Cupid's Holiday Trilogy

by Geeta Kakade

  Toby said he would be in the greenhouse.

  It was a quiet crowd that dispersed.

  Jacob came into the family room an hour later to see Laurel sitting on the couch her knees drawn up to her chest her arms wrapped around them. Coco and Cody were by the couch as if they sensed her mood of despair.

  She was staring ahead of her as if she could see something that frightened her.

  “What is it?”

  He was down on his haunches beside her and she looked at him.

  “N.n..nothing.”

  He got to his feet and sat down beside her putting both arms around her.

  “Is this about last night?”

  She shook her head against his chest and he felt his heart spasm with love for her. “It’s something that happened just now when I was in the kitchen with the others. I remembered seeing a woman I know but I can’t remember her name.”

  “Tell me about last night first.”

  The thought of her warm body curled around his back was driving him crazy but Jacob knew he couldn’t break his promise to the General. Ama had always said a man kept his word; boys broke the promises they made.

  Laurel was silent for so long he thought she wasn’t going to say a word.

  “Laurel, please?”

  Drawing a long breath she let it out. “I dreamed Sylvie was in trouble and I wanted to help her but I couldn’t. I was in a cage of some sort and couldn’t get out.”

  She decided to leave the bit about the monster out. She didn’t want Jacob to think she was a basket case.

  “That’s the second time Sylvie’s triggered a memory for you.” Jacob was quiet for a while. Her line of thinking was the same; the other woman had been asking for help too.

  “What happened this morning?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. We were telling Moira about the plan for her business. Not only did she like the idea she started crying.” Laurel took a big breath. “I had a flashback. I remember someone else crying. She was in uniform and said, “He won’t let me alone no matter what I say.’ I don’t know why…” Laurel’s voice trailed off.

  “Anything else?” He made his tone as normal as possible. This was a big breakthrough. It was also the first time she had recalled a person who could be related to the incident.

  “I just remembered feeling helpless but furious.”

  The cage signified that helplessness.

  “That’s good. You’re beginning to remember things.”

  After a few minutes he said, “Let’s go out for a while. Any idea where you want to go?”

  “Can we go back to the Reservation?”

  There was an urgency about her request but Jacob ignored it. He wanted her mind to have a chance to calm down first before it was exposed to the same triggers that brought on her nightmares.. “I talked to Ama and she’s better. I don’t want to go there today but in a day or two we’ll both go.”

  There was a final note in his voice that Laurel hadn’t heard before and she decided to keep quiet.

  He stood up and pulled her to her feet. “We have to get going. I have an idea…”

  “What?”

  “You’ll see.” He said. “We won’t be back till late so I’ll just leave a note on the refrigerator in the kitchen and be right back.”

  There was no one there and he came back to see Laurel standing near the car watching the dogs as one brought his ball to her and the other her toy.

  They were on the highway and he was heading for South Lake Tahoe when he said, “ We’re going to Harrah’s for the rest of the day.”

  “The casino?”

  “Yes. If you get tired of trying the different machines and tables I’ll get a room so you can rest. I just made reservations on my phone for a show tonight I think you’ll enjoy. I texted Holt to meet us there with Moira as I have four tickets. Christy and Bridget are going to supervise Frank’s homework.”

  Laurel relaxed. If this outing was to help Holt she was all for it. Things had cooled off considerably between him and Moira since the Beetle had broken down.

  Laurel looked at Jacob. There was more on his mind than matchmaking. She knew he was going all out to create a diversion for her and she appreciated it. Glad she had a nice scarf in her bag she pulled it out and knotted it around the neck of her chocolate brown shirt.

  Harrah’s was impressive with its gilt décor and Mardi Gras theme. Jacob cashed twenty dollars as she said she was going to play the nickel slots and changed another twenty for himself. They walked around first, watched a free show and then tried their luck at the slots and the different tables. Laurel finally won twenty dollars at Blackjack and decided to quit while she was ahead. At four Moira and Holt joined them for the buffet at the amazing Forest Buffet and by seven thirty they were in their seats in the South Shore Room for an unforgettable performance by the gospel group, Blind Boys of Alabama.

  Laurel was amazed by the music and so impressed by the singers she couldn’t stop clapping.

  “How on earth did you get us these tickets so quickly?” she asked Jacob.

  “There are a few seats reserved for service personnel and Mark knows someone here who gets their tickets for them. Bridget and Christy love this group and he mentioned you and Moira might too.”

  Mark had mentioned the shows in the casinos made a change from their routine and Jacob had been glad of the diversion the show provided today. Laurel needed this reprieve.

  “They’re amazing. Thanks for thinking of it.”

  After the show they went to the Vex Nightclub and watched the aerial performers and some professional dancers in between dancing themselves. The music had everyone on the dance floor and Laurel mentioned to Jacob that Moira looked flushed and happy.

  “Holt’s been bitten by the love bug,” said Jacob with a smile. “All he can talk of is Moira.”

  Laurel wondered what it would feel like to have someone madly in love with you. The more she thought about Walt the more she realized they couldn’t have been in love if he had filed for divorce so quickly after they were married. They must have been in lust. Carol had said Laurel had told her the fights had started right after they were married, as Walt had done a complete about face the minute they were married. He wanted Laurel to quit her military career and be a stay at home wife. Carol had also said Laurel’s last e-mail before Walt had died had stated when she’d refused his ultimatum, he had decided the marriage was over and was filing for divorce.

  Jacob felt bad about the sadness in Laurel’s eyes as she looked at Moira and Holt. He would give anything to hold her close and tell her how he felt about her; convince her happiness was within her reach.

  He wanted her with or without her memory; for better or for worse.

  Better than anyone else he knew adding anything to her already full plate would not help her now.

  The number changed to a fast lively beat and he held a hand out to her.

  Laurel realized she loved dancing as Jacob guided her through some intricate steps and she could follow his lead with very little effort. It made her happy that they both had something in common other than her problems.

  When they finally left Harrah’s it was midnight. Conscious of his gaze on her as they went into the apartment she looked at him, “Thank you Jacob.”

  During a slow number, she had danced really close to him surprised at first by his stiffness but he relaxed soon enough. Laurel hoped her message was getting across. She wanted to take a giant step forward in her relationship with Jacob.

  If actions really spoke louder than words, he would get her message.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Ma didn’t know when she had enjoyed a concert so much and to see Jacob and Laurel dance had been a sight for sore eyes. Moira and Holt hadn’t done so badly either. Holt didn’t know it yet but Moira had signed up for dance lessons in the early afternoons. Bridget had told her she needed company in her once a week class and Moira had given in.

  Agnes knew the next few days were going to
be hard on Laurel but she also knew love became stronger when it was tested and it was very important for Laurel to be very sure about her love for Jacob before she regained her memory. It would tip the balance later.

  She was really pleased with the way Jacob had fallen in love with Laurel. If Laurel had been one of those weak women, sighing and crying he would have simply treated her as a patient but Laurel’s strength of mind and her courage had impressed him and awoken his interest in her as a person.

  Maybe if there was a permanent position as Director of Romance, Agnes would apply for it after this assignment.

  Stephen flitted back and forth by the lakeshore. Brian had taken the final step to reach his daughter and Stephen hoped Bridget’s response would be the right one. Brian seemed to be blaming himself more with each passing day. Alex and Emma were worried about him. Brian’s future happiness lay in Bridget’s hands and Stephen had sent telepathic thoughts to Lucy telling her he was deeply sorry for all that he had said and done when his son had fallen in love with her and asking for her forgiveness.

  He needed her help now if he wasn’t to lose his son for the second time in his life.

  The next day Bridget found them in the attic as Laurel and Christy were finalizing the latter’s choice for pictures for the calendar. “I came by to say I’m going to town to drop off the jars at Cora’s with Moira, and would anyone like a ride?”

  “Would you mind taking me?” asked Laurel. “Jacob’s working and there’s something I want to do on my own.”

  Bridget hesitated and then said, “Sure.”

  “I’ll see you both later,” Christy looked at the small clock on the wall. “I have an online quilting class in a few minutes.”

  “I need a recipe from Mrs. Kemp,” Bridget told Laurel. “The parts of my meatloaf that weren’t scorched yesterday tasted awful so I must have left something out. I’ll be in the kitchen when you’re ready to leave. Moira and Toby are loading the car.”

  Ten minutes later they were on their way. Bridget dropped Laurel off on Main Street and told her she’d pick her up by Cora’s in an hour. Her eyes had questions in them that she was too polite to ask but Laurel didn’t want to provide any answers just then.

  Laurel walked quickly to the Professional Building and into the doctor’s office. She’d called this morning after Christy and Bridget had both gone into the house and Alice the nurse told her Dr. Ali’s sister Dr. Tasmin could fit her in. She’d intended to call a cab for the appointment but accepting Bridget’s offer was easier. Laurel had wanted to talk with a gynecologist about her missed period just to reassure herself.

  When she got back to Bridget’s car she looked tense.

  “Did you get what you wanted?” asked Bridget quickly noticing the absence of any bags and the blank expression on Laurel’s face.

  “Yes.”

  Laurel didn’t say a word on the way back and Bridget started to worry as she and Moira chatted about Cora’s shop. When the car pulled up on the drive Laurel slipped out with a brief thanks. Bridget reached for her cell phone. She had to text Jacob to let him know something was up with Laurel.

  Jacob’s phone was being charged and he didn’t check his messages. He walked into the bedroom half an hour later taken aback to see Laurel lying on her side curled up. He went around the bed to see if she was asleep. Her eyes were wide open and she was staring at the wall on the far side of the room.

  “Laurel! What’s wrong?” he asked.

  She sat up and looked at him and he could see she’d been crying. “Why didn’t you tell me about my baby, Jacob?”

  “What baby?” It was as if a giant fir had landed on his head.

  “The one Dr. Tasmin says I miscarried.”

  He put a hand out to her but she scooted back on the bed, away from him.

  “I don’t know about any baby,” he said.

  She stared at him, searching his face.

  “I don’t know about any baby Laurel.” He repeated as he lifted both hands and placed it on her shoulders.

  She pushed his hands off her shoulders. “I want to know the truth Jacob. I am sick of lies and of feeling like this and not knowing what kind of life I’ve led. I’m sick of it.”

  “I know.”

  “How could you know? You’re fine and at the end of the day you don’t find yourself up against a wall you can’t scale.”

  “I’m sorry Laurel.”

  She started sobbing and he sat down on the bed and gathered her to him.

  “I know how hard it is,” he said holding her head to his chest. “I would do anything to see you well again. I swear to you I don’t know anything about a baby.”

  He pressed his lips against her hair and rocked her and gradually she calmed down. When she lifted her face to his, he bent his head and took her lips in a long kiss. It was the only way he knew how to console her.

  After she washed up he took her on a long drive, neither of them saying much.

  Laurel looked out of her window at the beautiful fall color blankly. Her heart was so dark and she was so afraid. It felt nature was impervious to her feelings, flaunting beauty that hurt her. She wanted grey skies and a fog she could hide in today.

  She must be worse than she thought not to remember her baby. What kind of woman forgot something like that? Did Aunt Grace and uncle Paul know about it? Had they decided not to tell her for ‘her own good’, as they put it? She hated those words.

  Jacob could only guess at the torment she was going through. He had never expected her to go off to the doctor on her own or guessed what the outcome would be. Why hadn’t the General mentioned the baby to him? She hadn’t been checked by the OB/GYN at Bethesda because there had been no need to repeat the exams she’d had at LRMC. Everyone had focused on the neurological and psychiatric aspects of her case and nothing else.

  They stopped on the way back for a soup and sandwich dinner. She couldn’t remember eating. When they got back it was nine o’clock. Laurel took a long bath and her medicine and got into bed quietly.

  It was the first time Jacob had seen her so beaten. He lay on his bed and waited for her to fall asleep before he went into the garage, glad to see no one else was there. He called the General and the phone was answered right away.

  “Jacob! How are you and Laurel doing?”

  He wasn’t in the mood for polite exchanges. Not with the General. Not with the President of the country for that matter.

  “Why didn’t you tell me Laurel had miscarried?”

  “What the…? Miscarried? I didn’t know about any miscarriage.”

  “But she’s been married before?

  “Yes,” said the General. “Right after combat training but he died six months later. She never talked about it and I didn’t think it was worth mentioning. It’s in her file. How did you find out about the baby? She never told me or her aunt about it! Grace would have said something to me if she knew. We talked every week whenever Laurel deployed.”

  “She went to a local gynecologist today on her own and the doctor mentioned it to her.”

  “Holy Mackerel! What did you say to her?”

  “I couldn’t say anything.” He was aware the frustration he felt showed in his voice but he couldn’t help it. Today was the first day he hadn’t been able to help Laurel.

  “I’ll get on it and e-mail you about it as soon as I find out something. Sorry about all of this.”

  “Goodnight sir.” Jacob hung up.

  The next morning he asked Christy if he could borrow the boat for the day. From his expression and what Bridget had told them yesterday, they all gathered that Laurel had hit a really rough spot.

  Moira and Mrs. Kemp fixed a picnic basket and Mr. Kemp told him about the cove. Christy said it was a great spot for photography.

  By the time Laurel showered and came out to the family room, Jacob was ready with her tray. As she ate he told her they were going out for the day on the boat. She changed her shoes but didn’t say anything while she poured herself a
cup of coffee and swallowed some oatmeal.

  An hour later they anchored in the cove and he turned to her.

  “Uncle Paul called me this morning. Neither he nor Aunt Grace knew anything about the baby.”

  She looked at him and though her eyes flooded with tears, she didn’t look away.

  Her expression twisted the knife in his heart but all he said was, “As you know, right after combat training you married a fellow officer, Walt Brighton. You never mentioned the baby to anyone. Uncle Paul had your medical records checked and he says you miscarried two months after you married. Your commanding officer at the time said you did not report the pregnancy till you miscarried so you may not have known you were pregnant. Women who get pregnant have to return stateside and maybe that made you want to keep quiet about the pregnancy but knowing you the way I do now, I think you didn’t know. Women on active duty often miss their periods sometimes for the whole time they are deployed.”

  She stared at the water trying to make sense of all Jacob told her. As usual she couldn’t remember any of it. She hated the way her mind was behaving. More than anything she wanted to know she hadn’t done anything to jeopardize the tiny life growing within her. Uncle Paul had said she was a go-getter that she’d never let anything stop her on her way to becoming one of the best combat cameramen around. Had she seen being pregnant as an end to her career and had she chosen to end her pregnancy. After she’d lost the baby nothing had stood between her and continuing her career. Could she really have been that tough? Was that why Walter been in such a hurry to divorce her? Would she ever know the truth now?

  “You’re not the kind of person who would choose your career over your baby Laurel.” As usual Jacob had 20/20 intuition where she was concerned. “You loved what you did but I know you would not have chosen to end your baby’s life for the sake of your career.”

  She blinked the tears away.

  “Our actions are determined by whom we are not only by what happens to us. Who we are determines what we do in every situation we are faced with. No matter how we react in a situation there is a tiny part of us always adhering to who we are and that’s the part guiding our actions. Five soldiers on a walk will notice a child by their camp. Only one will stop and try to talk with the child, give him or her a piece of gum or candy, look for the child the next day. The rest will walk on. They are all acting on the ‘who we are’ principle.” I will bet you ten thousand dollars that when your memory returns you’ll find out you did not get rid of your baby even at the cost of the work you loved.”