by Susan Wiggs
“Come to the city,” he said when she answered her phone. “We’ll go to dinner and a movie.”
“I beg your pardon.”
“I said—”
“I heard what you said. Is this your way of asking me out?”
“That’s right.”
“I didn’t hear any asking.”
Oh. “Okay, I’ll call you back.”
He turned off his phone and waited a couple of minutes. Then he called her back.
“Is this Faith McCallum?” he asked.
“Speaking.” There was the sound of a smile in her voice.
“Faith, it’s Mason. I was wondering, would you like to go to dinner and a movie with me in the city on Friday night?”
“That sounds fun.”
Yes.
“I can’t, though. I have plans.”
Damn. Was she seeing that guy again? Another guy? “How about Saturday?” he suggested.
“I can make that work,” she said.
* * *
Faith twisted her hands together and took a deep breath, certain she was about to be fired. Alice had that dragon lady look on her face, the one she wielded like a hammer. And once Alice fired her, everything else was going to collapse like a house of cards. She’d be back to square one with the girls—homeless, searching for a way to make a living. And now it would be worse, because—
“Let me be sure I understand,” Alice said in a chilly voice. “You say you intend to go to the city for a date with my son. An overnight date.”
“Yes.” Faith refused to apologize. She wanted this. Wanting something just for herself was a rare sensation, and she intended to pursue it. Empowered by certainty, she faced Alice head-on. “I realize it could be problematic, me going out with my employer’s son.”
She had discussed the situation at length with her friend Kim. And Kim, like the good friend she was, had offered nothing but support. “The heart wants what it wants,” she’d told Faith. “Everything else will fall into place.”
Or not, thought Faith, regarding Alice. On the carpet beside her, Bella sat at attention, awaiting orders. To Faith, the dog looked every bit as judgmental as her owner.
“Problematic,” Alice echoed. “And why would you say that?”
“Because you might regard it as crossing a line,” Faith said. “And I wouldn’t blame you.”
“You have no idea what I think,” Alice said.
“Fine, then why don’t you enlighten me?” Faith just wanted to get the conversation over with.
“I think it’s about bloody time, that’s what I think,” Alice stated. “I’ve watched you and Mason behaving like those little bar magnets, getting close and then breaking apart. I’m glad you’re finally going to do something about it.”
Faith blinked at her. “Then you don’t have a problem with this.”
“It’s a marvelous idea. I told you that day on the ski slope that I was in favor of it.” Alice glided toward her dressing room, with its racks and shelves displaying her clothes like apparel in a boutique. Bella trotted along, eager to please. “I’m opening the vault to you,” she said. “Let’s figure out what you’re going to wear.”
“It’s just dinner and a movie,” Faith said, feeling giddy with relief.
“In New York. With my son. Take down that little black dress.”
“I’m seeing four little black dresses.”
“The one from Celine. I bought it on impulse, but it’s a bit young for me and I never wore it. So many of these things are from my former life. I don’t know why I kept them.” Her smile was wistful. “Or maybe I do—finally. We’re lucky to wear almost the same size.”
Faith held the elegant dress against her, a silky whisper of pure luxury. “I can’t.”
“Don’t start with that. It’s tedious. And borrow my Missoni coat. It’s chilly in the evenings, still. Grab those shoes over there.” Bella trotted over, nudging each shoe with her nose until Alice rewarded her with a “Yes, good dog.”
Faith picked up the glossy, red-soled pump.
“Perfect,” said Alice. “Wear those.”
“I couldn’t,” Faith said, noting that they looked brand-new.
“You can, and you will,” said Alice. “You think I have any use for them?”
* * *
Mason was ridiculously nervous about the date. He wanted to impress her. He wanted to start something with her. He wanted it to go well.
He had the cleaning lady scrub every square inch of the apartment and bring in some fresh flowers and candles, because at the end of the date, he intended to bring Faith here and make such sweet love to her that she’d never want to leave.
He met her at the station, and they took a taxi to the theater. They made small talk in the cab—the chilly night, whether to go for Italian or Thai or some buzzy new restaurant they’d read about. She balked when they got out of the cab and entered an invitation-only area cordoned off by velvet ropes. “What’s going on?”
“Dinner and a movie,” he said. “Actually, movie first and then dinner.”
She tilted back her head to check out the marquee. “Wait a second,” she said. “This is your idea of dinner and a movie?”
“Yes. You said you were a fan of Bill Hader.”
“You have a good memory.”
It had nothing to do with his memory. It had to do with the fact that he couldn’t stop thinking about her. “This is the world premiere of his new movie. One of my clients is a producer, and he got the tickets. He’s going to be here tonight.”
“Your client?”
“Bill Hader.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Nope. You’ll see. They’ll introduce him at the start of the movie. Oh, and over here...” He took her hand and led her through the jostling crowd. “Red carpet,” he said.
“What?”
“We’re walking the red carpet. Brace yourself.”
“Forget it.” She dug in her heels.
“Too late.” He towed her along through a lightning storm of camera flashes. They stopped together at a backdrop screen covered in the sponsors’ logos. He slid his arm around her waist and hugged her in close while more cameras went off.
She gasped and then laughed aloud. “Oh, my God. Did the paparazzi just take our picture?”
“They must think we’re VIPs.”
The movie was good—definitely good enough for dinner conversation afterward. He took her to Butter, because it was quiet and cave-like and romantic, and the maître d’ could always find a table for Mason.
“You went to a lot of trouble,” she said, resting her chin in her hand as she looked across the table at him. “I really appreciate it.”
“It wasn’t trouble. I want to show you a good time. It’s great to see you relaxing and having fun.”
“I always have fun.”
“But you never let somebody else take care of you instead of always looking after others.” He signaled for the check, and they walked back to his apartment. It was a cold, clear night, and despite the rushing crowds, it felt as though they were the only people in the city.
“If you’re looking to impress me, it’s working,” she said with a smile. Her eyes grew wide as she surveyed the foyer of his building and then his apartment. “This is gorgeous. And your idea of dinner and a movie exceeds all expectations.”
When he took her coat, he stood behind her and let his hands linger on her shoulders. Bending his head, he inhaled the scent of her hair, and the warmth of her skin wafted to him.
“What is it that we’re doing, Mason?” she asked with her characteristic directness.
“I’m courting you. I’m trying to win your heart by showing you a good time.”
“You show
ed me a good time. No, it was a great time. But that’s not the way to win my heart,” she said.
Damn. Really? “Then how do you suppose I go about it?”
“You don’t win a woman’s heart by showing her a good time,” she patiently explained. “You do it by showing her who you are.”
Oh. New plan.
“That’s what I’m trying to do right now.” He turned her in his arms and kissed her, because he would rather kiss than talk. She made a sound, something between a sigh and a moan, and her eagerness was a huge turn-on.
“Suppose we go to the bedroom.”
“That sounds like an excellent idea.”
Straightforward. He loved that about her, he thought as he showed her the way to the bedroom.
“The first time I saw you in a bathing suit, I got excited,” he said, reaching behind her to unzip her dress.
“Really?”
“Yep. I wanted to touch you here...” His finger lightly ran along the curve of her waist and over her hip. “And here.” He found a soft place with his lips. “And here...” He laid her back on the bed and took off his shirt.
A gasp escaped her, and then she stopped and pushed back against the pillows. “Wait, you’re talking about the first time you saw me in a swimsuit? Your mom’s first swim in the lake?”
“Yes. I’m getting excited again, thinking about your legs.” His hand traveled along her thigh to her knee.
“So excited that you went back to Regina and set a date for the wedding,” she said. “I swear, Mason, I don’t get how your mind works.”
“I was... Shit. Confused, and I know that’s no excuse. But I’d been going down this road with Reg. I was committed. I wanted to make it work. I kept trying to shoehorn myself into a relationship because it seemed right.” He moved over her, pressing her wrists against the mattress. “But it never felt right. It never felt like this.”
He kissed her, and they didn’t talk anymore for a long time.
She fell asleep with her head tucked against his shoulder, and when he felt the whisper of her breath on his bare skin, he knew a moment of such exquisite happiness that it made his heart soar.
* * *
In the morning, Mason woke up smiling. He checked his messages and found his inbox full of notes about last night. “Check it out,” he said, turning the screen of his phone toward Faith. “We’re in Time Out New York.”
Apparently, it was a gossip website. Their picture was posted in an article about the movie premiere. The caption read, “Finance magnate Mason Bellamy and his new squeeze.”
“I’m a magnate. How about that?”
“And I’m a squeeze. A new one.”
“I like squeezing you. In fact...”
“Hey.”
He took her hand and kissed it. “That was really nice last night. And I’m not talking about the movie premiere.”
“Best date I’ve had in years, by a mile. Maybe the best date ever.”
But... He heard the silent but. What did she need from him? He knew she needed more. He knew how to show a girl a good time, but in all honesty, he realized much of it was artifice, pretending, just skimming the surface.
From the start, Faith had always made it clear that she valued honesty, responsibility, doing for others.
This is who I am, he thought. What if it’s not enough for her? “Tell me about your husband,” he said. Damn. Had he really just said that?
“Dennis? What is there to say about Dennis? He was my whole world, practically from the first moment I met him. Dennis was...ah, where do I start? He saved me. My mother died, and I was completely alone, and he came riding into my life on a motorcycle, and the world seemed to change color before my eyes. We were so young, it’s incredible that we survived each other. It was one of those rare pairings that just worked, and we didn’t question it. He wasn’t perfect. He was reckless and not much of a planner. He forgot things, including his meds. He put things off, and he was terrible with money. But he gave me his heart, and he took care of mine. And when he left this world, my heart went with him.”
She leaned back against the bank of pillows, looking tousled and beautiful and sad. “Simple as that,” she said. “The only thing that kept me hanging on was the girls. For their sake, I put myself back together and carried on.”
And there it was, Mason realized. It didn’t matter who he was, or what he said, or what he promised. She had not—and might never—let go of her late husband.
He couldn’t compete with a ghost.
* * *
Faith boarded the morning train to Avalon alone. She’d told Mason she needed time to think. That wasn’t quite true. She knew exactly what she thought. She knew exactly what was happening—she was falling into a love she’d never felt before.
This overwhelming feeling was different from her love for Dennis. That had been woven of youthful hopes and dreams, the shared bond of parenthood. But this. This thing with Mason Bellamy... The emotions were so intense that she was afraid to let them overtake her, because she didn’t want to lose this crazy, heady euphoria that infused her like a drug. It was made of a kind of passion and joy so fierce that it felt impossible. And that was a problem, because it was impossible. She couldn’t imagine a way for it to end well.
Faith knew what she had to do. She had to shut down the sweet insanity before any real damage was done. It was the right thing to do. Back in Avalon, there was work to be done, two girls who needed her.
Not to mention Alice.
The moment she walked through the door, Alice glided toward her. These days she had such good control of her right hand and fingers that she no longer needed the breath control mechanism. “Well?” she asked bluntly.
Faith knew exactly what she was asking. Alice had survived far too much to put up with mincing words. “I had a lovely time. The movie and dinner were amazing, and Mason was the perfect gentleman.”
“Good Lord, I hope not,” Alice said.
Faith’s blush betrayed her. She tried to hide it by slipping off the borrowed shoes. “Thank you for this outfit. I felt like Cinderella.”
“In case you haven’t noticed,” Alice pointed out, “you are Cinderella.”
“Right. And you’re the fairy godmother. Where are the girls?”
“Ruby is helping Milo at the shelter. Milo has put her on the list for a diabetes alert dog.”
“We can’t aff—”
“Don’t start. If she qualifies, and if they find an appropriate dog, then we’ll find a way.”
“We?” Faith bristled.
“Yes. We. Just like we’ll find a way to help Cara go to college, and then medical school, or clown college, or whatever the hell she wants.”
“Alice, I appreciate your interest, and your help. But I’ve been going over the various financial aid packages for college, and they all involve me taking on even more debt. I can’t—”
“Honestly, Faith, you have a habit of taking everything on yourself. Mason will organize the financing for you. He’s very good at it.”
The idea of working with him on some kind of loan made Faith feel slightly nauseous. Sleeping with a guy... An exchange of money... No, thank you.
“I’ll figure something out,” she said. “And I don’t need Mason’s help.”
“That’s true. Faith, you’re as transparent as glass. Why can’t you just let yourself love him?”
“Because I’m scared,” Faith shot back before she could stop herself.
Alice froze. She stared at Faith, looking as though she was about to explode. Then she burst out laughing, long and loud, until she gasped for breath. “Let me get this straight. You lost your mother and your husband, survived God knows what kind of poverty and eviction, raised two extraordinary girls, and you’re telling me you’re afraid of falling
in love?”
“I’m glad you’re amused,” Faith said quietly. “And I’m not afraid of falling in love. I’m afraid of falling out of love.”
“Trust me, it’s not so bad.” Alice made herself laugh again. “Come on. Let’s go get a cup of Wayan’s special coffee.”
They went together to the kitchen.
“Clown college?” Faith asked.
“Just a suggestion.”
27
An early heat wave came over the city, and Mason couldn’t wait to get away. He craved the cool breezes of Willow Lake, and as soon as he was able to wrap up his business for the week, he headed upstate to Avalon. When he arrived, the house was quiet. Phil said his mother and Rick had taken the girls bowling.
“My mom went bowling?”
Phil smiled. “She probably just went to observe. And pass judgment.”
“Did Faith go with them?”
“I don’t think so.”
He found her in the laundry room, singing along to a White Stripes song on the radio and folding clothes. The room was like an oven, and she’d pinned up her hair and wore a tank top and flip-flops and skimpy shorts. He stood watching her before she noticed him, feeling a warm rush of affection. She was never still. There was always some job to be done, someone who needed to be looked after—her girls, his mom, their laundry, their lives. She was a caregiver, and for Faith, it didn’t seem to be just a job. It was a vocation.
“Boo,” he said.
She jumped, dropping a stack of folded clothes. “You scared me,” she said.
“Well, I shouldn’t. Because I want you to know that I’m not a ghost.”
“I can see that.”
“Can you?”
She bent to pick up the dropped laundry, but he stopped her and kissed her long and deeply. “Faith, I can’t stop thinking about New York.”
She blushed. “It was lovely. Every moment of it.”
“Then why won’t you see me again?”
“Mason, I just don’t see the point. That night was a beautiful fantasy. A brief escape, and I loved it, but it showed me how completely different we are, from two different worlds.”
