by S. Ferguson
I do a quick scan for Jake and I see he’s good, having taken cover with Greg behind a flipped over table.
And me? My dumbass is still standing in the exact same spot, in the middle of the fucking room, trying to figure out how no one managed to hit the six foot five inch, two hundred thirty pound man in the middle of the room.
I’m glad they didn’t, don’t get me wrong, but seriously, Ron needs to take his guys to the gun range or something.
Bree chooses that exact moment to burst through the doors. Alex is hot on her heels, a gun in his hand, as he tries to grab her arm, but she shakes him off.
She runs right past Tony’s guys, one of whom is bleeding badly from his stomach, straight towards me.
She runs to me.
I spend exactly one second looking at her before I throw her to the ground so hard that I’m gonna have to apologize later, and lay my entire body over her tiny one. All I can think is, “Please God let me be thick enough to stop a bullet.”
A few more seconds go by, and I realize ceasefire is still in place.
“Tony…you know damn well me shooting this fucking traitor,” he pauses to kick the side of Quinn’s body so hard it slides across the floor a few inches, smearing the blood that has pooled around Quinn’s head, “Isn't an attack on you. I’ll give you one, and only one more chance to come back to my office. We can finish this. You and I both know if we go to war, not only am I going to win but a lot of fucking people are going to die; guys with families…innocents. But first, I need answers about what this motherfucker wanted with my daughter,” Ron says giving Tony a look that I’m pretty sure could kill a lesser man on the spot before aiming it at Alex.
Alex visibly flinches before he remembers himself, and turns his face to stone.
Please take this last chance, please take it, I think over and over again.
I don’t wanna know what will happen if the bullets fly again. I don’t think I can be that lucky to avoid getting shot again, and I can’t choose between getting Bree out of here or staying with Jake.
Some choices are truly impossible to make.
Bree gasps when Ron says daughter. I wonder if she knows he’s referring to her. This is a clusterfuck.
Not to be confused with a candy bar.
24
Bree
I hear Ron mention his daughter and I know. I just know in my soul.
He’s talking about me.
I have hundreds of questions begging to come out, but I can’t see anything, and can barely breathe with Declan on top of me. I know he’s trying to help, but this isn’t going to work.
I shove at Declan’s chest, trying to get him to move.
“Not until I know they’re really done shooting,” he hisses at me.
“Get off me now!” I hiss right back.
I see Ron and Tony shake hands through a small space between my head and Dec’s arm.
“Stand down!” Tony barks to his men, who grudgingly comply.
Jake, Greg, and the other guys hesitantly lower their weapons but don’t put them back in their holsters yet. They stand, but don't flip the tables back over; they obviously want some cover readily available.
Declan gives a dramatic sigh, and then slowly rises to his feet. He pulls me up by my hands, and immediately places me behind him.
“Ron,” I whisper, giving him a pleading look.
“This her?” Tony asks, looking me up and down. It's not a sleazy look, but I still don’t like it. He’s assessing me.
If I am really Ron’s daughter, I’m not an idiot. I know that makes me a target.
“Not right now, darlin’. Let me take care of business, then I promise you, I’m all yours.” Ron runs his fingers through his hair, muttering something else under his breath that I don’t catch. He looks weary. I guess maybe the adrenaline rush is fading.
“That’s good, because you and I need to have a fucking conversation,” Declan says to me, while shooting daggers from his eyes at Alex.
“Hey, man, I’m out of this now,” Alex smirks and raises his hands in mock surrender.
He walks to the area by the bar’s doors where the rest of Tony’s men have gathered. I guess they’re not gonna risk getting far away from the door again.
“I promise, you and I will be having a conversation as soon as this is done,” Ron says again, before leading Tony back into his office.
25
Declan
I have so many different thoughts running through my head. Do I wait until Ron sorts this shit out with Bree before I tackle her with questions? Should I just grab her now, throw her over my shoulder, and run out of Keegan’s? Do I take her and tie her up to keep her safe and away from this fucked up mess? Or should I wait for her to initiate things? Well, never mind on that last one. If I know Bree at all, she won’t initiate shit.
“What was that?” I ask Bree, putting my hand on her lower back, and ushering her back behind the bar.
At least, if all hell breaks loose again, she can duck behind the bar. I take a moment and look for Jake. He’s finally sitting in a chair next to Greg, but he’s moved his chair, so his back is against the wall. He wants to make sure nothing can catch him off guard. I don’t blame him.
“Alex and I needed to clear the air. It was…closure, I guess?” Bree scrunches her nose up with a thoughtful look on her face. I resist the urge to kiss the tip of her cute, little nose.
Speaking of Alex, that fucker’s level of crazy must rival even Jake’s. Unlike the rest of his guys, who are still huddled by the door, he’s walking right into the middle of the room and taking a seat, like he doesn’t have a fucking care in the world.
The arrogant look on his face shows me this move was very intentional. He wants everyone to view him as the wildcard. Too bad I don’t give a fuck.
Bree looks in his direction, and gives a little chuckle, shaking her head and muttering, “He was always a crazy bastard.”
She starts acting like she’s just going to go back to work. I don’t know why, no one is drinking right now, and no one is going to risk coming to the bar and being a lone target.
“Wait,” I grab her arm gently. “I need to know what happened out there.” I jerk my head to toward the doors, indicating outside.
“I said goodbye.” She looks me right in the eyes as she speaks, and I see none of the pain in them I saw earlier.
“I needed to tell him how I felt. I had a lot to get off my chest. But, most importantly, I had to let him go.” Her eyes glaze over when she says that, but she doesn’t look sad, she looks… at peace.
I don’t even think about where we are, or how fucked up this is. I just grab her and pull her into my arms.
The amazing thing is she doesn’t resist. She wraps her arms around my waist, resting her head against my chest. I gently rest my cheek against the hair on top of her head and savor this moment.
I breathe in her familiar vanilla scent, and relish the calm it brings me.
“So we are…” I feel like an asshole, but I have to know.
“We are whatever we were before he walked into this bar. I don’t know where this is going, Dec, but I know I’m happy. Some of it is because of you, and some of it is because of me, because I’m taking care of me. Either way, I’m happy. I want to see where this goes.” She leans her head back, so her chin is resting on my chest.
“Oh, we’re something, B Girl. Don’t forget it, either. I’m not letting you go.” I lean down and kiss her. It's a quick thing, just a gentle brush of my lips against hers.
I hear someone give a cheesy wolf whistle, and I automatically aim my middle finger in Jake’s general direction, but Bree doesn’t hesitate to kiss me back.
“Unless I say I’m done. Then you have to let me go,” Bree says in a playful tone, once I break the kiss. I know it took courage for her to establish a boundary, and to put herself first. I like this new assertive Bree.
“You can try. I won’t ever force you into anything, but I’ll be everywhere y
ou are, doing everything I can, to prove to you that I’m worth it. That we’re worth it.” My tone is light, but I’m deadly serious.
“Ahem.” A throat clears near us, ruining our moment.
I turn my head toward the bar to see where our rude interruption is coming from. Alex. Will this fucker not go away and kick rocks or something?
“What the fuck do you want now?” I hiss, tightening my grip on Bree.
“I think I need to explain a few things to Bree. I can see now what she was trying to tell me outside. Look, I might be an asshole, but I can see she’s happy. I won’t try to fuck with that.” He raises his hands in a surrender gesture.
He seems to be really good at that. Fucking asshole.
Bree turns to face him as well. I keep my right arm tight around her waist, half in a show of possession and half because she grounds me.
As long as she's in my arms, I know everything will be okay.
“What do you think I need to know? “ Bree asks. She’s playing it cool, but I can feel the tension in her body.
“I lied…about a lot really.” Alex almost looks sorry, but of course, saying he lied isn’t exactly a revelation.
I know this guy is a gigantic douche, and I don’t know half of their history.
He takes a deep breath before continuing. “We didn’t run away because of you. We ran away because of me.” I can feel the shock course through Bree’s body.
“I used the situation you were in, knowing your mother was abusing you. I used it because I knew you would do anything to escape, and I knew I wasn’t going to make it on my own living on the streets. A beautiful, innocent, young girl is a commodity in the world we live in. I had been stealing from my parents. My dad had been threatening me with military school, or worse, with the cops. I knew I couldn’t handle going to jail, or someplace where you’re constantly on lockdown. You know how I feel about rules.”
I don’t appreciate this act, like he and Bree are good friends or something, but I can’t pretend they don’t have a history.
I vow then and there that, one day, she’s going to be closer to me than she ever was to this fucker.
I will fill every place in her heart he ever occupied.
“Why… why did you let me think it was all my fault? Why did you constantly tell me that the only reason we were on the streets was because of me? Whenever things were rough, you were all too quick to place the blame on me,” Bree says, leaning towards him and resting her hands on the bar.
I keep my hand glued to her hip. Satan himself couldn’t pry me off of her at this point.
“Because I’m an asshole. Because I didn’t want to accept that I was a failure. I was a punk and a thief on my best day. That’s still all I really am. You were this innocent, vulnerable girl that I saw an opportunity with. Once I heard about this place, I knew that Ron would take us in when he saw you. I didn’t know he was your dad…but I thought he would be able to… have a purpose for you.” Alex lowers his gaze in shame… that is if a thundercunt is capable of shame.
“You tried to sell me to Ron?” Bree’s tone is all business.
“I did. He took one look at you, and I think he must have known who you were. Or it could have been your age. I kind of portrayed you as older when I had told him about you. Ron’s a lot of things, we all are, but he’s not in the business of selling kids for sex.” Alex finally raises his gaze to meet hers.
I don’t know what he sees, but he almost looks afraid for a minute.
It’s kind of funny how when an abuser, whether emotional, physical or both, realizes their power is gone, they suddenly turn into chicken-shits. I saw the very same look on my own dad’s face when he realized Jake wasn’t his victim anymore.
He had died with that look on his face.
“I don’t even know how to feel about that or what to say. I’m just grateful Ron was a better man than you thought. A better man than you.” Bree doesn’t say it in an ugly tone, more like she’s just stating a fact.
“He was. He is. Look, once this meeting is over, I’ll be gone. I won’t be back again; it’s too risky for both Tony and I to be away. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I was a confused and scared kid, too. I made mistakes I didn’t think I could escape from. I still do. But, hey, at least I turned my criminal interests into something.” Alex gives a smirk and waves his hands to draw our attention to his expensive suit.
“I can’t judge you. I was young and naïve, too. I thought you hung the sun and moon, and I thought we were real. I can now see that was just a childish dream. Now, I know what love… what a relationship is supposed to feel like. I really hope you have a good life, Alex, but I’m done with you.” Bree pushes herself off the bar, and walks into the kitchen.
“You come near her again, I’ll fucking kill you,” I growl before turning to follow Bree into the kitchen.
“You can try.” Alex laughs behind me. I shoot him another angry glare before catching the kitchen door, and following Bree.
I imitate our first encounter in this very kitchen by backing her into the wall and leaning over her with both arms on the wall above her head.
Leave it to me to have a dusty, unused kitchen as the location for pivotal relationship moments.
“You love me, B Girl?” I ask, rubbing my nose against hers.
“I don’t know if I love you yet… but I can definitely see it. I see how much you care about me. I see how much I care about you, but I still have work to do on me. I can’t expect you to love me if I can’t fully love myself. But, yeah, I can see it on the horizon. We’re on our way.”
I’ve never had someone give me such an honest answer.
And, most importantly, I’ve never seen Bree say something full of the one thing she’s always seemed to lack: hope.
26
Bree
Ron’s meeting lasted only a few more hours before Tony and his crew took off. I spent most of the time in Declan’s arms, and I had no regrets.
I noticed some of the guys, Greg in particular, giving Declan the evil eye, but I’m not worried. I don’t know where this thing between us is going, but I know where I want it to go, and for the first time I have hope. Most importantly, I know that no matter what I’ll be okay.
I’m strong enough now. I have the help that I need in place, and the days of tortured Bree are ending.
From the look on Ron’s face when he emerges from his office, things didn’t go as well as he had hoped, but nobody was shooting when they left, so I took that as a good sign.
He muttered something to the guys about another meeting being planned in a few months and then ushered me into his office.
I sent Declan a longing look before the door shut. I kind of wished he could have come with me, but I needed to face this. It was time for me to stand on my own a bit.
“I’m not good at this emotional shit, so let me tell you my side, and then you can ask me questions, okay? Just let me get this out, darlin’,” Ron says with a deep sigh.
Once again, he sits in one of the big, overstuffed chairs in front of his desk rather than sitting behind it. I plop down in the chair next to his. I have no idea what he’s about to say.
“Your mom and I met when we were both young. When things started taking off for me in the underworld, she didn’t like it. She found out she was pregnant, and told me to quit everything and work a normal job, but I didn’t have a degree like she did. I didn’t have any skills. This…” he motions his hand around his office, “This is all I knew. This is what I was good at. I tried for a while, I really did, but old habits die hard, and I needed the money more than ever after you were born. I wanted to give you the world. I still do.” He gives me a tender look.
“So, I started working with my old crew again and she kicked me out. At first I was angry, but I couldn’t fight for you, not legally anyway. I also didn’t have a girlfriend, a wife, or anyone to help take care of you, so my hands were tied. As I slowly worked my way up the ranks, I made enemies, a lot of fucki
ng enemies, and I realized you would have only been a target for them. You would have been someone for them to hurt in order to hurt me. That’s why, even when you came in here, I never intended for anyone to know.” He stops to take a deep breath, his eyes looking both angry and sad.
“You have to believe me. I had no idea your mom was abusing you. I swear to you, darlin’, if I had had one fucking clue that’s what was happening I would have gotten you out of there. I would have fuckin’ killed that bitch.”
Ron’s eyes are pleading with me, but all I can do is sit there staring back at him blankly. Ron is my dad. I have a dad. Then, everything he said begins processing.
“I never told you Mother hurt me,” I say cautiously. No one but Alex knew that, and of course Declan, not because I told him but mainly just because he’s, well, he’s Declan, and he seems to know everything about me somehow.
“You didn’t have to. It was written all over your face the minute you came in. For a while, I thought that fucker Alex was abusing you but I realized while he was an asshole, he wasn’t that big of an asshole.” Ron leans back in his chair, looking at me. “And I would have fucking gutted him.”
“I always loved you. I always kept tabs on where you were, but apparently I wasn’t fuckin’ watching close enough, I didn’t know she was a fucking heartless cunt to you. I always kept you close to my heart, darlin’.” Ron waves his hand towards the painting of the little girl in his office.
I’d never really paid close attention to it before. It’s always been there, a staple of his office. Now I look closely, my eyes absorbing all the details.
I gasp when I realize what I’m looking at.
That’s me, probably when I was about eight or nine, at the beach on vacation. That was the only vacation mother had ever taken me on. She was forced to go to a work retreat, and didn’t trust anyone to watch me, in case they found out how horribly she treated me. It had been one of the best weeks of my life. With so many people around, she was forced to be nice to me almost constantly. I had gotten to eat almost anytime I wanted, and she had actually acted like a mother on that trip.
