All We Know Is Falling: Fall With Me: Volume One

by Nicole Thorn

  Apparently the glass was holding in the blood, because once it was out the wound started gushing.

  “RORY!” My name was called and in less than three seconds, Ethan was beside me. “What happened? Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. Kenna tripped me. I guess I fell on glass.”

  His eyes were huge as he looked at the blood on my leg and what was dripping to the ground. “I’ll help you.”

  Before I could protest, he had me in his arms. When I was lifted up, I saw Hale just behind Ethan. They must have come to school together.

  Ethan brought me to the steps of the school and sat me down. Hale started walking into the building and Ethan yelled at him. “Hey, your friend is hurt,” he gestured to me. “What the Hell are you doing?”

  “Going to class. I suggest you do the same or you’ll be late.”

  Ethan looked baffled. “Are you kidding me? She’s bleeding out. Why don’t you try not being an asshole for five minutes and help her?”

  Hale’s eyes went to the puddle of blood under me, then back in front of him as he walked inside. Ethan mumbled some less than kind things about his brother as he looked me over.

  “Really, I’m fine,” I said. “Don’t be late for class.”

  He rolled his sleeves up and said, “I don’t care about math. And you’re still bleeding.”

  He was right. It was getting slower but it was still bad. The blood soaked into my socks and shorts. Should be fun going through the day with that.

  I took my shoes and socks off so I could throw them away. Before I could, Ethan grabbed the clean one and held it to my leg. “This should help.”

  “I really hate Kenna,” I sighed.

  “She did this?”

  “She tripped me.” I finished cleaning off as much blood as I could and I stood up.

  He looked at the cut on my leg. “I think that’s going to scar. I’m sorry.”

  “I don’t scar easy.” Ever. But I couldn’t tell him that. “I’ll be fine.” It would be mostly healed by the time I got up in the morning. “Sorry about class. You’re going to get in trouble because of me.”

  He scoffed at that. “I don’t care. I couldn’t just leave you bleeding.”

  “Hale could,” my voice was bleak.

  He looked angry. “He shouldn’t have done that.”

  I shrugged. “It’s fine. Why should I care what he does?” I got up and my leg stung. But it was nothing that I couldn’t handle. “I’ll see you later.” We said goodbye and while he went to class, I went to the bathroom.

  I couldn’t go through the day in bloody clothes. So I popped back home and showered the blood off of me before I changed into fresh clothes. I picked a red dress with thin straps. It didn’t quite cover the cut on my leg but it would need to do since I skipped laundry day again. I bandaged my leg and went back to school.

  By the time I got back to school, science was almost over. I’d taken my time because, well, I just don’t care about that class. We had to cut up a fish today and I didn’t really want to participate anyway. I waited in the parking lot until the bell rang.

  I almost didn’t make it to class on time, but I got in right before the bell rang. I nearly ran into Mr. Dixon. He caught me by the shoulders.

  “Watch out,” he smiled. “Running late?”

  “Sorry. I got hurt and had to go home real quick,” I lied about staying longer than I needed. “But I’m here and ready to work.”

  “Are you? You seem to be missing something.”

  I didn’t know what he was talking about. So I said, “Huh?”

  “Your backpack.”

  Uh oh. I must have left it in the parking lot when I got hurt. All of my stuff for class was in it. “Can I go look for it? I think I know where it is.”

  He walked to his desk and handed me a pass. “Make it quick.”

  I ran out of the room and to the parking lot. I went back everywhere that I’d been. I found the blood spot where I first fell and I checked under the cars to see if it slid under one. But I found nothing. I checked where Ethan brought me and it was just nowhere to be seen. I was screwed.

  I went back to class empty handed. Mr. Dixon said that since I was so far into my project, I could just sit at my table and ‘reflect on the work.’

  It was a little more than awkward, just sitting there next to Hale. He kept his eyes glued to his book that laid unopened on the table.

  My solution was to mess around on my phone ‘til class was over. The rest of my classes for the day didn’t require my backpack, so at least I was sort of okay. Though I was missing my gym clothes. Maybe I could just sit out for the day.

  I chose to check up on Walter with my free time. He sent me a picture of Bumpkin chewing on someone’s boots. I laughed when I saw it.

  “Whatcha doin’?” I heard from behind me.

  I sighed and turned around. “You already got me hurt today. Can’t you take a day off?”

  She smiled. “Nope. Who’s got you laughing like that? Gotta say, I knew you were desperate, but I wouldn’t have guessed that you’d be screwing someone so soon after Psycho dumped you. Does the new guy mind your mutation?”

  “I’m texting my brother. Not that it’s your business.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Lying? That’s interesting. I know you don’t have a brother.”

  I laughed. She had no idea how many brothers I really had. “I do have a brother. You know it’s actually possible to have men in your life that you’re not fucking, right?”

  She narrowed her eyes at me. “I know all about that motley crew of rejects you call a family. My older brother knew your sister when she was in high school. Maybe you oughta be judging that whore on who she sleeps with.”

  “Sister?” I heard Hale mumble to himself. But I was too distracted to care.

  I was too angry to correct her with the new story of her being my aunt. Some people, only the ones who messed with me through out the years, knew about Hadley. But they didn’t pay attention to when I started calling her my aunt. They care enough to try and hurt me. But not enough to pay attention. “Don’t say a goddamm word about Hadley. If she knew a thing about what you do, I promise you that she wouldn’t have the restraint I have.”

  The joy in her face didn’t waver. “And your disgusting dad. What kind of a pig marries someone so young? Worse, how gross is your mom for marrying him? I guess whore just runs in your family. I bet your dad swallowed a handful of pills just to get away from you all.”

  Hale stood up and turned to her. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he was looking to do damage. But he didn’t get the chance.

  Mr. Dixon stormed over to her and slapped down a red piece of paper. “I’ve got this under control, Mr. Wyatt. Sit down.” He put his hand on Hale’s shoulder and forced him down onto his seat. Then he turned to Kenna. “You know that bullying is grounds for expulsion?”

  She looked angry. “What about the shit she was saying to me?”

  He glanced back at me. I couldn’t muster up a facial expression. I was thinking about my dad.

  “I think what she said was nothing compared to what I’ve heard you say to her over the years. And I know miss Flynn well enough to know that if you leave her be, she doesn’t attack unprovoked. Take this note,” he pointed to the red paper, “and go to the office. You’re going to have a little talk with the principal. Don’t think about leaving. I’m going to call him as soon as you leave this room.”

  She opened her mouth to protest, but he crossed his arms and it silenced her. She grabbed her stuff, staring me down the whole time. Then she stormed out of the room.

  “Are you alright, Aurora?” Mr. Dixon asked.

  I looked up at him. “I’m fine.”

  He cleared his throat. “About your father…he was—”

  “I know what people thought of my mom and dad. And I don’t care. They don’t know anything about us.”

  “Aurora—” I didn’t stay in the room long enough to hear the rest of what h
e had to say.

  When I got to the hall, I had no clue what I was doing. I just needed to not be there anymore. Today was the day from Hell and I just wanted to go home. But that wouldn’t solve anything. Kenna would win if I just rolled over and died. I needed to take every hit and come back smiling.

  I started walking, having no clue where I was going.

  It wasn’t true. I knew it wasn’t. Mom and Dad loved each other more than anything. Everyone saw what they wanted to see. An old man married to a woman that looked less than half his age. But it wasn’t the case. I knew that. No one else did. And I couldn’t explain it to anyone. I had to deal with the judgmental eyes from everyone around me.

  I wish I could be more like Hadley. She didn’t give a damn about anything that people thought about her. She lived how she wanted to and never thought twice about it.

  But I wasn’t her. I was insecure—like Hale said. I couldn’t just let myself be happy and forget everything else. I was trapped in my own head.

  When I got to the other side of the school I was hardly even aware. I only snapped to attention when I heard my name.

  “Aurora?” It was Dottie. She looked surprised to see me. I guess she should be. I wasn’t where I was supposed to be.

  She was staring at me with a handful of papers. “Are you okay? You look a little spacey?”

  I blinked. “Um. I’m okay. What are you doing?”

  She smiled and held up the papers. “I’m a T.A. I was sent to make copies. You?”

  I shuffled on my feet. “I kinda took off in the middle of class. Someone was…saying some things and I just needed to get out of there.”

  “Aww,” she rushed me and held me tightly. “What happened?”

  I wasn’t a hugger, so I was mildly alarmed by the sudden affection. But I didn’t want to offend her, so I hugged back. “It was Kenna. You know her?”

  She moved back from me. “Yeah. She’s a little mean.”

  I laughed. “A little…”

  “What did she say that upset you so much?”

  I looked at the floor. “Stuff about my family. My dad.”

  “Oh. I’m sorry. Just ignore her. It’ll take away the power. She’s nothing without an audience.”

  She might have a point. But it was a lot harder to ignore that girl that she might think. It was like her mission in life was to torture me.

  “I’ve gotta go,” she said. “But I hope you feel better,” she started walking fast down the hall before she turned in a different direction.

  The bell rang a few minutes later and the hall flooded with students. I felt surrounded. I quickly made my way out of the halls and headed for the lunch room.

  Thankfully my wallet wasn’t in my backpack, so I could get lunch. It was pizza day again and I felt like I had a new reason for living. And as if The Powers That Be were on my side, there was also cake. I took three pieces and paid for my food. The lunch lady judged me with her eyes over the cake but I ignored her and took two milks.

  I sat at my table and set my phone next to my tray, fully prepared to play games through the class. As my game was loading, I heard a tray hit the table. And another.

  I looked up and wanted to run. Dottie and Hale were sitting down.

  “What are you doing?” I asked Hale.

  Dottie answered, “You sit here all alone every day and I thought that maybe you’d like company.”

  “I’m fine.”

  She smiled and patted my arm. “It’s okay. You don’t have to lie. You’re allowed to feel lonely.”

  “Thanks,” I said in a flat voice. “But I’m not lonely. I like being alone.” Less people hurt you that way.

  “Let’s go then,” Hale said, grabbing his tray.

  Dottie put her hand on his and I wanted to cut it off. “Sweetie, we talked about this.”

  He eyed her but settled down.

  The tension in my stomach grew when I saw her hand hesitate to leave his. She lingered with familiarity that I didn’t want to see. I thought Kenna was just messing with me earlier, but it was clear that she wasn’t. Hale moved on. Quickly. And with someone he knew I had issues with.

  “Oh my gosh,” Dottie caught sight of my leg. “What happened to you? That cut looks deep.”

  “I just fell. It’s not that bad.”

  She took it upon herself to pull the bandage back after she pushed my skirt up. “You need stitches.”

  “No I don’t,” I yanked my dress back down. I didn’t need to give these kids a free show.

  “But it’ll never heal right if you don’t take care of it.”

  “I heal quick, Dottie.”

  She smiled a little. “Me too. But someone like you should go get that taken care of. I’d bring you myself, but I’m leaving early today.”

  “Thanks,” I opened my chocolate milk. “But really, I’m fine.”

  I ate and hoped that she would stop talking to me all together. I don’t know what I did to deserve this, but I regret it. I didn’t want to sit with Hale and his new girlfriend.

  “How are your mom and sister doing?” Dottie asked with that award winning smile.

  “There’s that word again. Sister,” Hale said. “Why does everyone think Hadley is your sister?”

  Dottie laughed. “Of course Hadley is her sister. Sort of. She’s adopted.” Thanks so much…

  “Sort of?” I tried to hold my anger back. As if being adopted would make her less family than she was.

  “You know what I mean.”

  “Yeah,” I stabbed at my food. “I guess I do.”

  “She’s your sister?”

  I looked at Hale. “It’s none of your business. Why would you even care?”

  I couldn’t place the look on his face. “I don’t care. I was just curious.”

  “Well in that case why don’t I just tell you everything?” I said with animosity. “I mean, why not? You’ve had your share of confessions. What do you think? Should I take a turn?”

  He sat back in his chair and didn’t say a word.

  Dottie acted like she didn’t hear a word. Her face was blank and confused. “I guess I could see how people wouldn’t know she was your sister. She looks like she’s your mom’s age.” She laughed. “And your mom only looks a little older than you. She never seems to change.”

  “Good skin cream,” I shoved a piece of cake in my mouth.

  She continued. “And you don’t even look like her.”

  “I look like my father.” Accept the eyes. I must have gotten those from my biological mother.

  “Oh! I forgot, your dad wasn’t your dad. Have you seen your real one around lately?”

  I took a deep breath and decided not to hit her for saying Franklin wasn’t my real dad. “Not for a while.” Not since he took me and my other siblings to Kansas.

  “That’s too bad.”

  “Not really.”

  She looked away awkwardly and started back on her food. I went back to the cake and tried to remember that one day this wouldn’t matter. I’d be okay. Jenna was right. I wouldn’t remember this day. These people. They would be dust and I wouldn’t even remember them. Hale.

  I looked at him while he wasn’t paying attention. I thought about how this was just a dot on my timeline. Jenna meant for the words to comfort me. But the idea of me not remembering this boy—as much as he hurt me—was agony. I wouldn’t miss who he was now. But I would miss the boy that took me on my first date. Who gave me his chocolate milk. The first boy to ever want me, even with everything that was wrong with me.

  Lunch ended and I almost cried with relief. I said goodbye to Dottie and almost ran to Art.

  The class passed quickly. It was a free day and I managed to finish up my figures for the project. All I needed to do now was the ship. Then I was totally free.

  When the bell rang I counted the minutes to the end of the day. I planned on eating a whole pint of ice cream and taking a nap. All I had was Friday to get through and I was in the clear. Plus, it was parent day.
So I didn’t have regular classes.

  I followed behind a group of girls that were headed into the locker room. They were chattering about the upcoming weekend and some carnival in town for Halloween. I wasn’t interested.

  When I turned the corner, I spotted my backpack sitting on the floor by my locker. Someone must have found it and knew it was mine. I was the only senior who chose to rock a Zelda backpack.

  I picked it up and opened it to get my clothes for class. The book I found inside threw me off. I thought for a second that it wasn’t my backpack, but my name was written on the inside with marker. Right where my dad put it.

  I pulled the scrapbook out and froze when I opened it. The first page had a collage of my mother. There were a dozen or so pictures of her pasted onto construction paper. There were pictures of her out at the store, some in the house with her cooking. They looked like they were taken through a window. But the ones of her sleeping…they looked like they were taken inside of her room.

  I was terrified, but I kept looking through the book. The next page was Hadley, much the same. There was one of her being put in the back of a police car the night before I had to get her from the holding cell.

  Each page was more frightening than the next. There were pages of pictures, schedules for all of us, things we threw away. I couldn’t understand why someone would do this.

  Then I got to the rest of the book. More than half of it was just me. There were sketches, photos. I found a piece of one of my shirts glues inside. Who ever did this was in my bedroom. They took things from me and gave them back to scare me. I didn’t even make it to the last page.

  I was dizzy as I took the book into the gym. I needed help and I didn’t know where to get it. So I went to the closest source I could find. Jenna.

  I went into the gym and I heard her voice. “I think you’re going about this the worst way you possibly can. I get what you’re doing. But you’re causing more harm than good. For the both of you.”

  My eyes went around the room until I spotted her. She was standing with Hale by the bleachers. I didn’t want to be near him, but I didn’t have a choice.

  I walked over to Jenna and handed her the scrapbook. She smiled. “A present?” Her smile turned to a look of fear. “Aurora, why are you shaking?”