Sanctuary Lost

by Moira Rogers

  “It’s not something I learned from being a wolf,” he admitted, covering her hand with his. “I learned a long time ago, Brynn. Some people are just…bad. Wishing anything good or fair for them is useless.”

  It made her laugh, though the sound was edged with hysteria. “Christ, Joe. I wanted to work in politics. I saw greed and corruption and some seriously fucked-up skeletons in closets. I thought I was past feeling naïve about how fucking bad the world can be.”

  He didn’t offer any more platitudes, just drew her closer. The swing squeaked softly as they rocked in silence. The only other sounds were of the wind playing through the heavy pine branches and the murmur of voices from inside the house.

  It was soothing enough that she felt disappointed when the door opened and Samantha’s soft voice floated out. “We’re ready.”

  Joe stood and helped her up. When he guided her through the back door, there were even more people seated at and around the table in the kitchen.

  Gavin raised his hand. “Over here, Brynn.”

  He gestured to a large chair at the head of the table, the chair he’d occupied the last time she’d been here. He pulled it back and held it for her with an encouraging smile, and she lowered herself gingerly.

  Samantha took the seat directly to Brynn’s right, and smiled as she reached out to cover her hand. “No one expects you to get all the names straight, but let me introduce you to our guests.”

  Brynn had long since learned the trick of matching names to faces, one that had proved useful in her chosen profession. She studied the werewolves as Sam introduced them, picking out their defining characteristics out of habit and committing them to memory.

  Bobby and Anna, from Green Pond, Alabama, were a young couple, both with bright blue eyes and cheerful, relaxed smiles. Anna gave her an encouraging wink, and Bobby nodded and welcomed her with a Southern drawl that seemed a tad too overdone to be real.

  Next came Paul and Hazel, the alphas from Dutch Harbor, Alaska. Paul was massive, with a face that looked carved from granite and shoulders that might as well have been. Beside him, Hazel looked tiny, though she was probably taller than Brynn herself. While Paul greeted her with a curt nod, Hazel simply studied Brynn with exotically tilted brown eyes and remained silent.

  Albert and Mary were from nearby St. Anthony, Idaho, and proved to be the first real surprise. Though Sam introduced them as the alpha pair, she mentioned that Albert’s wife, Sally, had remained home to take care of a sick child. Brynn had always assumed alphas were all couples, but Mary seemed completely oblivious to the quiet, reserved man at her side.

  In fact, Mary spent most of the introduction staring at Joe with a look that was far too familiar for Brynn’s liking.

  The final couple was Cameron and Evelyn, the alphas from Arcadia, Kansas. Evelyn had gorgeous blonde hair and a perfect smile that looked a little condescending, but Brynn didn’t sense malice in the woman as much as a gentle doubt that a girl Brynn’s age could have anything useful to say. Cameron greeted her with a weary smile as he ran a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair.

  Sam reached the end of her introductions and nodded to Keith, who was leaning against the counter behind Paul and Hazel. “Keith’s already told them the basics of what happened, sweetheart. You can tell us as much as you’re able about what happened to you.”

  Brynn nodded and closed her eyes for a few seconds to find that quiet place inside her where nervousness faded and left her clear-headed and confident.

  Then she told her story.

  He wanted to destroy something.

  For the tenth time in as many minutes, Joe searched out Keith, catching his gaze. Keith stood there, stone-faced, eyes blank, and Joe knew his rage found a mirror in his friend and mentor.

  His short nails bit into his palms hard enough to draw blood, and Brynn’s voice faded. Though she kept speaking and Joe heard her words, he no longer associated them with her. They were just words, a third-person account of something that had once happened to someone he knew.

  If he thought about the things she said happened to her, he’d slip into blind rage.

  The assembled alphas had no reason to hide their reactions. Shock and outrage seemed to be the prevailing mood of the room, though Anna had tears in her eyes and looked like she was holding herself back from swooping down on Brynn and folding her into her arms by sheer force of will.

  Mary was the only one who seemed mostly unaffected, but Mary barely seemed to be paying attention. She was too busy trying to catch his eye.

  He ignored her. She’d never made any secret of her desire for him to come to St. Anthony and challenge Albert for his position. Hell, Al might have even welcomed the chance to step down and spend more time with his wife and kids. But the last thing Joe wanted was to make himself miserable just to fulfill an instinctive need to rule and protect. He’d rather stay in Red Rock and let Gavin and maybe Keith boss him around forever.

  Murmurs rose around the table, and Joe gritted his teeth as Brynn told them about the type of men Matthews had chosen to bring to his cause. As she told them about Pierce.

  Joe lowered his eyes to the floor when Gavin began asking Brynn questions, the scene with Pierce replaying in his mind. If he’d had the slightest idea why Pierce had really been shucking his clothes when he busted through the door, they’d all be dead. Every single one of them.

  Movement caught his attention as Keith eased over to stand next to him. “You okay?”

  “Yes,” he grated. “No.”

  Mary tried to catch his eyes again, but this time Keith intercepted the look and scowled. She blinked, looking shocked, then her eyes narrowed and she turned to look at Brynn, something calculating in her expression.

  “Shit.” It was a soft whisper, barely loud enough for Joe to hear.

  “Trouble,” Joe murmured back. “Hell hath no fury, and all.”

  “Hell may not, but I sure do.”

  Joe squinted at Mary. “If she doesn’t stop looking at Brynn like that, I might have to change my personal rule about hitting alphas.”

  From across the room, Sam shot them both a quelling look, her eyes commanding. Keith fidgeted and tilted his head toward the porch. “Come on, Brynn doesn’t want us here anyway, and I stole Gavin’s cigarettes.”

  Keith smoking would normally signal the beginning of the apocalypse. Joe just sighed and turned for the door.

  Outside, he inhaled deeply and held the smoke in his lungs for a moment before exhaling. “I think I love you a little bit right now, Winston.”

  “Yeah.” Keith took a deep breath and scuffed his foot against the wooden slats of the porch. “Shit. Did you know it was that bad?”

  Joe considered that for a moment. “Well, she’s told me some stuff she wouldn’t tell you because of Abby. Not to mention there was a guy getting naked in the room with her when I busted in there to fetch her.” He took another drag from the cigarette. “I figured some of it out. Doesn’t make it easier to hear, though.”

  “Shit,” Keith said again. “Shit, Abby would have a fucking fit. She’d march back to Helena and try to strangle Matthews with her bare fucking hands.”

  It didn’t sound like a bad idea to him. “Terrible idea.”

  Keith snarled and dropped his cigarette to the deck so he could stomp it out with one booted toe. “Fuck, I wish she’d told me before. It was bad enough when Matthews was changing the power-hungry, selfish assholes, but changing sick fucking serial-killing freaks is a different level of deranged. Least there’s not a lot of question about what the other alphas will decide.”

  For the hundredth time, Joe wished he’d been able to hold off Matthews’ men long enough for Keith to finish the alpha off. “We almost had him. I fucked it up.”

  “It wasn’t the objective. Getting the girls safe was the only thing that mattered.” Keith leaned back against the side of the house and closed his eyes. “Now the only thing that matters is keeping them safe.”

  “Yeah, and it’s turn
ed out to be easier said than done.”

  “You slept with her.”

  Joe had been waiting for the accusation all day. He finished his cigarette and flashed Keith a bland look. “You gonna get in my face about that now?”

  “Honestly? I don’t know what to say. I had no damn idea how much she’d been through, and she’s got to be screwed up by it. Jesus, Joe. Just tell me you know what you’re doing.”

  “I do.” At least, he’d had himself mostly convinced that he did. Now, he wasn’t so sure. “I think.”

  “Damn it. I wish we were going to have time for things to settle down. Abby and Brynn deserve a chance to deal with the shit that’s happened to them before we drag them into a war.”

  “I think we all do, Keith,” Joe answered heavily. “But we’re not going to get it.”

  “No, we’re not. Please tell me Brynn’s at least decent with a gun.”

  Joe held out his hand for another cigarette. “She could use some more practice, but she did okay.”

  “Abby said she was anti-gun or something, so I was worried.” Keith shook two more cigarettes free from the battered pack and handed one to Joe.

  “Politics.” Joe snorted as he rolled the cigarette between his fingers. People had all sorts of ideas about the world and how it should work, how they would do things. Those ideas were usually shot to hell and back when it came down to survival. “Brynn can get it done, if she has to.”

  “Good.” Keith lit his cigarette and took a long drag before blowing the smoke up into the air above his head. “Because, at this rate, she may have to.”

  Joe pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes. “How do you deal with this shit, Keith? With people coming after Abby?”

  “I kill them.” Keith’s voice sounded flat. “At least you have one thing going for you. Brynn doesn’t seem like the type to go running into the middle of a fight. I’m still trying to convince Abby she’s got to learn how to fight before she goes warrior princess on me. She says she will, but her damn instincts override everything else.”

  “Abby does all right.” He could still see the man who’d come for them while Keith was out of town, broken and beaten. “She wields a mean fireplace poker.”

  “Yeah, well, she’s going to be wielding one professionally now. She’s been getting lessons on using makeshift weapons.”

  “You ever think we’ll lose?” Though they were his own words, the question stunned him. “I mean, it’s like you said. They’re building armies. Armies of people like Pierce.”

  Keith shook his head. “That’s why we won’t lose. Yeah, the fact that they’re all nuts and self-obsessed means they’ll do things we can’t predict but, in the long run, we’re smarter. We’re saner. We’ve got more riding on this shit. And if all goes well, we’ll have magic. Real magic.”

  Which meant so much was riding on Brynn and how much the other alphas sympathized with her. “What do you think? She has Bobby and Anna already. Maybe Paul.”

  “Albert will sympathize because of what Sally went through, if Mary doesn’t railroad him just out of spite. He looks like he’s getting tired of trying to keep her under control.”

  “She’s definitely looking to trade him in.”

  “Yeah.” Keith shot him a look. “Might be easier for Brynn if you let me run Mary off. She’s a jealous type.”

  Joe met Keith’s look with a cheeky grin. “I can handle it.”

  His friend rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I know it won’t be the first time a couple girls have fought over you, you egotistical ass.”

  “Not by a long shot.” It would be the first time an alpha fought with a human, though. “Mary seriously needs to back off. If she starts hassling Brynn…”

  “That’s why you should let me deal with her. Mary, I mean.” Keith snorted. “Brynn is all yours.”

  The words shouldn’t have sent a thrill of satisfaction shooting through him. He glanced in the window to where Brynn sat, Gavin’s hand wrapped around hers. “After Matthews is gone, she can go back to Helena.”

  “If she wants to,” Keith agreed quietly. “I know Gavin would be happy if she didn’t make the choice to become one of us out of terror. Hell, we’d all be happy.”

  If she wasn’t scared when she made the choice, it could mean she was thinking of being with him. Both options terrified him. “It would be better.”

  Joe heard the sound of soft footsteps and turned in time to see Sam ushering Brynn toward the door. Keith pulled it open, cursing softly when Brynn glanced up. Her eyes looked red, and Joe could smell the salty tang of tears.

  He dropped the unlit cigarette and held open his arms, helpless to do anything else. “Come here.”

  Brynn stepped into his arms and pressed her forehead against his chest. Sam caught Joe’s gaze over her head. “Keith can probably fill you in on everything else later, if you want to take her home now.”

  “Thanks, Sam.” Joe lifted Brynn to his chest and headed down the steps and around the house.

  When he reached the truck, he kissed her temple as he opened the door for her. “Bad?”

  “Mostly just the questions. One or two were a little…aggressive, but the ones who were sympathetic were worse.” She shifted slightly on the truck seat and leveled a flat look at him. “You should go back, Joe. You said this stuff was important. I’m a little shaken up, but I’m fine.”

  “This is Keith’s baby,” he reasoned. “They don’t need me.”

  “Oh, bullshit. They need you, and you need to know what’s going on.”

  He tapped the top of the truck and pulled his keys from his pocket. “Can you make it to Keith and Abby’s all right?”

  She rewarded him with a relieved smile as she slipped from the truck. “Is it okay if I just walk? It’s not that far, and I could use the fresh air.”

  He hesitated. “Brynn, if there are people coming into town, into Keith’s house, then I don’t know if you should be walking around alone.”

  “Okay.” She didn’t argue, just smiled at him and reached out to take the keys from his hand. “If anyone jumps out at me, I’ll run them over.”

  It was a better idea than walking. “Too bad I traded the armored tank.” He wrapped a hand around the back of her neck and kissed her quickly. “I’ll be back later. Be safe.”

  “I will be.”

  He watched as she slid into the driver’s seat, started the truck, and lifted her hand to wave. A crunch of gravel sounded behind him as Brynn backed the truck up slowly, and he heard Keith’s quiet voice. “She’ll be okay.”

  Joe blinked, cursing the setting sun as it stung his eyes. “What’s it like in there? Anyone thrown anything yet?”

  “Anna’s going to knock Mary’s teeth down her throat in about twenty seconds, and I didn’t want you to miss that.”

  “Well, hell. Let’s get in there before we miss the show.”

  It was after midnight when they climbed into Keith’s Jeep. “I feel like I just babysat a bunch of kids,” Joe grumbled.

  “Half of those kids are over a century old.”

  “Doesn’t matter. They still bicker like they’re all in grammar school.”

  Keith laughed as he shifted the Jeep into gear. “Yeah, but it was sort of worth it to see cute little Anna almost punch Mary.”

  “Highlight of the evening.” Joe rubbed the side of his face wearily. “Brynn’s going to be disappointed.”

  “I don’t know. You saw her face when she came out. I think maybe she already knows.”

  “Maybe.” He stared out the window, his mood blackening. “It sets us back. Makes it harder to fight.”

  “We’ve got a few more days. People will talk tonight, and tomorrow before the moon rises. Maybe Bobby and Anna and Paul will be persuasive enough.”

  Joe didn’t speak again until they stopped in front of Keith’s house. “Do you ever wish you’d been born human?”

  Keith turned off the Jeep and pulled the keys from the ignition. He stared at them, turning them absent
ly in his hand. “I don’t know. Sometimes it makes it harder. I’ll never understand what you went through, much less what Abby went through. But I don’t hate the human world like some wolves who are born to it. I went out and tried to become a part of it.”

  Joe closed his hand around the door handle. “I don’t want Brynn to regret any of the choices she makes.” Not the way he had.

  “I’m sorry, Joe.” Keith’s voice was quiet and filled with regret. “I’m sorry I dragged you into this life to begin with.”

  “You didn’t. I dragged myself into it because I couldn’t keep my brain out of my pants.” Even as he spoke the words, Joe knew they were unfair. Good or bad, he’d loved Tamara. For all her faults, he was pretty sure she’d loved him, too. “Anyway, I made my own choices, and they’re on me. Couldn’t blame anyone else, even if I wanted. Which I don’t, because it’s a pretty good life.”

  “Except for times like this.” Keith scrubbed a hand over his face and sighed. “You know what visiting alphas means. Formal introductions and the whole full moon shebang. Sometimes I hate the old ways.”

  It would keep him away from Brynn longer than strictly necessary, but it had to be done. “It’s been a while since we had a really good howl. Besides, you’d better get used to it. You’ll be hosting things like this yourself soon enough.”

  If anything, Keith looked more miserable. “Thanks. That makes it all better.”

  “It’s not so bad. Usually.”

  “Yeah. Talk to me again when Gavin puts me in charge and you have to do all the second-in-command shit.”

  Joe snorted. “If I weren’t helping you with it already, I’d stay with Brynn tomorrow night.”

  “Traitor.”

  “We’ll both help Gavin,” Joe reminded him. “We’ll do it because he’s the alpha and it’s our job, but also because he needs us, especially with all the visitors. So quit your bitching. They’ll be gone soon enough.”

  “Yeah, I guess.” Keith climbed out of the truck. “You want me to tell Brynn?”

  “I think I’d better handle this one. Thanks, though.”