Reconstruct Me (Breakneck Book 5)

by Crystal Spears

  It angers me.

  Now she’s concerned about him?

  What about when she faked her death? Why wasn’t she concerned about him then.

  I give it ten more minutes before she’s over here trying to make conversation with me.

  I can’t get over the way she dismissed his love for her, as if it meant nothing to her at all. He gives his all when he cares about a person, and I’ve discovered this for myself in the past few weeks we’ve grown close. I mean something to him and he cherishes it. He adores everything and everyone he cares about, so it’s sad to see how she did him wrong in this regard.

  Five.

  Four.

  Three.

  Two.

  One.

  “Jinx, right?”

  I pull my sweater tighter around me. “Yes.”

  “I’m Lana.”

  Don’t roll your eyes, Jinx, don’t roll your eyes. “So, I’ve learned.”

  “Do you think he’ll come back tonight,” she asks.

  I motion for her to sit down with a flick of my hand and she does. “I don’t know. You have no idea the monster you’ve unleashed where his emotions are concerned, and that’s all I’m going to give you on him.”

  “Do you love him?”

  My mouth drops open in shock, and then I snap it shut. “As a person, yes. I’m not in love with him.”

  I do love him, but I’m not in love with him. There’s a huge difference.

  “You got here in the nick of time,” I smart off. “Congratulations.”

  Lana shivers from the wind, she should have put on a sweater before waiting outside in the middle of the night.

  “You’re not how everyone is describing you as.”

  “Polite?” I laugh. “I can’t apologize for my attitude towards you. I won’t either.”

  “At least you’re honest.”

  Unlike you, you wench!

  “Do you know I’ve been rearranging your memorial vase for months? I don’t even know you and that hurts me, my time healing was spent arranging flowers for someone who wasn’t even dead.” I snort. “Thanks.”

  “I apologize,” she whispers. “You don’t understand though.”

  This time I can’t stop my eyeroll. “Please. You have no idea what I went through to be stuck here. I may not understand your complete reasoning,” I say, looking her dead on. “But, we’re not that different from one another, Lana.”

  “I don’t understand,” she replies, confused.

  I sigh. “Did they tell you how I came to be here at Breakneck?”

  Lana shakes her head. “No one would say.”

  Another snort. “I’m surprised. These people love to gossip. Almost a year ago I went into Club Sated for an interview, I got the job, and when I was leaving with Piper, I got marked by an enemy.”

  “You were thrown into lockdown, weren’t you?” she sighs. “I’m sorry.”

  “Yes, then Piper and I screwed up, and that screw up led to our kidnapping and rapes.”

  Lana gasps, covering her mouth with one hand.

  “Pop found us, and I’ve been here ever since.” I shrug. “See. Breakneck has a hold of my life too. I had a meltdown about being stuck here yesterday.”

  “You’re not happy here now?”

  “I was.” I give her a stern look. “You sure you want to hear why I’m not anymore?”

  Lana drops her hand. “I’m sure.”

  “No one approved of mine and Pyro’s friendship. You being alive makes sense as to why Winter was mistreating me yesterday.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “You shouldn’t say sorry to me, you should say it to Pyro. Winter is the one who hurt me, not you.”

  The roar of a bike comes down the street, and I stand up when the gate opens.

  “He might be drunk,” I warn her. “If so, don’t provoke him, or you and I will have a problem.”

  “You know the person he is now,” she says quietly. “I’ll take your lead.”

  I highly doubt it.

  I don’t get the chance to even attempt a lead because once he’s off the bike and the prospects shut the gate, he’s storming into the clubhouse with a slight limp.

  I have a terrible feeling in my gut, and my fears are confirmed a minute later when he limps out of the building with an urn in his hands; Smokey following right behind.

  “Crap,” I mumble under my breath. “Prepare yourself.”

  “Makin’ friends, Shortcake,” he smarts off.

  “Redirect your anger, sir.” I point.

  For a brief moment, he fights a smile, and then his eyes flick to Lana, and it slips. “Who the fuck is in the urn, Lana?”

  I pull my lips together to keep my mouth shut.

  “I honestly don’t know, Stefan.”

  Pyro raises his arms and smashes the urn to the ground; shattering it to pieces, the ashes scattering in the wind. “It’s Pyro,” he growls. “You’ve lost the right to call me Stefan, long ago, when you faked your death and left me here with a broken fuckin’ heart!” he roars, stepping to her.

  Smokey grabs one of Pyro’s arms and jerks him back. “Calm the fuck down!”

  Pyro jerks out of his hold and takes off to the garage.

  “Jinx go check on him,” Smokey orders. “You’re the only one who hasn’t pissed him off today.”

  I haven’t pissed him off because I don’t keep life-changing secrets from him.

  When I get to the garage, Pyro is sitting down with his head in his hands, his shoulders shake, and I’m not sure if it’s from anger or tears. I’m almost afraid to walk up to him, but my worry wins out.

  “I probably have some dead person ashes in my hair now,” I joke. “Thanks a lot.”

  Pyro doesn’t move, so I drop down on my knees in front of him. “What if it’s worse than that, what if it’s a bunch of ground up teeth!”

  He chuckles and moves lightning fast, snatching me into his lap before I can even process what’s happening. “Was this your plan, Shortcake?” he breathes into my hair.

  “What?” I laugh when his nose slides up the side of my neck.

  “To distract me,” he whispers when his mouth reaches my ear.

  Was that what Smokey’s plan was?

  “No, I wanted to check on you. I thought maybe you would’ve been drowning in a sea of liquor all day, but you’re sober, and I smell no alcohol.”

  Pyro licks my earlobe, then sticks his tongue in my ear, and I try to jerk from his hold.

  “Kindly take your tongue out of my ear, sir.”

  I’m enjoying the playfulness he’s dishing out, but I know he’s trying to use me as a distraction, and I refuse to be that for him.

  I deserve more than that.

  “I need to talk to you,” I say, using all my strength to pull away from him.

  Pyro frowns, his green eyes blurry in the light, so I know he’s cried tonight.

  “You know how we talked about your confused feelings in the courtyard a few weeks ago?” I ask him while my fingers play with his leather cut.

  “Yeah.”

  “No more confusion, Pyro,” I whisper. “You love or loved her. I think the emotions you were having, were of loss.”

  He grunts. “A little weird to have you sittin’ on my lap and discussin’ my ex, darlin’.”

  “Let me go, and I can get up.”

  “No. Now what kind of conversation were you havin’ with her when I pulled in?”

  I stiffen. “I wasn’t very nice.”

  He gasps in fake horror. “You? Not nice?”

  I slap his chest. “It isn’t funny.”

  Pyro loosens his grip, leans us back, and swings my legs into his lap. “I know.”

  “Very dramatic, smashing the urn.”

  He leans his head back and closes his eyes and then reopens them. “I know. I desecrated someone’s ashes.”

  I pull his chin down, his green eyes fixed on my expression. “No, the desecration was done by the person who gave you
ashes that weren’t Lana’s.”

  “I’m not handlin’ this well, am I?”

  I drop my hold on his chin with a laugh. “I believe you are. I thought you were going to disappear again when you left earlier today.”

  Pyro lifts me from his lap and sits me beside him.

  “I don’t want to hurt you, Shortcake,” he says with sad eyes. “We’ve agreed to be friends and nothing more, but you’re easy going nature is alluring as hell, darlin.”

  “Okay?”

  “My heart was doin’ crazy shit when I was near her,” he admits, and my heart drops into my stomach. “I’m angry as hell, but what if there’s still somethin’ there?”

  If I wanted a chance with Pyro, it’s not going to happen now.

  “Then you owe it to yourself to see,” I say, the words tasting like battery acid on my tongue. “Do you still want to be my friend?”

  “Jinx,” he murmurs. “Of course, I do.”

  I stand. “I’m going to bed. I wanted to make sure you got home okay.”

  He doesn’t stop me as I leave, and it’s for the best, if he were any kinder, I’d crack wide open.

  ∞∞∞

  Chapter Twelve (A)

  Jinx

  I try to hide in my room, but my stomach has another plan in mind, so I’m in the kitchen eating breakfast when Winter comes into the room. I look away from her when she sits down across from me; until she apologizes, I’m not speaking to her.

  Childish?

  Yes.

  Do I care?

  Nope.

  It’s hard enough being a newcomer in this family, let alone having it thrown in your face that you’re not good enough when you begin messing around with one of them.

  All of them are condescending.

  “I’m sorry, Jinx.”

  I chew the last bite of my bacon sandwich and wash it down with a sip of orange juice. “Do you even understand what upset me?”

  “I made you feel inferior,” she admits. “I’m a bitch.”

  “You all preach about us being this big, happy family, but when I make a move you aren’t happy with, your words throw me out like I’m yesterday’s trash.”

  “You’re not trash, J. I let my past with Lana affect my present, especially with you.”

  I slump in the kitchen chair. “As far as apologies go, it’s a good one.”

  Winter smiles. “You forgive me?”

  I huff. “If you remember I didn’t choose this life for myself, and I’ve earned my place here. I don’t want you judging me or trying to tell me who I can and cannot talk to.”

  “I promise,” she says.

  A knock on the door frame pulls our attention.

  Shadow.

  “Am I interrupting?” he asks.

  I sit up straight. “Not at all.”

  “What’s up?” Winter questions him.

  “Actually, I’m here to ask Jinx for a favor,” Shadow says with a grin.

  “Me.” I point.

  “Yes.” Shadow chuckles walking into the room. “I’m desperate. If I don’t fix my problem, Winter is gonna kick my ass.”

  “Why would I kick your ass?” she laughs.

  “I’m havin’ issues with the instruments distributor. I don’t know how they falsely advertised, but they did. I can’t get a refund on the shipment though.”

  “Instruments? As in sex toys,” I ask.

  Shadow nods. “You’re the savviest businesswoman here. I need you to help me fix my fuck up, so Winter doesn’t have you takin’ over the ordering too.”

  “Winter’s right here,” she grumbles. “What do you need from Jinx?”

  “Prez has given me permission to take Jinx off the compound and to the club for the meeting with the distributors, so I can fire their asses.”

  “You want me to go into a sex club,” I whisper, eyes wide.

  “It’s isn’t open today, J,” Winter informs me.

  “When do we leave?” I ask.

  “Now.”

  “I get to leave the compound,” I say to Winter with a wink. “I believe your husband heard my plea.”

  Winter smirks. “Don’t fuck with the redhead,” she teases me.

  “Ha, ha.”

  “Come on, Seneca’s waitin’ on us.” Shadow grunts.

  Winter gives me a look before I leave the room, a silent one, asking if I’m going to be okay with Seneca going with us. I give her a nod, if I’m going to be stuck here in Breakneck, I’m going to have to learn how to handle newcomers and other brothers from different chapters.

  “Seneca is an enforcer, Jinx. He’s one of the safest brothers to have with you outside of these gates,” Shadow tells me as we walk outside.

  “What is an enforcer?”

  “Easiest way to describe him would be to say he’s like our police, his job is to make sure all members are following chapter laws and guidelines. He’s trained in all forms of combat, J,” he murmurs as we near the bikes. “Can we ride my bike, or would you be more comfortable in a car?” he questions while he nods hello to Seneca.

  “Go big or go home, right?”

  Shadow smirks. “If you’re sure.”

  “I am,” I say as I take the spare helmet from his hands.

  “Where the hell you goin’?” Pyro yells as he jogs over. “Where the hell you takin’ her?”

  I smile “I get to leave the compound for work; your leg feeling better?”

  “Don’t change the subject, Shortcake,” he rumbles. “Where you takin’ her?”

  “The new club,” Shadow answers for me.

  “You’re not bein’ forced to go?” Pyro questions me with his eyes narrowed.

  “No, Shadow asked me nicely.” I shrug. “I get to leave the compound and the clubs closed.”

  “You watch her six like it’s mine,” Pyro warns Shadow and Seneca.

  “You got it VP.” Shadow salutes him with two fingers.

  Satisfied, he swings his gaze back to me. “Enjoy your time outta the slammer, yeah.”

  I follow Shadow’s move and salute him but add a personal wink while I snap the helmet in place.

  Shadow straddles his bike, kick starts it, and motions for me to hop on.

  In no time we’re on the road and the further we get from the compound, the more relaxed I am, it’s a huge weight lifted off my chest. I toss caution out the window and unwrap my arms from Shadow’s body and throw my hands out while I tilt my head back. I can hear Shadow’s chuckle when we stop at a stop sign with ease.

  “Enjoyin’ yourself?” Seneca yells when he stops beside us.

  Seneca may be a stranger and a man, but I’m going to take Shadow at his word. I can make friends with these guys if I allow myself too.

  “Very much.” I give him a genuine smile as Shadow lifts his leg from the ground and we start moving again.

  Ten minutes later, we’re pulling into the new club’s parking lot.

  “That was amazing!” I laugh while handing Shadow the helmet.

  “Wait, was that your first time on a bike,” Seneca questions as we walk through the parking lot.

  “It was.”

  “Damn, lady. You rode well for your first time out,” Seneca praises.

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, Jinx. You did great,” Shadow murmurs as he puts in the entry code for the backdoor. “You’re a natural.”

  Their praises mean everything to me, they uplift my spirits even more than the ride itself. “Thanks, guys.”

  When we get inside the club, the door shuts behind us, and I hear a locking mechanism click.

  Fancy.

  “I keep all the doors closed to the specialty rooms, it’s more professional, you won’t see anythin’ that’ll scar you, Jinx,” Shadow assures me as we follow him down the hall and into a large room with tons of lounge furniture.

  This place sure doesn’t look like a BDSM club.

  “Damn, this place is nice,” Seneca chimes in.

  “It’s been a fuckin’ bitch gettin�
�� this place runnin’ with all the changes. The fucker we jacked it from was an idiot,” Shadow grumps.

  “Shadow, we’re going to talk about you leaving these lights on when no one’s here,” I scold. “No wonder the electric bill is high.”

  He chuckles. “I’ll do better, boss.”

  “What’s your roll in Breakneck, Jinx,” Seneca questions curiously.

  “Money management,” I answer.

  “That’s hot.” Seneca teases, but I honestly believe he’s serious.

  “Brains and beauty.” Shadow nods.

  A blush creeps up my neck with their compliments, not a sexy feature on a redhead, there’s no way to hide it.

  Shadow takes his sunglasses off, hangs them on the neckline of his shirt, unclips a key from a carabiner and hands it to me. “I want you to be comfortable here Jinx; this key will get you into any room in the club. Distributors should be here in about fifteen minutes or so, use the key and go explore until then.”

  I take the key from his outstretched hand. “Point me to the most vanilla room.”

  Shadow’s black soulless eyes don’t laugh at my request, there’s no judgment, he merely nods and points to the right.

  “Thanks.”

  “Don’t leave the club, Jinx,” Seneca orders.

  Why would I leave the club? I’m here to work.

  “I won’t. I promise.” I say when I notice he’s waiting on my response.

  *

  “What in the hell could this be used for,” I whisper to myself while studying a thin metal object. “I probably don’t even want to know.”

  I roll my eyes because my curiosity has me talking to myself.

  I shut the drawer and study the art on the walls of the room.

  Even though I don’t know crap about BDSM, I can tell this place is used only by elite patrons who practice or live the lifestyle fulltime.

  It’s way too fancy.

  I snort. I can’t believe I’m about to negotiate a refund on instruments used for sex.

  When I hear a loud crash and then Spanish being shouted, I run to the wall and hit the light switch; the only light in the room shinning from the hallway.

  The one time I leave the compound during the lockdown and I get stuck in a raid!

  I dig my nails into my palms as my teeth chew at my bottom lip with worry.

  Shadow and Seneca promised Pyro they’d have my six, so I slide down to the floor, and strain to listen.