Locked Down
Page 25
Though Foley had told him there was a spot on the team—indeed, he would pretty much be the lead analyst on the case—he’d politely declined the offer and informed Foley of his plans to move on elsewhere. His boss had said he’d be sad to see him go, but would see what strings he could pull on Gabe’s behalf for a position in the San Francisco office when he’d named the city as his preference.
Though he was a little disappointed he wouldn’t get to see through what had turned out to be a huge case, in a city the size of San Francisco, there were sure to be interesting things unfolding, and with Foley’s recommendation, he’d be more likely to land himself a sweet spot in the San Francisco office. Besides, it was his job, not his entire life. Yeah, what he did was important, and his career meant a lot to him. But none of it would be worth a damn if he didn’t have some kind of balance. If he didn’t have a life outside of the office.
And the idea of starting fresh in a new city, of Matt being there to come home to every night, seemed like a dream he’d never dared hope for, especially not after the way his past few relationships had ended.
“Wow, that was some crowd.”
Gabe glanced up to see Matt stepping through the doorway of his room, where the last of the agents had just exited a few seconds ago.
Matt had barely left his side in the past few days. Even though the doctors had declared his injury serious but not life-threatening, Matt had still stuck to him like glue. He’d only left a couple of times to go back to the motel for a shower and change of clothing.
“That was the team who are taking over the ALP investigation,” he replied as Matt stopped next to his bed and leaned down to kiss him.
“How are you?” Matt murmured against his lips, brushing light fingers down the side of his face.
“Fine. Just like the last dozen times you asked me.” He injected a note of exasperation to the words, but truthfully, he was enjoying the way Matt fussed and doted over him. “And just like the last dozen times, I’ll tell you again that you don’t need to worry.”
“Then I guess I should tell you again that I’m not getting over it anytime soon since you were shot and I had to watch you lie there, bleeding all over the place and not breathing properly.” Matt hopped up onto the side of the bed, so Gabe scooted over to make room for him. Their arms settled around each another, automatically falling into the position they’d spent most of their time in, despite one of the nurses who constantly tried to shoo Matt out of his bed to make sure he was resting properly. Truthfully, he rested far better with Matt to snuggle, rather than when he was alone.
They’d already had this same conversation about what happened in the diner countless times, and he got the feeling they were going to keep having it for a while yet to come. Not that he could blame Matt for being a little stuck on the whole shooting thing. He’d taken it a helluva lot better than Gabe himself probably would have if their positions had been reversed. He didn’t know what he would have done if Matt had been the one seriously injured. He definitely wouldn’t have held it together the whole time as calmly as Matt had.
“Guess what the nurses said?” Matt prodded him gently in the side.
“That they’re going to find me a hot male nurse to give me a sponge bath?” He yelped when Matt nudged him a little more sharply the second time.
Matt shifted so he could look up at him with a slight frown. “Only I’m allowed to give you a sponge bath.”
“Is that a promise?” he drawled lazily, smoothing his hands up Matt’s sides and imagining all sorts of fun they could have with a soapy sponge between them and very few items of clothes.
“Only if you behave yourself,” Matt replied with a completely straight face, which Gabe never would have been able to pull off. “Seriously, though. The nurses said you could be discharged tomorrow, as long as you take it easy.”
“Take it easy like you’re on top?” he teased. “I get to lie back and let you do all the hard work?”
Matt rolled his eyes, but an adorable flush of color bloomed over his cheeks. “I really doubt that’s what they meant.”
“Pity,” he murmured, enjoying the way Matt shifted against him, as if maybe he was imaging exactly what Gabe had suggested.
“It means I’m going to do all the driving to San Francisco.” Though Matt’s words were determined, there was a hint of vulnerability in his gaze, like he was still fighting a shadow of doubt over whether going with him was what Gabe wanted. Whether it was really going to happen. They’d decided the day before to take Gabe’s car and do the cross-country drive.
“We break every four hours.” He pointed an admonishing finger at Matt. “And we only drive between 9:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m., no early starts or staying on the road until all hours of the night.”
“But that’ll add an extra—” Matt’s mind seemed to finally catch up and he snapped his mouth closed as his eyes darkened. “If we’re going to spend all the other hours in bed, then that’s fine with me.”
He grinned and drew Matt in closer. “Glad we’re on the same page.”
Gabe sealed their mouths together, immediately groaning as sensation swamped him, need sparking to instant life within him. Though his chest still pulled with a twinging ache when he moved the wrong way and he knew he wasn’t exactly up to any gymnastic feats of sexual prowess, the lack of privacy in his hospital room had really started getting on his nerves. Because he was sure there were plenty of other things he could get up to with Matt that’d take the edge off and not tax his healing body. But every time he started thinking maybe they could get away with a quick—
Someone clearing their throat had him and Matt reluctantly pulling apart.
Exactly what he was talking about. A nurse bustled over to check his vitals and make some notes on his chart, looking as exasperated as he felt. It wasn’t the first time she’d walked in on the two of them kissing. In fact, yesterday he’d had his hand jammed down the front of Matt’s pants and been doing his damnedest to make him come quick and dirty.
“The doctor will be in to see you shortly,” the nurse warned once she was done, probably because she guessed they were going to pick right up where they’d left off when she stepped out of the room. And she would have been right. “He’ll explain everything you can and can’t do if you want to be discharged tomorrow.”
She raised an eyebrow and looked pointedly at where his hand had been straying precariously close to Matt’s ass. He only laughed, while Matt blushed adorably and shook his head at him.
After she left again, Matt settled down to rest his cheek on the noninjured side of Gabe’s chest. Gabe wound his arms more tightly around him, content just to lie there and hold him for the time being.
“He’s asking to see me,” Matt said into the silence a few moments later. Gabe blinked, realizing he’d almost fallen into a doze. It took his brain a few seconds to piece together what Matt had said.
“Who, Thomas?”
Matt nodded against his chest but didn’t say anything, simply tightened his hold.
“Do you want to see him?”
“I don’t think it’s about whether or not I want to. I think it’s more about whether or not I should,” Matt replied slowly, as if considering his words carefully.
“What do you mean?”
“If it was about whether I wanted to see him, then the answer would be no. Hell no. I don’t understand why he did it all and I don’t want to hear his excuses. Worse, what if he’s not even sorry?” Matt sighed, pressing his face more fully into Gabe’s chest, seeking comfort as they both had with each other over the past few days since the shooting.
“But?” he prompted when Matt stayed silent for a few long moments.
“But I keep thinking of Aunt Katie. She’s going to have questions that I can’t answer.”
“They still don’t know?” With everything going on, he truthfully hadn’t given Matt’s family much thought.
“They know. It made the national news. His name was all over the repor
ts. I called them while you were in surgery that first day. They were devastated. I only told them the basic facts, and I was speaking directly to my mom. I haven’t actually spoken to Aunt Katie, and honestly, I’m not looking forward to it.”
Gabe shifted so he could lift Matt’s face to see his blue eyes. “None of this is your fault, Matt. And they won’t think so either.”
“It doesn’t feel that way,” Matt muttered, shadows in his gaze that hadn’t been there before. Shadows Gabe knew would never quite leave him. Not after what he’d experienced since he set foot in Everness. At the hands of his own cousin, no less. “I just keep thinking maybe if I had—”
“No.” He smothered whatever else Matt was going to say with a determined kiss. “I’m not going to let you punish yourself over this. Thomas is a grownass man who made his own bad choices. You did everything you could to help him. You gave him more chances than most people would have. If he couldn’t see that, if he couldn’t get his head out of his own ass, then that is 100 percent not your fault.”
“But—”
Gabe interrupted him yet again by sealing his mouth over his until Matt melted against him.
“Every time you try to blame yourself for something that isn’t your fault, I’m just going to kiss you until you shut up.”
Matt grinned at him, not seeming perturbed by the idea in the least. “Then you’re going to spend an awful lot of time kissing me.”
“I can live with that,” he murmured in return, running his fingers lightly through Matt’s dark hair. “Do you want me to come when you go to see him?”
Matt nodded, expression sobering once again. “I need you there, Gabe.”
“Then I’ll be there. Always.”
“Always,” Matt repeated, a hint of wonder in his voice that warmed every inch of Gabe’s body. Who would have ever guessed he’d get so much pleasure from making another person happy? And if he really got to spend the rest of his life making Matt happy, he’d consider himself a lucky man.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
MATT TIGHTENED his hold on Gabe’s hand as the corrections officer held the door open for them. He stepped through into the windowless room, where another officer stood in the far corner while Thomas sat handcuffed to a table that was bolted to the floor.
The prison Thomas was being held in until his trial—since the judge hadn’t allowed him to post bail—wasn’t maximum security, but since Matt had never been anywhere near a prison before, let alone inside one, everything seemed austere and intimidating.
Thomas was pale, the orange jumpsuit not exactly helping matters. Aunt Katie had been in to see her son after arriving earlier in the day, but by her accounts he hadn’t said much. She planned on staying in Texas indefinitely, waiting to hear the outcome of the trial before she decided what she was going to do—stay in Texas to be close to Thomas even if he was going to spend years in jail, or head back to San Francisco and travel back and forth for visits. What no one really wanted to discuss was the possibility of Thomas facing the death penalty, though the lawyer thought it was unlikely considering Thomas hadn’t actually killed anyone.
Matt and Gabe took the two seats on the opposite side of the table from Thomas, who cast a quick look between the two of them, but interestingly enough, didn’t seem disgusted or angry as he had the previous few times he’d seen them together.
“You asked to see me?” Matt prompted when Thomas didn’t say anything right away.
Thomas shifted, making the cuffs rattle against the metal bar they were attached to in the middle of the table.
“Why did you do it?”
“What?” he replied, completely stumped. Whatever Matt had been expecting Thomas to say, that definitely hadn’t been it. Actually, it was closer to what Matt had wanted to say himself.
“When you grabbed me, stopped me from shooting anyone. From killing him.” He paused to nod at Gabe, his cousin’s expression strangely devoid of emotion. “Why did you do it? You knew you were putting yourself in danger. You could have easily been killed, either by me or SWAT when they came in. Why would you do that?”
Suddenly, all the rage and hurt that’d still been dwelling deep within him over what Thomas had done melted away to be replaced by sadness and pity.
“If I have to explain it to you, then you’ll never get it. Not really.”
Thomas leaned forward, a gleam in his eye that was almost fanatical. “Try me.”
Matt glanced at Gabe, who nodded slightly, giving him the silent support he needed.
“Because you’re my family,” he finally replied, turning his attention back to his cousin. “You’re the closest thing I have to a brother, and even if none of that mattered, I love Aunt Katie and I didn’t want to see her get hurt.”
Thomas studied him for a long moment before his features twisted into a scowl. “You’re an idiot.”
“Excuse me?” Gabe demanded, half rising from his chair.
Matt set a hand on his arm and urged him back down again.
“He saved your life, moron,” Gabe said once he was seated again. “If Matt hadn’t stopped you, when the SWAT guys breached and you refused to put down the weapon, they would have killed you.”
“Who says I didn’t want them to?” Thomas asked quietly, gaze cutting away from them.
Matt didn’t think anything else his cousin could say or do would shock him, but that did.
“You wanted to die?” Gabe clarified, since Matt couldn’t find any words. “Suicide by cop shooting, is that how you planned that day to play out?”
Thomas didn’t answer and now refused to look at them, his jaw clenched, the muscle standing out in his cheek.
Well, that certainly painted the whole event in a different light. Thomas had apparently been planning to die and probably hadn’t cared who else he took with him. And none of this gave Matt any clear answers about what the hell his cousin had been thinking, what had driven him to do it. Instead he only had more questions. Too many questions. But one burned hotter than all the rest.
“What happened to you, Thomas?”
The quiet words brought his cousin’s attention back to him at last, and for a second, Matt swore he glimpsed the boy he’d been when Auntie Katie had first moved in with him and his mom.
“Honestly, Matt. I don’t know.”
Before Matt could work out what to say in return, Thomas motioned to the guard, signaling he was ready to leave. Matt felt numb as he watched the corrections officer escort his cousin out of the room, chains between his feet limiting his steps.
“Are you okay?” Gabe asked, sliding an arm around his shoulder.
“I’m really ready to get out of here. Out of this place. Out of Texas altogether.”
Gabe leaned over and pressed a lingering kiss to his temple, holding him close and tight for a few long moments—exactly what he needed.
“Let’s get you home,” Gabe murmured, and Matt couldn’t ever remember hearing anything better. “Remember my road trip rules?”
Matt sat back and landed a wide grin on Gabe, looking forward to the trip back to San Francisco more than was probably sensible.
“At least eight hours of sex in a different motel room every night,” he answered, letting his grin turn sly.
“That is not what I said,” Gabe announced, but then he leaned in closer. “But I’m definitely not going to argue.”
Matt got to his feet, holding out a hand to pull Gabe up. Neither of them said anything as they left the room and then made their way out into the late-afternoon sunshine.
He hadn’t gotten any answers about why Thomas had done all the things he had, but Matt could accept that nothing he could have said or done would’ve made a difference. He’d wanted to help his cousin, and he hoped he had by saving his life, even if Thomas hadn’t wanted to be saved.
Even though it’d only been two weeks since he’d left San Francisco, it felt more like years. Like he’d changed in ways he could never have imagined, both good and bad.
EPILOGUE
One Year Later
“I CAN’T believe I let you talk me into this.” Matt eyed the same headache-inducing floral bedspread, the same matching curtains, the same wood paneling and laminate table that all looked exactly the same as it had last time he’d stayed in the motel a year ago.
“We should make it a yearly trip.” Gabe went over and flopped onto the bed before rolling on his side and patting the mattress invitingly. “Come on. It’s just as lumpy as I remember.”
“You know we could have taken Danny and Jake up on the invitation to stay with them.”
Gabe arched an eyebrow at him. “And have to put my hand over your mouth every time we have sex so they don’t hear you—”
“Okay, okay!” He held both hands up in surrender to stop Gabe finishing the sentence. He could feel his face getting red all the way to the tips of his ears and knew he must have been blushing something fierce. Even after a year, Gabe still had the ability to make him go bright red with a few well-chosen words. “Don’t get comfortable. We’re due to meet Danny and Jake for lunch, remember.”
Gabe huffed a dramatic sigh and rolled off the bed again. “Fine, but later we’re going to make some new lumps in this mattress.”
Matt made a face at him as he finally got upright. “Was that supposed to be romantic? Because ew.”
Gabe only laughed and snagged his hand before tugging him out of the room again.
They got back into the rental car and made the short drive out to Lake Conroe, making jokes and talking in half sentences. Sammie was always teasing them about being an old married couple, but he couldn’t have been more right and Matt loved every second of it.
After going home from Everness last year, he and Gabe had spent a whirlwind few weeks getting to know each other better and seeing all the San Francisco sights, as well as a whole bunch of other Californian touristy things farther afield than his home city. They’d just worked. Easy, simple, and ridiculously giddy. Gabe had quickly secured himself a job at the San Francisco FBI offices, coming with high recommendation from his previous boss, and instead of finding his own place, had moved in with Matt.