Behind the Lens

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Behind the Lens Page 3

by Heather Dahlgren


  I shake my head to clear it of these ridiculous thoughts and finish my run home. I walk inside, completely drenched in sweat and legs feeling like rubber, loving it because I know I got a great workout. I make myself a quick omelet and sit down to relax before taking a shower. My phone rings, and I see it’s Max. “Hey, man.”

  “Jax, listen, I really appreciate you picking me up last night. I’ll make it up to you tonight. I’ve got awesome steaks, lots of beer, and a few fine ladies.” I laugh and finish off my omelet.

  “Sounds good. What time you heading over tonight?” I put my dishes in the dishwasher and head out back to have a quick cigarette before my shower.

  “I was thinking around seven o’clock. I figured it would be nice if I got the steaks there before everyone showed up.” I take a long drag of my cigarette and flick the ashes.

  “That works.” We talk a bit longer, but after I finish my cigarette, we hang up because I need to get my ass showered. I jump in the shower and let the hot water pound on me. It feels so good after my run to let my muscles relax. I get out and wrap a towel around my waist before standing in front of the mirror. I’m not a conceited person, but I will give myself credit because I work my ass off for this body. My arms are fully covered in tattoos, and the muscles just accent them more, in my opinion. My legs are toned, I have a definite six pack, and what some people call fuck lines. I chuckle at that thought and make my way to get dressed.

  After I am dressed in my faded jeans, black Wicked Union T-shirt I got at their concert, and toss on a black and blue Diamond hat, I grab my phone to give my brother a call. I dial his number and make my way outside to have a cigarette before heading to the store. “What’s up, Jax?” My brother is fucking amazing. He has done a lot for me through the years. I used to get into a lot of trouble as a teenager, and my brother was the one who gave me a job to pull me away from that crowd of people. I don’t know what my life would be like if he hadn’t done that. I was definitely on a downward spiral.

  “Hey, man, just wanted to make sure you are going to stop by tonight.” I take a drag and lean back in my seat.

  “Yea, I’ll stop by. I’m just finishing up here. We finally got this fucking job done. Blake kicked ass today, so we will start that new job on Redwood Street on Monday.” I smile, shaking my head. My brother loves talking business, until I can get a few beers in him that is.

  “Cool. Maybe you’ll find a girl to take home tonight.” I look over when I hear the slider open and Blake come walking out.

  “Doubtful. Alright, I’m going to finish up so I can go home and shower soon. I’ll see you in a few hours.” We hang up and I think about him being lonely. He was engaged, bought a house with a fucking white picket fence, and fully furnished it. He came home early from work one day and found his buddy balls deep in his fiancée. He lost his shit, started throwing stuff and breaking things. Although I don’t blame him, his buddy is lucky it wasn’t me because I would have beat him within an inch of his life. He threw all her clothes and belongings out the window onto the front lawn, all while she was crying and begging him to forgive her. He never said a word to her, even when she was grabbing onto his shirt. She’d made her bed, so to speak, and he let her lie in it. Since then, he won’t date and he’s only hooked up with maybe two chicks. That was four years ago. I always try to get him to at least consider taking a girl home.

  “Jax!” I snap out of my thoughts and look at Blake. “Fuck, did you hear me?” I finish off my cigarette and put it out.

  “Shit, sorry, brother. What’s up?” He shakes his head.

  “I said if you give me twenty minutes, I’ll run to the store with you.”

  “Yea, that’s cool. Max is bringing steaks and beer, but I’m sure we will need more beer, and I’ll get some burgers and hot dogs too.” He gives me a nod and walks into the house. I stand up to turn on the pool just as my phone rings. I look at the number, but I don’t know it. “Hello?” I hear of all things Jinks playing in the background, but it is turned down quickly.

  “Hi, is this Jax Burke?” I pull the phone away from my ear and check the number, definitely no one I know.

  “Yes. Who’s this?” I turn the pool on and head back under the shade of the patio.

  “Hi, Jax, my name is Kallie Gregory. I’m a photographer. I got your number from Maxwell Smyth.” I smile and sit down.

  “Oh right, he told me to expect your call.” I can hear her moving papers around.

  “Great. I would love to have you be a part of this shoot I’m trying to get together in three weeks. I know it’s short notice, but a few of the girls I work with will be gone for a while, and I really want them a part of it also. I am trying to get together a handful of both male and female models with tattoos to do a bunch of different shots on the beach. I want it to be different, with a large group. I’ll also do individual shots as well as couple shots. I just have this amazing idea I’d love to see come alive. It will be three weeks from today. We will start at sunrise to get the early sun, and I’d like to do the final shots at sunset. Obviously, I’m not a bitch, and we won’t shoot all day without breaking. Would you be able to make it?” I chuckle lightly at everything she just got out without so much as a breath. She definitely seems like someone I’d like to work with.

  “Kallie, I think that sounds awesome. I’d love to be a part of it.” I actually think I hear her breathe a sigh of relief.

  “Thank you, Jax. It will be amazing. Now Max said I should also talk to your friend Blake, but he didn’t give me a contact number for him. Would you happen to have that?” I don’t know what the hell it is about her, but she keeps making me smile.

  “He’s my best friend and roommate. I can tell him about it for you if you like, but I can already tell you he will definitely be there also.”

  “That is very sweet, but I’d like to talk with him. I like to talk to all my models personally, and by no means does that mean I don’t appreciate your offer. It’s just how I like to do things.” Right there, I can tell she is the real deal.

  “I completely understand that. Honestly, I respect that.” I don’t know how, but I know she is smiling at that. I give her Blake’s number and wait while she jots it down.

  “Great, I’ve got it. Jax, it was great talking with you, and I look forward to meeting and working with you. If you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to give me a call. Do you have my number on your phone, or do you need it?” I check once again to make sure I have it.

  “I have it. Thank you for the opportunity, Kallie, I’ll see you in three weeks.” We hang up, and I immediately save her number. She seems like a photog that I would love to work with, so hopefully this shoot will bring more.

  Blake and I went to the store and got everything we needed for tonight. He talked with Kallie too, so now we are just hanging out back, drinking a beer, and waiting for everyone to get here.

  “Hey, Blake, go turn that hot tub on for me.” He flips me off but gets up to do it. We sit bullshitting for an hour before Max walks in the backyard.

  “Max, you fucking dick, how’s it going?” Blake gets up to help him, and I follow suit. I’m shocked at all the stuff he brought. I grab the beer and put it by the coolers, and we head inside.

  “Damn, Max, you didn’t need to bring so much. Thanks, man.” He puts down twelve packages of steaks and leans on the counter.

  “Just showing my appreciation for getting my drunk ass.” I grab a beer for each of us out of the fridge and give it to them.

  “No problem, man. I’m going to fire up the grill. You and Blake can start marinating the steaks.” I go outside and lift up the grill hood.

  “Look at this sexy guy being all manly at the grill.” I turn around, and Monica stands there with a few of her friends. She’s beautiful, stunning really, with a kickass body, but she’s just a friend. We fooled around once, and it just didn’t do anything for either of us. We’ve been really good friends since. Her friends tonight though, they are gett
ing the attention of my cock. I smile and wink at her before heading over to give her a hug.

  “Hey, Mon. How are you?” She starts telling me all about a shoot she did yesterday and work before she stops herself.

  “Holy shit, I’m so sorry. Jax, this is Summer, that is Anna, and this is Ivy.” I give them all a nod but give Summer a wink. She’s fucking hot.

  “Yo, Jax, come grab these steaks and quit hiding outside.” I shake my head and laugh but give my attention back to the girls.

  “There is beer in the coolers, but I have other stuff inside too. Please help yourselves. Monica knows where everything is.” I go inside to grab the steaks, and Blake lifts his eyebrows. “What? Monica is here.” He laughs and takes a sip of his beer.

  “Not just Monica, you douche.” He and Max laugh again when I flip them off and grab the tray of steaks.

  After about two hours, the party is in full swing. There are easily forty people here, maybe more. There are people in the pool, hot tub, sitting down, or just standing around talking. I texted my brother an hour ago, but haven’t heard back. I guess he is blowing me off again. He does that from time to time, so it doesn’t bother me. I’m standing by the fire pit smoking when Summer comes walking over in nothing but a tiny bright pink bikini, leaving very little to the imagination. I give her a half-smile as she reaches me. “Hey, Jax. I was wondering what happened to you.” I give her a wink and take a drag of my cigarette.

  “Just having a smoke before I start the fire.” She looks around the yard then back at me. She doesn’t say anything, just stares at me. “Can I get you a drink?”

  “Nah. Nice place, you rich?” What the hell?

  “Rich? No. But thanks, I like it.” She reaches out her hand and lightly touches my arm. I just stand there, because it’s like she isn’t sure what the hell she is doing. She’s petting me like a dog. Yea, this isn’t going to happen. Luck is on my side when Ivy calls her, and she runs over. I roll my eyes and start the fire.

  Max walks over with a beer for me, and I gladly take it. “Did you have an enlightening conversation with Summer?” I almost spit my beer out and start laughing right along with him.

  “Holy shit, man. That is not a chick I find attractive. I like to at least be able to have a conversation.” He shakes his head and sits down.

  “Tell me about it. I met her a few months ago at a party, and after about thirty seconds, my dick tried crawling into my body.” This time I do spit my beer out.

  “Yea, I’m thinking my dick is in hiding right now too.” We talk for a few minutes, and the bigger the fire grows, the more people make their way over. We are all talking, laughing, and drinking pretty heavily. Monica comes over and sits on my lap since there are no chairs available. I don’t even think anything of it; there are no feelings there what so ever.

  The longer the night goes on, the more drunk everyone is getting. There are people making out all over the place like a damn porno. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of times I’ve been doing the same, but tonight, I’m just not feeling it. No one here has caught my attention for more than a few minutes, which I’ll admit it sucks because I was hoping to have some company tonight. I decide to go grab a beer. I don’t stop at the cooler and go to the fridge, taking a few minutes to myself. I’m leaning up against the counter when someone comes walking down the hallway. She turns the corner, and my cock jumps to attention. Where the fuck has this girl been all night? She jumps when she sees me. “Shit, I didn’t mean to scare you.” She gives me a shy smile, and I know my night has just turned around.

  “Sorry, I didn’t know anyone was in here. I’m Jenni. I was supposed to meet Monica here earlier, but I just got here.” That’s why I didn’t see her, because I know I’d remember her even in my drunk state.

  “I’m Jax. Nice to meet you. Can I get you a drink?” She shakes her head and bites her lip. Fuck me. “Can I get you anything?” I move a little closer, and she looks a little nervous, but when I put my hands on the wall above her, she smiles up at me. “You are beautiful.” She looks down then slowly lifts her head to look at me.

  “Thank you.” I can see her chest heaving with anticipation, and I fucking love it.

  “Am I making you nervous, beautiful Jenni?” She shakes her head and I wink at her. “Good.” I don’t even give her time to think. I slam my mouth to hers, and she moans, opening right up. It doesn’t take long for me to realize I need this girl in my bed and my dick in her. And that’s exactly what happens, twice.

  I AM SITTING AT MY computer editing a shit load of pictures from the last week. I am so incredibly happy with the results of all of them. I definitely have some extremely sexy ones, which make me happy, since that is what I was going for. I also did a lot of outdoor shots. I’ve found some amazing places locally to take photos, from the beach, to the woods, and everything in-between. I have a friend who has some cars from the fifties, and I did some unbelievable shots of Brinley and Max. There is one of her lying back on the hood and Max hovering over her; it is stunning honestly. I rub my eyes and decide I need to take a break since my eyes are tired now. I go into the kitchen and make myself a quick sandwich, taking it to the living room to watch some TV.

  Just as I finish my lunch, my cell phone rings. “Hello?”

  “Aunt Kal.” I smile and lay my head back on the couch.

  “Hi, baby girl. How are you?” She giggles, and I can’t keep the smile off my face. I adore my nieces; they mean the world to me. I love when I get a random phone call from Dawn. She’s only five, but always seems to be able to sneak my brother’s phone away. She looks at the pictures next to the phone number before calling; she’s a smart little thing.

  “Daddy is in the shower, and Mommy is napping with Tiffany. Guess what? I colored you a picture, and Daddy said I can give it to you soon. When can I come to your house? I want to play in the picture room. Can you take my picture?” I laugh, trying to keep up with her.

  “Thank you for coloring me a picture. I will talk to Daddy, and we will make plans for you to come over. I will definitely take your picture. You are my favorite model.” She giggles.

  “Aunt Kal, yesterday at school, we had gym, and I played with a parachute. We got to run under it, and we hided from Mrs. Jones. Did you play parachute in school? Want to hear a new song?” I take a sip of my soda and smile, loving this conversation.

  “Yes, I did play parachute in gym. I loved it. Of course, I want to hear you sing.” I look over at the family picture I have of Braden and his family. His wife Sarah is beautiful, and so are the girls. I’m so happy with the life he has made for himself. It gives me hope that one day I will have something similar.

  “I’m a puppy . . . bark, bark, bark. I like to be pet, and I lick your face. I am chasing the ball and sliding on the floor.” She laughs, and I know she is just singing what the dog is doing.

  “Sweetie, I love that song.” I hear Braden in the background and know our conversation will soon be over.

  “But Daddy, I want to talk to Aunt Kal.” I hear him tell her to say goodbye, and she does with a sad little voice.

  “Hey, Kallie, sorry. You know how she loves to play with my phone, well steal it is more like it.” I laugh and get up to put my dish in the dishwasher.

  “Stop, Braden, I love when she calls me. She wants to come over so we need to make plans. How are you?” He proceeds to tell me how tired he is between working and having the kids.

  “You love every second of it. You can’t bullshit me.” He laughs.

  “I do. Listen, I need to get Dawn over to Sarah’s parents’ house. They are keeping her overnight to give us a little break. I’ll call you during the week and make plans. Love you.” We hang up, and I figure I’m done with editing pictures for the day. I want to do something. I grab my camera and head down to the beach. I like to do this every once in a while—go to the beach and just snap random pictures. It is relaxing to me.

  I wish I lived close enough to the beach to walk, but it’s only a
short drive. Once I get there, I get out and head over to one of the big rocks I like to sit on and people watch. I still like to take pictures of objects, not just people, so I focus where the sand meets the rocks and snap. I smile looking at the picture and just begin snapping. Nothing specific, I just snap away. “This rock taken?” I look over at a very good-looking guy and smile.

  “Not that I’m aware of.” He laughs and I smile at him.

  “What are you doing exactly?” I hold up my camera.

  “Just taking a few pictures.” He nods his head and sips on the coffee he has in his hands. I normally don’t have company when I’m here, so I’m a little uncomfortable taking pictures now.

  “Please don’t stop invading people’s privacy because I’m here.” I snap my head to him, and he is just staring at the crowds of people on the beach.

  “Excuse me?” He looks over at me and shrugs his shoulders.

  “That’s what you’re doing. You are taking photos of people without their knowledge, therefore, you are invading their privacy.” I just keep staring at him, and he is looking right back at me. “Cat got your tongue?” I clear my throat and turn to face him.

  “First of all, who the fuck are you? Second, I am doing nothing of the such. I am capturing the beauty that is around me. I’m a professional photographer, so maybe before you come over here accusing me of something, you should know what the fuck you are talking about. Now if you’ll excuse me, I don’t feel so inspired anymore.” I stand up and make my way to my car, feeling pissed and hurt. I climb in and close the door. For the first time in my life, I wonder if maybe I shouldn’t be here taking pictures, maybe I am doing just what he said. I back out of my spot and head toward home. The more I think about it, the more I know he’s wrong. I never focus on anyone’s face, and I always, always fade them out. Asshole, making me question what I do.

 

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