Alex Hope

by Aj Estelliam

  ‘It’s understandable. I mean this situation would create stress for anyone.’

  I nodded. ‘And it’s not like I can control it-that’s the trouble. I want to help but it’s unpredictable.’

  ‘Well don’t put yourself under pressure. Let’s just see how it goes.’

  ‘Okay…’

  ‘Wrap up warm…I reckon we’ll be out in the cold for a while.’

  ‘True. I did get frozen last time.’

  ‘Yeah…five minutes?’ she said, eyes wide.

  I nodded. ‘I’ll go and get sorted.’

  Five minute later, we met at the door ready.

  ‘You okay?’ Jess asked me, looking down at me closely.

  I nodded, but didn’t trust my voice.

  ‘It’ll be fine…no pressure, remember?’

  ‘Yeah,’ I sighed. ‘No pressure.’

  She lifted my chin with a gentle hand. ‘Hey…be brave.’

  I smiled and she bent and kissed my lips so lightly it felt like the touch of a feather. My heart picked up a rapid beat and suddenly I felt reassured. ‘Okay,’ I agreed with more determination. ‘Let’s go.’

  Jess drove us to the cabin where three other police cars sat waiting for us. As I got out of the car, I felt my nerves set in again. I wasn’t hearing anything apart from the police themselves chattering noisily in their heads. How was I going to find her?

  ‘Hello Alex,’ Captain Withers said, walking towards me.

  ‘Captain,’ I nodded.

  ‘Anything?’ he asked.

  ‘No,’ I said, shaking my head. ‘Nothing yet.’

  ‘Okay…well, we’ll follow you.’

  ‘I don’t hear anything though,’ I told him.

  He frowned. ‘Well, head towards the woods…or wherever…just follow your instincts.’

  I swallowed and looked across the fields towards the heavily wooded forest. I wanted nothing less than to go into those woods. They held such evil and despair. ‘Okay,’ I agreed, even though I was less than willing.

  I started walking, heavy slow footsteps as my boots crunched down into snow as I walked. Jess fell into step beside me and we all crossed the field without talking.

  I didn’t know where I was going and I couldn’t hear any voices. I was doubting myself internally and wondering if I was going to fail. I plodded on; doing as Captain Withers had suggested. I took a few turns once I reached the forest but deep down, felt like I didn’t know where I was going. I just followed the sense of deep foreboding…no thoughts were helping this time.

  ‘Anything?’

  I turned around to see Captain Withers behind me, hands on hips and breathing hard. Clearly this was taking it out of everyone. ‘No…I can’t hear her at all.’

  ‘Where are we going then?’ Jess asked. ‘You haven’t followed the route of last time.’

  ‘Haven’t I?’ I frowned.

  ‘No…completely different in fact. You don’t feel anything?’

  ‘Well, yeah! I feel evil…if I’ve been following anything, it’s the feeling of evil-but no thoughts. I’m sorry, guys, but I just can’t hear her.’

  ‘Don’t worry, Alex. We know you’re doing your best.’

  ‘Should we carry on?’ I asked. ‘I don’t want to,’ I said quietly.

  ‘Why?’ the Captain asked, frowning.

  I shivered, covering my arms and rubbing them. ‘I feel…’ I shook my head.

  ‘What, Alex?’

  ‘I don’t know…it’s hard to explain…I just don’t feel any…hope.’

  Captain Withers and Jess exchanged looks. When they looked back at me, their expressions matched, and were grim.

  ‘You think she’s dead?’ he asked.

  My eyes lowered briefly, and I told myself not to cry. ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘But you suspect?’

  I bit my lip.

  ‘Is she in this wood?’

  ‘I don’t know!’ I exclaimed. ‘What I’m feeling is probably the fact that he brought those other women here! Not that he did anything else…’ I trailed off, as a startling image suddenly crossed over my vision.

  ‘Alex?’ Jess asked frantically, as I dropped to my knees. ‘Alex what is it.’

  ‘I just saw her,’ I said, as tears began to fall and my stomach turned over in horror.

  ‘What? Where?’

  ‘She’s hanging…from a tree,’ I breathed, shakily, and presently collapsed.

  Immediate commotion ensued as they spread out looking. I tried to regain my breathing as Jess stayed at my side, murmuring calming encouragement. She rubbed my shoulders and reassured me while the image fixed itself in my mind. She was hanging…she was dead…the scene was obscene.

  ‘Alex?’

  I rocked myself.

  ‘Alex…it’s going to be alright.’

  I shook my head.

  ‘Alex, you’re going to be alright…’

  I sobbed onto my knees and heard the call.

  ‘Captain!’ a male voice called. ‘We’ve found her!’

  I closed my eyes, rocked myself back and forth while I cried for the poor woman.

  Chapter 19

  How I got back to the police car, I couldn’t remember. I had heavy support from Jess, I knew that much. Since finding the body of the dead woman, activity had swarmed the forest. Police were everywhere, looking for evidence and clues.

  I was ushered aside, questioned and then released into Alex’s care. She got me back to the police car, but I couldn’t speak…I barely functioned.

  As she drove me back, she kept glancing at me. I knew she was concerned about me but I couldn’t snap out of it. The scenes of death and suffering were too much for me to bear and I found myself in something of a daze.

  Jess pulled up outside the house and then ushered me inside, by taking my arm. Even inside, I couldn’t seem to break the haze I was in. I felt drowsy and troubled.

  ‘Come on,’ she encouraged.

  I just looked up at her in question.

  ‘Let’s get you in a bath and warmed up.’

  I followed obediently, doing as she suggested. I was very cold and very much need of comfort. Jess ran a bath, placed out towels and then told me she’d be outside. With shaking hands, I undressed myself slowly and climbed in the piping hot water. As I sank back into the water, I cried silently for the life that had been lost in evil’s hands.

  I lay in the bath for some time before I began to feel normal again. I knew Jess was sat outside the door the whole time, I could hear her thinking. As I lay there, I tried to think about all I knew about the man who committed these crimes. The trouble was, I didn’t know enough. As I felt myself come too though, I resolved to be more helpful. I wanted to catch this man and stop the women of the town being hurt. Things had gone too far already.

  ‘I’m fine,’ I called.

  A moment of silence and then, ‘I didn’t actually say anything.’

  ‘Oh, sorry…’

  ‘But are you okay?’

  ‘Yeah…I’m okay now. I think it was just a bit of a shock.’

  ‘Of course it was,’ she replied.

  I climbed out of the bath and wrapped myself in a towel. I then headed out to where Jess sat on the landing and sat down beside her.

  ‘You’re very quiet,’ she commented.

  I glanced at her. ‘Yeah.’

  ‘It’s unnerving.’

  ‘Are you trying to say I usually talk a lot?’

  ‘Not a lot…you’re just good company. This evening you’ve been subdued.’

  I hugged my knees close to me. ‘What do you think it’s like to die?’ I asked softly.

  ‘Alex! You don’t need to be thinking about that.’

  ‘I keep thinking about that poor woman…how she must have suffered.’

  ‘Perhaps,’ Jess answered. There was no denying that she had to have been in pain. ‘But she’s at peace now. He can’t hurt her anymore.’

  ‘No…’ I murmured.

  ‘What?’


  ‘I just…’

  ‘What?’

  ‘I bet he will want me dead too,’ I said quietly.

  Jess gasped. ‘Don’t say such things!’ she exclaimed.

  ‘Well, it’s true! I’ve messed up everything for him! Surely he won’t rest until he’s done the same awful things to me.’

  ‘No,’ she said, shaking her head, ‘because we’re going to take him down first.’

  ‘We are?’

  She nodded. ‘Most definitely.’

  She laid a hand on top of mine and met my eyes with a determined glint. ‘Stay strong.’

  I nodded. ‘I’m trying.’

  ‘Okay…well, stay there a minute. I need a quick shower and then we’re going to go and chill out. Goodness knows we’ve earned it!’

  I nodded.

  I sat there and waited while she showered, staring at my hands and wondering about death and the fear all the women must have gone through when he touched them and hurt them. I felt sick over it all. I couldn’t believe how quickly my life had changed and now I was involved in one of the worst murder cases known to Scotland.

  When Jess emerged, she held out her hand to me and pulled me up. I then followed her up the stairs to the bedroom.

  There, I turned my back and reached for my pyjamas. After pulling them on, I climbed onto the far side of the bed and sat back against the pillows. I watched Jess pull on her clothes and then she joined me.

  ‘Right…spill…’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Well, I may not be able to hear thoughts in the way you can, but I can certainly hear when your mind is working overtime. Come on…talk to me.’

  I shook my head. ‘It’s just this case.’

  ‘I know…so voice your fears…’

  ‘I have!’

  ‘You want to know if they suffered?’

  I frowned.

  ‘And how they felt when they died?’

  I looked up at her and felt my stomach clench. ‘I don’t understand it.’

  ‘Of course you don’t…we’re not dealing with a normal human being here, Alex. He’s a psychopath…or a sociopath…who knows? We need to find him and figure out his motives.’

  ‘But what motive can he possibly have to do all this?’

  ‘You’d be surprised,’ she said knowingly. ‘I’ve seen some awful crimes over the years, Alex, and the ridiculous things which have sparked them are shocking!’

  ‘I can imagine,’ I murmured, staring as Jess shifted and her t-shirt rode up.

  Without thinking, I reached out and touched the deep, white scar which trailed along her stomach.

  ‘Don’t touch it!’ she said, pushing my hand away as if it burned her skin.

  ‘Sorry,’ I murmured.

  She pulled her t-shirt down. ‘I don’t like people seeing my scars…’

  ‘No…you’re ashamed,’ I said, feeling like weeping.

  ‘They’re ugly, and hideous. No-one should have to see them.’

  ‘You’re beautiful-inside and out. A few scars doesn’t change that,’ I told her warmly.

  ‘Oh yeah? A few scars?’ she muttered angrily.

  Without warning, she lifted her t-shirt up and away and showed me the extent of her scarring. It was immense. All across her torso, including into her breasts. Then she turned and I saw her back. It was a criss cross of lines, bisecting into each other and marring her beautiful skin. I couldn’t help but be shocked as just what she had been through.

  ‘There…now you’ve seen it,’ she said, pulling her top back on. ‘I bet you don’t feel quite the same anymore, right? Pretty grim, isn’t it? I told you! So, just leave it, okay? I know they’re off putting. I’ve been told it before. We’ll just be friends. You can back off without me being upset. I understand it’s a lot to take on…’

  I moved towards her and eased her back against the pillows.

  ‘What are you doing?’ she asked, looking concerned.

  ‘Just…’ I didn’t really have words to say…I just wanted to show her how much I cared and that the scars didn’t put me off being with her.

  ‘Alex?’

  I leaned forwards and pushed her t-shirt up, kissing her lower stomach where the scar started. As I did, I got a flash of the knife which inflicted this wound. I felt it dig in as he raped her. Tears threatened.

  I kissed a trail of butterfly kisses up her stomach, all over her scars. I was going on a journey, a journey to understand where each scar had come from and why it had been inflicted. As I did, I got the same sense of evil that I had felt in the woods earlier that day. Another man setting out to hurt an innocent woman. It made me so mad.

  When I had covered her stomach with as many kisses as possible, I made my way up her neck. When I reached her mouth, I felt ready. I let my body relax down over her and pressed my lips to hers. They opened eagerly under mine.

  I kissed Alex wantonly, wanting her now more than ever. She shifted beneath me rhythmically; clearly becoming more and more turned on. My tongue found hers and mated with passion. I moaned in pleasure as she rolled me over, effectively reversing our positions.

  Within moments she had my top off and my naked breasts pressed against her clothing. I writhed and kissed her more eagerly, desperate for more and loving her touch.

  She kissed her way down my neck and then moved towards my puckered nipples. They were tight and ready for her touch as she lowered her mouth. I arched as she drew one, erect nipple into her mouth. She suckled on it eagerly, making me gasp with delight. When she released it, it was only to lick and lap at it with her tongue. Her touch was driving me crazy. She then moved to my other breast where she lavished the same attention on my other nipple. I moved on the bed, feeling more aroused than I had ever felt in my life.

  Finally, she released my nipple and began a trail down my stomach. I quivered with anticipation as she made her way south. I knew her intentions and my body was ready and eager for her intimate touch.

  When she reached the juncture between my thighs, she parted my legs before her and bent her head. Her tongue touched me and sent darts of electricity pulsing through me. I cried out in pleasure. Her tongue began lapping and exploring every inch of me, setting off feelings of bliss throughout my entire body.

  As she licked, I circled my hips. I couldn’t help moving rhythmically as she tormented me into the most sensual of pleasure. She spread me wider and added her fingers to her touch, making me cry out again. She increased the pressure and I felt my heat growing. Rising higher and higher, my climax approached and when it came, I arched off the bed and cried out her name, loving the feel of her tongue on me intimately. Wave after wave of intense, wonderful pleasure shot through me and it was a long while before I finally relaxed back against the bed. When I did, she rose to lie on top of me and kiss me open-mouthed. I kissed her back and then rolled her over. Without further ado, I bent to her sex and buried my tongue in her clitoris. It was well into the night when we finally slept.

  The dawn was breaking when I finally stirred. I felt warm and satisfied and when I opened my eyes, I realised why. I was lying in Jess’ arms and had never felt happier and content. She looked relaxed in sleep and no worries or thoughts plagued her. I watched her for long moments, realising that I had never felt like this with any other woman. What I had with Alex was special, there was no denying it. I wouldn’t be walking away from her at the end of this case. There was no way I was going to go forward in life now without her.

  ‘Hey,’ she said, waking.

  I smiled at her. She looked tired and drowsy. ‘Go back to sleep.’

  ‘Only if you do too,’ she said, closing her eyes again.

  ‘Okay, I’ll try,’ I replied softly and tried going back to sleep. The trouble was, I found her too distracting. I couldn’t help opening my eyes to simply stare at her some more.

  ‘Go to sleep,’ she ordered a moment later, surprising me. I had thought she had gone back to sleep.

  ‘Sorry…alright,’ I said, closing my eye
s.

  As I did so, she reached her hand between my thighs and gently parted me. One finger slipped into my folds and gently began rubbing me rhythmically. I moaned and opened my legs wider to invite her touch. She took this as encouragement and began rubbing me more rapidly.

  My orgasm came quickly and I arched, crying out as pleasure flooded through me. I gasped and breathed harshly as the climax took over. Moments later, she released me and lay back, eyes closed. I felt my whole body relax and I closed my eyes. Seconds later, I fell asleep.

  When I next woke, I found myself alone. I rolled over, wondering where she Jess was. After throwing on a t-shirt, I headed down the stairs to find her.

  Jess was in the kitchen making a hot drink and breakfast.

  ‘Hey,’ I said, heading over to the kitchen. I couldn’t stop looking at her. She wore a t-shirt and little cotton shorts. She looked adorably cosy in her relaxed clothing.

  ‘Hey! I was going to surprise you!’ she said, grinning widely.

  ‘Ah,’ I said, moving into her arms. ‘I woke up and wanted to find you!’

  ‘I’m just here,’ she said, lowering her lips to mine.

  I lifted my face and kissed her eagerly, my mouth parting and my tongue meeting hers passionately. As she kissed me, I reached into her shorts and rubbed her clitoris. It was slick and engorged as I rapidly brought her to orgasm; standing against the kitchen counter. When she came she cried out, and held onto the sides for support.

  ‘Oh my God,’ she laughed, when the waves of pleasure had passed.

  I chuckled, low and throaty, loving our newfound relationship. ‘Good morning to you,’ I smiled.

  ‘Yeah…your turn,’ she said, and without warning, lifted me bodily by the waist and plonked me up on the kitchen counter. She then spread my legs and bent to my sex.

  Her tongue lathered attention on my clitoris and all over my most sensitive of areas. I opened myself wider and arched my back, nipples skywards as she licked me into oblivion. It only took me a few minutes to reach climax. Her touch was too intense to last longer. I gasped as the bliss overtook me and I came with incredible force. I slumped back against the kitchen cupboards feeling spent.

  ‘That’s better,’ she smiled. ‘Tit for tat.’