Football Baby: A Secret Baby Romance

by Roxeanne Rolling

  Something happened.

  Coach is standing in front of me in my memory, looking like a weird unfocused image from an old movie, lecturing me about something… The other team… Who were they again? Seattle… No, I play for Seattle. Well, someone was trying to hurt me…

  I guess they did.

  Now it comes back.

  The tackle.

  I sank to the field, unable to move. There was pain, pain deep in my bones, pain inside, and that’s the last thing I remember.

  “Dylan, you’re in the hospital in Seattle. You just came out of surgery.”

  They’re still talking, but I can’t concentrate on what they’re saying. Something about what they did to me during the surgery. I really couldn’t care less.

  Another memory comes floating… Someone telling me Sam looks like me, a lot like me, like a little miniature version of me.

  I thought he was my son, but Lauren said he wasn’t. Then she got mad at me…

  Lauren!

  Where is she?

  I open my mouth, which feels so dry I don’t know if I’ll be able to talk.

  “Lauren,” I say, unable to inflect my voice to make it sound like a question.

  “He said something!”

  “We’ve got to knock him out again. He’s got to rest.”

  Someone’s doing something over to my side, but I’m not sure what.

  The last thing I’m thinking about before I pass out is Lauren… Lauren and her beauty shining towards me…

  I’m waking up.

  I vaguely remember being awake earlier, after my accident.

  An accident…no, I got hit on the field. Two Milwaukie players came at me hard, and I took the hit hard. I wasn’t expecting it.

  Lauren? Where’s Lauren.

  I’m a little more aware now. I’m trying to open my eyes, but they feel all fucked up.

  When I open them, no one is in the room.

  But wait. There’s someone huddled in the chair in the corner.

  She wakes up, her hair falling around her.

  “You’re awake!” she says, rushing over to me.

  It’s Lauren!

  “Lauren,” I say.

  “Dylan! Oh my God! I can’t believe you’re awake. They wouldn’t let me see you forever and ever. We’ve been waiting and they wouldn’t tell us how you’d be.” She’s rambling now, looking extremely tired and stressed out.

  “I’m OK,” I say, trying to reach out to touch her, but I can’t move my arm for some reason.

  “You’re beat up pretty bad,” she says, leaning in and kissing me gently on my forehead. It hurts, even though her lips are soft and she moves slowly and deliberately. “You were in surgery for hours and hours.”

  “Where’s Sam?” I say.

  To my surprise, Lauren starts tearing up.

  “Is he OK?” I say, growing a little panicked. I don’t want to see anything bad happen to that kid. More than almost anything.

  “He’s fine,” says Lauren. “He’s with your parents. They took him out to eat.”

  “My parents are here?”

  “Yeah, I mean you took the hit on national TV. It looked really bad on TV apparently, just as bad as it did in person. They came as soon as they saw it on TV. I met them, they’re really sweet and nice.”

  “I’m glad you got to meet them,” I say.

  “Dylan, I have to tell you something…”

  “Lauren, let me say it first…”

  “But you don’t know what I’m going to say.”

  “I think I have an idea. Lauren, I’ve wanted to tell you this ever since we were in college… But we were so young, and I wasn’t sure if I really felt it or not… But now I know, more than anything. I’m mot sure of this than anything in the world. It’s OK if you don’t want to move in with me. I don’t understand it… but, Lauren, I have to tell you that I love you.”

  I’m not sure what’s going to happen now. But it feels like a huge weight that’s been dragging me down has been lifted. It doesn’t feel particularly good, though, just like a mechanical type of relief. Even if she rejects me, and doesn’t feel the same way, at least I finally told her… And now I’m totally sure I wanted to say it, totally sure I mean it, mean it with all my heart.

  Lauren pauses. She puts her hand on my arm, and tries to hold my hand, but some medical devices are in the way. I look down for the first time at my arm. I’m all plugged up with IVs that I can’t make heads or tails of.

  “I love you, too, Dylan,” says Lauren.

  She’s crying and holding me tight.

  Lauren leans in and kisses me on the mouth, gently.

  “I have to go,” says Lauren, suddenly.

  “What? Where are you going?”

  “I just… I can’t…”

  “Lauren, what’s going on?”

  But she’s already rushing across the room, opening the door.

  I try to get up, but the pain rushes through me and I almost scream. I grab the IVs in my arm and try to rip them out, but I don’t even have the strength to do that.

  What the fuck just happened? She tells me she loves me and then she leaves?

  I don’t even feel anything. I don’t know how to react. I was overjoyed a second ago, and that was all ripped to shreds when Lauren ran out…

  My system just doesn’t know what to make of it… I must be in some kind of numbing state of shock.

  I lie here totally exhausted, emotionally and physically.

  Suddenly the door swings open.

  Is it a nurse?

  No, it’s Lauren.

  “Lauren!”

  “Dylan,” says Lauren. “I can’t keep this from you any longer. I just cant…”

  “What is it?”

  “Sam is your son.”

  “My son?”

  “Yes. I was on birth control in college, but I was so stressed from exams…and that was the time that we met, that I just forgot to take the pills, and I got pregnant from you. You were the only person I was with. There wasn’t anybody else. And I don’t know what happened.”

  Lauren’s talking a mile a minute, obviously completely nervous. She’s just trying to spit out all the information she can.

  “I don’t know… I made a mistake. I shouldn’t have just run off like that. I took the first bus I could find, and that’s how I ended up in Baltimore. I mean I knew I wanted to be with you, but I just couldn’t… I just couldn’t see how it would work. I was so worried about all the things that could go wrong if I moved to Seattle with you and had Sam there. I mean… It’s just that I was so caught up in being independent, and what I realize now is that it’s because of the way my parents never helped me with anything at all… I had to do everything myself, completely on my own, so it was completely inconceivable to me that you would have helped me raise our baby together.”

  “But of course I would have helped,” I say.

  “I can see that now… But, well, I guess I really screwed up. I constantly think about it, and I’m always wondering why I did it… I guess I was young and stressed and confused. There’s really no excuse for it, though. And, as to why I didn’t contact you later and tell you…well, I wanted to… I was just waiting for the right time. But then I met you, and things were going well, and I thought that if I told you, you’d be furious with me and it would ruin the relationship. It was so hard to watch you and Sam have such a good time together, neither or you knowing that you’re related…”

  “Sam doesn’t know?”

  She shakes her head. “I’ve never told him, but I’ve wanted to. I know how much he admires you and wants to be like you. Anyway, once you said you loved me… And I love you, too, obviously… Well let me first say that was the reason I was scared of moving here to Seattle with you, even though I desperately wanted and still want to…I think we could be so happy together as a family. But of course…I mean given how big of a mistake I’ve made, I can under
stand if you never want to see me again… If our relationship can’t continue, I just hope you’ll continue to see Sam. I think it would mean so much to him, and it could be good for you both. But like I said, I can totally understand if you hate me for this… I just couldn’t hold it back any longer.”

  Lauren stops talking. She’s standing there quivering. I mean absolutely shaking, with tears streaming down her face.

  I find that I’m crying too. Only they’re tears of joy.

  I can’t believe Sam is my son! That kid is fucking awesome. He’s exactly what I’d want if I had a son… and now not only do I have a son, but I have Sam!

  “Wow,” I say.

  “It’s OK if you hate me,” says Lauren, crying even harder.

  “Come here, baby,” I say.

  She’s still frozen.

  “Come here,” I say, taking her arm and pulling me closer to me.

  I didn’t even realize it when I did it, but I can move my arm!

  “I think I just had a medical breakthrough,” I say. “I’m moving my arm!”

  As soon as I realize I’m doing it, the pain returns though.

  “I’m just so happy,” I say. “I love you and Sam both, and I want us to be a family together.”

  “You’re not angry at me?”

  “Well, I would have liked things to turn out differently if we had a time machine… But I guess that’s always the way things are. I mean nothing ever turns out perfectly. And it all makes sense now… The way you were acting. It was confusing, but now I understand.”

  “You still want us to come live with you?”

  “Now even more than before,” I say. “It’s exciting. If I ever get out of this bed, I can make scrambled eggs for you two every day of the week!”

  Lauren laughs. She’s still crying, but I’m pretty sure now they’re tears of joy.

  “I might get tired of that,” says Lauren, continuing to laugh.

  She doesn’t stop laughing, and soon I’m laughing too.

  “Come here,” I say.

  She does her best to hug me, putting her head on my chest. Unfortunately the wires and tubes are all still in the way.

  “I’m pretty beat up,” I say. “Do you know when I’ll get out of here?”

  “I’ve been talking to the doctors constantly. I think they’re pretty sick of me at this point. But they say in a couple weeks you’ll be out of bed and walking around.”

  “And football?” I ask, even though I’m afraid of the answer.

  “You had some major surgery. I don’t want to go into it now since it makes me squeamish just thinking about it… But there’s nothing that’s going to prevent you from playing next season.”

  “I’m not sure I want to go back to it,” I say.

  “Whatever makes you happy, Dylan. It doesn’t matter to me in the least bit whether you’re a pro football star or whether you work at the gas station.”

  “That’s one of the things I love about you,” I say.

  Lauren leans in and kisses me softly. It’s one of if not the most romantic kiss of my life.

  “There’s just something special about you,” I say.

  “I feel exactly the same way,” says Lauren.

  25

  Lauren

  I didn’t realize how tense I’ve felt for the last six years with this secret bottled up inside me. Ever since I told Dylan, not to mention Sam, I’ve felt so much more relaxed.

  Sam was simply overjoyed to find out that Dylan is actually his father. The whole thing went over far more smoothly than I ever could have imagined. I’m still surprised to this day.

  Sam ended up staying with Dylan and his parents in Seattle for a week while I went back to Baltimore to start packing up our things. I thought Sam might want to say goodbye to his friends, but he’s more excited about making new friends at his new Seattle school…in truth, he didn’t have many friends to say goodbye too. I think that with Dylan as his Dad, Sam will find it much easier now to connect with his peers.

  I met Dylan’s parents at the hospital and they’re absolutely adorable. They’re so sweet, and they were so happy to meet me. They took the news that Dylan’s a dad great—they were just overjoyed to have grandkids finally. They said they never thought Dylan would settle down with anybody because he was still so hung up on me from college.

  So I’m here in Baltimore packing up our things. It also gives me a chance to quit my two jobs in person, something that gives me an unusual amount of satisfaction. Dylan and I have been talking about me going back to school for something that would land me a more stable, more interesting, job in the future. He’s even offered to pay for everything. It’s something I still feel a little uncomfortable with, but he really wants me to go to school.

  I’m going through the boxes here and the memories of the last six years are coming back to me.

  When I got here, I was pregnant and I didn’t have anything at all. I just had a duffel bag of stuff that was barely enough.

  It was a horribly tough time, and I don’t like being reminded of it, especially now that everything has changed so much, now that I’m with Dylan.

  So I end up throwing most of our stuff away.

  Of course, I keep Sam’s toys, books, and games, and pack them neatly in boxes to be shipped out to Seattle.

  But of my own stuff, well, I just don’t really need it. I can get new stuff, with new memories attach to it.

  As for the household things like kitchen stuff, my things were so worn out they’re barely worth keeping. And plus Dylan has a whole set of household things and utensils and good steak knives and all the right things. He’s been talking about getting a better place now, or at least having me help him fix up his bachelor pad and convert it into something more for the whole family.

  Dylan’s going to be in the hospital another couple weeks, but I think he’s making good progress. It sure seemed serious at first, especially when he was in surgery. I still haven’t told Dylan, but the doctors were telling me that they weren’t even sure if he could live. He ruptured a bunch of organs somehow.

  The guys who tackled him were given some kind of penalty. I don’t know the details of it, but Sam’s always talking about it. Basically it was an illegal hit, and the tactics of targeting a quarterback in the pro leagues are now under heavy investigation, after what happened to Dylan.

  I just feel so happy all the time now. I find myself humming walking around the old apartment. In just a couple days I’ll be back in Seattle. After all, Baltimore never really felt like home. It was just an accident that I ended up here at all.

  I’m not going to miss it.

  26

  Dylan

  When I got out of the hospital, when I could walk again, the first thing I did was get down on one knee and ask Lauren to marry me. Sam was there of course, and my parents were staying nearby at a hotel.

  Of course she said “yes,” but I was still nervous all the same.

  My parents came over and took all three of us out to dinner, a big happy family that I never thought I could have for myself.

  There was this whole thing about me struggling to walk. It was tough at first, but I’m a lot better now, and I’m seeing specialists almost every other day now and working with a good trainer who specializes in sports injury rehabilitation.

  The up side of the whole incident is that…well, everything. Getting tackled like that was the best thing that every happened to me. I got a wife, a son, not to mention some killer erotic massages from Lauren.

  Today’s the day of the wedding, and we’ve decided to do the slightly unusual move of making Sam my best man. That way he’s really part of the whole ceremony.

  It’s a small affair, with just a few guys from The Rabbits, my parents, Lauren’s parents (who I’ve never met before), and a couple friends. Some of Lauren’s college friends actually came out, including her roommate who was always at the library. I can’t remember her name off
the top of my head—I’ll have to ask Lauren. She was always saying she didn’t have any friends at college, but it turns out she’s got more than she thought.

  “You ready, Sam?” I say, peering down at Sam who’s looking quite dapper in a child’s suit that we picked out together.

  “Yup,” he says, smiling up at me. “I’m ready, Dad. One second, I think I just have to adjust your tie a little.”

  “You’re really taking your duties as best man very seriously,” I say, as I bend down so that Sam can adjust my tie.”

  “I do what I can,” says Sam.

  We’re now up at the front in the beautiful garden, and Lauren’s walking down the aisle with her father, a handsome greying man in his early sixties.

  “Wow,” I whisper. “Quite the catch, eh, Sam?” I just want him to really feel like a best man. It’s a joke we have going on between us.

  I’m so excited that my memory is a little jumbled, but pretty soon Lauren is standing in front of me looking more radiant than I’ve ever seen her, beaming at me.

  We both say our “I do’s,” and now it’s time to “you may kiss the bride.”

  Lauren and I give them a kiss for the ages, a real long one.

  “I think you need a massage later,” whispers Lauren to me as we pull apart from our kiss.

  THE END (Turn the page to read Deep End.)

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  Deep End

  A Bad Boy Sports Romance

  Roxeanne Rolling

  1

  Anchor

  “Hey Anchor, check her out!” cries Dave, my best swimming bro, pointing at some chick. But that wasn’t anything new. Dave is always pointing out chicks. I don’t have to look as hard for them myself. I like to let them come to me. And, in the end, I’m the one who gets the chicks Dave points out. They can’t resist me. What can I say?

  They call me Anchor for two reasons. One: I’m the anchor on our college relay team. I’m also the captain of the team, and have been the captain since I was a sophomore, far earlier than anyone else ever has been. No matter how many beers I’ve had the night before, I always pull the team to victory, no matter how far behind we are. Two: when I’m in my swim briefs, my package is so big it weighs me down like an anchor. But I always win even so.