“Sorry about that.” Alex smiled and wiped her face on her sleeve. “My neighbor brought them over this morning, so I took them to Chantal. I only ate one, but Vicki busted Chantal on her second. She was supposed to throw them out.”
Ashleigh returned the smile. “So you’re to blame for me having to take a two-mile walk just to burn off breakfast.”
Ashleigh felt self-conscious as Alex made a point of looking her over from head to toe. “You’re not sweating in the least. You better add a couple more miles to your walk if you’re getting rid of a jelly doughnut.”
“Actually, I just got started.” Ashleigh nodded toward the house. “You have a nice place. Your yard is beautiful.”
A flicker of pride crossed Alex’s features. “It took me a while to master the hedge trimmers. The first time I did it, the neighbors made fun of the gaps. I cut the grass too low, as well, and scalped the lawn in about a dozen places.” Alex pointed at the house across from her. “That’s how I got to know the neighbors. They took pity on me and gave me all sorts of tips. Frankly, I think they just couldn’t stand looking at the mess I was making.”
“So you do all this yourself?” Ashleigh asked, surprised.
“Uh-huh, those who hire lawn services are cheaters, so they’re not allowed in our secret group. I’d show you the handshake, but it’s too dangerous standing out in the open like this.” Alex placed a hand on Ashleigh’s lower back. “Come see the inside.”
The touch made Ashleigh jump, but if Alex noticed, she didn’t let on. Ashleigh allowed herself to be led inside and found the interior to be equally as immaculate as the exterior. “Tell me that you have a cleaning service.” Ashleigh took in the polished surfaces of the kitchen. The appliances looked as though they had just been installed.
“Don’t cook,” Alex said. “The only thing I do in here is make coffee. That’s not hard to clean up.”
Ashleigh moved through the archway in the large living room. Not a speck of dust was visible on the highly polished furniture. Everything was in its place right down to the strategically placed magazines on the coffee table. Ashleigh wondered if Alex ever sat on the sofa with the perfectly arranged pillows.
“Yes, I do have a cleaning service,” Alex said with a smile. “They were here yesterday, and I haven’t had a chance to mess it all up yet.”
Ashleigh walked over to the mantel and looked at the framed pictures. There were photos of trips taken with Vicki and Chantal, a few of the group as they performed at Lindsay’s club, but most were old shots of the band and all included Ashleigh.
“My bedroom is off-limits,” Alex said as she came to stand beside her. “It’s a mess.”
Ashleigh was relieved that she would not be given a tour of that particular room. A bedroom in her opinion was personal space, something intimate. She did not want to see the room where Alex took her lovers. Didn’t want to see the bed where she knew Alex more than likely slept naked. Being in her house stirred something within. Perhaps it was the smell. The whole house seemed to be filled with her scent that not even sweat could hide.
Alex was talking about a trip she’d taken with Vicki and Chantal, but as Ashleigh stared at one of the photos taken of the band, Alex’s voice faded. She could remember the events of that night as though it had happened yesterday. It was the night that she’d foolishly confessed her love for Alex.
They’d come off stage and were headed to the dressing room. Ashleigh felt Alex tug her hand and allowed herself to be pulled into a storage room. Alex smothered her in savage kisses. She felt Alex unfastening her pants and pulling them down her legs as she knelt.
“I’m all sweaty,” Ashleigh said as she wove her fingers into Alex’s hair.
“You still taste sweet.” Alex slipped her tongue between her legs. “I’ve been waiting all night for this.”
Ashleigh leaned hard against the wall and clutched a metal shelf with one hand while the other twisted in Alex’s wet hair. Within minutes, Alex had her ready. It had always been so easy between them. Alex knew where and how to touch her with no guidance. She’d been the one to teach Ashleigh how to let go and give into passion. Her first orgasm had been at Alex’s touch, and now Alex was bringing her effortlessly to another one.
With a groan, Ashleigh slid down the wall and away from Alex’s relentless tongue. “I love you,” she said, looking into Alex’s eyes. For a split second, she saw something in them that said Alex felt the same. Alex opened her mouth to say something, then looked away.
Ashleigh felt herself being tugged to her feet. Alex kissed her quickly, then knelt and pulled up her pants. “We have to go. They’re going to take us to the bus in a minute.”
Ashleigh bowed her head and focused on fastening her belt. She couldn’t bear to look back into Alex’s eyes.
“You have no idea what you mean to me, Ashleigh,” Alex whispered in her ear, then she turned and walked from the room.
“I guess I never will.” Ashleigh leaned against the wall, choking back the tears and feeling utterly foolish.
“Ash?” Alex said, drawing her back.
“Sorry, I guess I just zoned out there for a second. Must be all the sugar from the doughnut,” Ashleigh said with an embarrassed smile.
“Want to see my handiwork?”
“Your what?”
“Come.” Alex took her by the hand and led her to the back door.
The backyard was divided into two sections. One side was a winter garden, and the other was tilled up into rows waiting to be planted. Beyond that was a greenhouse. Alex let go of her hand and opened the door. A wave of heat assailed Ashleigh as she stepped inside.
“It’s like summer in here all year-round,” Alex said proudly. “I’ve got tomatoes, cucumbers, and some squash that isn’t doing very well.” Alex tugged at one of the vines and frowned.
The same perfume that Alex had always worn seemed to intensify in the heat and a flood of memories washed over Ashleigh again as Alex talked about her plants.
“Always in control, aren’t you?” Ashleigh said as she pushed Alex back onto the bed.
“I only want to please.” Alex grinned.
“What if I want to please?” Ashleigh ran her fingertips over Alex’s stomach.
Alex didn’t utter a word. She watched as Ashleigh’s fingers trailed lower.
“Look at me, Alex.” Ashleigh smiled as Alex did as she asked. “Put your hands on the headboard and don’t move them until I say you can.”
Alex’s lip twitched, and for a moment, Ashleigh thought she wouldn’t comply.
“Do it.” Ashleigh watched as Alex slowly raised her arms. “Keep your eyes on mine.”
Ashleigh supported her weight on her elbow so that she could keep eye contact while her other hand traced lazy circles over Alex’s skin. She bit her lip when Alex’s eyes widened for a second as she slipped her fingers between her legs. “I think about touching you like this when you’re touching me.” Alex’s eyes slipped closed as she moaned softly.
“Open your eyes,” Ashleigh said as she kissed the corner of her mouth. She stared into eyes so dark they were almost black. Ashleigh’s arousal rose as Alex took shuddering breaths. The muscles in her legs twitched and shook the bed. “Too quick,” Ashleigh said and pulled her hand away for a moment. She heard Alex’s hands slip from the headboard. “Don’t let go.”
Alex tightened her grip and her body trembled when Ashleigh resumed. Her eyes became unfocused and heavy- lidded. Ashleigh leaned down and kissed her parted lips, then looked back at her. “Close your eyes now, Alex, and come for me.” Ashleigh kissed her way down the side of Alex’s face and buried her face in her hair. Alex’s body shook once more, and the sound she made filled Ashleigh with excitement and wonder.
“Zoned out again?”
“I’m really sleepy, I guess,” Ashleigh said dreamily. “I haven’t been sleeping well and…it’s sweltering in here.”
“I’m sorry. I start talking about all this stuff and I get carried away.”
Alex brushed past Ashleigh and held the door open for her to exit.
Guilt assailed her as Erica’s face replaced Alex’s in her mind. She felt unfaithful and ashamed. “Um, I’m gonna go back to the house,” Ashleigh said, backing away from Alex. “I think I need a nap.”
“Want me to walk you?” Alex looked a bit confused.
“No, I’ll be fine.”
“Okay then. There’s a shortcut through the vacant lot a block down. I’ve made a trail, you’ll see it. It’ll take you right up to the hole in the fence.”
“Thanks, I’ll see you later.” Ashleigh hurried through the gate and nearly ran to the sidewalk. Her head cleared as she walked quickly down the street and found the trail. “Never, never spend time alone in her house with her,” Ashleigh said, chastising herself. As if to accentuate the point, she felt her phone vibrate. She pulled it from her pocket and saw that Erica had sent her a message.
May I call you?
Ashleigh dialed the number, and when Erica answered, she said, “Yes, but I thought I’d call you.” Hearing Erica’s voice chased away the lustful haze that memories brought back unbidden.
“Are you doing okay?”
“No, are you?” Ashleigh said with a goofy smile.
“Better, now that I’ve heard your voice.”
Ashleigh closed her eyes and leaned her head against the fence that separated her from Vicki and Chantal’s yard. Tears sprang to her eyes. She wanted to scream, I want to come home.
“I was wondering if you’d like to do something Saturday night.”
“Yes…no, I can’t,” Ashleigh said as she remembered her prior commitment.
“You have another date?” Erica asked playfully, but there was an edge to her voice.
“I promised to do a show Saturday. How about Friday?”
“Friday’s not good for me. We have the employee banquet then.” Neither said anything for a moment. “And here we are,” Erica said faintly.
“What does that mean, Erica?” Ashleigh asked dejectedly.
“Nothing really. I guess we both have other obligations. I’ll call you next week. Maybe we’ll have time then. Bye.”
What did Erica expect her to do? She could no more cancel her plans than Erica could. But there was that tone that said “your new life is getting in my way.” They seemed to have come so far with that one phone call and now they were back to square one. That thought burned in Ashleigh’s stomach as she climbed through the fence.
Chapter Twenty-six
“You didn’t call her.” Kaitlyn stood in the open doorway of Erica’s office.
Erica shoved a stack of printouts to the corner of her desk. “She has other plans.”
Kaitlyn walked in and took her usual seat. “What’s she doing?”
“They have a show to do,” Erica said sarcastically.
“Ya know, you’re both wrong and you’re both right. You two are going to have to learn to compromise, and you’d think after five years, y’all would already have this down.”
“You’d think that our relationship would be important enough for her to skip twirling around on stage for one night.”
Kaitlyn scrubbed at her face with both hands. “I take back what I said a minute ago. You, Erica, are so damn wrong it’s ridiculous. Could you take her out Friday night instead? No, because you have a banquet. You can’t be the only one to have a life outside of your relationship.”
“It’s work, Kaitlyn.”
“It’s always work.” Kaitlyn sprang to her feet. “And she’s understood and accepted it. Now Ash has something she wants to do, and you refuse to budge.”
“Out, get out now. I have work to do and so do you.”
Kaitlyn stalked toward the door, then turned and leaned across Erica’s desk so they were nose to nose. “You hide behind your work and you be pig-headed. But she’s got someone with her now that understands her. How long are you going to push Ashleigh into her arms before you regret it?”
“Out,” Erica said low and cold. “And close the door.” She watched as Kaitlyn stood and looked at her angrily for a second, then left, closing the door behind her.
Erica leaned back in her chair and stared at the ceiling. She knew that she was being selfish, she knew it, but when pressed, she was determined to hold her ground. She was hurting enough, and self-preservation was what she clung to.
Erica canceled her routine meetings with the department heads and hid herself away behind the closed door of her office. She stared at the ever-growing to-do list, unable to find the energy or concentration to tackle the easiest of tasks. She was staring at the computer screen when she heard her door being opened.
“Why is this door closed?” Bob Barrett asked as he moved into the room without invitation.
“I needed to concentrate,” Erica said defensively.
He stared at her long and hard, and Erica fought not to squirm beneath his gaze. “We need to have a meeting,” he said in a tone that Erica knew better than to argue with.
“What time, and who do you want to attend?” Erica picked up her pen and prepared to make notes.
“Now, between you and me, alone. Grab your things.” He turned and walked from her office.
Erica grabbed a notepad and pen and followed him up the hall irritated at the interruption. He’d left the company in her hands. Why was he intervening now?
Bob exchanged pleasantries with a few employees as they made their way down the hall. Erica noticed that he’d gone the opposite way of the conference room. When he pushed through an exterior door, Erica shielded her eyes from the bright sunlight with the notepad. She followed him without a word until he walked up to his truck and pulled open the passenger door.
“Where are we going? I haven’t made any arrangements to leave the office.”
“I took care of that.” Bob gestured none too patiently for her to get inside.
“Dad, I’ve got a ton of work piled up,” Erica said when he climbed into the driver’s seat.
“There will always be work piled up. It’s the nature of the business.”
“Where are we going?” Erica asked again, feeling her anxiety rise.
“Bell River.”
“Dad, no! I can’t go all the way out there. It’ll be midnight before we get back.”
“You’re taking the day off,” Bob said brusquely. “Hell, it’d probably do you good to take the week off. Keep arguing with me and I’ll make that happen.”
Erica narrowed her eyes and stared at his profile, his face was as rigid as she was sure hers looked. “Did Kaitlyn call you?”
“No, but she should have. I had a chat with her when I found your door closed.”
Erica sank back into the seat and massaged her temples. “So you know everything.”
“You should’ve told me.”
“It’s not something I wanted to shout to the world.”
“Telling me or your mother about what’s going on in your life is not ‘shouting it to the world.’ You could’ve called and said you needed time to sort things out. I could’ve taken over for you.”
“I need to work. I need the distraction,” Erica said around the lump in her throat. The last time her father had seen her cry, she was ten. She perceived that he felt it was a sign of weakness, and she would not allow that.
Bob opened his mouth to speak, then cleared his throat. “Your momma is looking forward to seeing you. You haven’t been around much, and you haven’t come out to see the new place.”
Erica looked toward the passenger window and clamped her eyes shut. “Dad, please turn around. I’m not up for family visits right now. Just let me go back to the office.”
“Can’t do that, kiddo, won’t. Kaitlin has everything under—”
“I don’t give a damn about the office! I want to go home,” Erica shouted as she unbuckled the seat belt and threw it off her shoulder. It bounced off the glass with a loud clang.
Bob reached over and grabbed her by the arm as he kept his eyes on the r
oad. “What are you going to do, girl? Jump?” He pulled the truck over to the shoulder, maintaining his grip on Erica. When he had the vehicle in park, he turned and looked at her. “Just let it go.”
“Let what go?” Erica asked miserably as she stared through the windshield.
Bob didn’t say anything more and Erica felt the last vestiges of her control crumble. “Damn it.” Erica slammed her hands on the dashboard. Unrestrained tears poured down her cheeks, adding to her misery. “Dad, take me home please. I’m begging you,” Erica pleaded in gasps.
“If that was truly what you needed, I would.” Bob reached over and stroked her head. “You can push everyone away in your misery, but not your mom and dad.”
Erica slumped over the console into his arms. “I’ve lost everything.” She wept into his shoulder. “I just want to curl up in a ball and let the world go on without me.”
“I know, hon.”
After a while, Erica sat up, feeling embarrassed. “I can’t face mom like this.” She wiped her face on her sleeve.
“Don’t worry about that, honey,” Bob said with a slight smile. “Put your seat belt back on.”
Erica did as she was asked and settled in for the ride, resigned to the fact that she was not going back home. They drove in silence for nearly an hour when Bob pulled onto a gravel road and followed it into the swamp.
“How long has it been since you’ve eaten?”
Erica shrugged. “I had a bagel this morning.”
“There’s a boat store out here that has the best boudin I’ve ever eaten.”
As the water came into view, Erica noticed the old wood-framed building nestled beneath a grouping of cypress trees. Moss swung lazily from the branches in the breeze. A sign read Best boudin in Louisiana and below that, live bait. Erica’s stomach roiled.
“Any requests?” Bob asked as he parked and threw the door open.
“Beer, I don’t care what kind, just lots of it.”
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