At Arm's Length

by Amber Nation

  For a bit, I concentrated on the ornate scrollwork on the banisters and could only imagine the amount of work and dedication it took to make this place a possibility. To love something so much that you would do whatever you had to do to make sure your dream became a reality. In a way it made me think of my own career. I busted my ass to get where I was, and look at what I was doing. Pissing it away because I couldn’t control my fists. Of course, the reasoning behind the use of force doesn’t matter; my own coach couldn’t be bothered to let me explain. All he saw was that his cocky asshole of a player was making headlines once again. I kicked my speed up another notch, going as fast as I could without tripping and falling flat on my face.

  My breath came out in heavy pants as my thoughts immediately turned back to those involving Marlee. Images of her body dripping and writhing beneath me as she begged to be stuffed full of my cock.

  I’m no good for her, hell I’m the last fucking thing she needed.

  She deserved to be pampered and worshipped by a man who was equally as good as she was. Not some man who was a major fuck up and couldn’t get his shit together. But the very thought of her with someone else had me seething with rage.

  Sweat soaked through my shirt and was dripping down my back when I finally decided to call it quits. My plan was to quickly peek in on Marlee before I went to take a shower.

  I jerked out my earbuds and shoved them in my pocket then reached my arms to grasp the back of my shirt and pulled it over my head before yanking my arms free. As I peeked around the door into Marlee’s room, I noticed her crumpled bedsheets but no Marlee.

  “Pixie?”

  A light illuminated from underneath the bathroom door, and my first thought was that she was getting sick again. I didn’t hesitate before I burst in through the door, but I stopped dead in my tracks from the scene before me.

  She wasn’t getting sick. Rather than she was standing in the middle of the rug, fresh from the shower with a towel wrapped around her soaking wet body.

  Tiny droplets of water were casually trailing their way along her shoulder and down her arms until they fell onto the plush carpet. I wanted to be those beads of water, caressing her skin.

  Her doe-eyed expression almost had me cursing my jump to conclusions until heat flared in her eyes in the next moment. The way her chest rose and fell with each labored breath snared my attention next. If she allowed the towel to slip through her fingers would her nipples swell into stiff peaks once the cool air hit them? Would she let me touch them or run my tongue between the valley of her breasts?

  I hadn’t realized that my own breath rivaled hers, and my hands were gripping my discarded t-shirt so tightly that my knuckles were white.

  I wanted this woman.

  Fuck that, I needed this woman. I had to keep strong and remember that she deserved better. It was a painful admission, but it was definitely for the best.

  But then she removed her hands from their perch on top of her towel allowing the cloth to drift along to her feet.

  Have mercy.

  Every thought about how I should keep my distance took a flying leap, along with my name, address, and birthdate.

  Now, why’d she have to go and do that? As she stood naked in front of me with a tempting smile on her face, my mind could only come up with one word, and it was screaming it loud and clear…MINE!

  When I opened my eyes, there were three things that I knew for certain. One—that I no longer felt like death which I considered a major win and the most important news. Two—that popcorn ceilings were sadly outdated, and I never really noticed how much it looked like cottage cheese…gross! And three—that I was bundled up like a flipping cocoon, and it felt like I was in a sauna because of it. I had on far too many layers, and I needed to remedy this now.

  Once I extracted myself from the confines of my bedsheets, I pitched my legs over the side of my bed until my wool-covered feet hit the floor. I stood slowly just to test the waters in case a wave of nausea decided to hit, but once the coast was clear, I stretched my hands high above my head and couldn’t for the life of me remember the last time I felt so rested.

  I wondered how many hours I was out. On a normal basis, I got maybe five hours of sleep a night at best.

  Speaking of, where in the world was Holden? I vaguely remembered practically begging him to stay with me until I fell asleep. That along with actually getting sick in front of the guy, I honestly wouldn’t blame him one bit if he headed for the hills.

  How embarrassing.

  But he didn’t, and there was something to be said about being taken care of. I liked it.

  I padded into the bathroom, deciding that I needed to quickly relieve myself before I went in search of Holden. As I stood in front of the sink to wash my hands, I stared in horror at my reflection.

  “Jesus Christ,” I shrieked at my oil-caked face and cheeks then gasped as I ran my hand over the rat’s nest that was my hair. And was that? I immediately snapped my hand away and leaned in a bit closer to the mirror.

  Oh for the love of Pete.

  There was vomit.

  In.

  My.

  Hair.

  I didn’t remember going all exorcist with my upchuck, but the proof was in the soiled strands of my blonde hair.

  This just wouldn’t do. In order to feel marginally human again I had to take a shower, and not to mention that I just couldn’t face Holden again now that I saw firsthand the aftermath of my fun-filled sickness.

  Standing underneath the unrelenting spray, I lamented on just how much this was needed. Squeezing a liberal dollop of shampoo into my palm, I took the extra needed time lathering my hair and washing it not once, but twice. Then made sure that every body part got a good, generous scrub.

  All the while I was telling myself it would feel rejuvenating to be thoroughly cleansed and not at all because of Holden. But we all know how that goes. I couldn’t get our kiss out of my head. And would it be extremely forward of me to say that I wanted to do it again, preferably without me ruining it by getting sick afterward.

  I shut off the water and blindly tried to reach around outside of the curtain to grab my towel off of the hook. It wasn’t until I was wringing out any excess water from my hair did I realize that I forgot to bring any clothes into the bathroom with me. I took the thick towel and wrapped it around my body having to hold the two ends of the material together because it just wasn’t long enough. Mental note, buy longer towels. Carefully stepping over the edge of the tub, I went to remove the towel to begin drying myself off, and I immediately stopped dead in my tracks when I heard movement in my bedroom.

  “Pixie?”

  My heart fluttered when Holden called out the nickname he’d given me, then the flutter turned to absolute panic as I tightened my grip on the towel. Surely he wouldn’t come in here. Answering him would’ve deemed my panic unnecessary, but my voice took a hike during my moment of alarm. So I was proven wrong when he wrenched open the door and burst into the bathroom like a bat out of hell.

  He was out of breath, and his beautiful bare chest was shining with sweat.

  Instant relief seemed to hit him as he released a long breath. He was concerned, that much was apparent. I glanced down at myself and gasped regarding my state of undress. Embarrassment flooded my cheeks at being caught fresh from the shower, and I suddenly wished that the towel had a few more inches of material. That was until his expression of concern turned heated, and his hands knotted in the t-shirt he was holding, causing the corded muscles in his forearms to strain.

  The temperature in the bathroom hiked a few more degrees, because did I mention that he was bare-chested? You couldn’t be around a man who looked like Holden and not feel the need to fan yourself.

  His gaze was honed in on my bare thigh that was subtly peeking through the split material in the towel. Then his eyes traveled so slowly up my body, and I wanted so badly for it to be his hands instead. The way he looked at me as if he wanted to strip me bare and devo
ur me sent a delicious thrill up my spine. My posture straightened as my breasts swelled, silently begging for his touch. Finally, his perusing ceased as he came upon my face and I watched, fascinated as his Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed roughly. It was liberating to know that he was as affected by me as I was by him. Which was part of what speared my desire and drove me to do what I did next.

  The other reason was because he took care of me without precursors or any questions asked. He took care of me as if it would pain him if he didn’t.

  Slowly I lifted my fingers that were gripping onto the edge of the towel one by one until I had completely released the material. Allowing it to fall in a bunch around my feet.

  This feeling of forwardness was completely new to me, but I needed to learn to face my wants and desires head on and go for them. And right now, I wanted nothing more than the man standing before me.

  I took a tentative step forward in his direction, pausing to allow my intentions to be clear. “I don’t want to get you sick.”

  He nodded his head in understanding, his jaw clenched tightly, and the bathroom was just quiet enough to hear his teeth grinding against each other. He finally opened his mouth to speak for the first time since bursting into the bathroom. “Are you feeling all right?” His gaze was set on the ceiling, and you could just tell that he was trying his damnedest not to look at my naked body. This altercation was affecting him. I was affecting him.

  It was my turn to nod, forcing him to look at me for my response. And when he did, the corner of my mouth turned up into a small, tentative smile. I’d made up my mind and was going for it. “You took care of me…” I left it open as a statement rather than a question because the answer was obvious.

  Holden dropped his bunched shirt onto the floor and announced, “Oh fuck it.” That was all it took, my feet carried me two steps, and I launched myself in his direction. He caught me with ease in his embrace and immediately shoved a hand into the wet strands of my hair as his lips attached to my own. My arms wrapped around his shoulders forcing my breasts to smash against his torso just as soon as his tongue plundered into my mouth.

  Our kiss was wild and reckless and completely unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. I could only think of how amazing his lips felt against mine and how much more I wanted. And I decided that I wasn’t going to be afraid to ask for it.

  I broke our kiss attempting to catch my breath, but that didn’t dissuade Holden in the least. His mouth never left my skin as he peppered kisses down my jaw and along the line of my neck. He spun me around until my back hit up against the wall as he ground his covered erection into my bare core. His touch was gentle with just the slightest amount of necessary roughness, enough to make a woman gasp for more.

  My head arched to give him easier access, and I begged in between ragged pants, “More, Holden. I need more.”

  His hand untangled from my ravaged hair as he cupped the globes of my ass firmly in his grasp and moved toward my bed. “Anything, Marlee,” he said with a smirk. The next thing I knew I was being thrown through the air landing on my back in the middle of my bed. Holden didn’t waste any time before he was back in my line of vision making his way up my body by placing random open-mouthed kisses on various places on my body.

  He nipped at my hipbone which had me involuntarily thrusting my pelvis up off of the bedsheets as a shiver went up my spine. The cool air hit my breasts making my nipples harden with the anticipation of what was to come. Holden had lit a fire deep inside me, and only he could ease the growing ache between my legs. His playfulness was so unlike the man I first encountered that I actually hoped that it was me who brought it out of him. He continued his teasing yet torturous little nips until he reached my breasts, and that was when he stopped touching me completely.

  He looked at me and seemed to be searching for something deep in my eyes. His hand lifted toward my face, and he brushed back a wayward strand of wet hair with his rough fingertips until it was pushed back away from my face. All with a tender expression on his face that almost brought a tear to my eye, he asked with the utmost concern, “Are you sure you’re feeling all right?”

  Regardless of how I was feeling, I could stop things from progressing any further between us here and now. Having the knowledge that he cared enough to ask proved to me that he was a good man, regardless of the image he tried to portray. There was nothing that was going to stop me, stop us from having what we each so desperately craved.

  “I’m fine, Holden,” I cupped his cheek in my palm, “I want this. I want you.”

  No sooner were the words out of my mouth did Holden’s head dip attaching his lips to my breast, sucking my nipple deep into his mouth.

  “Oh shit,” I gasped as a feeling of euphoria traveled through my veins.

  His fingers kneaded into the flesh of my left butt cheek as he hiked up my leg hooking it around his hip. His mouth released my breast, and he stuck out his tongue, licking a path up my sternum. “I’m making you all dirty again. I’ll just have to be sure to immediately get you into the shower after I fuck you.”

  “You want to take a shower with me?”

  “You have no idea, sweetheart. I wanted to get you into the shower about five minutes after laying eyes on you. I have to supervise and make sure that every single inch of your body gets clean.” He shrugged a shoulder. “You know, out of complete obligation since I’m the one dirtying you up.” A hand went between my parted thighs and a moan released from my throat as he swiped a finger through my slick folds.

  “You’re wet for me.” His voice took on a huskier tone. He slipped a finger inside of me before adding another and groaned as he buried his head into my neck. “Hot and so goddamn tight. Jesus Christ, Marlee, what are you doing to me?”

  With his fingers artfully massaging against the spot inside me that had me on the verge of seeing stars, it was hard to concentrate on what he was saying. “Pretty sure Jesus Christ and goddamn shouldn’t be used in the same sentence, let alone the same breath.”

  “You talk way too much sometimes.”

  “I have been told this a time or two. But you should know that an insult isn’t going to get your penis near my vagina.”

  “Oh, is that what’s happening here?” He thrust his hips so his erection dug into my side, and even with his bottom half still fully clothed, I could tell it was impressive. I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip and nodded because that was what I was hoping was happening here. “It wasn’t an insult, sweetheart. I like that you love to talk, especially when you blurt out what’s on your mind. I was just going to see if I could find a way to get you to stop talking for a bit.” His thumb circled around my clit indirectly teasing me without giving me what I needed. “I want to know what makes you squeal.” Holden finally touched my clit with the most feather-light of touches, but it seemed to make the most impact. My arousal somehow spiked up a notch, and despite his fingers giving me constant pleasure, my body still needed more. He removed his fingers and stuck his saturated digits into his mouth, tasting my arousal. I was sure that my cheeks rivaled my embarrassment, but Holden growled and shook his head letting me know in no uncertain terms that I had absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about.

  He pushed himself off of the bed and left the room without a backward glance.

  Stunned was taking things a bit too lightly. My stomach sank, and the rejection stung. I lifted onto my elbow, trying to plan what to say next when he appeared back in the doorway just as quickly as he left. I quirked an eyebrow as he held up a square package, then opened his hand allowing the condoms to fall down in a strip.

  My eyes bulged as I mentally counted between each and every perforation. “That sure of your abilities?” Every guy I had been with, not that there had been many, were the one-and-done type. One orgasm was their limit before they turned to their side and passed out.

  He ripped off a foil package, throwing the rest of them on my bedside table. “Sweetheart, I want to learn what makes you tick, includin
g all the things that you like during sex. And I have a feeling that using all of those,” he hitched a thumb indicating toward the remaining discarded condoms, “won’t even scratch the surface.”

  He placed the wrapper in between his teeth and looped his thumbs inside the waistband of his shorts before pulling them straight down to his ankles.

  Now this wasn’t the first time I had seen his package, but it was the first time I felt comfortable with actually looking. Gawking seemed to be a more suitable word because let’s face it, that’s exactly what I was doing. I’ve never referred to a penis as beautiful before, but there was no other way to describe it. That certain appendage was a thing of art. I swallowed roughly as he ripped open the package and rolled the condom down his hard length as it bobbed. How on earth would that fit inside of me? A delicious thrill overtook me because I couldn’t wait to find out.

  “Ding, ding, ding. Pixie, I think we have a winner.”

  My eyebrows rose in confusion.

  “All I have to do to render you speechless is flash you a little peen.”

  “I hate to break it to you or in your case, over inflate your ego, but that is definitely not a “little peen”.” It was actually more along the lines of the holy grail of penises. I sure hoped that he knew how to use it.

  “You’re thinking too hard.”

  “What I’m thinking is that if you take much longer, I’m going to have to take matters into my own hands.” To reiterate the fact that I wasn’t joking, I slowly ran my hand down my body resting my fingers just above my small thatch of curls.

  Before I knew what was happening, my hand was ripped away, and Holden drove into me to the hilt with one delicious thrust.

  “Holy fuck, Marlee,” he gritted out between clenched teeth. He continued thrusting inside of me bringing me to the very brink of orgasm before backing off.

  We flopped back on the bed in a sweaty heap, our breaths coming out in ragged pants. My heart was beating frantically in my chest; I felt like this was a pivotal moment, and I had one of two choices. Freak the fuck out at the monumental feeling deep within my chest, which was my first instinct, or embrace it.