Declare (Declan Reede: The Untold Story #4)

by Michelle Irwin

  Alyssa turned and gave me a questioning look that was filled with concern, no doubt trying to seek out the lie in my words, but I nodded to indicate she should go. That I’d be okay. After all, it was what she’d come to Brisbane for.

  Once she’d moved off, I sat in the corner of the waiting room, trying to blend into the walls so no one noticed me. I felt like an interloper on a private family time.

  After a short time with Ruth, Phoebe came and planted herself on my lap and gave me a hug. “I missed you, Daddy,” she whispered.

  “I missed you too, baby.” I hugged her closer. “I hope you were good for Mummy?”

  She nodded and smiled. I could tell she was getting bored and restless, so I grabbed a small pile of magazines from under the waiting room table—the most recent one was from Christmas the previous year—and began to make up little stories about the people in them.

  “Look, Daddy! It’s you!” she squealed as she recognised me on one of the covers.

  In the fraction of a second it took for me to look at the magazine, I hoped like hell it was the issue of Woman’s Idea from when Alyssa and I had gone for our joint interview.

  Instead, I found myself staring at the cover of Gossip Weekly and the photo of me sandwiched between Tillie and Talia—the two bitches who’d had a big hand in securing my public fall from grace.

  I shoved the magazine to the bottom of the pile and tried to distract Phoebe with other stories. I resorted to looking at the Christmas edition of Woman’s Idea; at least Christmas held positive memories for me. After all, it was when Alyssa had agreed to marry me.

  Finally, Alyssa reappeared in the waiting room, looking like the world had been lifted from her shoulders. She gave me a small smile as she found her way over and sat on the chair beside me. “I’m sorry I dragged you away from your race meeting for nothing.”

  I put my hand up to silence her. “It wasn’t nothing.” I wanted to say it could have easily gone the other way, but I didn’t want to be the reason the stress returned. “I wanted to be here.” For you. “How is she?”

  She rested her head against my shoulder. “She’s fine. They are keeping her in for a while just to be on the safe side, but the baby seems to be fine too.”

  “That’s good,” I murmured, knowing Alyssa would have been close to inconsolable if Ruby had lost her baby.

  “Mum’s asked if we want to stay at their house,” she whispered, knowing that under normal circumstances I would’ve preferred a hotel.

  But I was well aware we weren’t in Brisbane under normal circumstances. I nodded, knowing that accepting would mean that our accommodation would be one less thing for everyone to worry about.

  Over the next few hours, Curtis drove home to get their spare child seat and then drove the three of us home. Then we had the news that Ruby was being released from the hospital, and Ruth refused to let Ruby go home alone, despite the fact that Josh wouldn’t leave her side.

  In the end, Alyssa and I went to Josh and Ruby’s house while everyone else stayed with Curtis and Ruth. Because neither Alyssa nor I had eaten since before our flights, we grabbed takeout on the way to our temporary accommodation.

  We were all so exhausted that we crashed into bed almost the instant we had finished eating. Alyssa fell asleep quickly in my arms, drained from the stressful day she’d had. As I watched her sleeping, I rested my hand on her stomach, trying to imagine what it had been like for her when she had been pregnant with the twins.

  After experiencing her grief firsthand over the course of the day, I was even more disappointed with myself than ever that I hadn’t been there for her during that time. I vowed to never let that happen again.

  I woke early the next day and caught a cab back to the airport, leaving Alyssa to spend some more time with her family. I arrived back at the track just in time to jump in my Mini for the second race of the meeting. It was a reverse grid race, so I had to fight my way through the pack. I came in third, but somehow I couldn’t find the same enthusiasm that I’d enjoyed the previous day.

  Instead, my mind was filled with concern for Alyssa.

  On Saturday night, I rang Alyssa at her parents’ house and got all the latest news on Ruby. The doctors said that she was still high risk and that she needed to relax, putting her fainting spell down to a combination of heat, exhaustion, and being pregnant.

  On Sunday, I woke early and dragged my arse to the track. My final race of the meeting was over before 9:00 a.m., and I’d managed to wrestle another first place in that one.

  It meant that I was already in first place on the Micro Challenge leader board. I was able to muster a little more enthusiasm now that I had the knowledge that Ruby—and therefore Alyssa—was all right. But I still missed Alyssa and Phoebe terribly and wanted to be with them. It was almost a relief when the weekend was finally over and it was time to go home.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THREE DAY BREAK

  BEFORE I KNEW it, March was almost over—passing in a flash of repairs, race meets, and a lot less time with the family than I would have liked. The Grand Prix had raced past just like the rest of the month. Luckily for me, and for my honeymoon plans, I had taken pole position at the Melbourne meet. It meant I only needed one more pole out of my next two races to secure our getaway.

  The end of March saw the arrival of Easter coming at me fast. During the lead-up, it dawned on me that it was going to be a year of firsts for me. It was my first Easter as a father, and I’d be damned if I was going to screw it up.

  The Thursday before we broke for the long weekend was a particularly difficult one.

  It was the first of April—April Fools. Around the workshop, there were countless opportunities for April Fools pranks, and I had to stay on my toes the entire time. There was glue on seats and phones, thumbtacks in tool boxes, and fake spiders on toilet seats, to name just a few. The muffins Alyssa and I had made the previous night—baked with salt instead of sugar—went over a real treat in the staff kitchen at morning tea. I found myself still chuckling about the look on everyone’s face as I packed up for the day.

  Even though Alyssa and I usually carpooled, I’d driven myself in to work that day so I could hit the shops on the way home in preparation for my first Easter Bunny gig. I had the whole scenario planned out in my head, and I hoped it would work exactly as I imagined.

  By the time I left the shop, I had four huge bags containing more chocolate than Phoebe could probably eat in a year, but I didn’t care. I was going to make sure my little girl had an Easter to remember—screw the cost . . . and the consequences. As soon as I got home, I hid the bags at the top of the pantry.

  The long weekend was going to be exactly the break I needed from my hectic schedule. It was the break we all needed.

  On Good Friday, we all woke early and had hot cross buns for breakfast. Then the three of us headed to pick out one of the classic cars buried deep in my back shed. I decided on the ’67 Chevy Impala—black, of course.

  Alyssa almost gagged when she saw the size of it.

  “That’s huge!” she exclaimed loudly. “I’d ask if it were compensating for something, except I know it’s not. How does it even fit through that gap though?” she asked, pointing at the door to the garage.

  “It’s a tight squeeze, but the opening is more accommodating than it looks,” I said as seriously as I could, even though my mind had gone to dirty places. “You just have to pay extra attention as you slide it in.” I couldn’t stop the small chuckle that escaped me.

  Alyssa looked at me quizzically, and I burst out laughing.

  “What?” she asked.

  I shook my head and tried to stop the laughter. Phoebe looked at me with confusion all over her face but giggled at my laughter.

  Alyssa must have run through her words because just as my laughter died down, she giggled and shook her head. “You and your dirty mind!”

  “You were the one who said it, baby.”

  “I was talking about the car.” She was scarlet as
she quickly explained herself.

  I stepped up to her, kissed her forehead, and whispered, so quietly that only she would hear, “I know, but I’d be up for more practise fitting other big things into small spaces later if you like.”

  She slapped my chest lightly. “Let’s just go.”

  I nodded and shifted the car seat from my Monaro to the Impala. Then I left Alyssa to load Phoebe into the car as I opened the roller door.

  “This is a big car, Daddy,” Phoebe told me as I eased it out of the shed.

  “It’s a fast car too,” I told her. “I’ll show you later.” I grinned at her in the rear-view mirror.

  “No, you won’t,” Alyssa insisted.

  I pouted. “I’ll take it on the highway. I’ll make sure she’s safe.”

  I eyed Alyssa out of the corner of my eye.

  “Please?”

  She sighed.

  “I wouldn’t do anything to hurt either of you, but you gotta have a little fun, right?” I added a shrug and tried to throw her a smouldering look—anything to tilt the argument my way. It’d been too long since I’d driven any of my collection, and I really wanted to stretch the legs of the Impala.

  “We’ll see.” The way she said it was so final, I doubted she’d say okay.

  Even though the conversation was closed, I couldn’t help spinning the tyres as I left the driveway. A grin was planted firmly on my face as I did. I hadn’t had much of an opportunity to drive my other cars between my responsibilities at work and home, the study I had to do at TAFE for my apprenticeship, and trying to assist in the planning of the wedding as much as I could—especially with Ruby on enforced bedrest for most of the day.

  Now that the opportunity to put my foot down just a smidge had presented itself, I was going to take full advantage.

  I stopped to fill the tank up—I tried to leave all my cars with minimal fuel so it wouldn’t go bad in the tank—and then we drove to the beach. I intentionally drove around the long way, ensuring I got to spend as much quality time as I could with my big, black beauty of a beast.

  When we arrived at the beach, we claimed a small patch of sand for ourselves. I spent the morning making sandcastles with Phoebe before she knocked them over or poured water on them, leaving them twisted and destroyed. Each time she busted one, I would pretend to chase her, and she would run away giggling. Alyssa sat on a blanket beside us, reading a book, catching some sun, and occasionally giving suggestions for a better design for my castles.

  Once Phoebe started to complain that she was hungry, we walked across the road to grab fish and chips for lunch. We sat watching the passers-by as we ate, talking about everything and nothing, just reconnecting in ways that we hadn’t had the chance to during our usually hectic work weeks.

  After we’d all finished eating, and waited the appropriate time according to Alyssa, we returned to the beach for a splash in the waves. We spent the better part of a few hours in the sand and surf. The best part of the day was listening to Phoebe’s squeals as she darted into the retreating water before running from it as the next wave came.

  By five, we’d had enough sun, sand, and waves, so we headed back to the car. I made sure everyone brushed the sand off before climbing in. Before we hit the road, we scouted for a restaurant for dinner. We picked a family-friendly place that had an all-you-can-eat buffet so Phoebe could be as fussy as she liked but still get fed.

  On the way home, I took the highways so I had plenty of time to give Phoebe a small taste of just how fast the car could be. She giggled as the momentum pressed her into the seat each time I nailed it. Before long though, her laughter had died off as she fell asleep in the back seat. Once that happened, I just cruised in the car with Alyssa at my side, my hand in her lap.

  When we got home, I slid the car into the shed then negotiated a sleeping Phoebe out of her car seat. As I carried her to bed, I realised it had been the best day I’d had in a long time. But more than that, I found myself regretting again that I’d missed so many of the early days of Phoebe’s life.

  For the first time, I felt a pang of something else, something I couldn’t quite put my finger on. A little niggle in the pit of my stomach that had made my eye follow the path of the expectant mothers during the day.

  I was certain it was just lingering concern for Ruby—even though she was fine.

  Once Phoebe was bathed and settled in bed, I followed the sound of the shower to find Alyssa in our en suite. I stripped quietly before climbing into the shower and wrapping my arm around her. She squealed and jumped at my touch before spinning around in my arms.

  “Sorry,” she murmured. “You startled me.”

  “I didn’t mean to.” I pulled her against me.

  “I was just distracted, I guess.”

  I glanced down at her naked chest before kissing the base of her neck. “I don’t blame you,” I whispered. “You’re all wet after all. I find I get very easily distracted when you’re all wet.” I growled the last word against her skin. I had only joined her in order to rinse off, but I was quickly getting new ideas.

  Alyssa mewed softly, and I took it as an encouragement to continue. I licked and sucked along her clavicle before kissing her neck softly. I traced a path up to the soft skin just underneath her ear, kissing it softly, and then murmured, “Very distracted, in fact.”

  I ran my tongue along the shell of her ear before breathing softly on her skin, and relished the way she shivered against my body.

  “But I don’t find my wetness to be a distraction,” she teased.

  I ran my hands along the sides of her body, pushing against her and pinning her to the tiles. “Do you find my wetness distracting?”

  She grinned wickedly then shook her head.

  I rested my lips against her ear and ran one hand down her body, cupping my hand against her pussy. “How about when I make you wet, is that distracting?”

  I slid my hand down to her arousal, slipping two fingers inside and curling them around to rub gently within her. I pulled my face back from her delectable skin to ensure that she was satisfied. The look on her face was one of such ecstasy that it was clear I was more than welcome to continue. I trailed my free hand over her sides and across her breasts before running it down onto her stomach. Without removing my fingers or slowing their pace, I kissed my way down her body before finding myself almost eye to eye with the small scar on her stomach—the tiny reminder of her pregnancy. I traced a finger across it lightly before kissing along her hip and touching my mouth to the apex of her thighs. I enjoyed the sensation of kissing her deeply while she raked her fingernails across my scalp. She was making such delectable sounds—amplified by the enclosed space of our en suite—that I was painfully hard long before I was done satisfying her.

  I removed my fingers and trailed my way back up her body with my mouth. As I stood, I lifted her legs one at a time, wrapping them around my waist and positioning myself to plunge deep into her. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, and I pushed her upper body harder against the tiles; her shoulders rested flush against the wall and her hips angled out perfectly toward me. I thrust into her hard and fast, my need for her driven by a desire for intimacy that I couldn’t explain. I needed to be near her—and in her. I needed her to surround me completely. I just needed her.

  I clutched her hips tightly, shifting her ever closer to me, until she came undone in my arms and fell against me, spent and exhausted. Then I carried her to the bed and made love to her again.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN: BUNNY DAY

  SATURDAY, WE SPENT the day around the house. I tinkered with a few of my cars because I’d been champing at the bit to apply some of what I had learned since starting my apprenticeship. Phoebe trailed around behind me, wearing a set of little overalls with her hair in pigtails and my tools in her pockets.

  She looked up at me, pleased as punch with herself for being like Daddy.

  “There’s something missing,” I said, staring at her thoughtfully.

  Her
gaze trailed over her outfit. “Nah-uh.”

  “Yah-huh,” I said. I ran my finger over the carburettor I was working on, and then ran a small trail of grease over her cheek.

  She squealed with laughter before declaring I was missing it too. Obliging her, I ran my finger over my cheek as well.

  I really enjoyed showing Phoebe a little bit more of that side of myself and was surprised about how proud I felt about the smallest things she did that demonstrated she was paying attention to me. Like when she explained to Alyssa what the rattle gun was for minutes after I had given a demonstration. I joked with her that she would be able to start an apprenticeship under me one day. The earnest look of pure excitement she gave me in response was enough to melt my heart.

  ON SUNDAY morning, I set my alarm super early and woke to do the Easter Bunny thing. I littered a course of Easter eggs around the house. It started with a trail of tiny eggs and powdered “rabbit tracks” from her bedroom door, leading to slightly bigger eggs down the staircase, and finally to a collection of large eggs and a rabbit in the living room.

  I padded quietly back to the bedroom and waited for Phoebe to wake up. I knew the instant that she realised what was waiting outside her door—I think the whole neighbourhood did. She squealed excitedly then ran into our room at top speed and skidded to a halt in front of our bed. She already had chocolate smeared across her mouth and a wide grin on her face.

  “The Easter Bunny camed!” she shouted excitedly. “He left me lots of chocolates! Dey’re everywhere! Come see!” She grabbed one of my hands and one of Alyssa’s and pulled us from the bed. I wrapped my arms around Alyssa and walked in step with her. I was grinning widely because she had yet to see my handiwork.

  “Oh, my . . .” Alyssa gasped as we came to the staircase and she saw the trail of eggs running down the stairs.

  I suppressed a chuckle and released her in order to chase after Phoebe who was halfway down the stairs and babbling about the rest of the eggs she got. She stopped on each stair, picked up the egg, and put it with the ever-growing pile that she was gathering in a makeshift basket she made with the front of her nightgown.