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Page 21
His foggy mind calculated what was happening, but he couldn't react, that is, until Shea stirred beside him. She rubbed her eyes sleepily. "Is everything alright?" she asked softly.
His drunken fog cleared in an instant. "What are you doing?" he demanded, shoving her arms off him as if she were diseased. "I thought I already ordered you out!"
She too was wide-awake now. "I'm helping you."
He jumped out of the bed, retying his sash across his chest. "By lying in bed with me?"
She sat slowly. "I missed you," she said, as if that explained everything.
He growled low in his throat. "Get out of here Shea, before I have the guards take you to the dungeon."
Her green eyes narrowed into a glare. "Do not try to lie to me and tell me you don't miss me also," she purred as she stood. Her hand slid over his chest. "We were good together once."
He pushed her hand away angrily. "You used me."
"I loved you."
He laughed bitterly. "You loved my title."
"I've changed," she said, stepping closer, her voice almost hypnotic as she stared into his eyes. "Give me another chance."
Qwinn blinked slowly as his mind quickly filled with fog once more. He felt his awareness dulling, his limbs going heavy. He also found himself leaning closer to her. "L…leave," he muttered.
She brushed a hand over his cheek, her eyes intently gazing into his again. "Not before I get a kiss," she whispered, standing on her toes and pressing her lips to his. She sighed and immediately wrapped all of her arms around him.
Qwinn's mind screamed at him to snap out of it and with much effort, he broke through the fog she had created. In the next instant, he sent Shea flying onto the bed. "Stay out of my head!" he snarled, physically shaking out the rest of the fog. She gasped in surprise as he growled angrily. "Get out! I will not ask again."
She stared at him like a hurt animal, then gathered her pride, lifted her chin and walked to the door. "Fine. But, she won't ever love you the way I can," she said before she shut the door behind her.
Qwinn walked quickly to the water basin in his room and splashed himself with cold water. It helped to wake him up slightly, but his head throbbed even worse than when he'd woken up. He was sure Shea's hypnosis had something to do with it.
He placed his hands on either side of his head and closed his eyes, concentrating. He tried to stop his head from throbbing. It lessened slightly. For some reason he never could fully heal his own headaches; he figured it was because healing took so much concentration.
Why was Shea being more persistent than usual? Was it because she knew the Solar Eclipse was soon? Even if there were no Eclipse or wedding, he would never be with her again. He'd learned his lesson the first time and now he mentally kicked himself for letting her kiss him. After all the centuries of living with Adalia, he'd learned to overpower persuasion powers. The wine made him groggy and slow, something he, as a King, should never risk.
He stared at his rippled reflection in the water basin and frowned. He was falling apart and he looked it. The wine still desperately grabbed for him and he longed to be swept away into its nothingness, but suddenly there was something he longed for more. Without wasting a moment to try to talk himself out of it, he let himself out of the room and made his way quietly through the halls. From the dim light coming through the windows, he could tell it must be about noon. Everyone was no doubt asleep. He paused at Alison's door for only a moment before opening it quietly.
She slept soundly, her red hair a cloud of fire around her. He eased himself down slowly, until he was seated on the bed beside her. His eyes consumed her features like a starving man, memorizing every line, every smooth plain, and every curve. It seemed as though Shea had awakened something in him but he wanted to share that something with Alison. Now, more than ever, their union made sense to him.
He carefully brushed a lock of her red hair from her face, his fingers memorizing the smooth creaminess of her cheek. She looked so peaceful and vulnerable, his to protect.
Guilt suddenly slammed him. What sort of protector allowed her to re-break her leg? What sort of fiancée kissed another woman? What sort of friend left another in pain? The guilt consumed him until it almost suffocated him. The wine weakened his defenses and everything seemed to attack him at once, the Torin attacking, his wedding, the council, Shea sneaking in and his discovery about Adalia with Vin. It was overwhelming.
For the first time since his mother died, he felt the overpowering urge to cry. It disgusted him. He would not be a weakling, yet at the same time, he knew he would feel better if he freed all the stress from his body.
Though he held back the tears, the emotional cloud surrounding him grew heavy on his shoulders. He sunk, pressing his face into the bed beside her arm. He felt lost; he was losing control over everything.
He felt himself sinking deeper and deeper into sorrow. Then suddenly he felt a hand rest against his shoulder. He stiffened for a moment then relaxed under Alison's touch. She didn't say anything, but her presence was very comforting. That was all it took to break through his quickly crumbling walls.
His tears broke through his last ounce of defense, wetting the blanket under his face. He felt his anger and frustrations melting away from him as if someone were washing dirt from his skin. Somewhere in his mind, he blamed the wine for making him act so ridiculously.
Alison slowly began to smooth her hand back and forth across his shoulders, still not making a sound. The next moment, Qwinn pushed himself up from the bed, turning away from her so she didn't see his tears. He felt like an idiot for coming here. She shouldn't see him like this.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. There were so many things he was sorry about; he wasn't sure which one he was bringing up at the moment. He didn't hear any movement behind him.
"I'm sorry too," she finally answered back. "I really do appreciate what you've done for me…it's just hard for me to be dependent on someone else, for a change…"
He shook his head, finally turning to her. "I've been selfish. I do not want you as a pet; I want you as my friend. I wasn't willing to share you with everyone else," he looked down in thought. "You are amazing to me. I've never met anyone like you. I don't want to…lose you."
Silence filled the chamber as they each soaked in what was said. Finally, Alison sucked in a breath, drawing Qwinn's attention. "I cannot promise you anything Qwinn. You shouldn't expect anything less from me, but if you will heal my leg… I will try," she swallowed hard, "to be a part of your people."
His dark eyes studied hers carefully; he knew she spoke the truth. It seemed that something in her had changed from wanting to flee at any chance, to wanting to stay. Her life on the surface was not an easy one, it was not doubt that her life in Vidar would be more pleasant; however, the acceptance of his people would be a challenge. The deal she was offering was the answer he was searching for.
"On a few conditions," he said.
He watched as hope lit her eyes, followed closely by caution. "Such as…?"
"I will heal your leg, but only enough that you can walk around. Not enough that you can run away."
Her chin lifted. "Is that all?"
"I will also post a guard outside your door to make sure you are safe."
HER EYES NARROWEED SUSPICIOUSLY, SHE knew the guard would be there to watch her, but the thought of having her leg healed was exactly what she wanted. She could deal with everything else when the time came. "Deal!" she said, sticking her hand out.
He stared at her hand in confusion then realized what she was getting at. Not knowing exactly how to shake her hand, he patted it and nodded. She tried to stifle a giggle. She couldn't help that their conversation had suddenly put her in a giddy mood. Without wasting another second, she pushed back the blanket, not even ashamed of showing her skin. She had wanted this for too long.
Qwinn hesitated for a moment and a quick stab of fear raced through her. Was he going to take back what he said? Then he rested his hands o
n her thigh. A hot blush crept into her cheeks. If her grandmother could see this, she would have a heart attack.
Qwinn closed his eyes, sucking in a deep breath. Alison bit her lip nervously, waiting for the magic to happen. Suddenly a soft blue glow began to light from his hands and onto her leg. The light grew more intense, covering her entire thigh. The next thing she knew, she could feel her bones shifting.
She cried out from the split second of intense pain as he moved the bones back into place, then the pain was gone. The swelling of her leg disappeared and for once, her leg felt whole.
She continued to stare in amazement until the blue glow faded and his eyes opened. "Are you alright?" he asked softly as he slid his hands over the soft skin where the break had been to see if he had missed anything.
Without answering him, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood. She was a little shaky and she could feel a dull ache in her leg, but she was standing! She took a few test steps and tottered slightly, but Qwinn grabbed her arm to steady her. "Easy."
Her heart was so light she could have hugged him, but she refrained. Instead she threw him a huge smile as she walked slowly back to the bed. She would probably still need a cane, but she could walk more than three steps; there was hardly any pain, her bone merely ached. She sat on the bed. "Thank you."
Qwinn stood before her. "Please forgive me for being so harsh with you earlier."
She nodded then her face became serious. "What were you crying about before, if you don't mind me asking?"
He frowned slightly. "I was…overwhelmed with life. I never cry," he added sternly.
Alison smiled comfortingly at him. She had seen how lost he'd looked as he pressed his face into the bed. On instinct, she had touched him and she felt him crumble beneath her; there was something about that moment that made him so real to her. She honestly had wanted to comfort him and no matter how much she denied it to herself, she cared about him. She cared about her captor.
Qwinn sat beside her, starring across the room in deep thought. There was a look in his eyes that could only be described as haunted. "She was trying to protect us," he said so quietly that she nearly missed it.
"Pardon?" she asked, her attention returning to him.
"My mother," Qwinn answered solemnly. "The humans were attacking my people…There was so much killing, but my father and his soldiers were convinced we would win," he combed his hand through his dreads as he frowned at the ground. "And for a brief moment, it seemed as if we were…" he trailed off.
Alison could tell the story pained him. She wondered what had brought it to his mind. She couldn't help but feel a little excited that he was finally talking about his mother. "Naliya told me a little about the war and the Prince."
Qwinn met her eyes, his own deep pools of pain. "They would not listen to my father. They would not even listen to a seer…"
"What happened to your mother?" she dared ask. She knew he very well could ignore her question as he did many times before, but this time was different, he would tell her.
He continued to stare her right in the eye. "When we began to gain land in pushing them out of the forests, the King sent assassins after the people closest to my father…us."
Alison's eyebrows rose. She was almost hypnotized by the story. The memory was so potent; she could almost feel Qwinn's fear.
"While my father fought, humans slipped into our house, slaughtering anyone who got in the way. Adalia and I were too young to fight and so were hidden in the closet. When the humans came to our room, my mother used what little powers she had to protect us," his voice grew thick with tears. "One of them drove a sword through her heart, as easy as if she were a sack of grain…they couldn't find me and my sister. We…saw the whole thing…"
Alison's heart broke as she watched a tear slide from Qwinn's eye.
"Vidarian soldiers were coming, so the humans fled. My powers were not developed enough to save her." His tears increased. "I should have practiced more…instead I wanted only to learn to fight…men were never healers." He closed his eyes finally in misery. "If I had practiced, I could have healed her."
Alison watched his shoulders slump in anguish. It flashed her back to when she lost her father. She could relate to his pain, though she hadn't watched her father die. Before she could stop herself, she slid to him, wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a comforting hug. "It wasn't your fault," she said soothingly.
To her surprise, he held her as if she were his lifeline. In her minds-eye, she could practically see the horrible event play out before her in that very room. No wonder the Vidarian's hated humans. No wonder Qwinn never wanted to speak of his mother; the horrible memory of her death must have replayed every time anyone mentioned her name.
"I lost my father when I was eight... He was all I had and the next thing I knew, he was gone," she said softly. "I didn't even get to say goodbye." She breathed deeply, feeling her own tears surface at the familiar pain. "I know how you feel, but… it helps me if I think of the wonderful things we did together, instead of his death."
Qwinn pulled away slightly, his arms still surrounding her. "I will never forgive what they did to her. She was innocent!"
Alison nodded. "I'm not saying you should forgive them…just… remember her. I'm sure she was an amazing woman. Honor her memory."
Qwinn studied her face thoughtfully. It was then she realized how close their faces were. A blush lit her cheeks as she lowered her eyes shyly. He gently brushed his knuckles across her cheeks before unwinding himself from her. "I apologize. You should not see me like this."
She shrugged, covering her shyness. "It is nice to see that you have normal emotions," she teased lightly.
He smiled sadly. "I should let you rest," he said as he stood.
"Qwinn," Alison stopped him. He turned toward her. "Perhaps you could tell me how wonderful your mother was sometime?"
After a silent moment, he nodded then left.
Alison stared at the ceiling, ever since he had woke her up, she wasn't able to fall back to sleep. Her mind was buzzing with thoughts and excitement at her newly healed leg. Shortly after he left, she heard voices from the hall. She assumed Qwinn had set the guards into place, as he said he would.
For some reason, she didn't mind. She had no urge to run away, this morning anyway. She found herself to be more curious than anything. Qwinn had showed her a new side of himself, one that intrigued her. Something in her told her that she would be able to help his tortured soul, even if only in a small way.
In the entirety of her life, she never felt needed by anyone as she did now. The feeling was heady. She could almost still feel his arms around her. Before this moment, she had never taken herself to be a romantic, but she wouldn't mind being held again. She tried to fight herself on this, but there was no denying that she was strongly drawn to Qwinn. So, for now, she would wait and see what unfurled.
QWINN WOKE IN A BETTER MOOD than he'd been in a long time. The fact that he could still smell Alison on his skin made his smile bloom. She had touched him on her own accord and didn't recoil in disgust. When she'd hugged him, he had calmed and for the first time since retelling that horrible night, he felt as if he could breathe. Her touch soothed more than she knew.
As he bathed and dressed, he noticed a slight bounce in his step. His world didn't seem so chaotic anymore now that everything was smoothed over with Alison. As he made his way to the council chamber, Adalia intercepted him. She looked fired up and ready to tear into him, most likely about the fact that he'd ordered her not to see Alison. When she registered his mood, she stopped. "What happened?" she asked in confusion.
Qwinn felt a smile tug at his lips. "What do you mean?"
She wasn't falling for his act of innocence, but she was still confused by his mood. "You seem…happy."
His smile grew. "Is that a crime, sister?"
"No…what about Alison?"
"Taken care of." He stepped around her.
She quickl
y followed. "What? Taken care of meaning we have talked it out or taken care of meaning I've killed her?"
He chuckled. The sound actually felt good. It had been so long since he was truly happy that this was all so new to him. "We've talked about it." He grabbed the handle to the chamber. "One more thing, I've healed her leg," he finished as he shut the door on her shocked face.
Today was a good day, he decided. He would not let anything ruin it.
After the meeting, he tried not to rush straight to Alison's room. He didn't want to seem too eager; however, he was lying to himself. He wanted to see her.
Outside her door, he heard laughter. He let himself in to find Adalia bracing Alison as she tried to move her hips in a circular fashion. As soon as the girls saw him, Alison blushed brightly and immediately stopped.
"What is going on here?" he asked.
"I figured that since you healed her, I should start teaching her how to dance."
His eyes widened in surprise. "Dance?"
Adalia smiled mischievously. "Yes. She wants to learn."
"It was just a little silliness really," Alison added awkwardly, grabbing her cane and bracing herself.
"Nonsense," Adalia said. She turned to Qwinn. "She has a lot of potential."
Alison blushed again as his eyes fell on her, studying her. He wasn't sure how he felt about her dancing. Shea was a dancer and their relationship ended badly…but Alison was not Shea.
Dancing was one of the most beautiful forms of expression there was. The Vidarian people adored it. Qwinn, however, saved his form and grace for the battlefield. Whenever there was a celebration, it wasn't uncommon to see almost every member of society joining in one traditional dance or another. The dancers at the tent chose entertainment as their means for a living, while others only danced when the occasion called for it, trying their hand at other jobs.
"Be careful," was all he said. If dancing made her happy, he wasn't going to take that away from her now that they were on good terms again.