Crown's Shield: The Aermian Feuds: Book Two
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She finally turned to him, glaring, and crossed her arms. “No,” she said, more loudly this time.
“Exactly. Stop treating me like I will stab you in the back every time you turn around. Since you came here, I have put your health and wellbeing above everyone else’s whereas you have lied repeatedly. Don’t punish me for crimes I did not commit.” Tehl lifted an arm toward Sam, Gav, Zachael, and Garreth. “And these men have protected you from more than you realize. I would appreciate it if you could keep your disdain for everything about your life to a minimum when in their company. They deserve more.”
She studied the group of men. “I understand. I will make an effort not to let my bitterness bite them.” She turned back to him, both brows lifted. “My health and wellbeing? If my wellbeing was really your priority you wouldn’t have dumped the entire stress of this wedding on my head.”
“It was my understanding that women loved that sort of thing.” Tehl winced as her scowl deepened. “I have since been informed that you, however, do not share that sentiment.”
“Of course not. I mean, would you find something like that enjoyable?”
“No, planning the one festival was more than enough for a lifetime.” His nose wrinkled in distaste. “It was a nightmare, and I hated every moment.”
“Precisely. At least we are in agreement on one thing.” Sage twisted her lips. “I will not do the tasks you discard because you can’t stand them. We have to do them together, share the burden.”
Tehl wanted nothing to do with the celebrations, but what she proposed made sense, it was only fair. Thus, much to his surprise, he reached out and, for the second time in two weeks, shook the hand of his betrothed. And when she didn’t jerk out of his grasp immediately, Tehl counted that as a small victory. “Agreed.”
She gave a brisk nod and strode away, returning to the four men still waiting for them. Tehl trailed behind, allowing her to speak with his brother before she strolled toward the palace. Tehl arrived at Zachael’s side, noting that all the men stared after his betrothed. Sam was obviously both intrigued and a bit lustful, Gavriel was undoubtedly concerned, and Zachael seemed to feel admiration. Tehl, too, watched her disappear and, for the first time, counted himself lucky. She drove him crazy but he could have done a lot worse.
“That one right there is a gem. She may be rough around the edges but she will surprise us all, mark my words,” Zachael commented.
“Sage is full of surprises,” Sam grouched.
Tehl smiled at his brother’s tone. Sam always hated mysteries he couldn’t solve and it was obvious that Sage was one of them. She didn’t quite fit into any category: rebel, nobility, common, or royal. Sage just was.
Chapter Eighteen
Sage
The following day passed in a flurry of fittings and last minute wedding preparations, such as wine tasting, not that Sage complained. The wine certainly helped when it came to practicing the wedding dance. Normally, she loved dancing but the shrew teaching was a real stickler when it came to form. When Sage finally spied her door late that evening, relief eased some of the tightness in her shoulders; her bed was close.
Sage pushed her door open and shut it, leaning her back against it, tipping her head up. Silence. Sage smiled as she was at last able to enjoy a moment of peace. No judging looks from her ladies in waiting, no instructor correcting her, no one demanding her attention. Just blessed silence. She dropped her head to admire the faint light filtering through the glass doors of her terrace. The sky was clear so the stars on display were breathtaking.
It was at that moment that a most unwelcome thought popped into her head: The next time she gazed at the stars she would be a married woman. She rubbed her arms as a chill ran up her spine at the thought. Her eyes darted to the cold hearth of the fireplace; sitting by the warmth of a fire would feel marvelous.
Sage bolted the door and wove around the furniture, avoiding the areas where darkness clung. She stooped in front of the fireplace and pulled pitched-soaked pine kindling from the basket. She was thankful one of the servants left the kindling, knowing she appreciated her privacy. She strategically placed the kindling in the cold hearth and struck her sulfur match. The spark caught the pine few after a few tries. Carefully she breathed on the precious flames, coaxing them to life. Soon, she had a roaring fire and it chased away the darkness, or most of it anyway. There was still a pool of darkness perched in her chair, which, up until now, she had studiously ignored.
Without turning around she addressed it, “I was wondering when you would show up. What do you want, Methi?”
A deep masculine laugh raised goosebumps on her arms. Sage scowled and rubbed at her arms, irritated that he’d been able to get a rise out of her before even saying a word.
“I was wondering if you had lost some of your edge when you didn’t seem to notice me.”
“Not at all,” she muttered, offended. “I deemed a fire more important than giving you the attention you’re seeking.” Sage pushed herself up and spun around to face Rafe who was sprawled comfortably in her chair like he owned the place. She’d known he would eventually seek her out, but she still didn’t feel ready for it. The lies he’d told her and the sting of his betrayal was not something she was yet able to let go of, nor her confusion over their last meeting. His hatefully spoken words still echoed in her mind, but now was not the time to dwell on those things. She pushed those thoughts aside and stood erect. Looking him in the eye, she said, “You have my attention. What do you want?”
He ran his eyes along her body, and though it was not overly sexual, she could still see heat in his gaze. “You look well.”
Sage snorted. She looked horrible. The lack of sleep combined with the exhausting schedule and the palace training had already etched black bags beneath her eyes. “Now, now. We both know you can lie better than that.”
His face pinched at her comment, but she wouldn’t take it back. These were consequences of his actions and losing her trust was one of them.
Rafe straightened and pushed himself from her chair, making her suddenly very aware of how far she was from the door. She felt a wave of sadness at the fact that she felt the need to be wary around him, but she also knew that, despite her having spent over a year in his company, he was very much a stranger to her.
“I wanted to offer my apologies.”
She blinked. That was unexpected.
Rafe inhaled deeply and released his breath through flared nostrils, his eyes solemn. “I was out of line and had no right to say those things to you. I am fully aware that you are not that type of woman. I was angry and upset, but that still doesn’t make it right.”
Sage nodded. She understood saying something you don’t mean in anger. “I understand. Our last conversation was difficult for both of us.” That was the truth. Sage understood his duty to protect his own kingdom, and therefor his identity, but it didn’t make his dishonesty any less hurtful. The fact was it had been his decisions that ultimately led to her torture, as well as being ousted from the rebellion and sold to the Crown. Sage might even have been able to work through these things and forgive him, except she had no idea if the man she thought she knew even existed. She had given everything to Rafe and his rebellion but gained nothing but pain and heartache. The entire situation had left a brand on her heart; she would not make that mistake again anytime soon.
“What are you thinking, little one? I can see the gears of your mind have been set in motion.”
Sage returned her focus to Rafe. “I’m wondering if I ever knew you, or if it was all a facade.” Her body tensed when he stepped toward her.
Rafe froze at her reaction. A frustrated breath huffed out of him before he began approaching her again, this time holding his hands out to his sides in supplication. “I’ve been myself with you from the beginning. I never changed who I was, and, although there were certain aspects of myself pertaining to my purpose and identity that I didn’t tell you, I was always real with you.”
Sa
ge stared at him, trying to decide if she believed him or not. She supposed it was true, that in all her time with him, their relationship and his treatment of her never changed, so either he was the best actor the kingdom had ever seen, or he was telling the truth. After a beat, she decided. “I believe you.”
His shoulders slumped, as if a great weight had finally been lifted off.
“You don’t know how glad I am to hear it, little one. I have agonized over this every moment these last weeks. It was all I could do not to come straight here and get you.” Rafe ran a hand through his silky hair and shot her a scowl. “Don’t think I didn’t know you ran straight here.”
Sage crossed her arms and glared right back. How dare he! “If I wasn’t worried for my safety and that of my family, I wouldn’t have had to leave early. I just couldn’t trust you not to try and spirit me away in the night. I had no choice, thanks to you.”
He gave her a rueful smile. “I’ll admit that was my plan that first night. Color me surprised when I didn’t find you on the Sirenidae.”
Sage smirked. “And how did Lilja react to that?”
He mirrored her smirk. “She never knew I came aboard.”
Her smile slipped. Lilja’s race had some unique qualities, one of which was the ability to hear things that most people couldn’t. There wasn’t any way he could have slipped aboard unknown without sprouting wings. Her eyes narrowed. “How?”
Rafe smirk grew wider. “You will never know.”
Did he do something to her? Sage’s brows knit. “You better have not touched them.”
Rafe’s smile disappeared altogether. “How could you ask such a thing?”
“I don’t know you.” Sage shrugged. “Just because I believe you didn’t lie about absolutely everything doesn’t mean I can trust you.” Pain flickered across his face, and she felt a twinge of guilt, but she immediately stamped it down. She wouldn’t allow him to make her feel bad for a situation that he himself had caused. “You didn’t answer my question.” Sage took a small step back, toward her bed.
“No, I did not hurt them.”
She relaxed slightly. Fatigue settled over her like a warm blanket. Sage snuck a glance at the pitch-black sky that seemed to swallow the light of the stars. It was very late. She should be in bed already.
The pop of the fire brought her attention back to her surprising guest and it occurred to her to wonder, Why was he still here? He had said his piece. Why hadn’t he taken his leave? She heaved out a weary sigh as she moved to pull back the covers of her bed. Propping a hip against the tall bed, she raised her eyebrows expectantly. “Is there something else you need?” She covered her yawn with her hand as best she could, then touched the soft coverlet. “Tomorrow is a big day for me. I need my rest.”
Rafe’s face darkened and his body tensed, putting her back on alert. She glanced at the bed, trying to gage how quickly she could get to the other side. She had a couple of blades on her, but her stash was at the other side of the room and she would need it if anything happened.
Rafe cocked his head and took a cautious step toward her. “I may have a solution to your problems.”
“Problems?” Sage repeated, confused.
“Your marriage to the prince. I’ve found a way out.”
Her eyes widened as wariness turned to a tremulous hope. What was he talking about? There was no way out, the rebellion had made sure of that, hadn’t they? “What are you talking about? Are you saying I need not marry tomorrow?” Even as she held her breath for his answer she viciously tried to stomp out that little seed of hope. There was no escape for her, and it would do no good to imagine otherwise.
“No, you will need to marry him.”
Sage glared at the rebellion leader. “Why would you get my hopes up?” she barked, her heart picking up speed. For a brief moment, she thought she might have a chance at freedom again. All the worse to realize it was not so.
“I meant what I said. You have to marry the crown prince but when we go to war, and we will, we can fake your death.”
Sage blinked, her hand clutching the blanket. Fake her death?
“Before you tell me I am addled, mull it over.” Rafe stared at floor and began pacing. “You’re known as the rebel’s blade and now also as the warrior princess to the court. When Scythia attacks you won’t be waiting here, you will be among those fighting. War is chaos. We can make it seem like you fell in battle, which will be glorious and honorable and you would be free of the prince without giving the rebellion cause for retaliation.” Rafe paused his pacing to look at her. “You can have the life you always wanted. You can be free of this marble prison.”
Her mind scrambled to keep up with the things he was suggesting. War. Chaos. Escape. Freedom. Living her life as she sought, not as someone bid her. But what of her family? “It sounds like you have put a great deal of thought into this, but what of my family? Where would we live? My face will be recognizable.”
“You and your family will come home with me, to Methi.”
Her jaw slackened. Methi. He wanted to take her to Methi. “As what?” she choked out.
Rafe looked at her with confusion. “What do you mean?”
If her life experience thus far had shown her one thing it was this: everyone wanted something. “What do you expect of me if I accept your help in escaping my nightmare?”
“Nothing,” he drawled softly. “I will take care of you like you are my own.”
“As your sister? Or like a daughter?” Sage pushed, knowing that was not what he had in mind.
“As my mate.”
Mate. There was that odd word for a wife again. Sage shook her head. She would not jump from one man to another. “Would you make me a harlot?”
He looked at her, aghast. “I would never dishonor you that way. We would have a ceremony that combined both our traditions.”
“That is not what I meant.” She made sure to look him in the eye as she spoke her next words. “Even if I agreed to what you are asking I could never be with you.”
The predatory glint in his eyes had her feet moving before she’d consciously decided to do so. The next thing she knew was that she was on the opposite side of the bed with both blades in hand.
Rafe glided to the opposite side and placed his hands on the mattress, leaning forward, his temper only just reined in. “Why,” he bit out, “do you keep scorning me? I have offered you exactly what you want. There is no one but yourself keeping you from the life you want.” His back heaved as he sucked in a breath before pinning her to the spot with his amber eyes. “I want you above all others.”
The sincerity of his words reverberated in her mind and pierced her heart. She looked at him, a sadness shadowing her face. “I could not marry you even if I wanted to, Rafe. Even if we faked my death I would still be married to the crown prince.”
“Annulment.”
“And if the war doesn’t come for years?”
Rafe ran his fingers around one of the post of her bed, then followed her, almost like he was hunting.
“Time doesn’t matter. As long as you remain untouched you can go free.” He paused, his smile gentle. “You can be free with me.”
Her heart squeezed with his words. Everything in her life was out of her control. If she said yes, she would not only be choosing her own path, but that of her family as well. She couldn’t leave them, but would they go with her? Would they even want to? Sage wanted to be reckless, throwing caution to the wind just to get out the depressing life she felt was ahead of her, but her head knew better than her heart. Rafe was, in a lot of ways, still very much a stranger, and he had hurt her even more than the Crown at this point in time.
Overcome with exhaustion, she lifted her fists and rubbed at her eyes, being careful not to gouge herself with her daggers. A whisper of sound reached her ears just as big hands wrapped around her wrists. Sage gasped, and his earthy scent filling her lungs.
“This is not a decision to be made lightly little one.” He tugge
d on her hands. “I will wait for your decision.”
Sage pulled her hands from his grip and stepped away. She needed to be alone. Everything he was saying and doing was just too much for her to handle, especially tonight. She sheathed her daggers, unlocked the door, and opened it, peering into the hallway outside. Two Elite had posted themselves there. Sage grimaced and briskly nodded at them before stepping into the hallway. Rafe wouldn’t go unseen so his presence would no doubt get back to Tehl. Sage levelly met his gaze and gestured down the hall. “Please leave.”
His lips thinned and the corners of his eyes pinched, but that was the only indication that he was less than happy with her dismissal. He stalked through the doorway, ignoring the looks of interest and suspicion the Elite were throwing his way. He didn’t stop until he was toe to toe with Sage. He cupped her chin and lifted her face, staring into her eyes. “Hold your head high tomorrow, little one. Through your strength, bravery, and honor you have become the savior of kingdoms. People will not understand your sacrifice. Royalty doesn’t come from just your bloodline but from your character. You are just as much royalty as the crown prince.”
Sage swallowed thickly, tears pricking her eyes, touched by his sudden sincerity. “Thank you,” she whispered.
His eyes dipped and Sage turned her face just in time, his lips brushing the corner of her mouth in a kiss. He lingered there.
“What is family for, little one?” He breathed against her skin before pulling back and caressing her jaw. “Until tomorrow.”
Sage watched him stride away, disappearing into the shadows of the castle. His black cloak seemed to soak up light. A throat cleared, catching her attention. Sage turned to the Elite guards who wore disapproving looks on their faces. She ignored their looks and stared down the hall. She trained with them, but it didn’t mean she owed them any explanation.
A flutter of color flickered down the hall. A familiar head of hair whipped back, disappearing around the corner. Caeja, Jaren’s daughter, the harpy mooing over the crown prince. Sage shook her head before trudging back into her room. She closed her door and leaned back against it. It amused her that the vicious noblewoman was spying on her, but it also created a problem.