The Full Experience

by Dawn Doyle

  Beck never received any calls. Even after calling back, neither returned his call.

  So everything Kato had said was true about Raven, and also his best friend was ignoring him. If he had to guess that was because his girlfriend, Ava, was Raven’s best friend.

  Beck rolled over on his bed and punched his pillow. He needed a distraction. Something to take his mind off her.

  But with what he didn’t know.

  “Beck, can I come in honey?” his mom asked as she knocked on the door.

  “Sure,” he replied, sitting up.

  The door opened, and his mom walked in, wearing an outfit that could only mean it was a flying visit.

  “How are you feeling?” she asked, sitting down next to him. She put her arm around his shoulders and hugged him into her.

  Even though it was nice of his mom, it didn’t feel as loving as it should have felt for him.

  “Still pretty much devastated,” he muttered, looking at his hands in his lap.

  “Well, you need to get up and get out there again,” she smiled. “There are plenty more girls out there who would jump at the chance at being with somebody as handsome as you.”

  But they’re not Raven. I only want Raven.

  Beck clenched his jaw.

  He didn’t want anybody at all but his mind kept telling him that Raven was still the one.

  “I don’t want to, mom, can you leave it now. Please?” he asked, tired of hearing the same thing.

  “This isn’t good for a man. Staying holed up in his bedroom. You need to… You know.”

  He knew what she was talking about.

  Sex.

  His stomach turned with nausea.

  The idea of having sex with somebody other than Raven still felt like cheating. It shouldn’t because she’d betrayed him and he should just bounce back to the way he was.

  But he couldn’t. He didn’t want to. He still wanted her.

  In college, he wouldn’t have fucked all of those girls -not as many as people thought- if he knew Raven had feelings for him. All he’d wanted was her, but he thought he’d never get her. The only girl that he’d wanted to kiss, and from the moment they’d met.

  He never kissed because he never wanted any feelings to be involved. Fucking was just fulfilling the base need for release. Girls approached him, willingly, and he never wanted to give anybody the impression that he wanted anything else.

  He’d only wanted that with Raven, but she never wanted him.

  Seeing her look at him like she did, knowing he’d been with other girls; he hadn’t liked it. He didn’t stop though because she didn’t want him. No matter how much he tried, and fucked up, to show her that he did. He was obsessed with her just the same.

  Jerking off wasn’t an option so he did what he needed, only when he needed to.

  He genuinely thought he never had that chance with Raven until she knocked on his door.

  It had been everything he imagined, and more, as he made love to her.

  He wanted to kiss her so badly but managed to restrain himself. He didn’t want to freak her out more than she probably was already.

  He’d honestly thought things would be different until he came out of the bathroom just as his door was closing.

  She’d left. Used him, just like the others, and he’d never felt so cheap in all his life.

  That’s why he had the rules. He’d never wanted to make anybody feel that way, because he never did, until that moment. Not that he thought he was so amazing that girls fell in love with him; far from it, he knew it was all they wanted. He just didn’t want them to think he wanted them for more, when he didn’t.

  He wanted somebody he couldn’t have.

  “Are you listening, Beck?” his mom asked, bringing him out of his thoughts. “I said you need to go out and meet people.”

  “I don’t want to,” he replied. “I don’t need to meet anybody. I just want to stay here and study. That’s my focus.”

  Studying only helped so much. When it came to Economics, it tore him apart all over again.

  He was never going to recover from Raven breaking his heart.

  “Well, ok, honey. I’m just worried about you.” His mom stood, and smoothed down her white trousers. “Well, I’m meeting Ginny for lunch. I’ll see you later.” Then she was gone, and he was alone.

  Beck lay back down, staring at the ceiling as a lone tear fell from his eye.

  No. He wasn’t going to recover any time soon.

  Four months had passed since leaving, and Beck received his graduation certificate. He didn’t want a ceremony, and he didn’t want a big deal being made out of it.

  He’d told his mom ‘I graduated with honors’ as if it was an everyday conversation.

  She seemed genuinely happy for him, hugging him tight and kissing his cheek.

  “I’m so proud of you sweetheart!” she beamed. “Now you can start living your life again.”

  Those were similar words she’d used after his dad had cheated on her…with multiple women. She was devastated because for some weird reason, she’d loved Jack so much. It had taken her two years to pick herself up. ‘I can start living my life again,’ she’d said, but he wondered whether it was her or the anti-depressants talking.

  Once Beck had called his dad to say he’d gotten his certificate, he said ‘congratulations’ followed quickly by ‘when are you coming back?’

  He hadn’t been close to ready, but Jack had called every couple of days for the next two months after that. Beck just wanted to stay for a little longer. He’d been so busy going between working out and studying, that he needed some room to breathe. However, Raven had never left his mind. She was still in there as strong as ever.

  He’d given in a week later, and moved to his dad’s house, being thrown into work immediately. He’d been there for three weeks when it had gotten too much.

  His dad was overbearing and cold as usual. His personality fitted that of a narcissist, and nothing ever mattered but the business and himself.

  It would have been graduation the previous day, and Beck had been thinking about Raven again, and how she would’ve looked in her cap and gown as she walked on the stage to receive her certificate. Along with Donnie, Ava, Kerry, Leila and the others.

  He needed to get out and get some air, so getting onto his car, he went for a drive.

  Beck had driven for almost an hour when he slowed down towards some traffic lights. He did a double take when he saw a silver car that looked like Donnie’s parked up outside a bar.

  He looked at the license plate.

  It was Donnie’s.

  His shattered heart jumped into his throat and before he knew it, he was walking into the bar, seeing a group of them celebrating graduation. A head above the back of a green chair, with shiny black hair.

  Raven.

  Bonus scene.

  Kato’s comeuppance.

  “Why am I here? I haven’t done anything!” Kato yelled as he was brought into the Dean’s office. Georgio had gotten there a few minutes earlier, waiting for the other officers to bring him in.

  The Dean had kindly vacated the room for Kato’s ‘interrogation’.

  “Hello, Bruce,” Georgio said as he held his hand out to the chair in front for him to sit.

  “Who are you? What’s going on?” Kato asked, looking between the other officers.

  “I’ll start by introducing myself, then maybe you’ll understand why you’re here.” Georgio rolled up his sleeves. “I’m Detective Valiente.”

  Kato’s eyes bugged and his face turned as white as a sheet.

  “Raven’s dad?” he almost whispered.

  “Yes, I am,” Georgio smiled slyly.

  “I didn’t do anything to her, I swear.”

  “Oh but you did. Her and Beck Traynor.” Georgio didn’t think it was possible for someone to turn whiter, but Kato managed it. “I know everything, Bruce. It took a while for them to realize what had happened, but they did.”

 
; “It was only meant to be a joke,” Kato spluttered. “I didn’t know he would leave. I just wanted to mess with him.”

  “By making a false report about my daughter? Telling her boyfriend lies about her? Care to tell me why you thought that was necessary?”

  “Beck’s an asshole and he’s not good enough for Ray. He threw it in my face when they started dating. After everything he did, she still went with him,” Kato said, his hands raising to the side.

  “And that’s your business, how?”

  “I was always nice to her, but she wouldn’t give me the time of fucking day,” he snarled.

  Georgio knew Kato had a thing for Raven, he knew what had gone down between them, and was glad Raven had kicked his ass.

  “My daughter is a very smart girl when it comes to figuring people out, Bruce. If she didn’t give you the time of day, then you didn’t deserve it. Beck, however, must have because even after your sick joke, they’re together. In fact, Beck’s talking houses and rings. He’s actually a really nice guy.” Georgio smiled. He lied about the houses and rings, but he actually did like Beck after meeting him. Seeing how he was with Raven didn’t give him any causes for concern.

  “Then you need your head testing if you think that,” Kato sneered.

  Georgio clenched his fists together.

  “Over twenty years in the police force makes me an exceptional judge of people, Bruce. For instance, I don’t like you, and I’m betting everything I have that I’m one hundred percent abso-fucking-lutely correct on that assumption.”

  “You’re definitely correct, sir.” One of the officers commented.

  “See? Even the other officers dislike you.” Kato squirmed in his seat. “The thing is, Bruce, because of what you did, Beck had to leave. Do you have any idea what that can do to somebody’s life? My daughter was devastated and turned to self destruction. She started getting into trouble and eventually dropped out. She was a fucking mess because of you!” Georgio yelled. “Do know what it’s like to think that somebody you love hates you? Do you even care that her heart was broken because she thought he’d left her?”

  “But it wasn’t true! He only had to speak to Ray to find out.”

  “That’s not the point, Bruce. Do you know his father? What he's like?” Kato shook his head. “Then you wouldn’t understand that because he thought the Dean had a copy of the report, Beck had to tell his father before he found out. He would have to leave or be kicked out, because that’s what those types of reports result in.”

  “Again, it wasn’t true!”

  Georgio was growing more annoyed with every word that came out of Kato’s mouth.

  “But he thought it was! Don’t you get that or are you too thick to understand? He thought it was true, you told him the Dean had a copy, he ‘knew’ he was going to be kicked out so he had to tell his father, to warn him. Naturally, his father went ape shit and sent a car to pick him up.”

  “I didn’t know that was going to happen. I thought he would call Raven, and they’d argue, that’s all.”

  “No. You preyed on their relationship and exaggerated things that had happened between them, knowing that if you brought your cousin into it, it would help the lies along. You knew exactly what you were doing. You were jealous of them, and you wanted to sabotage their relationship for kicks.” Georgio wanted to drag him across the table and beat the shit out of him.

  Kato hung his head.

  Georgio looked up as the door opened; Kato’s parents had arrived.

  “You can explain to your parents what you did.”

  Kato’s parents were picking him up from the campus, but an officer had called them ahead, letting them know where to get him.

  Georgio sat back with his arms folded as he watched Kato, in tears, telling his parents that he’d made a false report and had Veronica help him.

  His parents were livid and Georgio couldn’t help but smile when they told him just how disappointed they were in him. Georgio hadn’t finished, though. He still had one more piece of information to hit him with.

  “Ok, you can go,” he said after the shouting had subsided. He waited until they were almost out of the door to give them the good news. “Oh, I thought you should know; you got your cousin fired.”

  “What?” Kato’s parents said in unison.

  “Veronica. She lost her job because she helped you,” he said directly to Kato. “Still think it was just a joke?”

  Acknowledgements

  Firstly, I would like to thank my readers for purchasing a copy of this book.

  Those of you who are new to my books, hi! Those who’ve followed me since Welcome To New Haven, hello again and thank you for your continued faith in my stories. It’s because of your support that I keep doing what I love to do

  Now, the mushy parts…

  Thank you to my husband, Dan, who sat and listened whilst I talked to him (or at him) about my characters and what they were up to. “But I just need to tell you this bit!”

  I’m so sorry for that, but you know, it was necessary.

  Thank you to my ever fabulous Mother-in-law, Jan, who listened to me and dissected my characters’ personalities (perks of having a behavioral therapist in the family) and showing me that what I was hoping to capture in a character, had transferred into my writing.

  My bestie, Sarah, who read everything I gave her and gave me her feedback, as well at trying to get over her food poisoning, and also her chronic back pain. There should be awards for that.

  Pavan for also reading my chapters as they came to life, and saying I was mean when I left her hanging for information. That’s what I was going for!

  My Beta reader, Kellane Mitchener. I am so grateful you took time out to read and give feedback on the story. You rock!

  To my little angels who always tell me that they’re proud of me for achieving what I have.

  I love you all.

  Dawn.

  Other Books by Dawn Doyle

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