He turned back to his sister, and Lorna sank down on a chair. How could she have misjudged Rafael so completely? How could she have been so stupid not to have gone to him with her discovery, not to have asked him for an explanation before jumping to her own conclusions?. With a start she realized he was speaking to her again.
'I think we should drink a toast to you, Miss Fairfax. But for your unquenchable thirst for knowledge and discovery the whole truth might never have been known.'
Dimly she was "aware that the maid had entered with champagne and glasses and she watched as Rafael poured out the sparkling wine and handed each member of the family a glass. When he came to Lorna he stopped.'
'You are astute, Miss Fairfax,' he said icily, 'but in your excitement you forgot that two and two never make five! Next time you should be more careful before condemning a man without a hearing.' He drained his glass and threw the crystal goblet into the empty grate, shattering it into a thousand pieces.'
CHAPTER SIX
Rafael was alone in the library when Lorna knocked on the door later that evening.
'I'd like to talk to you, Rafael.'
'There is nothing for you to say.'
'But there is.' She closed the door and leant against it to hide her trembling. 'I want to explain - to apologize.'
'For calling me a thief or for thinking me one?'
She threw out her hand. 'You're perfectly right to be bitter. I'd feel the same if I were you. But you must understand - must try and imagine how I felt.'
The words rushed out in a torrent, defying him to interrupt as hurriedly, incoherently, she told him everything that had happened. Suddenly there was nothing more to say, and in an agony, of suspense she waited for him to speak.
'I do not blame you,' he said at last. 'You were at perfect liberty to think what you liked. That I thought better of you was my mistake; stupidly I deluded myself into believing that you trusted me.' He moved nearer to his desk and the lamp threw a shadow on the tight line of his mouth. 'A Rodriguez is not used to being suspected. Miss Fairfax. You should know that by this time. Now if you will excuse me, I have some work to do.'
He bent his head over some papers, but she ignored the rebuff and came quickly across the carpet. 'Rafael,' her voice was a mere thread of sound and she coughed ' and began again. 'Rafael, I know you're still angry. Don't deny it, I can see it in your eyes.'
He looked up then, his expression mocking. 'Really, Miss Fairfax, I can assure you I'm not one whit angry with you, only with myself for having thought better of you.'
That's a cruel thing to say! You're angry because I misjudged you, yet that's exactly what you did to
Rosalia.'
'I was entitled to. She is my sister.'
That makes it all the worse!'
'On the contrary! If you had accused me of stealing anything but the ring—' he broke off. 'Diabos! It is unthinkable that you believe me capable of harming my sister.'
'But I fought against it!' she cried. 'I tried with all my heart to believe you innocent, but everything was against you. Even Rosalia made matters worse. Can't you see that?'
'No,' he said coldly. 'You should have come and asked me for the truth.'
'I was afraid.'
'That I would confirm your fears? Or silence them with murder, perhaps?' She caught her breath and he shrugged. "You are transparent, Miss Fairfax, it makes you uninteresting to talk to. Now please go. Believe me, I will only hurt you more if you stay.'
'Is that all you have to say ?'
'Did you expect anything more?'
'No - no, I didn't. Not a thing.' She turned away blindly. 'I'm sorry I bothered you.'
Some fifteen minutes later she entered the lobby of the small pension to find Derek anxiously scanning the door.
'Lorna! I couldn't make out what had happened to you. What's the matter? You look all in.'
'I am. I wouldn't go through the last few hours for anything in the world.'
He drew her to a seat in the corner of the lounge and briefly she told him the news.
'Poor darling,' he said when she had finished, 'I wish I'd been there with you. It must have been awful.'
'It was.'
'Well, it's over now. Have a drink, you'll feel better for it.'
He signalled the waiter and then leaned back and surveyed her. 'So we were proved wrong after all! Somehow I didn't think Rodriguez was a thief.'
'You agreed with me at the time.'
'Because I let my jealousy blind me.' She said nothing, and he continued: 'But what happened when you accused him? I can't imagine him taking it lying down.'
'He didn't. He was furious. Not that I blame him. I was a fool not to have gone to him with the whole story in the first place.'
'It's easy to be wise after the event. At the time you were positive he was guilty. The best thing you can do is to return home with me. If he's going to be unpleasant—'
'There's no fear of that. Rafael's anger will merely take the form of ignoring me.'
'Equally unpleasant.' He leaned across towards her. There's no point in denying it, Lorna, Rodriguez can make it pretty uncomfortable for you, and my opinion is that you should come home. I'm sure Amalia would be the first to agree with me.'
'I've no intention of asking her. Please, Derek, we've gone over all this before.'
'I know, but I've a one-track mind as far as you're concerned, darling. I'm crazy about you — I—'
'Derek, no - not now.'
'Why? The Rodriguez family are nicely settled, or dp you think I'm so stupid I don't know the real reason you keep putting me off? O.K., don't look so miserable, I know when I'm treading on thin ice.' He stood up. 'Come on. We. might as well go to the Casino and try and forget our worries in the mad spin of the ball!'
Her smile was a little wan. 'A good idea. I think my luck might be in tonight!'
Gradually life readjusted itself. Rosalia was woven once more into the family pattern and Rafael's hostile attitude to Lorna resolved itself into an armed neutrality. In an effort to slough the membrance of pain and disillusionment Lorna turned her whole attention to Amalia. As the hot, humid days of 'August gave way to September the position between the young couple deteriorated further, and after a particularly violent quarrel Amalia stormed into her friend's room, hysterically screaming that she would run away the moment the baby was born, a statement which Lorna heartily but silently endorsed.
Yet although she tried to see the humorous side she was forced to admit there was nothing she could do, and she sat one afternoon in the garden turning the problem over in her mind. The grass was brown and withered and the flowers drooped under the white glare that beat down relentlessly from early morning until the quick descent of dusk.
She closed her eyes for a moment and when she woke her throat was parched and dry. Glancing down at her watch, she was startled to see she had slept for several hours. Hurriedly she got to her feet, but the garden began to revolve alarmingly and she steadied herself on the arm of her chair and rubbed her hand across her forehead; it was wet with perspiration. She took a step towards the house and faltered. Dark spots expanded until they seemed to burst in her brain; jagged streaks of light flashed across the horizon and with every step a feeling of nausea grew stronger. She tottered across the lawn to the foot of the terrace, dimly aware of the figure of a man above her.
'What were you doing in the garden, Miss Fairfax?' Rafael spoke curtly. 'I thought I told you not to go out in the sun without a hat.'
'I know. It was stupid of me.' Her tongue was so swollen she could hardly speak. 'I didn't realize it was so strong.'
The sun is always strong in summer. I noticed you on the lawn earlier, but I thought you'd have enough sense to come in.'
'I meant to, but I - I fell asleep - I hadn't realized I was - was there so long.'
Holding tightly to the railing, she climbed the steps, and as she came into focus he noticed her face.
"Diabos, you're like a ghost! What is it? A
re you ill?'
She swayed. 'No - yes, I - I think it's the sun.'
She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came, and silently she crumpled at his feet.
For the next few days Lorna lay in a darkened room unconscious of her surroundings. She was aware only of an unquenchable thirst in a dark sea of pain. Voices soothed but could not placate her and she tossed and turned fretfully, throwing off the covering sheets in an effort to become cool. Gradually the mists receded and she became aware of a white-clad figure moving quietly round the room. She must certainly have been ill to warrant the attention of a nurse! She struggled to speak, but could only manage a faint thread of sound and fell back exhausted on her pillow.
Instantly the nurse was at her side. 'Well, well, so you're conscious! Feeling better?'
'Not much,' Lorna said weakly. 'Can't talk.'
'I'm not surprised. You haven't stopped for the last ten days!'
Ten?'
That's right. Nearly eleven, in fact. You were quite a sick young woman. Which reminds me, it's time for your milk. Do you. want it mixed with Horlicks or Ovaltine or can you drink it straight?'
Lorna endeavoured a smile. 'Straight.' The nurse moved to the door. 'You speak English well,' Lorna whispered after her.
The woman turned and grinned. 'I should do. I was born in Manchester! Senhor Rodriguez thought you'd prefer to have one of your own countrywomen look after you while you were ill. Now, no more talking. Have a little doze while. I get you your drink.'
Obediently Lorna closed her eyes, but her brain was too active for her to sleep. Why had Rafael gone to so much trouble to get her an English nurse? After all that had transpired between them she would have expected him to wash his hands of her completely - yet he had done exactly the opposite! She sighed and turned her head into the pillow. Impossible to try and puzzle out the complexities of Rafael's nature.
It was the end of the week before she was allowed out of bed and propped up in an armchair by the window. Amalia was her first visitor and Lorna was delighted to see her. 'It seems as if I've been in bed a year. A fine one I am - the Very time when you need me most I have to get sunstroke!'
'Never mind.' Gingerly Amalia seated herself on the edge of the bed. 'All's well that ends well. You gave us quite a shock, though. You were terribly ill the first two days.'
It was some time before Lorna recovered her strength. She would never have believed that sunstroke could be so enervating and she could hardly summon enough energy to walk about her room. After another week she was able to dress herself and have her first meal downstairs.
Everyone was in the dining-room to greet her. Manoel and Rafael had come home from Lisbon for the occasion, and Lorna felt absurdly shy as she walked in. She was looking anything but her best. Her hair was lustreless and tied back from her face with a narrow ribbon, her tan had waned and her cheekbones protruded sharply, throwing blue shadows under her eyes. All in all, she thought, a most unprepossessing picture!
The Senhora smiled a welcome from the head of the table. 'It's good to have you with us again, Miss Fairfax.'
With a murmured 'Thank you,' Lorna slipped into a seat beside Rosalia. She was intensely conscious of Rafael's scrutiny, and stubbornly avoided his eyes, concentrating determinedly on the girl by her side.
The meal was a pleasant one. Manoel and Amalia bickered lightly, but no one took any notice; Rosalia attacked her food as if trying to make up for lost time and the Senhora presided graciously over everyone's needs. Only Rafael was the same: cool, polite and heartbreakingly distant.
'You have not eaten much. Miss Fairfax.' It was the Senhora again, her bird-like glance going from Lorna's face to her plate. 'But perhaps it is to be expected. Even now you look far from well. I was saying earlier to Amalia that it might be better if you returned home. A more invigorating climate - your family—'
'Miss Fairfax has no family.' For the first time Rafael spoke.
'She has an aunt,' his mother corrected. 'Apart from which, when one is ill one does not want to be among strangers.'
'After all this time Miss Fairfax; should know us better than to regard us as strangers.' He looked at Lorna. 'Am I not right ?'
She hesitated. 'I'm very happy here, of course, but I know what your mother means. You may be right; senhora. Perhaps it would be best if I leave.'
'You can't leave now.' Amalia put down her knife and fork. "You promised, Lorna!'
'Amalia!' Manoel pleaded. 'Don't get excited.'
'I'm not excited!' his wife cried. 'Can't I say anything without being—'
That's enough!' Rafael was master of the situation. There's no need for argument. Miss Fairfax will remain here. She became ill While in our home and it is only right for her to recover fully before she leaves. Now, Miss
Fairfax, I' suggest a drive in the country after lunch. I have to go to Cintra on business and a change of air will do you good.'
Lorna swallowed hard. 'I - it - it sounds very nice, but I—'
'Good. It's settled.' He pushed back his chair. 'Perhaps we can have coffee immediately, Mother, I would like to leave right away.'
With heightened colour the Senhora rang the bell and the meal* was finished in awkward silence.
Lorna viewed the afternoon ahead of her with something like despair. Desire to be with Rafael fought with fear that she would not be able to bear his proximity. She had no resistance with which to defend herself from his taunts, one jibe and she knew she. would dissolve into tears. Desperately she hoped that Luiz would drive them, but when she went down to the car, Rafael was already at the wheel. The thought of being alone with him all the afternoon was too much for her and she caught at the car door.
'I didn't want to argue with you in front of your family, senhor, but I - don't want to go with you this afternoon. We can have nothing to say to each other and it is stupid to try and pretend to a - a regard that both of us know is false.'
'I know nothing of the kind.' His voice was completely unemotional and he caught her arm and pulled her gently into the car. Unable to argue any longer, she sat in the far corner, her hands trembling so violently that she hid them in the folds of her dress.
There is no need to be afraid, Lorna,' he said quietly. 'Although we always seem to quarrel when we are alone together, this afternoon will be one occasion when we won't. Now don't answer me. Lean your head back against the seat and rest.'
Exhausted from the effort of trying to defy him, Lorna did as she was told and the miles sped by without a word.
Idly she watched the countryside flash past: scraggy trees and undulating fields ready for harvesting.
The town of Cintra was ten miles distant and stood at the base of an immense, rocky crag. A few houses sprawled up the hill, half hidden by elms, walnuts and the rich green of lemon trees. The dusty square was bounded on one side by the Royal Palace - now a museum - and on the other by the Central Hotel, while high above them, against the blue sky, could be glimpsed the magnificent turrets of Pena Palace.
Rafael parked the car and guided her across the square to the small terrace of the Hotel Central. It was full of people, mostly American tourists, and the hot, sultry air was broken by cries of 'Hey, take a look at this', and 'Move outa the way, Mom, I wanna take a movie!'
Lorna caught Rafael's eye and smiled. 'It's strange how a language mirrors the character of its people.'
'Personally I prefer the lilting beauty of French or the passion of Spanish or Portuguese. Even the cold precision Of English is better than that rough camaraderie.' He ordered tea from the waitress and then turned back to her. 'When I think of the different races that inhabit the earth I'm not surprised there are wars.'
'But what's the solution - or isn't there one?'
'There's a solution for everything. It sometimes takes a little while to find one, that's all.' He waved an arm. 'If only the common peoples would intermingle. Then you would find your hope for the future.'
She steeled herself to look directly at the da
rk, tanned face, the thin mouth now relaxed and gentle. In white flannels and shirt he looked alien to the vociferous young men around him in their gaily coloured shirts and wide- brimmed hats.
'I can just see you giving up your nationality and mingling! You're so proud of being Portuguese you wouldn't want to lose one of your characteristics!'
'Not lose them,' he said, 'but subdue them so that they do not grate on other people.'
'They, don't!' The words were out before she could stop them, and she flushed.
'Yet my ardour grated on you,' he said softly. 'You were more used to phlegmatic men like Simmons.'
She put her hands under the table to hide their trembling. 'I was speaking generally. It isn't fair to be personal.'
'I can never be otherwise with you.' He leaned forward and caught her arm. 'Why is it that whenever I want to say anything to you there are so many people around? I am not a patient man, Lorna, I cannot sit here and look at you without letting you see in my eyes exactly what I feel. Querida, querida, we've wasted so much time, there's been so much misunderstanding.'
'It wasn't my fault, Rafael, I knew I was wrong and I apologized.'
'I'm not concerned with the ring,' he said impatiently. 'That's over and done with.'
'I can't forget it,' she said quietly, amazed that he could dismiss so lightly something that had given her infinite pain. 'You were cruel, Rafael, cruel and hurtful.'
'Because I loved you. You know that, you're not blind.'
She stared at him incredulously, unable to believe he had spoken words she had never thought to hear from him. The noise of the people around seemed to diminish; the brilliant light grew dark and then returned with such force that she clung to the edge of the table, her face waxy pale.
Instantly Rafael was on his feet, his arm around her waist. 'What a fool I am! Your first day out and I upset you. My poor darling.' Murmuring softly in Portuguese, he half led, half carried her to the car and settled her in the seat, then slid in beside her and headed towards Estoril.
Rachel Lindsay - Alien Corn Page 9
