Never Say Love (Never Say Never #1)
Page 8
She closed her lips around him immediately.
“Eager little thing, aren’t you?” His words were rough, but his touch was gentle as he eased forward. His weight was heavy on her tongue, salt awakening her senses as he eased forward, pulled back, then pushed in just a little more on the next thrust.
“I love how much you want it.” Her heart jumped at the mention of the L-word, even in this context, and then the thought was swept away when he traced a possessive finger over the line of her cheekbone.
The warmth turned into full-blown heat when he caught her chin firmly and held, forcing her to look up at him as best she could from the awkward position.
“That eagerness is only for me. Do you understand?” Her blood was an inferno, firing along her veins as she moaned her assent around him. “Just me. No other man. Ever.”
His words almost sent her over the edge again. He was talking to her like a… like a thing. His plaything. Like he’d take everything she gave him, then demand more. A tiny flicker of thought tried to surface, insisting that she shouldn’t enjoy this. Shouldn’t be dripping wet from being restrained and told what to do.
But she did. Oh, she did. And he was absolutely right—it was all for him.
“You feel so good around me, Blondie.” Nate pushed forward again. This time his length tapped against the back of her throat. She swallowed, certain that she was about to gag, but then he slid home.
Triumph surged through her when a raw groan ripped from his throat.
“So tight. So hot.” He pulled back just a fraction, then pushed forward again. Overwhelmed with sensation as she was, she noted that he treated her with care, when he could easily have made this very uncomfortable for her.
She swallowed, pleasure suffusing her at, well, at bringing him pleasure.
“Ellie!” The hands stroking over her face tightened, as though he was about to lose control, and then he pulled right out of her mouth with a wet sound.
“What’s wrong?” She swallowed, running her tongue over her dry lips to dampen them. Her voice was raw. Struggling to see his face, she slid back on the bed, rolled to her side. “What did I do?”
“I should spank you again for assuming that you did something wrong.”
She caught just the quickest glimpse of his face, just enough to discern a ferocious hunger. Then he grabbed her around the waist, adjusting her so that her head was on the pillows at the head of the bed, her body laid out before him.
Nate crawled onto the mattress after her, his rigid cock trailing along her inner thigh before settling against the tender flesh between her legs.
“I should spank you, but I can’t right now. I need you, Ellie. I’ve needed you for so long. And I wanted to be inside of you when you make me come for the first time.” Nate reached for a foil packet that he’d set on the bedside table sometime after they’d entered the room.
Crimson warning lights flashed across the front of Ellie’s brain. She blinked, need fogging her senses as she tried not to let the tidal wave of emotions caused by his words fill up the tunnel that he’d just dug in her heart.
“Nate. I…” She planned to say something flippant, something that would help to transform the intensity of the moment back into just plain old lust and heat.
But then she heard the crinkle of foil, and his sheathed erection was pushing inside of her, and she couldn’t think at all.
“Oh God.” Ellie gasped at the intrusion. Her flesh was so swollen with arousal that the sweet invasion was overwhelming. She dug her heels into the bed, arching her hips for more and at the same time crying out because she wasn’t sure he was going to fit.
“Easy, Blondie.” As he had with her mouth, Nate pulled back, giving her a moment to recover before he continued forward. “You can take me. And it’s going to feel so good.”
She widened her parted legs, wanting nothing less than all of him. Frustration caused her to grit her teeth and wiggle her hips, and then he pressed in the last delicious inch. Finally home, Nate buried his face into her neck and stilled.
“That feels amazing.” Ellie’s whisper broke the silence.
He lifted his head. She looked into Nate’s eyes, and what she saw there made her heart pulse stutter. Pools of stormy gray, with flecks of amber that she’d never noticed before… and they were focused on her like she was the only person in existence.
His breath misted over her cheek as he braced himself on one arm, then tangled his other hand in her hair. “Ellie.”
His stare searched her face, and her belly did a slow roll.
Before she could catch her breath, he rolled his hips, and the emotion combined with the sweet friction of him inside of her had her closing her eyes against the onslaught.
“No. Open your eyes.” The hand in her hair tugged, awakening the nerve endings along her scalp and sending a rush of heat between her legs. She arched against him in response, and the pressure on her clit made her cry out.
“That’s right. Keep your eyes on me while I fuck you.” His voice burnt her senses like a shot of whiskey. “I want you to remember who it is that’s making you feel this way.”
He slid out, then in, the planes of his taut belly rubbing against her clit with every thrust, and she felt herself rocketing toward that peak again, the one she’d been denied just minutes before. One thought rose out of the spiraling bliss, and she gasped it out, her fingers digging into his biceps as he began to move faster, taking her hard.
“And what about you?” The silver of his piercing winked in the low light, and her left hand slid over his chest to rub over the fascinating detail again. When she made contact, he stiffened, then began to move inside of her harder and faster, which made it seem all the more important that she got her answer right away. “Will you remember that it was me who made you feel this way?”
She cringed as soon as the words left her lips, but still, she wouldn’t have taken them back. Nate didn’t pause, just dipped his head to nip at the cord in her neck, then trailed his tongue up to dip into her ear.
“I’m definitely going to spank you later for all of this self-doubt.” He scraped his teeth over the tender lobe, and when she arched and shivered, he used the hand in her hair to force her to look back into his eyes.
“But for now, listen up.” He braced his weight on one hand as he began to move harder and faster, then harder and faster still. She found her legs curving around him to hold him to her even more tightly, her stare riveted to his own.
“I already told you, I’ve wanted this for longer than I’ll ever admit.” Harder. Faster. Their hips smacked together, their skin slapping with a sound that shouldn’t have been sexy and yet was the most erotic thing that Ellie had ever heard. “It’s not possible to forget who is making me feel this way, because I’ve never felt this way before.”
Oh, shit. Ellie’s heart trembled, the feelings that accompanied her crush multiplying and then pulling her under. She fought to put up reinforcements, to rebuild the walls that would keep her safe from inevitable heartache, but the tidal wave of sensation rising from her core and spreading to the very tips of her fingers was all-consuming, lighting everything in its path to flame.
“Nate!” His name fell from her lips as the largest, most intense release of her life pulled her under, stealing her breath, coloring her vision. Her cries echoed around the room as he continued to fill her, their heat sealing them together until it was hard to tell where he ended and she began.
As if from a distance, she felt Nate’s hard muscles draw tight, heard his pained groan. He pulsed inside of her, his fingers digging into her scalp, his face buried against her neck as he emptied himself inside of her.
It could have been seconds, or it could have been a half hour before Ellie felt her senses returning to her. She was lying on her side, half draped over Nate’s chest, his pulse thundering beneath her fingertips.
She wanted to curl into him and never let go. And the realization had her heart pounding all over again. She was
in deep trouble. She’d tried so hard to remember that, even though they were friends, this was just sex to Nate. But she knew that she’d passed the point of no return—her feelings were well and truly engaged.
God, how could she possibly keep sex and the emotion separate when they’d just done… that?
And that was another matter entirely. She’d always fancied herself a vanilla kind of girl, but being held down, spanked, and taken hard had been the hottest experience of her life. She’d always prided herself on being in control—how could she possibly enjoy giving it up?
Yes, she was in deep.
She needed to get out of this bed. Maybe even out of this room. Needed to get some air, some space, before she lost herself altogether.
Chapter Seven
Complete satisfaction and terror were tightly entwined in Nate’s gut, and they didn’t seem interested in letting go anytime soon.
Nate wasn’t ashamed to admit that he’d probably earned his playboy reputation. Still, he’d never had sex that was even remotely comparable to what he’d just shared with Ellie. It had been far more than the fulfilment of a long-held desire—in the space of an evening, she’d somehow managed to work her way right inside him.
He looked down at the top of her golden head as she shifted restlessly in his arms, rolling his eyes at himself. The fireworks might have only been discharged tonight, but they’d been set to explode for years.
Ellie stirred in his arms again, and he caught a glimpse of her face. The panic that he saw made his gut clench.
“Hey. What’s going on?” Adjusting his position on the bed, he pulled himself to a sitting position and tried to wrap his arms around her, but she danced just out of his reach and shimmied to the edge of the bed.
“Nothing. I just… I’m going to go grab a shower.” She looked around, nerves apparent in every movement, before she tugged on the loosened sheet, wrapping it around her body.
The symbolism couldn’t have been more readily apparent—she was shielding herself, constructing a barrier. But why?
Guilt flamed as a possibility occurred to him. Ellie wasn’t like most of the women he took to bed, and right now he couldn’t be happier about that. But had he been so wrapped up in finally having her in his arms that he’d missed some signal? Had he pushed her too hard, too fast, and not realized that it was too much?
“Talk to me, Ellie.” Catching the edge of her sheet in his fist, he held tight when she tried to stand. She huffed out a breath of exasperation, glaring at him over her shoulder.
He knew her well enough to note the other emotions swirling in her eyes at the same time.
“I’m fine, Nate.” She tugged the sheet up, covering her cleavage. “I just need a few minutes to myself, okay?”
“No.” Not caring about his own nakedness, he slid across the bed to seat himself beside her. Catching her chin in his hand, he gently tilted her head so that she looked him right in the eyes. “I need to know what just happened. I thought you were right there with me. Was I wrong?”
A battle raged over her face, and his body tightened when he thought she would insist on staying mute. Finally she heaved a great sigh, tension evident in the stiff lines of her shoulders.
“Look. I just… I’ve always known who I am. I’m the good girl, the one with everything together. The one in control.” Her lips were pinched into a thin line when she looked right at him. “I can’t reconcile that with what we just did. How can I like you holding me down and telling me what to do? That’s… isn’t that against everything I believe in?”
He studied the worry in her face, which should have lessened after admitting her fears. She obviously wasn’t telling him everything, but then, after having sex just once, he didn’t really have the right to demand access to all of her innermost thoughts. They’d tackle what was laid out in front of them first, then.
“Do you think less of me because I like to be in control?” He made sure that his voice was mild, accompanied by a brush of his knuckles over her cheek, a gesture meant to calm.
Ellie blinked, clearly startled. “What? No, of course not. Why would I think that?”
“Then why would you think less of yourself for being on the other side?” He stroked his fingers through her hair, and she visibly relaxed under his touch, though the shadows in her eyes remained.
“I don’t understand.”
“What we do in the bedroom, what we crave, it’s not the entirety of who we are.” It wasn’t the first time that he’d had this conversation, but this time it was more important than ever that he get his point across. “Enjoying being held down and spanked doesn’t have any bearing on any other aspect of your life, not unless you want it to.”
She studied him with those wide eyes, and he found himself again missing her glasses, which seemed an integral part of her. She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again.
“Ask whatever you want.”
She shifted and the sheet fell to her waist, but he forced himself to keep his eyes on her face, for the time being at least.
“I don’t know if this is something I’ll want to do forever.” She swallowed thickly, and he found himself wanting to trail kisses down the slender column of her throat. “I think it’s something I want because… because it’s you.”
And that sound was his ego swelling. He had to fight the urge to puff out his chest.
Until her next words, anyway.
“So maybe it would be easier for me to think of it that way for now. I don’t usually have flings with men, either. So when I… when I go back to my real life, then I can decide if this is what I want all the time.”
She was clearly sorting through her feelings, and that was what he’d wanted her to do. But her words were a scalding hot knife to his soul.
Back to her real life. The life that she had without him. Because she thought he was nothing more than the playboy friend of her brother, the guy who was fun to play with but not to keep.
The notion didn’t sit well, but now was not the time to push, not when her emotions were so close to the surface.
“Let’s order some food.” Changing the subject abruptly, he stood and crossed the room to where the ancient corded phone sat beside the television. He didn’t miss the way her eyes tracked his movements.
There was hope. At least, he hoped there was hope.
“We had dinner already.” Her voice was cranky, and at this he wanted to smile.
While he sure didn’t want to hurt her, he didn’t mind getting under her skin.
“I’m not hungry,” she said.
“You’re forgetting how long I’ve known you.” Absently he flipped through the dog-eared ‘locals guide’, which contained a few equally worn takeout menus. He pulled out one for a steakhouse that had been around for as long as he could remember. “I’ve seen you eat an entire pepperoni pizza.”
“Wow, that makes me feel sexy.” She glared at him, her cheeks flushing crimson. “Why would you say that?”
“Are you kidding me?” He tossed the menu onto the bed, then dipped his head and kissed her, brushing his tongue over the seam of her lips until she emitted a small moan. “Do you know what a turnoff it is to take a woman to dinner and be forced to watch her pick at a salad with little pieces of chopped up chicken on it?”
“I like salad with chicken.” She scowled, but when he settled his hands onto her shoulders and started to rub she seemed to relax a fraction.
“Do you know what the real meaning of the word sensual is?” Nate let his hands trace down Ellie’s upper arms, stroking feather-light touches over the tops of her breasts, savoring the way her breath hitched. “It means of the senses. All senses. And watching a woman take sensual pleasure in a decent damn meal awakens all kinds of other needs for me.”
“I—oh.” Ellie arched into his touch. He circled her rosy nipples once, then drew his hands back up to her shoulders. She moaned with disappointment when he removed his touch completely, tossing the menu into her lap.
“Might I remind you, I have to fit into a bridesmaid’s dress in two days.” Under his stare she shifted restlessly, her breath coming faster, her pulse beating like a hummingbird’s wings at the base of her throat.
Watching the way that she reacted just to his stare had his own arousal kicking in, and he felt his cock start to rise.
“Well, if it eases your worries at all…” Lazily, he took himself in his hand and pumped slowly, the simmering heat in Ellie’s eyes engorging the flesh. “You’ll only be wearing that dress until I can get you out of it.”
“What?” she asked.
Her stare fastened on the slide of his hand on his own cock. That, more than the touch itself, had his own need coalescing, his pulse speeding, the blood pumping through his veins.
“I mean… I thought…”
Yeah, he knew what she thought… she thought that they were already done, that by tomorrow he’d have moved on to a new conquest.
He had news for her. As long as she was willing to be in his bed, in his bed she’d be. Starting now. So he closed the space between them, sweeping the menu onto the floor. Seating himself on the edge of the bed, he pulled her into his lap so that she straddled him.
The sweetness between her legs made contact with his cock and he hissed aloud. Fuck, but she was already wet, ready for him.
Sweeping her hair to one side, he dipped his head and licked the soft skin of her neck. She cried out, her legs clenching around his hips, and he let the sensation take him over.
“I thought you were about to force-feed me.” Ellie gasped as Nate shifted them back on the bed so that he laid full length, her glorious curves on full display on top of him. Clasping her hips in his hands, he rocked her against him and swore out loud as her slick heat slid over him.