Blue

by H. J. Bellus

  “Mom said it’s bedtime. Will you tuck me in, Tuck?” Ruger giggles after he asks the silly question.

  “Sure, buddy.”

  We all follow the little guy into the house and see the married couple studying us with worried eyes.

  “I’ll meet you in bed,” I whisper to Tuck.

  “Blue, you need your pills.” Joe jumps up from the couch.

  “Not tonight.”

  I don’t give her the chance to push them down my throat. I need to be wide awake for what’s about to go down between Tuck and me, because I have every intention of pushing him to his limits, and if he pulls back even the least bit, I’ll just accept my fate of living with a cursed, broken heart.

  “Goodnight.” I don’t make eye contact before I head down the hall and enter Tuck’s room. I want to cry. No, I take that back, I want to collapse into the fetal position and sob for his pain. I keep it all inside because I sure as hell don’t want to scare him off now, or ever again. All elements of emotions for the man who has been burned must vanish, and I can only look into those eyes of his.

  The door creaks open and I turn to see Tuck standing there frozen with no dark or pissed look on his face. He’s devoid of all emotion. It takes only three long strides across the room to shut the door behind him, and then I take his hand and guide him to the bed like he did to me at his house. When the back of his legs hit the bed, I stop him and go for the damn beanie on his head and toss it to the side.

  I have every intention of stripping this man to his core and proving to him that I’m not running. My fingers nab the hem of his t-shirt and begin tugging it up and over his head, and then I push down his gym pants. I don’t let my gaze linger too long on his scarred body because I can’t help but feel for him.

  Taking two steps back, I look up and down Tuck clothed only in his boxers. If I thought the scars would shatter me and make me melt for the man, then the pained look on his face just broke me. I strip before him, exposing every single part of me to him in the light of the room and then close the distance between us.

  The moment my skin hits his bare chest I know beyond a shadow of a doubt the curse is real with all the zinging tension bouncing between us. I spiral out of control with love and need, finally feeling Tuck on me. I place my palms on the most damaged part of his chest and look straight into his eyes.

  “I love you, Tuck. You saved me, now let me save you.”

  I feel the strongest man I’ve ever met tremble under my touch. He holds college records and takes on the best defenses in the nation, but with my touch he collapses back on the bed, and I have no intention of stopping. I’ll push him to his limits just to make him feel me.

  “Blue.” Tuck relaxes further back on the bed with his forearms covering his eyes. “I’ve never—”

  I plant my palms on either side of his head and crawl up on him, covering him once again, and there’s something about our skin contact that’s oddly addicting.

  “You’ve never what, Tuck?” I ask, placing a light kiss on his lips. “You’ve never driven a woman wild with just a look or pleasured her until she fell apart?”

  “No, Blue.” Tension and a hint of anger fills his voice, but I continue to push.

  “If you love me, you’ll open your eyes and watch me love every single part of your gorgeous body, Tuck.”

  Seconds pass, then moments pass, and what feels like an eternity passes, but I don’t give in or remove my palms from his chest. Feeling the burn marks underneath them pushes me harder to make the man open his eyes. My fingertips dig into his flesh, and I see his dark gaze and those eyes that have haunted my dreams.

  “Watch me, Tuck, watch me make love to you.”

  My lips touch down on his chest, and it’s as if he were stung by a wasp with the sharp intake of breath he inhales. My tongue runs down the rippled and scarred flesh all the way to his belly button. He’s hidden all of this from everyone. As my tongue continues to trail over his hard ridges of muscle, he squirms under my touch.

  “Eyes open, Tuck.”

  His abs relax a bit while I continue to swirl my tongue around his muscles and run my hands up to his shoulders. He grabs onto the back of my hands, clutching them with desperation. I’m pulled up to face level with him by his powerful force. Eye to eye, I wait for him to tell me to leave. It’s clear there’s something messing with him.

  “Blue.”

  “Tuck.”

  “I’ve never done this, and you are scaring me. I need a moment.”

  “So, you’re saying we can’t do this?” My body goes into safety mode and I pull away from him. Before I’m able to get away from him, he flips me over on my back and glares down at me with his stormiest eyes yet.

  “If you’d listen to me, I was going to tell you that I’ve never had sex, or even let anyone besides Joe, Ruger, and Austin see the real me. Joe came home and fucking saved me and nursed me back to health while continuing to go to the community college to finish her degree.” Tuck rests his elbows on the sides of my head, and I turn my head and place a light kiss on a part of his marred skin. “I’ve never even been into a girl until you, Blue, and I fought to keep you away.”

  My hands run up and down Tuck’s back, caressing and memorizing each contour of his burns. My fingertips gently pay careful attention to them while falling even fucking harder for the man. I’m thirsty to taste each of his wounds, helping him heal one at a time.

  “But I want you, Tuck. Does it look like I care?” My hands work harder to portray even more conviction.

  “You should.” His eyes squeeze shut. “You’re fucking gorgeous. Flawless, Blue, and I’m a monster of evil emotions and tainted skin.”

  “No one is perfect.” I reach up and place a light kiss on his lips. “Be my scars and flaws, Tuck, be mine.”

  Something unleashes inside of Tuck as he forces himself into me without any warning, and I scream.

  “Shhh…you want me, so here it is.”

  I know we are being loud in the small house and shouldn’t be, but neither of us can control our yelps and growls of pleasure. His skin rubs up and down mine as he works himself in and out of me. I hike my heels up and over his lower back, allowing him to drive harder and deeper. Tuck handles me like a ragdoll as he rolls me over to my belly and enters me again.

  His palm covers the back of my head as he presses my face harder down into his mattress. He’s being aggressive and controlling, but the only important part is…he’s letting me feel and see him for the first time. The pain from my side nearly threatens to knock my ass out, but the overwhelming pleasure keeps me from surrendering to it. Tuck slides his hand down to the nape of my neck, squeezing it even harder, and I spiral out of control. Ripping my head away, I bury my face and let the pillows drown out my screams.

  Tuck doesn’t stop as he continues to relentlessly drive in and out of me, and I feel that pleasure begin to build and bury my face again to muffle the sounds. The lack of oxygen threatens to knock me out, but when I feel him grow harder inside me, I explode and feel the earth move then scream out in pleasure. Let everything out that’s been building for months.

  Tuck’s quick to cover my mouth with his hand as he finishes up with his own release. His warmth spreads inside of me with each thrust of his hips, and it’s something I’ve never felt before. He rolls over, taking me with him, my naked back pressed against his sweaty chest. I run my hands up and down his sides, following the scar on his side all the way down his hip as far as I can reach. It doesn’t take long before he’s tensed up again with my touch.

  “Tuck.”

  I only get a light growl from him.

  “Was that the first time, like, ever?”

  “Yeah.” His hands cover the backs of mine, stopping them from running up and down his skin.

  “You did good.” I’m thankful he can’t see the stupid smile on my face right now.

  “I don’t like your skin on mine.”

  I try to roll off of him to look at his face.
r />   “No, Blue. I don’t want to look at you.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “You have to have some patience here, Blue. You’re flawless, laying on my burns and touching me, and I don’t know how to react.”

  “Do you like it?” I ask, clenching my eyes shut.

  “I more than like it, and that fucking scares me, but it also makes my skin crawl with the thought of you seeing me.”

  Sitting straight up, I go for the lights and turn them off. Then I make my way straight back to Tuck. Starting at mid-calf where his burns begin, I caress every part of them and then trail kisses along them. Slowly I work my way up his thighs and then glide my tongue across his delicious hips, stopping to appreciate his v-muscle.

  “Blue.”

  His heart is thundering in his chest, and I know his anxiety has to be sky high.

  “Tuck, I’m not looking at you. I’m just trying to love you.” I push up into a sitting position and straddle him. “Are you going to let me do that?”

  “Fuck, I hate this,” he growls and slams his fists into the mattress.

  “Hate what?” I push him harder.

  “That I’m this and you’re that.” I feel his hands wave around in the air, but don’t see them.

  “I don’t see your scars, Tuck.” I trail my finger down his chest, letting it bump and glide over him. “I see the man I want so bad. I see the man who has dark eyes and the most gorgeous face I’ve ever seen. I see you.”

  My need for him to give in or break grows stronger as I bend down and gently place kisses all over his chest and then trail slowly up his neck. From burnt skin to perfect skin, my tongue licks across him, and I moan in pleasure, soaking up everything Tuck. I just have no idea how to show this man I want all of him.

  My lips rest on his as I mumble into them. “It’s your choice, Tuck. I’m begging to be with you, and if you can’t believe that, then we need to stop this now.”

  “I want you and love you, but, Blue, you’re going to have to be patient with me.”

  His lips attack mine without warning as he kisses the ever loving shit out of me. Tuck’s words are not convincing at all, but the passion he pours into kissing me is my guarantee he’s in this to try. I kiss him back, and it shocks him to life, and his hands begin exploring my body. His hands grip my ass, squeezing to a near point of pain, and making me yelp in his mouth.

  He pulls back with a devilish grin on his face. “I think you’ve created a monster in this beast. I’m never going to get enough of you, Blue.”

  Something very large and extremely hard pokes between us, and I squirm against it.

  “My turn, Tuck.”

  My hips easily find him, and he has me so ready I slip down on him with ease. I splay my palms out over his chest and push myself up into a sitting position and begin to rock back and forth. My fingers dig into his skin as my pleasure builds. The electrifying sensation feels so amazing I try to slow it down to feel all of it before I burst, but I don’t have the chance before Tucks grips my hips and forces me. He controls the speed with his deathly grip pounding me up and down on him.

  He growls, and then I feel him harden and it’s all over for me as I tumble into ecstasy with him and go limp on his chest. He tenses right back up after his sensations wear off, but I refuse to move.

  “This is the most comfortable I’ve been in a long time, Tuck.”

  He brushes my hair from my face while his other hand rubs up and down my back. He never quits playing with my hair, which eventually lulls me to sleep.

  Chapter 23

  I feel his hand on my shoulder again and turn, expecting to see Tuck, but it’s not him. All the feelings flood back, and I scramble to safety, but am being held down by a stronger power. Panic sets in and I fight harder and try to scream, but my voice is stuck in my throat.

  “Blue.”

  My shoulders begin to shake, then I hear my name being called again.

  “I have you. It was a dream.”

  I pull my face from Tuck’s chest and look into his eyes and immediately relax into him.

  “Oh fuck,” I gasp.

  “It’s okay, baby.”

  His hands are on me again, rubbing everywhere.

  “I need a drink.”

  “Okay, let me get up.”

  He tries to gently set me on the bed next to him, but I yelp and he freezes.

  “Let me, Tuck.”

  “Fuck, are you in that much pain? We shouldn’t have.”

  I grip his face with both hands and force him to look up at me. I can barely make out his features in the dimly lit room. I kiss him softly.

  “We should do that every night of our life. Just give me a sec. I’m a little stiff.”

  I wince as I roll off him and realize it probably wasn’t the smartest idea to sleep on the brick wall known as Tuck in my condition.

  “Where are you going?” I ask as he gets up from the bed and throws on his boxers.

  “To start a bath.”

  “You’ll wake the whole house. No.”

  “Fine.” He grabs the doorknob. “I’ll get the hot tub ready and find your pills.”

  Somehow I have to fight through my pain and sore muscles, because there’s no way I’ll let him know how badly I’m hurting. I wouldn’t change last night for anything. I brush my feet on the dark hardwood floor, remembering everything that went down, and pray that Tuck won’t scare. He’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, been with, and touched. I just have to make him feel the way I see him.

  Creaks and squeaks from the hall fill the silent room and I know he’s on his way back in. I do my best to stand and move around the room, slowly gaining my bearings. One of Tuck’s large shirts lays on the ground, and I snag it and pull it over my head.

  “Ready?” He pops his head back in the door, and I see he’s fully clothed.

  Walking over to him, I tug his shirt off. “Am now.”

  He growls, but doesn’t take too long to protest as I hug him from the back and begin walking with him, trying not to clip his heels.

  “I didn’t know your sister had a hot tub,” I whisper.

  “It’s back in the corner. She’s paranoid about one of the kids getting in it. It’s just a small one.”

  “Nice.” I kiss his back as I follow him through the kitchen. I relax even more into him as he doesn’t growl or tense up this time.

  “They call it their personal soak and poke.”

  “Ewww.” I slap his shoulder. “Tuck, that’s gross.”

  “Don’t worry, I’m sure Joe has it well cleaned with chemicals, but I’m pretty sure they made a baby or two in it.”

  “Stop.” I pull back to walk down the stairs.

  His laughter soothes my heart, and I know in this moment that is a sound I want to hear the rest of my life. Before I know what’s going on, he sweeps me off my feet and wraps me in his arms.

  “Jones broke the line, he’s at the thirty, now the twenty, and he jumps over a defender.” He calls the plays out as he jogs to the hot tub, carrying me. “One defender left. Can Jones go all the way?”

  He drags his voice out just like a commentator would, and I laugh the whole way. The damn laughter causes my side to hurt worse than his jogging and juke moves.

  “Touchdown,” he roars as he places my bottom on the edge of the hot tub.

  I wrap my legs around his torso and tug him closer into me.

  “I think we’ve both scored. You do know I’m your biggest fan, right, Tuck Jones?”

  “I’m starting to realize it.”

  He pulls my shirt off, and I sit bare before him in the moonlight. I use my toes to dig into the waistline of his gym shorts and inch them down.

  “God, you have a huge ass, Tuck.” My toes struggle to get his shorts over his big ol’ booty.

  “I work out.” A sly smile dances on his face, and I lean forward and kiss it.

  When he’s completely stripped, I pull him in as close as possible and wrap my arms under his, cup
ping the back of his shoulders.

  “This is us, Tuck. Nothing between us ever again.”

  “This is us,” he repeats as he bends over and kisses me lightly on the lips. “You’re nipping out.”

  We both enter a fit of laughter as the night chills my body and goose bumps attack my skin.

  “It’s cold.” I turn in his grip and swing my legs over into the hot water. It’s a welcoming feeling compared to the cool air. Slowly, I sink lower into the hot tub. Tuck was correct about it being a small one; it’s probably a three person hot tub at best. And I try my best to avoid all thoughts of Joe and Austin baby-making in here.

  “Here.” Tuck’s outstretched hand holds all my pills. “Take them, and no arguing.”

  “But…”

  “No damn buts. I can see the pain all over your face.”

  I know it’s a losing battle and the last thing I want to do is fight with this stubborn ass.

  “Fine.” I snag the bottle of water from his hands and down the pills. “But get your ass in here so we can have some fun before the meds knock me out.”

  He sets the bottle on the ledge. “I never said I gave you the strong painkiller.”

  He winks at me and then hops in, not caring that he sent gallons of water splashing over the edge. I crawl into his lap and straddle him, facing him, and it’s like an automatic trigger neither of us can control. His lips meet mine hard and fast, not hesitating as I run my hands all over his back and shoulders, gripping down tightly into his flesh when he bites my lower lip. My hips begin to grind into him and find him hard and ready.

  “Again?” I pull back with a questioning look.

  “I told you that you’ve released something vicious inside of me.”

  “By all means, I’m not complaining, lover boy.”

  It only takes one swift movement of my hips and I slowly sink down on him. Just like everything Tuck, he’s hard and huge down in the boy department. It takes several moments for my body to adjust to him, and I relish every single second of it. He lays his head back on the ledge, then puts his hands on my hips, guiding me up and down.

  We start out slow, but within moments we’re rocking against each other at a rapid pace.