by Paris Rose
Christoff led the way past several high-end shops and boutiques before stopping at Harry Winston. Opening the door for me, Christoff gestured for me to enter. The moment I crossed the threshold, I was dazzled by all of the stunning jewelry on display. The carefully positioned lights seemed to dance across the massive diamonds that lined the cases. I walked around in silence and awe. Christoff slid up behind me and placed his arm around my waist.
“I’m so completely captivated by you today, Gia. I feel like adorning that beautiful body of yours with some jewels. Go ahead, pick something out.” My heart skipped a beat. I was so flattered by Christoff’s generosity. He treated me so well. I felt so lucky to be with him. “You can have whatever you want, except for an engagement ring.” Christoff laughed before kissing me on the cheek.
I don’t know why, but my heart sank a little. I knew it was too early in our relationship to even be thinking about marriage, and I’m sure Christoff didn’t mean any harm by his comment, but I started to feel mild anxiety in the pit of my stomach. Christoff had never been married before, and everyone in the media said he wasn’t the marrying kind. His ex, Arianna, had confirmed it not too long ago. I started to panic that I would never get to live my dream of getting married and living happily ever after. I felt my spirits start to sink a little.
“I’ve never seen a girl look so sullen over the idea of her man buying her jewelry.” Christoff rubbed my shoulders. “I mean, you don’t have to pick out anything here. I could always get you some new socks and some new underwear if you would prefer something more practical.” Christoff smiled. He amused me so much. I couldn’t help but laugh.
“No, no socks.” I continued laughing. “I was being silly and thinking about something else. I’ll take the jewelry! You’re so sweet, Christoff. I really appreciate it.” I jumped into his arms and brought my lips to his. His kiss was delightful. I remembered we were in public and reluctantly pulled away from him. “You’re so sweet and so sexy.”
“Thank you, pretty girl. Now pick out your jewelry so we can get home and do our thing.” Christoff swatted me on the bottom so hard I squealed. The firmness in his touch turned me on.
I carefully perused the store. It’s not every day a girl gets to shop at Harry Winston. I didn’t want to take the experience lightly; I wanted to savor it. I felt so loved, so cherished and taken care of in this moment. I smiled to myself as I realized all of the hard times with Christoff were worth it. He made me feel like a queen. I didn’t want to take his generosity for granted, so I wanted to make sure I picked out a piece that I would wear every day, and, even though I knew that price wasn’t an object for Christoff, I didn’t want to be obnoxious and choose something that was too expensive.
I circled the perimeter of the store slowly and deliberately. Several pieces caught my eye, but none of them felt quite like me. I moved my way to a display case at the center of the floor. Wow! Everything in that case made me think of Elizabeth Taylor. The necklaces looked like something a classic Hollywood movie star would wear. I imagined myself wearing a necklace of bold, beautiful, perfectly cut diamonds. For a moment, the thought made me feel good, then, for a reason I couldn’t explain, I started to feel insecure inside. I think deep down, a part of me felt like I didn’t deserve something as classy, elegant, and valuable as the jewels in the center case. I felt too flawed to even think of wearing something so flawless. I took a deep breath to quell my feelings of inadequacy. I didn’t know where they were coming from. Today had been such a beautiful day with Christoff, and he had showed me so much love and attention. I wondered what was so broken inside of me that I would feel so insecure when I was shown the love and generosity of the man of my dreams. I nervously nibbled my bottom lip as I became lost in my own thoughts. I drifted toward the display case by the register in a daze. All of the jewelry started to blur together as something that didn’t belong to me and was too far out of my league to attain.
“May I help you pick something out?” The store clerk’s voice interrupted my thoughts. I looked up. She was a stunningly beautiful older lady with an air of sophistication.
“Thank you, but I’m oka—” A necklace sitting inside of an open box behind the register caught my eye mid-sentence. “Actually, can I take a closer look at the necklace behind the register? Is that one for sale?”
“I don’t think we’ll be able to sell it. Someone returned it because the diamonds weren’t clear enough, they’re flawed. We inspected it and agreed that it wasn’t good enough to be on our floor. We’re embarrassed that we ever put it out there in the first place. We pride ourselves on being upfront with our customers and only providing the best quality jewelry. If you really want to take a look at this necklace, I won’t stop you, but I want to be honest with you about the quality so there won’t be any surprises later.” She handed me the box.
As soon as I took it into my hands, it felt like mine. It was a white gold chain with a treble clef shaped symbol made of small diamonds. It looked perfect to me. I loved music, which was probably why the necklace resonated with me so much. I found it interesting that others found the diamonds to be imperfect when I perceived this as the most perfect piece in the entire store. The necklace reminded me of myself, and it also reminded me of Christoff, because its beauty was stunning yet reserved. Music was what brought Christoff and I together, and the treble clef was one of the most universal symbols for music. This necklace was perfect. I had to have it.
“This is it,” I whispered to myself. “Oh my God, I’m in love,” I gushed to the store clerk. I turned over my shoulder and called for Christoff. He was standing just a few feet behind me with a beaming grin on his face.
“Gia, baby, the look on your face makes me feel like the most amazing man in the world. I love seeing you so happy.” He embraced me from behind and kissed me on the cheek. I savored his touch. I felt euphoric.
“This is the one.”
“If you like it that much then I will make sure you have it. Consider it yours.” Christoff carefully took the necklace out of the box and put it around my neck. I pulled my hair up and allowed him to fasten the clasp. My heart was racing with excitement, and I felt tears of joy start to well in my eyes. “I know how considerate you are, Gia. I don’t want you to have any guilt or concern about the price, so I’m going to ask you to step outside for a few moments while I take care of this.”
“Thank you so much for your generosity, Christoff. I really appreciate all you do for me. Thank you!” I gave him a big hug and kissed him on the lips before turning to the store clerk. “Thank you so much for allowing me to look at the necklace even though it wasn’t on the floor. It’s the perfect piece for me.”
The store clerk was smiling. It looked like she had tears in her eyes.
“I’m glad you like it, sweetheart. I hope you enjoy it for a long time to come. It looks beautiful on you.”
“Thank you!” I gushed. “Christoff, I’ll be outside like you asked.”
“Okay, I’ll be out in a few. That necklace does look great on you, but I shouldn’t be surprised. Everything looks great on you.”
“Aww, stop it!” I giggled before walking out into the fresh air and warm sunshine. I was so elated. I allowed the warmth of the sun to wash over me as I basked in my love for Christoff. He always knew how to make my day. Agreeing to move to L.A. with him had to be one of the best decisions of my life. I took in a deep breath as I allowed myself to be filled with gratitude. I wondered how I got so lucky.
Sometimes I felt like I didn’t deserve the wonderful life that Christoff provided for me. I was just a lowly entertainment journalist. How could I have caught and kept the attention of a super sexy international rock star? Even some of the most beautiful and impressive women in the entertainment industry couldn’t hold his attention, so I knew there was no way I could. My mood started to dampen as I allowed my mind to go off on a tangent. I started to feel like there was no way that Christoff and I could last forever. I felt sick inside as I realize
d that one day the fairy tale would be over. They always say if it seems too good to be true, it is. Never had I dreamed that I would be dating and living with my celebrity crush one day. Those types of things aren’t supposed to happen in real life. I had dated men in the industry before, but, other than Trevor, I had never been with anyone on Christoff’s level, and never this intensely or for this duration of time. I wondered if Christoff took things between us as seriously as I did. I felt like he was the man I wanted to marry one day, but I didn’t know if he felt the same about me.
Clearly, I was bothered by his comment about not being allowed to pick out an engagement ring. I don’t know why the comment hurt my feelings so much, but it did. Although there was pretty good communication between Christoff and me, I didn’t feel comfortable bringing up the issue for discussion because I didn’t want him to think I was in a hurry to get married. I was afraid that if I seemed overeager or desperate for a more serious commitment, it may scare him off. I decided to keep quiet about being upset by his comment, and instead I would try to be grateful for the good time we were having. I tried to let it go, but my stomach still felt sour over it.
“All right, Gia, the new necklace is officially and legally yours now!” The sound of Christoff’s voice startled me out of my thoughts. I whipped my head around to see him smiling with open arms. I jumped into his embrace. His touch warmed my heart.
“Thank you! I’m so happy.” We held on to each other for a long time. It felt good. I pulled away and traced the necklace with my fingertips. “I know it sounds silly because it’s just jewelry, but this necklace already feels like an extension of me. I think I like it so much because I kind of see it as a symbol of our love for music, as well as our love for each other.” I felt my lips turn into an embarrassed smile. “Wait, does that sound corny?”
“No, I love it. It’s actually really deep. I love your intricate mind, Gia. I’m so happy I was able to give you a gift that has so much meaning for you. It makes me feel good.” Christoff grabbed my hand and led me down the walkway. “Now let’s get home so I can make you feel good. I’ve been hungry for you all day. I’m going to devour you.” Christoff leaned in and nibbled my earlobe. It turned me on so much, it gave me chills.
“You’re so bad, Christoff. I love it, though.” I giggled and squeezed his hand.
We walked in silence as we headed toward the car. There were a group of girls who looked to be college aged walking toward us in the opposite direction. I could tell they were daughters of rich daddies. There were four of them, so they were taking up the whole sidewalk. A tall, gorgeous, scantily clad redhead looked like the leader of the pack. She was wearing a black corset that her full breasts seemed to be overflowing out of, and she had on micro shorts, fishnets, and knee boots. Her fair skin was clear and perfect, and her red locks were long, thick, and glossy. She was stunning, and I could tell she knew it. She was walking slightly in front of her friends and talking loudly and making big dramatic gestures. I wouldn’t have been surprised if she was an actress. Even though we weren’t very close to them yet, I noticed her. I felt her staring at me and Christoff while she was talking, and it made me uncomfortable. When they were just a few feet in front of us, she lunged toward us and blocked our path.
“Oh my gawd! It’s Christoff Diemacht Hartmann!” She screamed obnoxiously as she jumped into Christoff’s arms, nearly knocking me over in the process. Her friends gathered around us. “I love your music, Christoff, and I must say you’re even hotter in person than in pictures. You’re so sexy! I love you!” She continued to squeeze him. Her affection for him made me queasy. She was hanging all over him. She didn’t even care that I was standing right there. “Oh my gawd! I have to get a picture with you. Kelsey, take a picture on my phone.” She dug in her bag and thrust her phone toward a petite blonde.
“I’ll take a few.” Kelsey smiled. “I can’t believe we’re meeting Christoff Diemacht Hartmann.” Kelsey jumped up and down.
“He’s mine, Kelsey, remember that.” The redhead glared at Kelsey. “Don’t worry though, you can have Johannes.” The redhead smiled and flipped her hair over her shoulder as she put her arm around Christoff and pressed her cheek against his.
“You’re lucky that I love you, bitch,” Kelsey quipped before she held up the phone and snapped a picture. Christoff smiled. I hated it. He and the redhead looked like the perfect happy Hollywood couple. It made me sick. That girl looked like a star, she was all over my man, and he wasn’t stopping her.
“Take a few more. I want to make sure they look good for Instagram.” The redhead kept her arm around Christoff and placed her other hand on his chest. She had to be a model; she really knew how to pose. I just stood there trying to keep my composure while her friends watched her impromptu photoshoot with my boyfriend in awe and wonder.
“One more.” She smiled and slid her hand from his chest, down his stomach to his crotch, and squeezed as she simultaneously kissed him on the cheek. The flash went off and her friends all squealed and gushed loudly. I couldn’t believe what I had just seen. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach. “Thank you, Christoff, I love you.” She kissed him on the cheek again, and her red lipstick left an imprint of her lips on his face. She ran over to her friends, who all hugged and high-fived her.
“Bye, Christoff.” The group of girls sang as they walked past us. The redhead blew a kiss. I was so angry that I didn’t know what to say. I just stared at Christoff for a few seconds. My heart sank. He was wearing very form-fitting jeans, and I swear I saw a bulge near his thigh. I walked up, reached between his legs, and grabbed him before he could follow my line of vision.
“What the fuck, Christoff? You let that girl give you a hard-on. I can’t believe this!” I turned my back to him and folded my arms. I was shaking. I couldn’t breathe. It felt like I was being smothered by the force of my own wrath. “You asshole! I can’t believe you just let that happen right in front of me.”
Christoff walked around me so that I was facing him. “Gia, I know you’re upset right now, but you don’t have to swear at me and call me names. That is completely out of line.”
“I’m out of line? You letting some random girl hang all over you and grope you is what’s ‘out of line.’” I was starting to raise my voice, even though I didn’t intend to. “That was really shitty of you.”
“Gia, first of all, it happened so fast that I couldn’t stop it. I didn’t know she was going to grab me like that. She’s a fan. I didn’t want to make a scene or be rude to her. If it ended up in the press that I was a jerk to a group of nice girls, it wouldn’t be good for my reputation. Even though I don’t like the attention, I have to be approachable. You’re a journalist, you know that.”
“Are you serious, Christoff? You’re worried about what it would do to your reputation if you were a jerk to a group of strangers, but you don’t give a shit about what being a total dick to your girlfriend would do to your relationship. I can’t believe you.”
“Baby, I understand why you’re upset. I know it looks bad, but these things are going to happen when you’re dating someone who’s in the public eye. What if I were an actor? I would have to do love scenes with other women. Would you get upset every time I did a movie?”
“Christoff, you’re not an actor, and this is not a movie. You’re a musician, and this is real life, and your behavior was disrespectful and hurtful. You allowed another woman to be all over you, and you enjoyed it so much that you were actually turned on by it while I was standing right there. That’s really messed up.”
“Gia, just because my body reacted doesn’t mean I’m into that woman. It was a purely biological response that I can’t help. I’m a very tactile person. When someone touches me, I react, whether I’m into them or not. That’s just how my body is. As for her being all over me, I was just allowing her to get her picture. It didn’t mean anything to me. I’ve taken hundreds of pictures like that with women before we met. I can’t stop being a celebrity just bec
ause it makes you uncomfortable.”
I just stared at him. I was so upset, my stomach was in knots. He grabbed my shoulder and looked into my eyes. Even when I was furious, his deep blue eyes were so captivating to me.
“Look, that came out kind of harsh. I admit that. Gia, baby, I am so sorry I hurt your feelings. That was not my intention. I really should have been more aware of how the situation would make you feel. I can’t undo what just happened, and, because of my line of work, I can’t even promise you it won’t happen again, but I can promise this: I don’t care how many beautiful women throw themselves at me. You must know that I’m always going home with you. You’re my baby, you’re my love—and no one else. I don’t want you to ever forget that. If you ever feel angry at me or threatened by another woman, I want you to talk to me like we’re doing now, and I promise you I’ll listen. I can’t stop you from feeling jealous, because I can’t control your feelings, but I’m hoping that no matter what happens, even in our worst moments, that necklace you’re wearing will remind you that I’m yours and only yours. Will you forgive me, Gia?” He opened his arms and reached out to embrace me.
I unfolded my arms and allowed my fingers to toy with my new necklace. I still wasn’t happy with Christoff’s behavior, but I appreciated the depth and sincerity of his apology. I wasn’t sure if I was cut out to date a rock star. The sick feeling in my stomach reminded me of how I’d felt when Christoff had taken Bianca Hathaway to the awards show instead of me. That memory reminded me of how I’d felt when I’d seen the way he looked at Arianna Turlington when she came to visit him at the hospital while I was there. Even though I knew Christoff was sorry, I couldn’t shake off the troubling feeling that one day he might run off with one or more of the beautiful women chasing after him. Everyone knew Christoff Diemacht Hartmann was a womanizer. I’d even known that before I met him. Even in my most insecure moments, deep inside I knew that I was an amazing woman, but, even so, I didn’t know if I had what it took to tame a man like Christoff. I was starting to feel it was rather naïve of me to think that Christoff and I could live happily ever after when he had a long history of having a wandering eye, in addition to the fact that he was served up with so much temptation on a daily basis.
