The Threshold Child

by Callie Kanno

  Basha was seated at the far end of the table, a dozen or so stitches in her cheek. She and some of the other marked students were muttering darkly amongst themselves. Basha threw Adesina a look of utter detestation and malice. Her thin mouth was pressed into an almost invisible line, and her eyes flashed with undisguised fury. Adesina could only imagine the tale of treachery and woe that Basha was spinning about Adesina to soften the disgrace of being marked.

  There were twelve Shi in her year of training. When they had first begun as children, there had been twice as many students. Nevertheless, yearly advancement was never a guarantee, and proving oneself quickly became a daily requirement.

  Adesina felt an all-too-familiar twinge as she reflected on her life as a student in the fortress. Her childhood ideas of what it would be like to train as a Shimat had been far from the reality. Her initial reaction to her early training had been one of excitement. She had been anxious to prove herself worthy of such an honor. That excitement had rapidly been replaced by a form of desperation. Nothing she did ever seemed like enough, even if it was more than what her classmates could do. Her Shar pushed her more and more each year, expecting her to go beyond her best.

  Half of her knew that it was merely part of the process of becoming all that she could be, but the other half of her continued to feel that desperation--that secret fear that she would fail. She hid this fear with bravado, but it was ever present in the back of her mind.

  Shaking away these dark thoughts, Adesina turned her attention back to her meal.

  After breakfast the Shi proceeded with their daily schedule. It was a review day, so most of their morning was spent in a classroom. Over the years, Adesina had been taught a variety of subjects from botany to psychology, tactics to languages and cultures of the world. Adesina retained information very well, and usually found these review days to be tedious.

  Today was different, for there was a palpable tension in the air. They were being taught by a substitute Shar, which meant that their Shar were most likely meeting with the Sharifal. Adesina, along with all of her classmates, had a hard time concentrating on their anatomy review.

  To get her mind off of her anxiety, Adesina began studying the Shar teaching them that day.

  She was a young woman in her mid to late twenties with striking auburn hair and sharp gray eyes. Adesina assumed that she was still training to be a Shar, based on how she reacted to teaching a class of near graduates. Her emotions were kept in very tight check, but Adesina could sense a bit of underlying nervousness.

  The Shar walked with a slight limp, perhaps from a broken leg that had been poorly set. She was also quite tall for a woman. Adesina wondered if such height was an advantage or a disadvantage as a Shimat warrior.

  Adesina also began to speculate on what kinds of missions this woman would have been sent. Potential Shar were required to give at least five years of service before training as teachers, so this woman must have had some experience.

  Perhaps she had been a bodyguard to an important Shimat. Perhaps she had been a messenger. But it was most likely that she had been a spy. Most Shimat were trained to appear as normal citizens and then placed in cities and towns in every nation. The Shimat always knew exactly what was going on in every part of the continent.

  Such thoughts carried Adesina over into the midday meal at noon. All the students then massed back into the mess hall where they received rations only slightly more ample than their breakfast. Lanil gave Adesina another friendly smile, which Adesina had trouble returning. Her nerves were starting to wear thin.

  After the meal the Shi were sent out to the courtyard for time to practice their skills in weaponry and horsemanship. The courtyard was a large open area, divided into sections that each served a different purpose. There were obstacle courses for those on horseback as well as those on foot, target ranges, circles drawn on the ground for sparring and hand-to-hand combat, etc. The stones on the ground were worn smooth from many years of use, as were the blocks in the surrounding walls. Shimat guards patrolled along the top of the wall like caged panthers pacing back and forth, watching those within the fortress as well as any that might be without.

  As usual, Adesina kept a close eye on Basha and her cohorts, who had the unfortunate tendency to “miss” their mark and send some sort of weapon hurtling in her direction. The first few clumsy attempts had been in their youth, so Adesina’s injuries had been minor. As they grew older and more skilled, so did Adesina’s capacity for sensing danger before it arrived. In a way, Adesina was grateful for the unintentional training she had received from those who meant her harm.

  Adesina began sparring with one of her classmates. They both held long wooden staffs, and wielded them with precision and force. In spite of this, it was clear that both of them were merely going through the motions, for they each had their minds on what lay ahead. Adesina’s thoughts kept turning to the tallest tower, where the Sharifal lived.

  While there were plentiful rumors among the Shi about their revered leader, little was actually known. Those students who were taken to see her never returned, regardless of the reason for their summons. Adesina wondered what the Sharifal looked like and if she had seen her before; for it was said that the Sharifal disguised herself as a Shar and walked among the students.

  Adesina’s sparring partner seemed to be thinking along the same lines. “What do you think she is like?”

  Adesina blocked his blow and returned with one of her own. “Who?”

  “The Sharifal.”

  Adesina frowned. “What makes you think I would know?”

  He flashed his teeth in an expression that was half smile and half grimace as Adesina brought her staff down on his shoulder. “I did not say I thought you knew. I was asking for your opinion.”

  Adesina stepped out of the way of his staff as he jabbed it forward and shrugged. “Why bother speculating? There is no benefit in it.”

  He let his weapon drop ever so slightly, as if letting his guard down. Adesina knew he was just trying to draw her in, and ignored the gesture. She continued to circle cautiously and said in a voice of forced indifference, “I suppose we will know soon enough.”

  There was a noticeable jump in anxiety as their Shar filed into the courtyard. Every Shi fell silent and their bodies became tense. The students stopped what they were doing and bowed to their instructors.

  Per pulled out a list and read the order they were to go see the Sharifal. It alternated between a marked student and the one who had marked them. Adesina was glad to hear her name near the beginning. She didn’t think she could bear the agitation of waiting for hours.

  The Shar left with the first student on the list, and the eleven remaining Shi tried to go back to what they were doing. Some gave up entirely and began pacing along the edge of the courtyard next to the stone walls. Adesina bowed to her classmate, indicating that she was finished sparring, and walked over to the range.

  She was particularly good at throwing knives and the activity took her mind off the stress at hand. Adesina walked to the end of the range and closed her eyes, imagining her goal. There were four targets on the opposite side of the range: one on each side, one in front, and one behind. The object was to run into the center of this circle of targets and throw the knives without breaking stride.

  Adesina took a deep breath and began running at full speed. The calculations of each shot flashed through her mind and translated to action almost automatically. She threw knives at the front and left targets first, then spun and threw knives at the remaining two. She slowed to a stop and inspected each target to see where her knife had struck.

  Most of them stood dead center, but one was slightly left of where she had aimed. Her nerves were proving to be more of a problem than she wanted to admit, and she shook her head in frustration. She gathered her knives and started again, this time with more concentration than before.

  No students returned from their meeting with the Sharifal, but Shar Per reappeared at regula
r intervals to call the next name on his list. Adesina felt a twinge of satisfaction seeing Basha leave with Per pale and shaking.

  Basha’s interview was longer than the students’ before her, which made Adesina even more nervous. Her mind flew over all of the things that could possibly prevent her advancement, in spite of the victory she won the night before. When Per returned and called her name, Adesina hoped she didn’t look as scared as Basha had.

  As Per led her through the fortress to the Sharifal’s tower, the details of her surroundings stood out in Adesina’s mind.

  The fortress was devoid of any sort of decoration. The walls were a dull gray stone, lined with torches that were rarely lit. Every so often there would be a brazier that lent a little heat, but not enough to overcome the chill of the season. It was a drab and gloomy place, but Adesina didn’t have much with which she could compare it. The only time she ever left the fortress was to train in the surrounding area, which consisted of the woods and the small strip of grassland along the coast.

  They arrived at the base of the Sharifal’s tower, where Jareb was waiting. Jareb dismissed Per and led Adesina up the long winding staircase. At first Adesina silently counted the stairs as they climbed, but the numbers got higher and higher until she finally gave up. She sighed softly and stared at the back of Jareb’s head, wishing he would say something.

  They finally reached the top of the tower, where Breyen stood waiting for them. He was standing next to two stern-looking Shimat who were guarding a simple wooden door. Breyen dismissed Jareb and waited until he left to speak.

  “Shi Adesina, you have come before the Sharifal as victor of your trial. Enter and be recognized.”

  He opened the door and stood back. Adesina walked through the door with as much confidence as she could muster. She found herself in a large circular room that was both meticulously tidy and minimalistic. A good portion of the walls were covered with bookshelves, some of which were bolted shut. There were two windows: one facing toward the courtyard and the other facing towards the ocean. There was a large desk placed next to the ocean-viewing window, which was covered with neat stacks of papers and books.

  As Adesina’s eyes turned on the Sharifal, she stopped in her tracks and stared in shock, unable to believe what she saw.

  Chapter Three: Changes

  “Signe!”

  The woman sitting behind the desk was the same woman who had raised Adesina when her mother died in childbirth. She had been a second mother to the young Shi, always encouraging her to go beyond her best. Adesina had assumed that Signe only served as a nursemaid for the Shar Children. Yet here she was, the leader of the entire Shimat order.

  Signe was dressed in the black robes of a Shar, but with a heavy gold chain and pendant around her neck. She was a middle-aged woman with a strong build, raven hair and piercing blue eyes. There was a very businesslike feeling to her gaze, and a deep determination that showed she was a woman to be reckoned with.

  She patiently waited as Adesina struggled to find her voice. “You are the Sharifal?”

  Signe indicated toward the chair in front of her desk. “Sit down, child.”

  Adesina did so, numbly. “Why did you not tell me?”

  “You know the answer to that question,” Signe said with a brief smile.

  Adesina was completely dumbfounded by this revelation. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it, let alone how to react. Ignoring Adesina’s obvious discomfort, Signe pulled a stack of papers toward her and began glancing through them.

  “Your Shar have all rated you very highly.”

  Adesina knew this. She had always been among the best.

  “Your opponent was not very complimentary of your performance.”

  This didn’t surprise Adesina either. She knew that Basha would do everything in her power to discredit Adesina’s victory.

  “She seemed to think it dishonorable for you to drop from the trees.”

  Adesina made an exasperated noise. “Every fifth year Shi should know to use the environment and every advantage it offers.”

  Signe pushed the papers aside. “What I really want to know is how you think you did.”

  Adesina thought over the previous night carefully. She was dissatisfied with what happened, but for entirely different reasons than Basha. She looked at the face that was so familiar to her and felt that she could speak without restraint. “It was…too easy.”

  Signe raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

  Adesina shrugged uncomfortably. “I was just expecting something more challenging for our final test.”

  Signe’s expression was unreadable. Adesina felt the need to explain herself further, but waited for the Sharifal to speak.

  “A challenge.” Signe mused quietly. She raised her eyes to study Adesina’s face. “Do you think yourself above your training?”

  This question caught Adesina off guard. She answered carefully. “No, but I have not felt truly challenged since my third year.” When Signe did not dispute this statement, Adesina went on boldly. “We both know that I have long been the best among all Shi. I have always had the most potential. That is why you began my training in my fifth year of life rather than my tenth. Yet I am continually placed in the same training program as every other mediocre Shi.”

  Adesina stopped abruptly, afraid that she had overstepped her bounds. It was true that Signe had practically raised her, but she was still the Sharifal. Adesina lowered her eyes respectfully and sat in silence.

  Signe was lost in her thoughts for several moments. When she brought herself out again, it was with some effort. “What do you suggest?”

  This was the part that gave Adesina trouble. She had often thought about her restlessness, but had no idea what changes to suggest. She let her breath out slowly and shook her head. “I do not know, Signe.”

  There was silence for a few minutes while they both thought about the situation before them. Signe clasped her hands on the desk in front of her. “Do you remember the question you always used to ask me when you were a child?”

  The sudden change of subject momentarily confused Adesina. She had to think for a second before replying. “I…would ask you about my father.”

  Although she wasn’t sure why, Adesina had always felt a strong need to find her father. As a child she had strange recurring dreams that urged her to find this man she had never met. These dreams usually consisted of her hurrying through the woods, pursuing a figure that she somehow knew to be her father. The feeling of desperation to catch up to him grew with every step, until she woke up in a cold sweat.

  Sometimes she dreamed of the story she had been told of her mother. Signe once told her about how a beautiful young woman had been found wandering in the woods. It had been a harsh winter, and the woman was clearly reaching the end of her pregnancy. The Shimat took her in and cared for her until she had her baby. Before she died, just minutes after giving birth to Adesina, she said that her husband would come for their daughter.

  But he never did.

  Adesina had always wondered why he never came. Finally, at the age of five, she decided that if he could not find her, then she would find him.

  Signe broke through Adesina’s reverie. “And do you remember what I said?”

  That was much easier to answer. Signe’s words had been a driving force in Adesina’s life. “You said that if I wanted to find my father I would have to train very hard. That only the best of Shimat would have the means of finding him.”

  Signe inclined her head. “Do you feel you have done this?”

  Adesina nodded fervently. She had pushed herself harder than any Shar could have. This driving ambition, along with a great amount of skill, had shot Adesina to the head of her class at a very young age.

  The Sharifal leaned back in her chair, giving Adesina a calculating look. “It has been recommended that your training be specialized.”

  Adesina was astonished. Specializing was an option given to students who had graduated, but Adesina wouldn’t
graduate for another year.

  “Really?”

  Signe’s expression was once again unreadable. “Yes. All of your Shar agree.”

  Adesina furrowed her brow. She was excited, but felt a sudden surge of concern as well. The words of ready acceptance stuck in her throat.

  Signe raised an eyebrow expectantly. “Are you willing to specialize your training?”

  Adesina merely nodded. Signe’s smile was now without humor. “Good.”

  She stood with a small folded piece of paper in her hand. Adesina also got to her feet, her gaze fixed on the paper in Signe’s hand. She had to remind herself not to be so presumptuous as to reach out for it.

  Signe hesitated as she studied the young woman before her. Adesina could not read her expression, but did her best to appear confident. Whatever it was that the Sharifal saw, it seemed to satisfy her. She extended the paper to Adesina, who took it with a sort of reverence.

  “You are excused.”

  Adesina bowed and turned to leave.

  “Adesina.”

  She turned back. “Yes?”

  “Do not prove us wrong.”

  Adesina nodded slowly and went out the door. Breyen did not take note of her as she walked past, nor did the two guards. As she descended the stairs she heard the bell tolling for the evening meal. She unfolded the paper given to her by Signe and read the words carefully.

  They were instructions on where she was to go for her new training, and the passwords necessary to get there. She was also admonished not to delay by going to her quarters for any personal items. This brought a grim smile to Adesina’s face. She had no belongings other than what she was wearing. Adesina put the paper on the first brazier she passed and made sure it burned before moving on.

  Following the instructions given to her, Adesina went deeper into the fortress than she had ever been before. The northwest section of the fortress was off limits to students; and to ensure that no curious student got “lost” and found their way to that area, guards were posted at the door that led to it. The guards eyed her suspiciously, but let her through when she gave them the password.