‘You made this? Wow...’
‘Mumma helped.’ Hana was bouncing from one foot to the other. ‘We picked the flowers on the way home. I picked all the yellow ones. And the pink ones.’
‘It’s an art form you’ll find on most Pacific islands.’ Vailea was smiling at Bugsy’s enthusiastic appreciation of his drink. ‘We love our flowers.’
‘They’re pretty,’ Hana told Luke with the solemn tone of imparting great wisdom. ‘Like flutterbys.’
‘They are indeed.’
Luke was smiling at Hana and Anahera found herself staring intently at his face. She knew that expression. Her heart did a funny double flip thing. This was it, wasn’t it? The moment he had fallen in love with his daughter.
Sam and Vailea were smiling, too. As if they thought everything was going according to some plan she wasn’t privy to. Nerves kicked in again and she had to break the moment before something even more momentous happened—like someone telling Hana who Luke really was.
‘We got most of the flowers from around the lagoon. I couldn’t believe how bad the mosquitoes were for that time of day. I’ve never seen so many.’
‘I know.’ Vailea clicked her tongue as she sat down and started to pour a drink for herself. ‘It’s appalling. Nobody’s been able to get hold of Ian Lockhart. We’re hoping that Caroline can sort out the aerial spraying when she gets back next week.’
‘Maybe I’ll just sort it out myself,’ Sam said quietly. ‘We can’t afford to wait any longer. People are getting bitten far more than in previous years and it’s Russian roulette whether they are infected mosquitoes or not.’
Hana was listening to the adults talking. Was it Anahera’s imagination or had she edged closer to where Luke was sitting? She took a deep breath. If she had, it was probably because Bugsy had settled at Sam’s feet, on Luke’s other side.
‘I got bitten,’ Hana said proudly.
‘What?’ Any need to observe the signals of a developing relationship between Luke and Hana evaporated. ‘When? Why didn’t you tell me?’
The happy glow faded from Hana’s face. She clearly thought she was in some kind of trouble and she didn’t know why. And Luke was frowning. Did he think she was a bad mother because she hadn’t noticed?
‘Wasn’t it itchy?’ Luke tilted his head to catch Hana’s gaze. ‘Did you have to scratch? Like this?’ He demonstrated scratching by crossing his arms and tickling his armpits. Hana laughed and the sound cut through the sudden tension in the group.
It had had even more of an effect on Luke. The way he was looking at Hana now brought a lump to Anahera’s throat. She knew how that felt—the unbelievable joy of hearing Hana laugh for the first time. It was something she would never forget. Like the feeling when she’d seen that first smile and witnessed those first, wobbly baby steps.
Luke had missed out on so much and she wanted to make up for it somehow. To share all those things. Would he want to see the baby photos and videos or was it too soon? It might be like rubbing salt into a very raw wound at this point.
‘Bessie fixed it,’ Hana said. ‘She put magic stuff on it and it stopped scratching. See?’
Twisting her little body, she pointed to the back of her knee. A small red dot was barely visible. No wonder Anahera hadn’t spotted it at bathtime.
She raised her gaze to find Luke watching her and for a long moment they held the eye contact. The telepathic conversation was the kind that only parents would have when they were sharing the same worry about their child.
And it felt...good. As if something huge that had been missing from her life was suddenly there.
Someone to share the worry. Coming home to live with her mother had given her that kind of relief but this was different. Her mother was more like an extension of herself. Luke was Hana’s father—the missing piece of the puzzle.
‘It must have been days ago,’ she said aloud. ‘It’s almost gone.’
I’ll be watching her, her gaze added. Like a hawk. Don’t worry...
* * *
‘I wonder what the “magic” stuff was,’ Sam said. ‘Maybe it’s an ointment made from the same bushes they make that M’Langi tea from?’
‘I’ll ask Bessie,’ Vailea said. She held out her hand to Hana. ‘Come on, darling. I’m going to give you some dinner and then it’s time for your bath.’
Luke was still watching even when they had disappeared into the house. He was struggling a bit with how overwhelming this was.
Anyone would have found Hana an adorable child. Listening to her talk, seeing the wonder of life shining from her eyes, hearing her laugh... To know that this was his daughter made it so much more powerful. The connection was already there—he could feel it in every cell of his body. The love was there, too, ready to be bestowed, and the need to offer protection was so strong he’d felt a moment of sheer panic when she’d told them about that mosquito bite.
How ridiculous was that? The odds of it having been from an infected mosquito were very low and she was obviously perfectly healthy days after the event. It could have been more than a week ago, in fact, and she could be well past the time when symptoms of encephalitis could appear.
‘An ointment is a bit different from tea,’ Anahera was saying to Sam. ‘Maybe they use a different part of the bush. Like the bark. Don’t they use the leaves for the tea?’
‘It wouldn’t be the bark.’ Luke tried to refocus his attention on the conversation. ‘I’ve been doing a bit of reading about the medicinal uses of hibiscus. The tea’s usually made from an infusion of the flowers from crimson or magenta-coloured flowers. Leaves can be used, too, but the bark’s only useful for making rope or caulking ships.’
‘Have you found any scientific evidence of effects?’ Sam leaned forward, clearly interested in the subject. Anahera had turned her head to glance at the door to the house. Would she prefer to be inside with her family?
‘There’s been quite a lot of studies done,’ he told Sam. ‘There’s some evidence that it acts as a mild diuretic and it can lower blood pressure in people with type two diabetes.’
‘That could be useful. Type two diabetes is getting to be an increasing problem in all the islands.’
‘It can also act as a gentle laxative, apparently. And an anti-inflammatory. It’s supposed to be good for stomach irritation. Some researchers think it may contain chemicals that work like antibiotics.’
‘Not so farfetched to think it could work like an antiviral, then?’
‘Hmm. I read something about it potentially being able to kill worms so maybe going down the track of an insect repellent is valid.’
It was so much easier having Sam here. For a short time Luke had been so immersed in this discussion he’d been totally distracted from where he was—and why...
But then Hana appeared again and this time she was wearing a pair of pink pyjamas that had a butterfly print on them. Her hair was a mass of damp ringlets and her face was full of the joy of life again.
‘Come over here, chicken,’ Sam said. ‘I want my goodnight kiss.’
Hana happily scrambled over Bugsy and held her arms up for a cuddle. Sam tickled her until she shrieked with laughter and then kissed the top of her head with a loud smack.
‘Sweet dreams,’ he said.
Hana wriggled out of his arms. Anahera stood up. ‘Bedtime, sweetheart,’ she said. There was a tiny silence as everybody noticed the little girl wasn’t moving. Anahera cleared her throat. ‘Don’t forget to say goodnight to Luke.’
There was shyness back in those big brown eyes. She’d just been released from a loving farewell from her uncle Sam but this was new ground and she wasn’t sure how to say goodnight to this new person in her life. How had Sam made it seem so natural? Oh, yeah... Luke smiled and held out his arms.
He wasn’t really expecting Hana to ac
cept the offered hug. Not this easily anyway, but she didn’t hesitate. She knew what to do now and those little arms went round his neck and squeezed hard. For just a precious few seconds Luke could feel the whole shape of that little body. He could feel her heart beating and the puff of her breath on his neck.
The feeling of loss when she wriggled free was equally unexpected and Luke found himself blinking hard as he watched Anahera scoop Hana into her arms. She clung like a little monkey, her arms and legs wrapped around her mother, and he could see the way the little body instantly relaxed, her head burrowing into the dip below Anahera’s shoulder and her eyes closing. By the look of it, she would probably be asleep by the time she was put into her bed. There was no mistaking the bond between these two as Anahera’s head tilted to press against Hana’s drying curls. Nobody else existed for either of them in that moment, and Luke felt the exclusion so clearly it was a physical ache. Was it even possible to become a part of that human unit?
Again, he found himself staring at the empty frame of the front door when Anahera had carried Hana inside.
‘That went well,’ Sam murmured. ‘Don’t you think?’
Luke didn’t respond with anything more than a grunt and he picked up his beer to avoid having to try and articulate what he was thinking.
He wouldn’t have known where to start anyway. Instead, he let his gaze drift. To the bowl of petals on the table and then over the railings of the veranda to the village surrounding this small house. The sun was setting but there was a group of children playing football farther down on the dusty road. The faint sound of their laughter could be easily heard.
Could he imagine his daughter living in London? Where would you go to find brightly coloured petals there? Where were there any roads that would be a safe playground?
He couldn’t imagine it. Anahera was right—merging their lives would never have worked.
And he’d been right, too. She had never really loved him. Okay, he could accept why she’d kept Hana’s existence a secret at first but to keep it up when she knew the truth... That was unacceptable. Unthinkable. How could anyone do that to someone they cared about?
Discovering just how much he had missed out on was making it all the worse.
His appetite had fled and he was hard put to do more than taste the delicious meal that Vailea had prepared.
‘Must be something in the air,’ she said. ‘Hana wasn’t hungry either.’
‘Well, I’ve made up for them both.’ Sam sighed. ‘We might need to take the long way home, Bugsy.’
‘I’ll come with you,’ Luke said. ‘I’d like to talk about the M’Langi tea study with you some more.’
There was a sudden, awkward silence. And then Vailea reached for his half-empty plate and it sounded like she was deliberately trying to keep her tone casual. ‘I thought you and Ana might like a chance to talk,’ she said. ‘I’ve got some coffee brewing.’
Anahera was pushing a bit of fish around her plate. Maybe her appetite hadn’t been any better than his own. She looked up, and he was reminded of the moment they’d met, when he’d been horrified to see what had looked like fear in her eyes. How had it come to this—that she could be afraid of him and what he might do to her life?
He couldn’t go there now. It would be so hard and he was already emotionally exhausted.
‘We’ll have plenty of time to talk,’ he said. ‘Thank you, Vailea. This has been...been...’ He couldn’t find any words. What had happened here this evening for him was simply too huge.
‘It was a pleasure.’ Vailea touched his arm before picking up the plate, excusing him from having to say anything more. ‘You’re welcome here any time, Luke. You’re part of our family now.’
Sam must have sensed that this was the best note to end this introduction on. He clicked his fingers to summon Bugsy and hugged both Vailea and Anahera. Maybe Luke was expected to follow suit but it was all suddenly too much. He could only mutter his thanks and duck his head in farewell before following Sam.
‘It was a good start,’ Sam said. ‘You all need a bit of time now to get used to things. You’ll work it out.’
‘I hope so.’
‘You’re a lucky man, you know that?’
Luke’s breath came out in a huff. ‘It’s a mess, mate. How come that’s lucky?’
‘You have the most beautiful daughter on earth. I’d give my right arm for a gift like that.’
They walked in silence for a while, and Luke found the colliding thoughts and feelings in his head beginning to slow down and find a pattern.
A gift.
Yes. Despite the fact that he had lost his trust in Anahera and knew they could never have a future together, their child was a gift that would change his life for ever in a very good way.
He should find happiness in that and he did. Of course he did. It was just unfair that opposing emotions seemed to be two-sided coins. Love and hate. Happiness and sadness. That particular coin seemed to be spinning on its side for him right now. Which side would end up showing? The unimaginable happiness of having Hana in his life?
Or the sadness in losing Ana?
CHAPTER TEN
‘I DON’T WANT IT.’
‘But mango’s your favourite. Would you rather have an egg? With soldiers?’
‘No.’ Hana rubbed at her eyes with tight little fists, and Anahera cast a worried glance at Vailea, who was almost ready to leave for work. She kissed the cloud of curls in need of brushing and moved towards her mother as she lowered her voice.
‘She barely ate anything last night either. And look at her—she looks like she needs to go back to sleep.’
‘It’s early.’ Vailea’s smile was reassuring. ‘You could both go back to bed for a bit, love. It’s your day off, after all.’ She picked up her bag. ‘If you’re worried, bring her up to see Sam later.’
Anahera nodded. She felt Hana’s forehead. She put her hand on her own forehead and then felt Hana’s again. Was it warmer?
‘What are you doing, Mumma?’
‘Just checking. Do you feel sick, sweetheart? Have you got a sore throat or a sore head?’
‘No.’
‘Are you still tired?’ Anahera was tired herself, which was hardly surprising after another night of sleep eluding her. Her mother’s suggestion was starting to seem rather attractive. ‘Shall we go and have a cuddle in Mummy’s bed for a bit and have a story?’
Hana smiled and nodded and slid off her chair. ‘I’ll get my book. The big book...’
The worry ebbed. The big book was an illustrated version of old fairy tales that Hana loved. The day would soon get too hot to laze in bed but she could enjoy some time reading aloud with her daughter cuddled deliciously under her arm, tiny fingers ready to help turn the pages and point out the most fascinating things in the pictures.
Time out. If she was reading aloud, her mind couldn’t wander and fret about Hana’s lack of appetite.
Or when they were going to see Luke again.
And what the future might hold...
For a while it was lovely. Hana dozed off, and Anahera soon followed her example. She probably didn’t sleep for more than an hour but it was the uncomfortable warmth that woke her. Hana’s skin felt hot and sticky, and a wave of panic washed through her.
‘Hana? Wake up, darling.’ Her grip must have been firmer than she realised because Hana woke up with a start and immediately burst into tears. Anahera pulled her into a cuddle. ‘Oh, I’m sorry... I didn’t mean to give you a fright.’
‘Go away, Mumma.’ Hana was trying to wriggle free as her sobs quickly subsided. ‘You’re too hot...’
She was hot?
Of course she was. The sun was well up and streaming into her bedroom and they’d been lying under the covers together. She didn’t normally panic like that
. What was wrong with her?
‘Let’s have a shower. We’ll pretend we’re under the waterfall up by the lagoon.’
That was lovely, too. Hana was smiling under the cool rain of the shower and she even ate a piece of mango afterwards. It was Anahera whose appetite had vanished now.
‘Shall we go to the beach and have a swim? Or up to the lagoon?’
Hana shook her head.
‘Where would you like to go, then? Or shall we stay at home today?’
‘I want to go to the patercillar house.’ Big, brown eyes held a pleading edge. ‘With Luke.’
Anahera’s heart sank.
‘But that’s in London, sweetheart. It’s a long, long way away.’
‘I want to go.’ There were tears rapidly filling her eyes now and it wouldn’t be long before they were rolling down her face. It was so unlike Hana that Anahera was alarmed.
Children could pick up on things that had been left unspoken. Was she unsettled by Luke’s appearance in her life without knowing why?
Or was it something more serious? As a medical professional, Anahera knew that a mother’s instinct was not something to be ignored.
‘Tell you what. Let’s go and visit Uncle Sam. He might let us take Bugsy for a walk around the lagoon.’
It was a particularly hot day. The humidity was high and the walk was long and slow. Bone-dry dust coated their feet and geckos basked on the rocks, oblivious to their steps. Even the bright yellow trumpets of the allemande vine looked wilted and maybe it wasn’t surprising that Hana was definitely not her usual, chatty self. Anahera didn’t want to upset her by trying to force conversation so, for the most part, it was a silent companionship. She frequently found her mind wandering, and every time it logged into the circuitous worry about Luke and the future that was rapidly becoming a well-worn track.
She normally loved her days off and time to spend with her daughter like this but happiness was elusive today. She tried to remember what it felt like to be really happy in the hope that she could turn her mood around in case that was something else that Hana was picking up on.
The Nurse Who Stole His Heart Page 13
