my fist in the air, I slowly unfurled a finger at a time as I made my points. “I was not rich, sporty, a cheerleader, or in the popular crowd. Two, although I had a ‘pretty face’, I was overweight. Three, I was a cop’s kid, which meant I was the target for every bad choice they made and was caught doing the most popular guy in school. Four—”

  Zachary folded his hand over mine and kissed my wrist. “Most of that is not accurate, but I get it, Dani.”

  I’d worked myself up into a frenzy with my hand PowerPoint presentation and had to reel in my feelings. I didn’t want to rush through the rest of the story just because I’d become so flustered. “The day my father passed, I was walking home from school when the truck full of guys drove up next to me, catcalling and making derogatory comments loud enough for all the neighbors to hear. I did my best to ignore them, but there was only so much I could take.

  “Thankfully, my next door neighbor’s older brother drove up behind them and started honking for them to move along. He had no idea what was going on, but I could’ve kissed him for doing that.

  “When I finally got into the house, I dropped my backpack by the couch as my father came into the dining room, wearing an apron with his favorite soccer team’s logo. His face always lit up when he greeted us.”

  My gaze was unfocused, off into the distance, as I remembered that last time I got to see Papi alive.

  “Once I saw him and smelled what he was cooking, my mood lifted.” My mind went back in time, remembering how much I had loved the food he prepared. It brought me a sense of comfort, and I’d been looking for that same satisfaction in every meal since, never quite finding it. “Dad was Salvadorian, and whenever he had time before work, he’d make us traditional pupusas.”

  He smiled with recognition. “Oh I’ve had those, they’re delicious.”

  “Yeah, and Dad made the best ones.” I smiled, too. “The thickness of the corn masa was just right and he balanced the bean and cheese filling perfectly.” My mouth was salivating just thinking about the flavor I’d never taste again.

  “Anyway, once Dad was ready to leave and had said his goodbyes to us girls, I watched him kiss my mom on his way out the door for work. It was their last kiss. That image has forever been burned into my head. She was in her nurse scrubs and he was wearing his uniform, and after twenty years of marriage, they were still so madly in love.

  “My sisters and I were sitting in front of the TV, watching that nineties show, Freaks and Geeks, while doing our homework when the news broke through. The reporter was talking about a domestic disturbance that took place at a home a few blocks away from us. The suspect killed himself, but not before he took out one of the officers.”

  I curled myself into the tightest ball my body would allow as the next part of this story came back, in second-by-second freeze frame. I wasn’t even aware that I had started to rock back and forth till I felt the sofa cushion shift with Zachary’s body weight positioning himself closer to me.

  “Leah ran to the television and turned it up while she screamed for our mother to come into the room. I was frozen, with my pencil still in my hand, as if any minute I was ready to write out the rest of my assignment. Our mother made her way into the room and saw the news report. They weren’t releasing the name of the officer till his family had been notified.”

  I reached for my glass of wine, grasping it with my shaky hand, some of the wine sloshing out. I cursed under my breath at my frailty, but Zach took the glass and put it back on the table. He wiped my knuckle with his finger and drew my hand to his chest. No words were needed. He was allowing me to see that he had me if I fell.

  Staring out into space in front of me, I began to lose myself to my emotions. “I ran to the door, swung it open, and rushed out to the front yard. Looking right and left, I didn’t see any cop car on the road. I said a thank you to God because, if it had been my dad, they would’ve already been there to notify us. I ran back inside to tell my mom and sisters we didn’t have to worry.

  “That damn door hadn’t been shut two minutes—” Heavy sobs broke through my chest and up my throat. “There was a knock at our front door, and we just couldn’t move. Mom finally stepped around me and opened up to find Dad’s partner, Sal standing there, staring at her with red, blood-shot eyes. My mom collapsed in his arms and that was all the confirmation we needed.”

  At some point during my breakdown, Zachary had lifted me into his lap. I’d been dreaming of being there for entirely different reasons so many times but the compassion he showed me filled the never ending void that I had been trying to ignore.

  In the past, I’d look for acceptance between the sheets of a guy’s bed, but I’d take this form of consolation over the empty, worthless feelings that would overtake me after all was said and done.

  His embrace and the cocoon he had created for me was healing. The relief began in my chest, gradually flowing through me till I stopped fighting it. I finally realized I didn’t need to be strong. Being in his arms was the safest I’d felt since before that knock on the door.

  He reached for a tissue on the side table and dabbed my eyes as I sniffed. “It happened almost twenty years ago, but I’ll never forget what it felt like the moment I knew he was gone. Losing a parent is one of the most difficult things to live through. It still breaks my heart to think about.”

  He was quiet for a moment as he stared into my glossy eyes. He’d said I could unload this in front of him, but now I was second guessing being so honest. His father had to be on the forefront of his mind after my emotional dump.

  “Hey, what’s going on in your head?” He must’ve felt the change in my body language, but I imagined he was also diverting to my feelings so we didn’t have to talk about what he was thinking.

  “Sorry.” I shook my head. “The wine’s beginning to take effect.” I climbed off his lap and relaxed into my seat.

  “That’s okay, I should get going anyway.” He gave me a questioning look. “That is, if you’re okay.”

  I patted his thigh, making sure not to grope him like I’d done earlier. “Yeah. Thanks for hearing me out. I haven’t talked about that in a long time.”

  “You know I’m here to listen to anything that’s on your mind.” The sincerity in his tone made me want to climb back into his lap.

  Instead, I ran my hand up and down his back. “Same goes for you.”

  We stood and started to head for the door. I slipped my hands into my back pockets as he turned around and placed a quick kiss on my forehead. “Do me a favor and leave Tuesday open. I want to take you someplace.”

  “Okay.” I nodded, bummed to see him go.

  Once he left, I leaned against the door and let out the breath I had been holding. I felt so much relief and healing from talking about my dad, but I couldn’t help feeling sad that Zachary couldn’t see how great we would be together. How could something that felt so right not work? We could practically read each other's minds.

  Living so close to him was definitely more difficult than I’d first thought it would be. But this was the most I would get from him, and as hard as that was to accept, I had to learn to live with it.

  Chapter Eleven

  Zachary

  Dust kicked up from the car in front of us as we traveled down the dirt road. I’d have to scrub my truck after this, but that didn’t matter. I couldn’t wait to surprise Dani today. We were both in serious need of an escape.

 
As we drove down the rough road, I patted her hand. “How are you over there?”

  She looked lost in thought, staring out the passenger window. I couldn’t blame her. The view of the Los Padres National Forest was amazing.

  “Doing good,” she said softly. “This place is beautiful. I can't believe I’ve never heard of it before.”

  “Dad used to bring Josh and me here when we were teens.”

  I smothered a smile as she sat up and began really taking in the scenery. I gave myself a mental fist bump for sharing a private part of my happy memories with her.

  I hadn’t fully recovered yet from the night in her villa when she’d shared the story about her dad and those fuckers from high school. The list of assholes I’d love to beat the shit out of for hurting her seemed to be growing longer every day. What the hell was wrong with those guys and why had they targeted her?

  After I’d gotten home and checked on Dad that night, I’d taken a shower. Usually after spending time with her, I’d let the cold water wash over me to tame my hunger for her, but that night I used the sound of the heavy drops hitting my skin and the tile below my feet to mask my own tears. I’d felt her pain so deeply when she’d been curled on my lap, encased by my arms. The need to protect her was overwhelming.

  Mixed in were my own fears about how my life would be forever changed when it was Dad’s turn to leave. There was still plenty of time to enjoy him, though, so after I was done in the shower, I chose to push those thoughts aside.

  But for days, I couldn’t shake what Dani had shared with me. My mind had pondered what I would’ve done if I’d known her back then. Would we have even been friends in school? Would her parents have allowed it since my mother was a frequent flyer at the local jail, visiting the flavor of the month?

  With those thoughts still on my mind while I’d been alone in the wine tasting room yesterday, my hand had reached out to a cabinet door and opened it with a fury that was only matched with the slam I used to close it again. Over and over I repeated it, as many times as I had cursed the people who had let my Dani down. And I did not want to be added to her list.