Can't Lose Me

by Amanda Torrey

  Mackenzie hastily pulled her hair back into a looser bun, wincing slightly at the way the hair pulled against her temples, but feeling wildly and inappropriately provocative for some inane reason.

  “I called you in to discuss more than your performance. Which is flawless, by the way.”

  She blushed at his compliment and at the fact that she noticed his olive skin turning pink, too.

  “The praise is genuine. The staff can’t say enough great things about you.”

  “I’m honored. Thank you.”

  “I’ve noticed you’ve been coming in a lot, even when you’re not scheduled.”

  Her heart rate increased and her tongue dried up.

  “I know you’ve been short-staffed and I just wanted to help out.”

  Antoine sat on the edge of his desk.

  “You are a lovely woman.”

  His praise started to make her feel itchy all over. She appreciated gratitude for a job well done, but this interaction was making her feel slightly dirty.

  She had to disengage, but she didn’t know how. If she wasn’t mistaken, her boss was flirting with her.

  And she was a married woman.

  “I should get back to work. Thank you for the positive feedback.”

  “Wait, Kenzie.”

  She stilled at his use of the name her husband always used. True, other people shortened her name, but it felt too familiar for a boss/employee relationship.

  There was something very unique about the way her husband said her name with a special sort of reverence and appreciation.

  Antoine’s voice held some of the same notes, but they washed over her like rusty water from old pipes. She was left feeling unclean and in need of a power washing.

  “This is a little uncomfortable.” He cleared his throat.

  Then don’t do it.

  “I’m just going to put this out there, and your answer will in no way affect your employment.”

  Oh, god. Oh, god. Ohgodohgodohgod.

  “Well, you know, Valentine’s Day is around the corner—”

  “Oh, sure, I can absolutely work on Valentine’s Day.”

  He cleared his throat again and fiddled with his tie.

  “That’s not where I was leading…”

  “Did you want me to make decorations for the common areas? Or maybe go all high-school-throwback and deliver anonymous Valentine’s to the residents? That would be a blast.”

  “Good ideas. You can discuss them with the activities director. But what I want to know is—”

  “Mr. Suarez…” What could she say to stop him from saying what he was about to say? Words failed her for not the first time this decade. He didn’t seem to be picking up on the fact that she was sending him clues to back off.

  “Are we back to that? I thought we had made progress with you finally calling me Antoine.” His eyes twinkled.

  She closed her eyes and willed the breath to reach her shriveling lungs.

  “I’m just going to say it. Ask it, really. Can I take you out for Valentine’s Day? Not as an employee. As a date.”

  Shit. The words were out. There was no sending them back. There was no pretending she didn’t hear them. Her job here would come to an end in a blazing heap of automobile lodged into the side of a rock mountain.

  She paused. Perhaps for too long. She studied his face—handsome, rugged, nice features. If she were a different kind of woman in a different situation—a single lady—she’d accept, no doubt. He was kind, fair, genuine and compassionate with the residents.

  But he wasn’t Gabe.

  And she wasn’t single.

  And he was a good enough guy to deserve an answer.

  She fiddled with her empty ring finger, once again missing the ring she hadn’t worn since she left it with the departure note on the kitchen table.

  A voice over the intercom declared a Code White emergency, which sent Antoine and Mackenzie running to the room specified to join the nurses in helping the resident who had fallen.

  An emergency trip to the ER as a ride-along was a sure way to avoid the awkwardness of Antoine’s proposition.

  The poor guy was probably beyond embarrassed. It had taken courage to approach her, and she hoped she hadn’t been too cold.

  Ugh. Dealing with men was her absolute worst skill. Was it possible to have a negative skill? She knew she was good at some things, but dealing with men? Nope. Definitely not.

  She gently squeezed Mrs. Leonard’s hand while Mrs. Leonard moaned at the pain as the ambulance soared over bumps. With every tear that slipped over the rough terrain of Mrs. Leonard’s face, Mackenzie doubled her efforts to be soothing and to reassure her that everything would be all right.

  The nursing home’s evening housekeeper picked Mackenzie up from the hospital an hour later when Mrs. Leonard was admitted and her family had joined her.

  Emotionally and physically exhausted, Mackenzie clocked out and shuffled her tired feet to her car. She loved what she was doing, but the exhaustion was starting to catch up with her.

  The icky feelings simmering over inside her threatened to spill onto the pavement as she walked up her walkway, hating herself for wishing she’d find Gabe happily asleep. She’d love to snuggle up to his bare chest and pretend the day hadn’t happened. To rewind and live in the moment. The blissful, pleasurable, loving moments he gifted her with every day.

  As soon as she tiptoed into the house, the living room light flickered on, and there was Gabe, her Gabe, wide awake and snuggling with two of her cats.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Gabe hadn’t known what time she’d be home, but he was glad he had managed to pick up the cats and get them settled in before Kenzie walked in.

  He was also beyond glad that he had waited up to see her reaction.

  Shock, a red face, and then the biggest, brightest smile he had seen on her in over a year.

  She had smiled for him, but for her cats she became radiant.

  “Gabe! What are my kitties doing here?”

  She ran over and knelt on the floor beside the couch, calling the cats to her in a voice that could only be described as maternal. The black one immediately responded to her voice and rubbed itself on Kenzie’s face. The orange striped one stayed planted on Gabe’s shoulder. The white, insanely fluffy one remained on his feet, where he was starting to cramp up. He never would have imagined being enslaved by a four-legged creature, but there he was.

  “Where’s Georgie?”

  “Is that the tiger one? He’s been hiding since I let him out of the carrier.”

  “Oh, my poor girl. I’ll find her.”

  Within minutes, she had the tiger thing purring in her arms. He could hear the rumble from across the room.

  “I can’t tell you how happy this surprise makes me.”

  “I can tell. But I have to admit, I might be getting a little jealous.”

  “Oh, I’ll rub you down later, mister.”

  She said it in the cute voice she had been using for the cats, but it didn’t stop his erection from growing.

  “Did you notice anything on the table?” he hinted, amused by her focused attention on the cats.

  Her eyes lit up when she glanced over at the oversized bouquet of flowers he had picked up.

  He had been an ass to her, and he didn’t want any bad feelings to linger.

  “What is all of this for?”

  He didn’t miss the glimmer of moisture gathering in her eyes, but he didn’t want her to shed any tears.

  Dislodging the cat from his legs (and earning an indignant meow and a tail-in-the-air salute), he gathered Kenzie in his arms, surprised that he didn’t mind that she still hugged the tiger cat, even if his eyes began to itch.

  “I’m sorry if I seemed dismissive earlier. That discussion caught me off-guard.”

  She studied his face, and he wished he knew what the hell she was thinking. How much should he say? What should remain unsaid? Why the fuck hadn’t he read some of those damned self-help
books his buddy had recommended?

  “I should have thought about how random I was being,” she uttered through a teary smile.

  He pulled her close. She shifted the cat to one arm and pressed her body to his.

  He’d never tire of the way she fit so perfectly against him, as if her shape had been molded and cut as a complimentary piece. They were a puzzle in more ways than one.

  “You are designed to nurture. I get it. What we went through was horrific. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”

  Her bones seemed to dissolve as she leaned against him more.

  “But that’s the past, Kenz. Let’s leave it there.”

  He pulled away slightly, holding her upper arms. With one hand, he lifted her chin so she’d look at him.

  He didn’t like the sad emptiness he saw there.

  He had to make it better. He couldn’t lose her again.

  “We have a future to look forward to, my love.”

  He planted a kiss on her soft lips. The cat jumped out of her arm and she wrapped her now-free hands around his neck, pulling him in. He had meant for the kiss to remain sweet and chaste, but her tongue traced his lower lip, beckoning him to open. He did, allowing his natural aggressiveness to come forward in spite of his intentions.

  Their tongues danced to the beat of every old memory they shared. Every passion-filled moment. Every first they had experienced.

  He slipped the elastic hairband out of her hair, tossing it to the floor and running his hands through the golden silk he loved so much. His hands roamed over her back, over her hips, slipped into the back of her pants. The appreciation he felt for elastic waist-banded scrubs was intense. Instant, easy access.

  She pushed her pelvis against him, shifting until she cradled the piece of him she so easily resurrected. Day in and day out.

  He growled into her mouth, grinding into her as if his survival depended on consuming her. Or having her consume him. Didn’t matter—they were two pieces of the same meal.

  “Get me out of these clothes,” she demanded.

  Like the gentleman he tried to be, he broke the kiss long enough to lift the shirt over her head, then cupped her heavy breasts in his hands and kissed the top of each globe. Her skin was warm and smooth against his lips. His tongue slipped past the lace at the top of her bra, finding her puckered nipple and licking it until it tightened even more. She threw her head back and moaned deep into her gut, fueling his need and making him want to pound into her at that moment.

  But he had some making up to do, and he would savor her until her throat was hoarse from moaning.

  As soon as he unclipped her bra, he slid it off and tossed it to the side, barely aware of the fact that he managed to piss off a cat when the bra landed on the animal. Mackenzie’s laugh was worth the interruption as she pulled away to disentangle her agitated cat.

  He couldn’t take his eyes off her body as she bent down, her gorgeous tits moving in ways that made him burn.

  Once the cat was rescued, she stared at him from several feet away, making his blood boil with the intensity of her stare. He knew he was thinking like a chick, but he was mesmerized by her eyes and could get lost in them forever. With her waves tumbling messily over her shoulders and her bare breasts forcing him to break eye contact, he grew harder and harder. Her nipples grew rosier under his watch, and his mouth watered. He had to taste them. He had to taste her. He had things he desperately wanted to do to her.

  She smiled as he stalked toward her, all eyes on his dessert. As he approached, she lowered her pants and kicked them to the side, leaving her standing in nothing but a tiny little scrap of a thong. He had to admit that he loved this new trend of hers.

  The less she had on, the better.

  And even though he loved what was beneath the thong more than anything else, he couldn’t deny how fucking hot she looked with that little bitty cloth covering the goods.

  He scooped her up and carried her to the room, kicking the door shut to keep the cats out. He could deal with a little cuddle, but he wasn’t about to invite them to watch what he was going to do.

  He plopped her on the bed, savoring the sight of her breasts falling slightly to the side as her chest heaved with anticipation. He ran a finger over her panties, smiling at her wetness. Still standing over her, he slipped his finger around the cloth and found her moist warmth, teasing her with the rough pad of his finger as she wiggled and moaned and gripped the sheets with both of her hands.

  He continued to tease, unwilling to give her relief from the torture.

  “Gabe, you still have pants on.”

  He slipped a second finger in with the first, finding her entrance and plunging in as he bit the inside of his mouth to remind himself to maintain control.

  He increased his stroking and watched her thrash on the bed. He had to reach into his own pants to touch himself, because the pressure was getting painful.

  She opened her eyes and watched as he touched himself. She licked her lips and reached out to join him.

  His thumb rasped across her swollen clit as she traced a finger over the head of his dick. He struggled to maintain control, but started pumping a little harder in spite of his intentions.

  She wrapped her hand around his, stroking along with him up his length. He nearly exploded at the eroticism of the act, but he managed to get himself to calm the fuck down before he came all over her.

  He pulled her hand away and stuck his dick back in his sweatpants, fighting the urge to give her what she begged for. Instead, he tore her panties off—he’d probably regret their loss, but he’d buy her new ones—and knelt between her legs.

  His tongue traced the spots his fingers had been taking care of, relishing her scent and loving her taste.

  He nibbled and sucked, paying close attention to her response to know what felt best to her. When she grabbed his head and held it in one spot, he knew he had hit the jackpot.

  His fingers plunged into her while his mouth worked her clit, pumping her until she tightened her thighs against his ears and came with an intensity that rivaled his enjoyment.

  He practically sang with the pleasure of giving her pleasure.

  Holy fuck, how had he lived without her?

  She collapsed against the bed and pushed his hand away from her now-sensitive parts. Since she wasn’t ready for him to touch her there again quite yet, he moved to her tits, thrilled to have some playtime with his best friends. He nestled his clothed erection against her heat, not trusting himself to remove his clothes until he got her worked up and ready.

  Gabe growled against her nipple as he sucked, his tongue drawing circles around her sensitive spot. He pulled on her other nipple, marveling at the way her hips rose to welcome his erection into her heat.

  He pulled away long enough to rid himself of his pants, then perched at her entrance.

  He allowed his tip to ease into her, watching her eyes roll back in her head as she lifted her legs around his waist to accommodate him.

  He paused, wanting to savor the closeness before losing himself to the ascension.

  She wouldn’t have any of it. With strength he never would have guessed she possessed, she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him down until he was buried deep inside her.

  His eyes rolled back this time. He tried desperately to maintain the control he had promised himself he’d have, but she started undulating beneath him, tightening around him, and he was a goner.

  He reached between him to tease her clit while he thrust in and out in slow, then frantic, waves.

  She scratched his back and bit his shoulder as she exploded.

  He threw his head back and shouted what sounded like a battle cry before easing down to rain kisses on her shoulder and neck and earlobe.

  He rolled over, bringing her with him. He loved the way she tossed her leg over his and snuggled into his side, swirling her finger around his chest. She teased his nipples until they peaked, then laughed as he reached over to do the same to hers.
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  “Thank you for bringing my kitties here.”

  “They belong with you.”

  He tried to ignore the scratching of his eyes and the need to sneeze that thinking about them brought about. If keeping her happy meant suffering through his allergies, he’d pop allergy pills every day for the rest of his life and pray for the best.

  ***

  Gabe would never pretend to understand women, but even he wasn’t ignorant enough to miss the signs that something was up with Kenzie. She seemed to be growing chillier by the moment, except when they were hot between the sheets.

  What the hell was going on?

  He couldn’t crack her code, but her face paled when he suggested they shower together before work. And then she insisted on driving her own car to the print shop, even though she didn’t have to work at that other godforsaken place after they closed up shop and they could have shared the ride.

  It had to be that place.

  Working two jobs was too much for her.

  He stopped on the way to work to pick up a coffee for him and a mint hot chocolate for her, and when he handed it to her, he mentioned his theory.

  She didn’t have to bite his damn head off. Why the hell wouldn’t she be happy about him telling her she didn’t need to work that other job? That he’d take care of her financially? What the hell was wrong with that?

  “You own half the business—I’m not being a chauvinist, Kenz. Jesus. It’s not like I said you should stay home barefoot and pregnant!”

  As soon as the words left his mouth, he cursed.

  “Kenzie, I didn’t…”

  She looked over his shoulder and plastered a smile on her face, though her cheeks were blazing red.

  “Look—we have a customer.”

  The customer in question struggled to get through the door with a baby on one hip, a folder of papers in one hand while she haphazardly steered the stroller with the other.

  The papers nearly plunged to the floor, but Gabe caught them before the entire folder slipped out of her fingers.

  Kenzie was right behind, and the grateful woman practically threw the baby at Kenzie. “I’m sorry. She refused to sit in her stroller.”