Unbroken (Fighter MMA Romance)

by Valentine, Sienna

  Joel realized his hands were back into tight balls, pressed against his hips. The blood in his veins raced through him, pulling tension and fury to each of his extremities. He still had no idea why this news filled him with so much rage. Unable to determine the true source, he finally settled on focusing on Amber's betrayal as a surrogate.

  "You had no right to invade my privacy," he said through his teeth. His past was his and his alone. He wasn't proud of it, and he never chose to share any more of it than he had to with anyone. The fact that Amber and some stranger had dug around in some computer looking up details of his life filled him with apprehension. His parents had never had any sort of computer growing up, and his school only had them in the library. Shelters were more concerned with food and beds than technology. Computers were an unknown entity to him. He hadn't ever imagined they could also be used to delve into his personal history and spill his secrets.

  "Joel, I'm so sorry about your father..."

  "Are you kidding me?" he asked, his rage flaring out as he sneered at her. "You think I give two shits that that sick fuck is dead? Didn't your fucking computer tell you how Darryl used to beat the shit out of my mother and me? Didn't it tell you how they kicked me out as soon as I was 18 with just the clothes on my back, happy to finally get rid of me?"

  "No!" Amber cried out. "Joel, I'm sorry. I had no idea. We just saw the news about your parents and I thought you should know."

  Joel felt his face get hot as he realized it was his own admission now that was revealing the shame of his past, but he pushed past it. Amber needed to hear these things, needed to know that he was unlovable, even to his parents. She was too good a person to get wrapped up in his life.

  "Well, now you know. I learned to fight because of him. I learned how to take a punch, and how to deal with pain. Maybe I at least have that to thank him for. He also taught me that no one can be trusted." He glared in Amber's direction. "That's one lesson I should have paid more attention to."

  "Joel-"

  "I don't want to hear it!" he growled. The look on his face made Amber take a step back, causing an instant blast of remorse to well up in his stomach. He swallowed that feeling back as well. "Coming back here was a mistake," he said, a bit softer this time. He shook his head as he looked around the little apartment, purposely avoiding eye contact with Amber. If he saw her tears, he might soften the decisions that were forming in his mind.

  This was no place for him. Amber was too naive. They had nothing in common. She didn't get him, and she never would. He'd been alone for years, and that's the way he needed to stay. Otherwise someone would get hurt. And he cared too much about Amber to let that someone be her.

  "I don't know if this relationship is the best idea," he said. He stared at the floor between them as he spoke.

  "What do you mean?" Amber's voice was quivering.

  "I'm worried you're going to get hurt."

  "Don't you think that risk is mine to take?" she replied, her voice taking on a more defiant tone.

  He lifted his eyes from the floor to meet her gaze. She was glaring at him, her eyes red from alcohol and tears.

  "Are you worried about me, or yourself?" she asked.

  He frowned at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

  "You're Mr. Fight Club," she said, borrowing Simon's nickname. "You can take a punch or get your head slammed into a brick wall and shrug everything off. But when it comes time to stick your neck out emotionally, you run away scared. Every fucking time."

  "That's bullshit. I just don't want to feel responsible when this whole relationship comes crashing down. Because it will. That's what always happens."

  "Blah, blah. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Joel," she said. She put a hand on her hip and was leaning forward but he noticed her other hand holding onto the couch to keep her steady. "You've had a hard life. I get it. Your parents were assholes, I get it. But when are you going to stop using that as an excuse to keep from getting on with your life? Stop living under the shadow of your past!"

  "You don't know anything about me," he spat.

  "I know!" she said, her voice rising an octave as she practically shook. "Because you won't fucking tell me anything! So yes, I had to go look it up for myself. Forgive me for giving a shit about my boyfriend and wanting to know more about him!"

  Boyfriend? That wasn't something they had discussed, and he could see in her eyes as she said it that it was a slip of the tongue. But she didn't pause for long.

  "I'm just saying, when two people are together they share things about their lives, Joel. You know way more about me than I know about you. Like the fact that I dream of being a nurse, but probably never will because I'll never be able to afford it working at a shitty bar job. Hell, I can't even afford a stethoscope. But at least I've told you my dreams. I've told you things about me that I've never told anyone. What have you told me, Joel? That your parents died a long time ago? I thought that was something. Turns out that was just a lie so that you wouldn't have to open up about them.

  "So go ahead," she turned her body, moving herself out from between him and the door. "There's the door. Run away like you always do. Just don't expect that I'm going to be here every time to take you back. I'm getting tired of this shit. I want a commitment, Joel. I want some stability. And I think that would help you, too."

  His eyes met hers and the two of them stared in silence at each other. "Fine," he said. Breaking their visual standoff, he walked past her without another glance and left.

  She doesn't know what the fuck she's talking about anyway.

  Amber

  The sun streaming in from between the blinds sliced through Amber's eyelids and drilled into her brain, making it feel like it was splitting in half. With one heavy arm, she pulled her bed sheet over her head in an effort to shield herself, but the pain lessened only slightly.

  What the fuck?

  It took her longer than it should have to remember that she was hung over and not, in fact, in the middle of a brain aneurysm. Slowly, as she lay hidden in the humidity under the thin layer of cotton, the events of the night before began to seep back into her mind like a slow IV drip. Thoughts of Simon and drinking came first. Something about Karaoke. Waking up in a cab.

  Joel.

  The pounding of her chest grew as the details of their fight flooded back, the drip now becoming a torrent. He had come back to apologize and somehow she had let her little covert op with Simon slip out. And then she'd called him her boyfriend. She winced at that, but not half as much as when she remembered trying to bluff him into staying. She'd never been a very good poker player, and Joel had called her, walking out into the night once again.

  She went over the events in her head again, more of the details filling in as the fogginess of the night was pushed away by adrenaline. She'd said things to Joel that she should have kept to herself. Things she'd been thinking lately, but never would have uttered if it hadn't been for the Jägermeister truth serum running through her veins.

  Now who knows what would happen. Would he ever come back again? Should she go out looking for him and apologize? He was probably at the Rock House, or would head to a shelter near there for the night. He wanted privacy though. Wasn't that what the whole fight had been about? No, if he was going to come back it needed to be on his own. And she would just have to wait and see if he did.

  She flipped the covers back over her head, releasing the trapped and stale air as cooler air from the apartment washed over her. The contrast was almost enough to let her imagine her air conditioner was working again, at least for the few seconds until she adjusted to the new temperature and started to feel hot again.

  She rolled out of bed and pulled off her sweaty clothes as she headed for a shower. If she was going to accuse Joel of feeling sorry for himself, she should make sure she wasn't also guilty of it. She needed to take her mind off him and their issues for a little while, at least until it was time to go back to the bar. The fast paced and noisy environment there wou
ld definitely keep her from obsessing.

  She veered off course and into the living room, picking up her phone and quickly dialing.

  "Room 114 please," she said to the woman who answered. She waited patiently to be connected until she heard a familiar voice on the other end.

  "Hi Nana," she said, raising her voice in case the older woman wasn't wearing her hearing aid. She tended not to wear it when she wasn't expecting company.

  "Hello? Who is this?"

  "It's Amber, Nana."

  "Who?"

  "Amber. Judith's daughter."

  "Judy? Is that you?"

  "No, it's Amber," she sighed. "Can I come for a visit today?"

  "Of course, Judy dear. I'd love to see you. Is your brother coming as well?"

  "No, just me," she said. "I'll be there in an hour."

  "Okay dear."

  She hung up the phone, a heaviness in her chest as she walked back to the bathroom and turned on the water. Her maternal grandmother had lived with her and her parents from the time Amber was 12, helping to raise her just as puberty was starting to confuse her world. Nana had always been a more calming and balanced presence than her own mother, her easy-going attitude a sharp contrast to her mother's exacting expectations. Her father had largely stayed out of most things, siding with her mother whenever he was put on the spot.

  But then Alzheimer's had started when Amber was 15. At first, they didn't really notice it. Nana was in her seventies so it was normal that she would forget things. But then it got worse, and she started to mix people up or to find them completely unfamiliar - often forgetting Amber entirely or confusing her with her mother Judith. Soon she was disoriented and confused more often than not.

  When Amber was 16, her grandmother fell down the stairs, breaking her hip. She never fully recovered from that, and needed a wheelchair from then on. It fell to Amber to take care of her at nights while her parents worked, having shifted their jobs around so that they were more available during the day while she was at school. She would help feed and bath her, show her pictures of the family and try to help her remember. Mostly she just spent time with her. It was during that time that she realized how much she enjoyed helping people, and considered becoming a nurse.

  But after high school, her family didn't have much money since they had spent a lot of it on medical bills. Her father died of a heart attack when she was 18, and her mother ended up losing her job at around the same time. She was able to find another one pretty quickly, but it wasn't as flexible with the hours, even though it paid more. That meant that she wouldn't be around during the day, so Amber gave up on the idea of college altogether and got a job at the bar so she would be available for Nana until her mother came home.

  Within a year, though, Nana had deteriorated too far, and was beyond her ability to care for properly. They'd had to move her into a home. When she left, so did Amber.

  It had been too long since she'd been for a visit. It would be the perfect thing to get her mind off of Joel.

  Joel

  Joel got to Rock House just before 9 A.M. full of energy. He was glad he had slept for hours before Amber had come home, or he'd probably be a zombie today.

  After their fight, he had headed over to Neutron's, the bar that Randy, the underground fight club organizer, usually frequented. When he had been fighting and winning, most of their nights would end at Neutron's where they would party until the wee hours of the morning. The only reason he came along was because Randy would always be buying, flush with the night's take from all of the bets. Joel could score some food and a couple of beers without having to dip into his own savings, and even when he had to fight the next day it was never until after dark, giving him plenty of time to rest.

  Things hadn't changed, and Randy had been there celebrating with a few young fighters who Joel didn't recognize. Randy was happy to see Joel, and even happier when he told him he wanted to fight again. News about Joel's tournament at Golden Dragon had reached the promoter and he thought it would help spur some gambling on the man who had come so close to fighting Carlos Alvarez. Apparently Carlos had become a big deal around town as well, as he was slated to fight in a televised event for Titan, which was rumored to often be used as a farm league for some of the bigger players like the UFC, Strikeforce or PrideFC.

  Randy told Joel that he could set up a fight for that very night, and Joel had jumped at the chance to earn some money again. He was also excited about being able to release some of his temper. Rock House would help with that as well, but it was far more satisfying to feel his bare knuckles slam into flesh than the bounce of the rubber gloves he had to wear during practice. He left soon after speaking with Randy and was able to get in almost three more hours of sleep, meaning he was rested and ready to go for training.

  The other guys were already there and had started their warm-up by the time Joel met them at their corner of the mat.

  "Got somewhere more important to be, Slater?" Blake asked as soon as the new fighter joined them.

  "I thought we started at nine," he replied.

  "We don't just do the bare minimum here, Slater. That might be what you're used to, but it doesn't fly at Rock House."

  "Hey, why don't you go fuck yourself?" Joel shot back. He was in no mood for dealing with Blake being an asshole again.

  Blake stopped what he was doing and walked forward, pressing his chest up against Joel. "You want to repeat that, you freeloading rookie?"

  "Sure, why don't-"

  "Guys, guys, come on," Chris said, wedging his hands between the two men and pushing them apart. "You know how Shawn feels about getting into personal fights. You want to get kicked out?"

  Blake sneered at Joel and lifted his chin before turning on his heel. "Keep your mouth in line, Slater. Your training gear only protects your vitals."

  Joel snorted at the veiled threat, opening his mouth to reply, but a warning glare from Chris made him swallow his retort. He was right. Blake wasn't worth getting kicked out. They could settle their differences when they were sparring.

  Despite the fact that he had more distracting him today than he had yesterday, Joel was able to focus his anger and emotions into his session. Even still, when it came time to spar, he made sure to step up to Blake immediately to show the bigger man that he wasn't intimidated.

  He could feel the eyes of the other fighters on them as they faced off, only half paying attention to their own matches.

  As soon as they started, Blake lunged forward, just as he had last time. Joel hadn't forgotten that opener or the man's surprising speed, though, so he was ready. He moved quickly out of the way, throwing his elbow and catching Blake on the back as he passed. The big man turned back around to face him before Joel could do any other damage.

  They began to circle now, with Blake more wary about his approach. All of a sudden, he threw a kick towards Joel's midsection which he barely dodged, but then followed it up with a quick jab that snapped his head back. Blake moved forward, trying to catch Joel before he had a chance to recover but Joel was ready, throwing his own right handed punch.

  It was too slow, and Blake grabbed his extended arm with his left and pulled Joel off balance as he swung his other arm over Joel's shoulder, connecting both together into a kimura. His right leg hooked behind Joel and he tripped him as both men fell to the ground. Joel knew he was in trouble as Blake started to move the trapped arm sideways towards Joel's back. The pain of the arm lock was excruciating, but Joel resisted tapping out and instead put all of his energy into yanking his leg out from under Blake's in one explosive movement. As soon as it was free, he rolled forward, releasing his arm from the submission and dragging it out from under the bigger man.

  He leapt on top of Blake, swinging his body around and into a full mount position, reversing the fortunes of the two men by giving himself the advantage now. From that position, he started to unleash his fists against the other man's helmeted head. In a typical fight, this would be pretty effective in quickly inc
apacitating an opponent, but between the gloves and the helmet he knew he wasn't really doing any real damage.

  Blake then jerked his hips up, throwing Joel forward as his opponent slid out and brought his legs up, wrapping them around Joel who refused to be thrown off. Their positions had changed again and Blake was now in full guard. The two men spent the rest of the session in a stalemate until time was called by Kingston who was sitting out and watching.

  Blake's legs loosened and Joel rolled out. As he did, he heard the other man grunt. "Better."

  Joel didn't spar with Blake again for the rest of the day, instead spending most of his time working on submissions with Chris. By the time he left, it was time for dinner and he headed back to the shelter. With luck, he could get a quick meal there and then take a nap before his fight tonight. He had suggested the submission work to Chris today on purpose, knowing that working on arm bars and leg locks wouldn't leave him quite as exhausted as he had been last night after training, and it had worked. But he still wanted to rest so that he came to the fight ready to win.