by Susan Wiggs
“And that’s a problem?”
“No, but it’s not... I don’t think we should... Mason, you’re getting over a breakup, and I’m just...broken.”
“That’s bullshit,” he said, losing patience. “I’m not buying it. Listen, I’m sorry as hell for what happened to you. I’m sorry the man you loved so deeply is gone. Maybe you’ll never have a love like that again, but he didn’t use up your entire capacity to love. It doesn’t work like that.”
“When did you become the expert?”
“When I heard the things you whispered to me that night. Believe me, Faith, you have untapped reserves of love.”
The blush spread down her neck. “But—”
“Let me finish. I look at you with your daughters, Faith, and I thank God that guy was in the world to give you Cara and Ruby. Now that he’s gone, you don’t get to mourn him the rest of your life. You get to live the rest of your life. You’re not broken. You’ve just put your heart on hold, and I’m telling you, you don’t have to do that anymore.”
She regarded him in stunned silence. At least, she looked stunned. The heat of the day wafted through the window of the laundry room.
“Let’s go for a hike,” he said.
“What?”
“I don’t want to have this conversation in a laundry room.”
“What conversation? Mason—”
“Let’s go.” He didn’t wait for more protests, but took her by the hand and led the way along a trail that followed the lakeshore.
The trail led to the top of the lake, where a series of granite cliffs offered a commanding view of the beautiful landscape.
“How are the girls?” he asked.
“Cara’s been accepted to four colleges. I’m excited for her, but I’m scared to lose her. I’m afraid of letting her down, too. The cost, even with financial aid...”
“She’ll be fine. Give her a chance to work out her own life. You worry too much.”
“It’s the domain of mothers.”
“You’ve been a mother since you were her age.”
“Yeah, it’s weird when I think about it that way. Sometimes I forget what it was like to be a kid, except...” She paused and bit her lip.
“What? What were you going to say?”
“Except when I’m with you.” She offered a brief smile. “I feel like a kid when I’m with you.”
“Hey, that’s a good sign. I almost never see you do anything just for the fun of it.”
“Life is fun enough. I don’t have to do anything in particular to make it more fun.”
“Come on. You don’t think it could be fun to try kiteboarding or go off a high dive?”
“I suppose it would be fun after it was over and I realized I’d survived intact.” She considered him for a moment. “We’re very different, you and I. For me, life is enough. For you, there always has to be something more, something that involves danger and risk.”
“Because it’s fun. You challenge yourself, you push and you break through. When was the last time you took a physical risk that didn’t involve helping someone out or saving a life? When was the last time you took a physical risk just for the hell of it?”
She studied him for a long time. “When was the last time you took an emotional risk?”
He studied her for an even longer time. “When I fell for you,” he said simply, and started walking again. “Let’s go jump off a cliff.”
She stood stock-still, wondering if she was hearing things. “Wait a minute, you fell for me?”
He stopped walking and turned back to her, holding out his hand. “Yeah. It was scary in a weird way. But I like it. I like the feeling of loving you.”
“You’re crazy. You can’t just declare something like this and then make me jump off a cliff.”
“Sure I can. It’s not as dangerous as it looks. My cousins and I used to come up to these cliffs when we were kids,” he said. The stunned expression on her face made him smile. “Listen, everything about my life got better because of you. I used to hold people at arm’s length, but I don’t want to do that anymore. It doesn’t work when it comes to you.”
She took in a breath, a gasp of surprise and pleasure. He knew that sound. He remembered it from that night in New York. And that was the moment he knew he’d won her over.
Still, she balked. “Mason. This is all really sudden.”
“It’s not. When I think back, I realize my heart knew right away. My head took longer to catch on. I think I probably knew when we took a shower together the first day we met. That’ll be a good story to tell our friends, that the first time we met, we took a shower together and then went and got tested for blood and body fluid exposure.”
Her smile wavered. “That was a long time ago.”
“It was. Because there were...complications. Now there aren’t.” He led her to the rocky cliff edge and encompassed the area with a sweep of his arm. His heart was pounding, but his voice was steady, because he’d never been so sure of anything in his life. “That pool down there is called the Devil’s Punchbowl.”
She leaned slightly over the edge. “It’s a long way down.”
“That’s what makes it fun.”
“How can something that scary be fun?”
He smiled, tipping her face up to his. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, and I never want to let you go. Ever.”
Her eyes filled with tears, but she was smiling. “Then there’s good news.”
“Yeah?”
“I feel the same way. With every bit of my heart, I do.”
He’d been waiting forever to hear those words. He turned and cupped her cheek in his hand. “Oh, baby, I hope you mean that.”
“You think I’m kidding? I tried like hell to stop thinking of you, but it didn’t work. You’re all I think about, all I dream about. And it’s kind of a miracle, because I thought... I didn’t think love would happen to me, ever again.”
His heart hammered in his chest. “You thought wrong, Faith. I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.”
She offered a shaky smile. “Okay. But I’m not the only one in this equation. Are you sure you’re ready for an instant family? Two girls who are not always the easiest people in the world to get along with?”
“I’m ready for anything, Faith. I’m so damned ready. I love you, and I love your girls, and our life together is going to be amazing.”
She took a deep breath, and he could see her trembling. She swallowed hard. “I’m scared to jump.”
“And I was scared to fall. But I did it anyway. And I survived. So will you.” And with that, he grabbed her hand, and they jumped together.
Epilogue
The murmur of Pomp and Circumstance drifted through the speakers set up on the lake house lawn, echoing the iconic melody that had accompanied Cara across the stage of Columbia University that morning.
She felt a swelling of pride as she stepped through the French doors and surveyed the picnic area, where her graduation party was about to begin. Mason’s cousin Daisy had volunteered to take pictures of the event, and Zach, a family friend, was making a video. The two of them were pros in the business, so Cara had taken the time to fix her hair and makeup. She’d left her high school steampunk look behind long ago, to the great relief of pretty much everyone who knew her.
No one had noticed her yet, so she paused on the deck to take in the view and savor the moment. A warm breeze stirred the new leaves in the trees and swept shimmers of sunlight over Willow Lake. The air was filled with the scent of freshly cut grass and flowers from the garden Ruby and Alice had planted that first summer. They came back every year.
It was good to be home.
The family was gathering down by the lake at the picnic area. The linens and balloons m
atched Columbia’s signature pale blue color, and the college flag had been hoisted at the end of the dock. Folding chairs were arranged to create an aisle for Cara to reprise her graduation march. It was silly, but the least Cara could do was reenact the ceremonial march for Alice, who had not been able to attend.
After dinner, there would be a bonfire, s’mores and toasts to Cara’s as-yet-undetermined future. Five years ago, if someone had told her she would end up a college graduate with an extended family numbering in the double digits, she would have thought they were high.
And yet here she was, the ink barely dry on her diploma, about to start a new chapter of her life. With so many people surrounding and supported, she was filled with confidence that it would go well.
She didn’t think of the staff as “staff” anymore. Wayan, Banni and Donno, Lena and Phil—the fact that they were all still here had to mean they would be around for the long run. There were worse places to live and work than this gorgeous lakeside property.
Ruby was marching around with exaggerated movements, reenacting the processional. Her dog, a yellow lab named Fisher, obediently trotted at her side. Fisher went everywhere with Ruby. His training as a diabetes alert dog had given Ruby a new sense of freedom and courage. She was going to need it. Cara would not be the one to tell her this, but eighth grade was a bitch.
Cara thought about Milo, who had been so instrumental with both dogs. In order to finance his education, he had enlisted in the National Guard and had ended up in a military working dog detachment. He’d been deployed overseas and she rarely heard from him these days.
“I hope you’re safe, wherever you are,” she whispered under her breath. Then she put her cap and gown back on for photos.
Alice’s dog, Bella, spotted Cara first and gave a yap of greeting. Slowly and with obvious effort, Alice raised her arm in greeting and waved, forming her fingers into an okay sign. The sight of her, using her arm and hand, brought a lump to Cara’s throat. Alice had worked so hard after the surgery.
Rick took hold of Alice’s hand and gave it a kiss. “The guest of honor has arrived.”
“Cara!” Ruby rushed over to the sound system and turned up the volume on Pomp and Circumstance. “We already started the photo shoot. Let’s see you walk the walk!”
With sober dignity and perfect posture, her diploma in hand, Cara matched her pace to the music while Daisy and Zach captured shot after shot.
As she passed by all the smiling faces, Cara thought about her father, who seemed very present in her heart today. You’d love this, Dad, she thought. You’d be so happy for me.
She slowed her pace, letting the wave of emotion flow through her. Her gaze found her mother, dressed to the nines for the occasion, waiting with Mason at the end of the makeshift aisle. Mom looked so pretty and happy these days. Four years ago, she and Mason had gotten married right here in this same spot. Ever since, they’d been living out their happily-ever-after at the lake house.
Cara could still remember the anxious, stressed-out Mom of her childhood—a young widow scrambling to make ends meet. She had made sacrifices Cara was only beginning to understand, somehow making it possible for Cara and Ruby to grow up feeling safe, secure and loved. Those hard years made Mom’s current happiness all the sweeter.
As she reached the end of the aisle and the music swelled, Cara stopped and turned to her mother. She took off her cap and angled the flat top toward the camera, showing the hand-lettered phrase she had written there this morning: Thank you.
* * * * *
Acknowledgments
I am so very grateful for...
My publishing team—Meg Ruley, Annelise Robey of the Jane Rotrosen Agency, Margaret Marbury, Lauren Smulski, Loriana Sacilotto, Craig Swinwood and all the good folks at MIRA Books.
Mindy Anderson, proud owner of the real Bella Ballou, Sam and Rocky. Thank you for your support of PAWS.
The Waterfront Bakery Brain Trust: Elsa, the comma putter-inner. Kate, the comma taker-outer. Sheila, Lois and Anjali—my first readers and best friends.
Cindy Peters, for her social networking savvy, can-do attitude and positive thinking, and Elizabeth Maas, for newsletters and just...everything.
Lori Cross and Jerry Gundersen—my sister and my soul mate. Every book is a challenge to complete, but this one in particular would never have materialized without their love and support during the writing of this novel.
Special thanks to Jim McMahon, a real-life caregiver who gives new meaning to “care” and “giving.”
Keep reading for an excerpt from CANDLELIGHT CHRISTMAS by Susan Wiggs.
“Susan Wiggs paints the details of human relationships with the finesse of a master.”
—Jodi Picoult
Be sure to catch the complete Lakeshore Chronicles series. With unforgettable tales of heartache and hope, love and laughter, #1 New York Times bestselling author Susan Wiggs invites you to stay awhile on the tranquil shores of Willow Lake.
Summer at Willow Lake
The Winter Lodge
Dockside
Snowfall at Willow Lake
Fireside
Lakeshore Christmas
The Summer Hideaway
Marrying Daisy Bellamy
Return to Willow Lake
Candlelight Christmas
“Susan Wiggs writes with bright assurance, humor and compassion.”
—Luanne Rice
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Candlelight Christmas
by Susan Wiggs
Chapter 1
Summer’s End
Logan O’Donnell stood on a platform one hundred feet in the air, preparing to shove his ten-year-old son off the edge. A light breeze shimmered through the canopy of trees, scattering leaves on the forest floor far below. A zip line cable, slender as a thread in a spider’s web, hung between the tree platforms, waiting. Below, Meerskill Falls crashed down a rocky gorge.
“There’s no way I’m going off this.” Logan’s son, Charlie, drew his shoulders up until they practically touched the edge of his helmet.
“Come on,” Logan said. “You told me you’d do it. The other kids had a ball. They’re all waiting for you on the other side, and I heard a rumor about a bag of Cheetos being passed around.”
“I changed my mind.” Charlie set his jaw in a way that was all too familiar to Logan. “No way. No W-A-Y-F.”
Logan knew the shtick, but he went along with it. “There’s no F in way, dude.”
“That’s right. There’s no effin’ way I’m going off this thing.”
“Aw, Charlie. It’s almost like flying. You like to fly, right?” Of course he did. Charlie’s stepfather was a pilot, after all. Logan crushed the thought. There were few things more depressing than thinking about the fact that your kid had a stepfather, even if the stepfather was an okay guy. Fortunately for Charlie, he’d ended up with a good one. But it was still depressing.
Charlie spent every summer with Logan. During the school year, he lived with his mom and stepfather in Oklahoma, a million miles away from Logan’s home in upstate New York. It sucked, living that far from his kid. Being without Charlie was like missing a limb.
When he did have his son with him, Logan tried to make the most of their time together. He planned the entire season around Charlie, and that included working as a volunteer counselor at Camp Kioga, helping out with the summer program for local kids and inner-city kids on scholarship. The zip line over Meer
skill Falls was a new installation, and had already become everyone’s favorite feature. Nearly everyone.
“Hey, it’s the last day of camp. Your last chance to try the zip line.”
Charlie dragged in a shaky breath. He eyed the harness, made of stout webbing and metal buckles. “It looked really fun until I started thinking about actually doing it.”
“Remember how you used to be scared to jump off the dock into Willow Lake? And then you did it and it was awesome.”
“Hel-lo. The landing was a lot different,” Charlie pointed out.
“You’re going to love it. Trust me on this.” Logan patted the top of Charlie’s helmet. “Look at all the safety features on this thing. The harness, the clips, the secondary ropes. There’s not one thing that can go wrong.”
“Yo, Charlie,” shouted a kid on the opposite platform. “Go for it!”
The encouragement came from André, Charlie’s best friend. The two had been inseparable all summer long, and if anyone could talk Charlie into something, it was André. He was one of the city kids in the program. He lived in a low-income project in the Bronx, and for André, it had been a summer of firsts—his first train trip, his first visit upstate to Ulster County, where Camp Kioga nestled on the north shore of Willow Lake. His first time to sleep in a cabin, see wildlife up close, swim and paddle in a pristine lake...and tell ghost stories around a campfire with his buddies. Logan liked the fact that at camp, all the kids were equal, no matter what their background.
“I kind of want to do it,” Charlie said.
“Up to you, buddy. You saw how it’s done. You just stand on the edge and take one step forward.”
Charlie fell silent. He stared at the waterfall cascading down the rocky gorge. The fine spray from the rushing cataract cooled the air.
“Hey, buddy,” Logan said, wondering about his son’s faraway expression. “What’s on your mind?”
“I miss Blake,” he said, his voice barely audible over the rush of the falls. “When I go back to Mom’s, Blake won’t be there anymore.”
