Trouble with Luv'

by Pamela Yaye

  “A bottle of water would be great.”

  She nodded. “It was nice meeting you guys.”

  Bug-eyed, the four men watched her sashay over to one of the street vendor carts.

  Darius wiped the sweat away from his forehead. Xavier’s date was a woman of indescribable beauty. She was sophisticated and everything about her was sexy. Her smile. Her walk. Even her laugh. Nudging Xavier with his elbow, he asked, “Where in the world did you find baby girl?” He shook his head wistfully. “I’m not trying to knock you down or anything but Ms. Thang is way out of your league. Honey needs a man with my charm and expertise, so why don’t you slide me her number?”

  Xavier chuckled.

  “A young pup like you can’t handle all that woman, X,” Nathan chimed in.

  Juan couldn’t resist. “Careful, boy, girlfriend looks like she could put a hurtin’ on you.”

  “Back to my original question,” Darius cut in impatiently, “where did you meet her and where can I get one just like her?”

  “I met Ebony at the church banquet I invited you three knuckleheads to.” When Darius’s mouth cracked open, Xavier jabbed a finger at his chest. “I think your exact words were ‘church is for suckers.’” In a mocking tone of voice, he said, “See, that’s what you get for not listening to me. The food was delicious, the entertainment was incredible and there was a roomful of gorgeous, professional women.”

  Darius released a slow whistle. “If there are sisters at your church who look like that, sign me up, X. I’m there!”

  After two hours of fighting the crowds and contending with the heat and humidity, Ebony and Xavier were starving. While she hunted for a secluded space at the park, he set off in search of lunch.

  A frown formed between her eyebrows when she spotted Xavier. He was headed straight for her, but he didn’t have hot dogs or hamburgers or chilli cheese fries. “What’s that?” she asked as he approached.

  “A cooler.”

  “What’s in it?”

  Xavier had an amused glint in his eyes. “You’ll see.” He spread a white blanket on the grass and unloaded the cooler. Bacon and lettuce sandwiches, a fruit platter laced with watermelon, pineapple and cantaloupe, homemade fruit punch, and cinnamon buns covered the width of the blanket in mere seconds. Jazz music playing softly in the background, supplied a romantic scene. The delightful shrieks of children far off in the distance made Ebony suddenly feel youthful and free.

  Ebony looked down at the blanket. Xavier had thought of everything. No paper plates for them, either; he had brought along dishes, cutlery and even wineglasses. “Did you make all this?” she asked, once he was finished blessing the food.

  “Everything but the fruit.”

  Ebony laughed. While they ate, they spoke freely about their backgrounds. In the next hour, she learned that he had had a fleeting basketball career overseas, had been to all seven continents, and spoke French and Spanish fluently.

  “French and Spanish? Wow! That’s impressive. I had the hardest time just trying to master English!”

  Xavier chuckled. “My great-great-grandparents immigrated to America from French Guiana, back in the early fifties. My mother wanted us to retain as much of the culture as possible so she forced us to take French classes at the local YMCA. Jackie and I joined the Guianese Association and there we learned how to make traditional foods like cumin chicken, tomato rice and my specialty, callaloo soup. Every other year, my parents took us to Guiana for summer vacation. Jackie and I had the time of our lives. We swam in the ocean, played with our cousins and even climbed coconut trees.”

  “I envy you, Xavier. You have such a rich background.” What she didn’t say was that she wished her parents had taken that kind of interest in her. Ebony helped herself to another piece of fruit. “Say something to me in French.”

  “La prochaine fois que nous dinons, vous allez être le…cuisiner.”

  Ebony fanned herself with her hands. “Ooh! I don’t know what you said or what it means, but it sounded good! What did you say?”

  “I said, ‘the next time we have dinner, you’re going to cook!’”

  They shared a laugh.

  “I know you probably get asked this all the time, but what’s it like being a twin? Do you and Jacqueline get along?”

  “Do black people like chicken?” Xavier chortled at his own joke, and Ebony couldn’t help laughing, too. She was high on fresh air and conversation and Xavier could do no wrong. “It’s true what they say about twins. We share the same thoughts, finish each other’s sentences, and I know this is going to be hard to believe, but when something’s wrong with Jackie, I can sense it. It sounds spooky, but it’s just a part of who we are. She got remarried last year and she and her husband are expecting their first child.”

  Xavier stared at the family of four meandering past, a contemplative expression on his face.

  “How many kids do you want?” Ebony could see Xavier with a whole bunch of kids. His warm nature would make him an excellent father.

  “I don’t know, but five sounds like a good number.”

  “That’s five too many for me.”

  “You don’t want to have kids? Why?”

  Ebony took another piece of watermelon from the bowl and bit into it. Watermelon juice dribbled down her chin. She patted her mouth with a napkin and wiped her hands. “I couldn’t imagine balancing a family with my hectic career. I love what I do and I’ve worked hard to get where I am. The way I see it is, some women are destined to achieve greatness in the business world and some are destined to be incredible wives and mothers. I think I fall into the first category.”

  As Ebony shielded her eyes from the sun, her mind wandered back to her childhood days. She had never had dolls or played house when she was a little girl; firecrackers, trucks and action figures had been her favorite toys. Her dreams had never revolved around being a wife or a mother. All she had ever dreamed about was being a firefighter. At twelve, she had shelved the idea of running into burning buildings and instead, spent hours combing teen magazines for the latest trends in clothes, hair and makeup.

  Ebony had never been wedding-obsessed. Not even in college, when her closest friends were getting engaged and all she heard about was designer gowns, guest lists and honeymoon destinations. When she thought about marriage, there was only one word that came to mind: misery. And she had her parents to thank for that.

  “Marriage is hard work,” Xavier was saying when Ebony returned to the conversation. “But nothing worth having in life is easy.” He studied her for a few seconds. “I’m surprised you think you can’t balance having a family and a career. You strike me as the type of woman who can accomplish anything she puts her mind to.”

  She acknowledged his compliment with a smile. “A few years ago I bought the cutest brown terrier. I bought all the pet supplies the clerk recommended and took her home. I had the dog bed, the fancy combs, all the grooming supplies and the most expensive dog food, but you know what? After three weeks I had to return Lace to the pet store. She ended up being too much responsibility and I couldn’t handle it all. Pathetic, huh?”

  Xavier smiled softly. “Not at all.”

  “Could you imagine me taking care of a baby?” Ebony shuddered at the thought.

  “Are there other reasons why you don’t want to have children?”

  This time when Ebony spoke, she did from her heart. “I didn’t have much of a relationship with my parents. My dad was a city bus driver and my mom was a supervisor at a convalescent home. They spent their entire day serving other people and by the time they got home, they didn’t have anything left to give to me. My dad, Simeon, was a bully and my mother buckled under his domineering personality. Most of the time, I just stayed in my room reading and doing crossword puzzles. I found ways to keep myself busy, but I always envied the close relationships my classmates had with their parents.”

  Xavier didn’t want to pry, but he wanted to know more. The loneliness and pain she had endu
red as a child were evident in her voice, and outlined in her eyes. He ached to take her in his arms and stoke away the hurtful words and neglect she had faced. “What’s your relationship with your parents like now?” he queried, after a notable pause. “Are you on better terms?”

  “They died in a car accident eight years ago.”

  Xavier reached out and covered her hands with his own.

  The welcomed gesture made Ebony yearn for more. Much more. It had been months since she had felt the soothing touch of a man’s hands. Three months to be exact. She found herself fantasizing about what it would be like to make love to Xavier. He was generous and polite, and if his personality was any indication of what he was like in bed, he was probably a tender, patient lover. Ebony could do tender and patient. She would do anything he wanted her to. The sound of his voice snapped her mind into focus.

  “I’m sorry about your parents.” Xavier shook his head sadly, his eyes communicating that he understood what Ebony must have gone through. “I don’t know what I would do if I lost one of my parents, let alone both. That must have been a difficult time for you.”

  Ebony could only nod. He had no idea.

  Xavier wanted to know how she had survived losing her parents. Maybe hearing about that time in her life might give him insight into why she was so fiercely independent. He was starting to understand why Ebony felt the need to be in control all the time. She had been taking care of herself for years. “Do you feel uncomfortable talking about what happened?”

  “No.” Ebony was uncomfortable, but not because they were talking about the death of her parents. She didn’t want Xavier to think less of her than he already did. If she bared her soul to him, told him she didn’t shed a single tear during the ordeal and didn’t miss them, Xavier would label her heartless.

  Ebony had tried for years to win her parents’ affection with no success. She survived her high school years on a meager five hours of sleep a night, and studied relentlessly in the hopes of having the highest grades in her class. She’d succeeded. But when Ebony told her father she was going to be valedictorian, he mumbled congratulations and continued watching the nightly news.

  That was the day Ebony had given up trying to impress him. She had surrounded herself with friends, and spent more time with her aunt Mae. In her mind, Simeon and Ingrid Garrett had died long before Officer Huntington stood in the dimly lit foyer and told her the tragic news. Ebony remembered that bitter winter day as if it were yesterday, rather than almost a decade ago.

  Her entire body had gone numb and then her legs had slipped out from underneath her. Aunt Mae said she had passed out, but to this day Ebony couldn’t remember what happened. The days following were a blur. Flowers arrived in what seemed like hundreds, visitors came by to offer their sympathies and funeral arrangements were made. Food was cooked, desserts were baked and when the day of the burial finally arrived, all eyes were on her. But Ebony held it together. She cried, but not for her parents. She wept for what could have been. The missed hugs. The words of encouragement. Their unwavering love and support.

  There is no fear in love; perfect love casts out all fear, the minister had said, his gentle eyes searching her face. His message of hope was simple and touched her deeply. An overwhelming sense of peace had washed over her as she listened to him speak. And when the last guest had left her parents’ house five hours later, Ebony had a plan and a purpose for her life.

  “How did your parents meet?” Xavier wanted Ebony to open up to him. Trust was the foundation for every relationship, regardless of the degree, and he wanted her to know he could be trusted with her secrets.

  The silver bangles on Ebony’s hand clanked together when she dusted bread crumbs off her skirt. As her eyes drifted around the park grounds, she thought about the answers. Simeon and Ingrid’s eighteen-year marriage had been one of convenience, not love. When Ingrid had discovered she was three months pregnant, Simeon had done the right thing by proposing. There was no elaborate wedding with family and friends. The occasion hadn’t been commemorated with wine toasts, photographs and wedding cake. A civil court ceremony on a frosty Tuesday afternoon, an office receptionist and security guard the only witnesses, had been sufficient for the penniless couple.

  Ebony didn’t know how to answer Xavier’s question. Vacillating between sharing her most vivid childhood memories and changing the topic altogether, she said, “You have a lot of personal questions, Xavier. Are you trying to figure out why I don’t want to have children, or convince me that the past has little bearing on one’s future?”

  “You may not have had a picture-perfect childhood, Ebony, but that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t make a good mother. I think you’d be a kind and loving parent.” Xavier winked. “What child wouldn’t be thrilled to call you Momma?”

  A smile found its way on to Ebony’s lips. Me a mother? A comfortable silence hovered over them, allowing enough time for her to digest her thoughts. Ebony watched as people packed up their supplies and strolled leisurely toward the park entrance. The park was virtually empty but the musicians kept right on playing.

  Xavier felt something stir within him. He didn’t know if it was the way Ebony looked, so feminine and pretty, or learning about her troubled upbringing, but he wanted her in his arms. Something about being with her felt right. The space between them suddenly seemed restrictive. Xavier reached out and caressed her cheek. In response she nuzzled her face against his hand.

  Ebony knew that if they were ever going to get anywhere, Xavier had to be the one to make the first move, so she waited patiently. She leaned into him, and he took it from there. He glided his tongue into her mouth, tasting and teasing. The scent of her skin was intoxicating. It enveloped him like a hug. Lost as they were in their own escape, the distant chatter whirling around them ceased to exist. Wanting, needing, aching, Xavier palmed and stroked her breasts through her flimsy shirt. He fondled and plucked. Ebony was the type of woman a man could never get enough of. She was so sensual and utterly erotic, it hurt.

  Ebony was hot. Her skin was tingling, her nipples were hard, and she could feel moisture building between her legs. Apt fingers brushed back and forth across his crotch. Then, in one fluid motion, her hands were inside his shorts and she was stroking his shaft.

  Xavier moaned. Returning the favor, he unhooked her bra and took her breasts into his hands. Soon, the feel of her nipples under his fingertips was not enough. He wanted to capture a nipple in his mouth, and suck it until his tongue was sore.

  Ebony wanted him in the worst possible way. Well aware that they were in a public place, she forced herself to maintain an element of control. But as their kisses and touches intensified, Ebony found it an impossible task. She wanted to rip off Xavier’s shirt and taste every inch of him. Love him like he had never been loved before. Brand him with the heat of her lips. Stroke him to ecstasy with the work of her hands. Show him a kind of pleasure he had never known before.

  “I…should take you…home,” Xavier stammered, ending the kiss. He checked the zipper on his pants, his eyes flittering nervously around the park. Thank God no one’s watching. They were the only couple left on the east side of the field, and as far as he could see, the once thriving crowd of music lovers had thinned. Darkness had swallowed up the day, the glow of the stars the only light.

  Xavier didn’t know what had gotten into him. He had been one second away from hoisting up her skirt, plunging deep inside her and satisfying his craving. Never mind that they were in a public place or that they were on their first “official” date or that he had promised himself he wouldn’t go there with her. Xavier knew things had gotten out of hand but he had felt powerless to resist.

  Xavier averted his gaze from her eyes. One deep breath followed another. He poured himself some juice and gulped it down. Within seconds, his head had cleared and he was back in control. “It’s getting late,” he stated, checking his watch. The sun was sinking behind the clouds and the temperature had dropped considerably. “We
should go. We’re the last ones here.”

  Good, she thought, her lips curving into a sinuous smile. Ebony didn’t want to leave. She wanted more. They were in a deserted park and the possibilities were endless. Ready to finish what Xavier had started, she kissed him again.

  When they broke away, she could see his resolve was faltering. His eyes were heavy with lust and his breathing was quick and ragged. “I think we should stay,” she told him, putting a hand to his cheek.

  Xavier stood to his feet.

  “I don’t get it…we were on the verge of…I thought you wanted to—” Ebony stopped. There was no point in going on. Xavier wasn’t listening. He was busying himself with gathering up the empty food containers. Garbage was thrown out, plates and utensils were returned to the cooler and the blanket was folded and tucked under his arm.

  “Ready?”

  Ebony nodded and followed him through the park.

  “Are you free tomorrow?” he asked, once they were back inside his car. Xavier wanted to see her again, but he didn’t want to appear eager. Women didn’t respond well to being smothered, especially independent ones like Ebony. She didn’t have to verbalize her feelings, but he knew she didn’t want anyone getting too close.

  “What do you have in mind?” Ebony hoped it was more of what they had left behind in the park. She had expected the day to end on a high note, not with her sexually frustrated and entertaining thoughts of breaking out her little black book. Xavier had dangled explosive, toe-curling sex in front of her and then snatched it away. Ebony wanted to make love tonight, but it wouldn’t do any good to call up one of her old loves. Xavier Reed was the only man she wanted.

  Ebony looked over at Xavier. He was clearly Mr. self-control. She didn’t know anybody who had that type of discipline. It was a commendable trait. Not one that could be fully appreciated or admired at the present moment, but maybe after an ice-cold shower she would reflect on all of his formidable qualities.