Back Alley Cop

by Temple Madison

  The minute that Joe’s gaze fell on Vinnie, his smile fell, and the two men stared at each other. “A friend of yours…did you say?”

  “Well…more like a colleague, really. Vinnie, this is Joe King. He’s new around here.”

  “Joe King, huh?” Vinnie said, almost as if he were savoring the name on his tongue as he stared into his eyes. “Good to know you…Joe King.” With an awkward thrust of his hand, he extended it in friendship.

  “Yeah, same here.” Looking back over at Carl, his smile became genuine. “Well, take care, Carl. See you around.”

  Carl moved to follow him out. “I hope everyone’s making you feel welcome. If you need someone to show you around…”

  While Joe and Carl were talking Vinnie looked Joe over. He tried to look away, but somehow he couldn’t keep his eyes off him. His probing gaze moved along his body looking for anything out of place, in bad taste, or overly done, but he didn’t find it. Instead, he was very impressed with what he saw. He didn’t overdress for the office, in fact, his look was very basic. Dark blue jeans, white shirt with a blue sweater over it, and a loose collar. Wrapped around his neck was a bandanna designed with different hues of blue that matched his outfit. He wondered about the bandanna because it was a rich look, and this guy, at entry level, couldn’t be making that much money. And yet his look was first-class, natural and easy. He didn’t look uncomfortable, he looked as if he could have been born in those clothes. He dressed well, but without all the bells and whistles that a new employee might wear if he was trying to impress the bosses. His look was clean, starched, and he had a fresh smell about him that suggested good grooming. Vinnie had detected a kind of woodsy smell with an underlying mix of floral that softened the heavy manly scent and made it exotic and light. Everything about him was low-key, with the tiniest suggestion of sex. If he was gay, he didn’t need to shout it out, but whispered it oh so faintly, getting the attention of only those who needed to know—like Vinnie.

  Finally, when both Joe and Carl were through talking, Carl came back to the table.

  “What’s with you?” Vinnie asked. “You act like this guy’s something special. I’m surprised you didn’t get down on all fours and lick his shoes. He’d like that since he’s a clean nut, you know.”

  “Give it a rest, Vinnie. Lunch is over. I’ve gotta get back to work.”

  “Is that what Joe said? Do you skip to his beat now? What do you care what he thinks? He’s a new guy, for God’s sake, but you treat him like he’s been dipped in sugar water. What is it with you?”

  “Hey, I like the guy, that’s all.”

  “What’s he got that’s so…”

  “Look, Vinnie. If you don’t like him, fine. Me? I do, so cut the crap.”

  “But you’re not gay.”

  “What the hell does that have to do with anything? So he’s gay. I couldn’t care less. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta get back to work.”

  Vinnie smiled at Carl’s reply. So the new guy was gay. With that in mind, he glanced toward Joe’s departing figure and knew what his next move would be.

  * * * *

  For the next couple of weeks Vinnie and Eddie danced around each other day after day, both watching each other, their gazes cutting, sliding as they spoke in a language all their own. When they stood close, whispers would get loud, their voices exploding with phrases like, “You creep, can’t you take a hint? I’m not interested!”

  And then the day came when Vinnie followed Joe into the coffee room. Taking his time, he sauntered in behind him and leaned against the doorframe watching him. After a few seconds his gaze moved upward, catching a glimpse of the surveillance camera.

  “That damned eye up there sees everything. They’re so damned afraid somebody’s gonna take some coffee that they don’t pay for. For two cents I’d…”

  “So how much is it? The coffee, I mean.”

  “Twenty-five cents.”

  At that moment the men’s eyes met, and the silent knowing that passed between them was broken when Joe finally replied. “I guess I can manage that.”

  He turned then, walked over to the bar, put some change in the bowl, grabbed a cup and began pouring himself some coffee.

  “The whole damned building is bugged like this one, so you might want to be careful of what you say, or do,” Vinnie warned Joe.

  “Would you cool it, for God’s sake? The less said, the better.”

  “Hell, they won’t fire me. They couldn’t get another creep to work for the peanuts I work for.” Vinnie looked up at the camera, and yelled, “Peanuts! That’s what I work for! Fuckin’ peanuts!”

  “My God, would you get hold of yourself?”

  “Creeps,” Vinnie mumbled, and then moved his gaze away from the camera. “So, you’ve been here for a while now, how’s it going so far? Getting to know everyone?”

  “Yeah,” Joe responded, an uninterested sound to his voice.

  “So, what’s wrong?” Vinnie questioned. “Your job not challenging enough for you?”

  Ignoring his question, Joe asked, “Do you know Adam Dunbar?”

  “Yeah, I know him.”

  “Do you know when he’s due back at work?”

  “You know Adam?” Vinnie answered Joe’s question with one of his own.

  “Not really, only slightly.”

  “Then why are you so interested in when he gets back?”

  Joe’s hard gaze was directed at Vinnie. “Is that any of your fuckin’ business?”

  “Hey, just making polite conversation. Last I heard he was in Sweden.”

  “What’s he doing over there?”

  “What do you think?”

  Joe gave a slight shrug. “There could be lots of reasons.”

  “Well, let’s just say when Adam comes back from Sweden, he won’t be Adam anymore.”

  Joe looked at Vinnie curiously. “What do you mean by that?”

  “Ever heard of a sex change operation? The fact is, Adam’s always been uncomfortable as a man, so he decided to change his gender.”

  Joe glanced toward the camera. “Is that the truth, or are you putting on a show for the camera?”

  Vinnie laughed. “At any other time you’d be right, but not in this case. I’m telling the truth.”

  “I don’t believe it. Besides, where would he get that kind of money working at KingStar?”

  “You really don’t know Adam, do you? If you knew him you’d know that he’s rolling in it. Yeah, he’s one of them rich guys who can afford it. Keep your eyes open, and when Adam gets back don’t be surprised if he’s changed his name to Ada.” He looked up at the camera, and winked.

  *

  Eddie thought back to the day they were in the Interrogation Room when he was questioning Adam…

  “…I’m going to Sweden for a medical procedure…a medical procedure…”

  “Do you feel like a woman trapped in a man’s body?”

  “What the hell’s so great about Adam?” Vinnie interrupted Eddie’s thoughts. “Why don’t you give somebody else a chance?”

  “Huh? What do you mean?”

  “Well, it sounds to me like you’re interested in Adam, but since Adam won’t be Adam anymore, maybe someone else could…”

  “Who? You?” Eddie asked, almost laughing. “Again…not interested.”

  “I wouldn’t make a snap decision if I were you. Maybe you should sample the merchandise before you make up your mind.”

  “Vinnie, let’s not do this. We have to work together…”

  “Hell, man, it’ll be a while before Adam gets back. The nights can get awful lonely.”

  Eddie looked around, noticing that he was trapped in a corner. “Step back, Vinnie. How many times are we going to have this conversation?”

  “What’s the matter, afraid you’ll like it?”

  “Hey, man, how many times I gotta say it? You don’t do it for me. Got it?”

  “Why not
? I’m not a bad…”

  *

  Before Vinnie got his words out, he felt something hot and wet coming down on his head, and he jumped back. “What the hell?”

  “Oh, sorry, I spilled my coffee.” Eddie said, looking down at Vinnie’s shirt. “Mmmm, nasty stain.”

  “Why, you bastard!” Vinnie shouted. “You did that on purpose.”

  “Let that be a lesson to you, creep. Keep your hands to yourself. For your information I’m not interested in going to bed with a pervert like you.”

  “A what?”

  “Forget it. It doesn’t matter.”

  “You fuckin’ gay retard, you called me a pervert!” Vinnie shouted. “Me? A pervert? I’m not the pervert around here, Mr. Joe King. Adam with his stupid sex change operation is the pervert. If you think you can get him in the sack, think again. He’s a woman now, and I hear guys like you don’t like women.” As he turned to leave, he stopped at the door, turned back, and pointed at Joe. “You fooled with the wrong guy this time. You ain’t heard the last of this yet.”

  * * * *

  A few days later Joe noticed everyone talking about someone who had been away, but was back now. Did he dare hope it was Adam? Or was it, oh, God, Ada? Trying to keep his mind on his job, he stepped up to the copy machine and began using it when he felt a presence behind him.

  “Heard the latest gossip?” Vinnie asked, speaking low.

  “Gossip’s not my thing.”

  “This gossip is.”

  “Yeah?” Joe turned, his arms folded over his chest as he looked curiously at Vinnie. “So what is it? What are you bursting to tell me?”

  “Who’s your favorite person in the whole world?”

  “You mean besides you?”

  Vinnie’s smile fell. “Smartass. You know who I’m talking about. It’s Adam. He’s back.”

  “So he’s back. So what?”

  “Well, the word is, he’s not Adam anymore. He’s Ada.”

  “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

  “Okay, if that’s what it takes, come with me, and I’ll show you.”

  Curious, he abandoned his copies to the machine, and turned to go with Vinnie.

  “When we get there,” Vinnie instructed, “I’ll just introduce you as the new guy in the office so he…she won’t think we planned this. You understand?”

  “Whatever,” Joe said, following along.

  With Vinnie in the lead, they walked up to the secretarial desk. “Hi, Venita. Is…is…she in?”

  “This can’t be the place,” Joe hissed under his breath. “This is the CEO’s office.”

  “Shhh. You’re talking too loud,” Vinnie quickly glanced around. “Keep it down.”

  “Yes, she’s here.” Venita looked at Joe with a sweet smile. “She has an open door policy, so you can go right on in.”

  He returned her smile. “Thanks.”

  “Sure.”

  They both turned, and as they approached the door, Vinnie peeked in and knocked lightly. “Good morning, Ms. Dunbar. May I bring someone in to meet you?”

  “Ms. Dunbar?” Joe whispered to Vinnie. “You’re really playing this one to the hilt, aren’t you?”

  “You certainly may. Come right on in while I close these blinds. The morning sun can be brutal. So bright.”

  When he walked in, Joe stared intently at her feminine form. And then when the woman turned around, his eyes widened in surprise. He couldn’t believe what he saw. She was the very image of Adam. But this woman didn’t look like she had just come off an operating table, she seemed to be very comfortable with who she was, and when she looked into his eyes there was no indication of any recognition there.

  Finally, Ada put out her hand. “How do you do? I’m Ada Dunbar.”

  “I’m…my name is Joe King.”

  “Well, Mr. King, I’m so very happy to meet you. I hope everyone’s treating you all right.”

  When Joe took her hand, he noticed how soft and feminine it was, and remembered touching it when he was with him in the Interrogation Room. Sure, his hands were soft, but they were a man’s hands. Large like men’s hands were. These hands—Ada’s hands—were small and definitely feminine.

  He immediately knew that something wasn’t right.

  Just then a bright color caught his eye, and he turned to look at it. He immediately noticed all the red accents in the office that triggered a memory of a red net shirt, and red socks.

  “I see you’ve noticed my unusual décor. I have to confess I absolutely love red. It’s my favorite color.”

  Now, as he looked back at her, his gaze tried to penetrate the hair, makeup and women’s clothes to see the man he’d seen in the Interrogation Room at the precinct, but with no success. Finally, he questioned, “Adam? Is that you?”

  Just then a burst of laughter sounded around the room, causing Joe to turn around and look. What he saw was a crowd of people peeking around the door, some who had pushed their way in to see the stupid jerk who thought Ada was Adam.

  “Adam?” Ada replied with a strange look on her face. “I’m afraid I don’t understand.”

  At that very moment a side door opened, and Adam came strolling in. “Did you call—Hey, Demon, what the hell are you doing here?”

  With Adam standing beside Ada, Joe’s gaze quickly went from one to the other, and the truth was so jarring he couldn’t believe it. This woman was his twin, making him the brunt of a cruel joke, and they were all in on it. Mixed in with all the laughter and the pointing, came Vinnie’s taunting voice.

  “Hey, I warned you. I told you it wasn’t over, big guy.”

  “You mean you…just because I…” As his words faded Joe looked again at the crowd making fun of him. Their taunting laughter grated on him, and the fingers that were pointed in his direction seemed long and sharp. He suddenly turned and looked at Adam, who was staring at him along with all the rest. That was the breaking point. The very moment when he felt so crushed and humiliated that he couldn’t stand it. He quickly turned and ran, pushing himself through the crowd, stumbling over desks and chairs with his head bowed in shame until he found the front door, burst through it and ran. He continued to run down the street, around corners, bumping into pedestrians, and even ran light after light with horns honking, and cabbies burning rubber to keep from hitting him.

  Later, he found himself standing at the chief’s desk stripping himself of all his false credentials, turning in his gun permit, and throwing the well-used file down on the chief’s desk, and heading toward the door. “I quit. I’m through. I’m going home now, and I’m going to plan a very long vacation.”

  “Eddie…”

  “No,” Eddie said. “I’ve been through enough hell for one man. I don’t care what you say, what argument you come up with, I’m out of here. I’m taking a well-deserved vacation, and I don’t know when I’ll be back…if ever.”

  Chapter 4

  AFTER a very disturbing phone call from the Chief of Police, Adam learned that Eddie Scarlett, alias Joe King, had quit the force because of the humiliation he had suffered at the hands of some lunatic at KingStar. Adam’s ears burned with the news. Obscenities and swear words he’d never even heard came gushing out of the chief’s mouth, and Adam offered no excuses, asked for no forgiveness because he knew the chief was right. Instead, as he stood listening with regret building in him, he was already planning what he would do to make all this right.

  He only prayed that he could.

  Feeling sick at the news, he managed to gather everyone at KingStar in the conference room where they listened with wide-eyed wonder at the incredible news that Adam had to give them.

  “Do you know who Joe King really was? Do you have any idea?” Adam asked, looking around the room, his eyes boring holes in every one of them. “He’s an undercover cop that was planted in our midst to catch the notorious Lady Killer that’s loose in the city who they learned is working here. Thanks to all of you
his tenure got cut short when he became a victim of Vinnie’s sick joke.”

  A soft buzz began to rise among them when each one began pointing fingers at Vinnie.

  “No! Vinnie’s not alone in this. You’re all to blame. You listened to him, each one of you. Knowing how Vinnie was, you acted like children instead of responsible adults. Someone should have taken it upon themselves to warn him about Vinnie, and his sick sense of humor.”

  “Was it my fault he quit the fuckin’ force?” Vinnie yelled at everyone. “I didn’t do nothin’.”

  “You didn’t do…nothin’?” Adam yelled back. “You played the nastiest joke of the century on him, Vinnie. You had him believing I had turned myself into a woman, for God’s sake. What the hell were you thinking?”

  “Who knew he’d believe it? I didn’t know who he was. How was I to know he was a cop doing undercover work here? Hell, it was the perfect setup. He was always asking questions about you, and you were in Sweden, and…hell, he spilled coffee on me…”

  “He spilled coffee on you? That’s why you did this? Vinnie, I don’t think it was because of the coffee he spilled all over you. I think it was because he turned you down. That’s what you really can’t stand, isn’t it?”

  “All right, yeah.” Vinnie looked around at the others. “Sure, maybe he did turn me down, but that coffee was hot!”

  “The whole office, Vinnie. You had the whole friggin’ office in on this. Did he have the whole office in that room when he refused your advances, and spilled coffee all over you? No. It was done in the privacy of the coffee room.”

  “Privacy? With them damned cameras everywhere?”

  “The night watchman supervises those cameras, and all he does is pull the tape out, date them, and stick them in a file. The fact is, no one knew but you and Joe. That was a clear overreaction on your part, Vinnie. It was something a child would do, not a grown man. When you get it in for someone you don’t fool around, do you? This was a private matter that should have stayed between you and Eddie, but stupid ass that you are, you chose to tell the world. Who looks like a fool now?”

  “Okay, okay, I guess I owe him an apology.”

  “You owe him a lot more than that, but I doubt he would spit on you to put out the blaze if he saw you on fire.”